Title: Puck's badass foolproof plan to get Berry.
Rating: M for language (namely Puck's potty mouth) and themes of a sexual nature.
Pairing: PuckleBerry. MatTana. The 'Inns'. BrIke.
Spoilers: None. Set after Regionals.
Summary: Beginning of Puck's Senior year, he's about to start his badass rein as top dog, but one things missing: A nice sexy female Jew to be at his side. That's when he comes up with the perfect, badass foolproof plan... but isit as foolproof as he thinks or is he the fool? Slightly AU
Disclaimer: I acknowledge that I own nothing, just the plot for this story. If I did... Puck would be shirtless ALL THE TIME and dating Rachel!
Note: Thank you to those who added this story to their favourites, put it on their alerts or review. You are awesome. Here's chapter two, after this there shall be another two chapters and then it should be done. Might write it from Rachel's perspective. :)
Part Two.
The day had surprisingly breezed by up to lunch, considering that it was the first day back to school after Summer break, and Puck had yet to see one Rachel Berry. In fact he hadn't really seen any of the Glee kids, minus Finn and Quinn who shared Puck's classes. (since when had the pair of them got back together?) But that was because while him, Finn and Quinn were Seniors, the rest of the group were only Juniors. And the two love birds hadn't seen nor heard from anyone either.
It was almost as if they were deliberately avoiding the trio. But Puck knew that wasn't the case though.
Santana and Brittany were juniors and he didn't really have a need to see the pair except Glee, there was no way he was tapping Santana's crazy ass again - he'd made that mistake Sophomore and Junior year. Don't get him wrong, Santana was a cool chick, just not when she was pining after his ass. It was weird them not being around, only last year they had shared the small group of friends and been with each other practically day in day out. But Santana and Quinn weren't on the best of terms right not because Santana's still pissed about everything that went down, and well Brittany, she just followed Santana like a lost puppy. It didn't surprise him that Santana and Quinn were avoiding one another, they hadn't ever really been friends before, they just shared mutual interest: Cheerios, Brittany and Glee. But Quinn wasn't back on the squad, and well, Brittany went where ever Santana did and Glee wasn't until after lunch.
Mike and Matt were also juniors, but he'd be seeing them later at foot-ball practise.
And while he did genuinely like Artie, (dude was insane on the guitar) Tina, (a secret sort of badass, the whole vamp thing with Figgins? awesome) Mercedes and Kurt, (the two were kinda alright, weird, but alright) he didn't really care where they were. Rachel on the other hand...
He hadn't seen Rachel or heard her loud mouth at all today, and that was freaking weird because she's Rachel big mouth Berry. There was no way she would miss school, let alone the first day, so she was definitely in... but where was she hiding?
Well it was lunch now, so she wouldn't be hiding much longer. "Come out, come out where ever you are Berry!" he chuckled.
Shrugging off his new letterman jacket and throwing it over his left shoulder, Puck smirked in satisfactory as he swaggered down the hallway showing off his new tat feeling smug as people gaped, pointed and stared in awe at him. He knew he looked even more of a stud now then before Summer. (how it's possible falls flat on him) Over the Summer he had trained flat out and piled on 18 pounds, all muscle of course and tanned nicely. His dark wash low rise jeans hanging on his hips but tight on his ass, and the tight fitting plain white wife beater he was wearing show just how developed his bod was.
As he entered the cafeteria he let his eyes scan the room. He spotted Quinn and Finn sat with the Glee kids but there was no sign of Rachel. Shrugging he headed to the 'popular' table where the jocks and Cheerios sat and slid into a seat grabbing a burger off of Matt's tray and a can of coke from Mike's. Nodding a thanks that they'd picked him something up like he'd asked.
Immediately the table all chorused a welcome to him.
"Sup Puck." Mike grinned from his seat beside Britt, quickly leaning across and holding out his fist in which Puck bumped with a grin. "No way dude! Your tattoo's sick!" he added in awe. "I want one, but my Mom and Dad would kill me!"
As soon as Mike mentioned the tattoo, everyone immediately leaned over to peer at the marking and nodded in approval.
"Badass dude." One of the jocks, Jack Langathol, grinned.
"Listen dude you might be our new Quarter Back, but that don't mean we're your slaves!" Matt joked as he too bumped fists with Puck.
"Yeah yeah, I'll bare that in mind." Puck grinned, he and everyone knowing the statement was empty.
"Hi Puck." Brittany smiled.
"Looking good Puckerman. I see you've been working out." Santana quipped appreciably, but before Puck could panic he seen Matt lean over and peck Santana's cheek with a 'Not as good as me though right babe?' to which Santana replied 'Of course not baby!' Matt and Santana? huh.
"Noah." Rachel smiled from her seat between Santana and Brittany.
"Hey Rach." Puck smirked. WAIT RACHEL?
"Rachel?" he voiced his thoughts with wide eyes, stunned at the site of the brunette beauty. How had he not noticed her before? And what was she doing here, at the popular table with San and Britt? Summer had obviously been good to Rachel, she looked smokin'!
"Yes?" Rachel grinned biting her lip, drawing Puck's attention to them. He also noticed Rachel had a fringe now. Very nice.
"Er, what you doing here? Not that I don't mind or nothing, just shocked. You know, I've been looking for you all day." Puck leered suggestively.
"Puckerman do you want me remove your balls from you body? No? Then shut your trap. Rach has been with us all day, and it doesn't matter why she's hear really does it? She's our friend, if you got anything to say about it then I'd think fast." Santana snapped defensively.
"Yeah Puck, Rach is our friend now. She has been all Summer." Brittany chirped as she stole a handful of Mike's frys, cautiously looking over her shoulder, expecting Sue to be there with her mega-phone, before devouring them.
"Woah chill ladies. I was just curious." Puck laughed, though inside he was dumbfounded. Santana, Rachel and Brittany were friends?
"Yeah well, now your not." Santana replied with a smile. "We've been friends since Regionals actually. B's cool and smokin' hot so she fits in with us." Santana grinned directing the last part at Rachel who ducked her head as a blush creeped up her kneck.
"Yeah, and we all went to New York together for Summer! We've been best friends since Rachel dumped Finn." Brittany grinned.
Puck choke on the coke he had just sipped. "Berry, you dumped Finn?" he asked stunned, wasn't she supposed to be obsessed with him?
"Yes, whys that so hard to believe? Everyone keeps saying that, well the Glee members." Rachel pouted.
"Because your supposed to be batshit crazy in love with the goof?" Puck said dumbly, rasing an eyebrow.
"I'm not 'batshit crazy in love with the goof' as you so eloquently put it. If I were, then wouldn't I be dating him now?" Rachel mocked.
"Woah you just said shit!" Puck laughed getting side tracked. "But back to the point, yes you are! You practically stalked him your Sophomore year." Puck reminded, feeling jealousy boil as he remembered.
"What's the big deal about me saying shit?" Rachel asked. "And NO I did not 'stalk' Finn. Admittedly I was attracted to him, but I only pursued him when he was available not when he was dating Quinn, that was all Finn's doing." Rachel huffed in annoyance.
"OK what ever. I'm not going to argue with you when I know that I am right. So, why did you and Finn split then? And it's funny because you're Rachel miss goody-two-shoes Berry, aren't you supposed to like, not condone shit talk?" Puck laughed taking a bite of his burger.
Rachel snorted. "Oh please Noah, you're acting as if my split with Finn and me swearing is some juicy gossip. Which it's not!"
"A, you swearing is huge and B, you, who spent half her time up Finn's ass the past year, split with the dude. So yeah, it's gossip."
"OK I'll put it in words you will understand. A," Rachel said mockingly. "me swearing is not fucking huge, but you wouldn't know that because you spend most of your life up your own fucking ass. And B, my split with Finn is none of your fucking business." Rachel smirked. "Understand?"
"That's my girl!" Santana grinned high-fiving Rachel. Seriously who does that now? Puck thought annoyed.
"Damn Rach! You just owned his ass!" Matt barked in laughter along with Mike a few other jocks.
"What ever, I don't care about your split with Finn. I need a favour." Puck grunted, not happy that Rachel Berry had just humiliated him.
"Ew. What ever it is, no." Rachel said, her nose wrinkling.
"Not like that babe, get your head out of the gutter. But if you ever wanna ride on the Puckerone, you let me know." Puck smirked.
"Please, your one to talk." Rachel snorted. "And as appealing as the idea sounds, which is not at all, no thank you." she grinned.
"Just meet me in the choir room before Glee." Puck grunted as he stood from the table. "Later." he called as he left the cafeteria.
As Puck walked briskly through the schools hallway, he thought back to what had just happened. Rachel, Santana and Brittany were friends? Fucking crazy, since when? Well after Regionals apparently, but how in the hell had that happened? And then there was the fact that she was not only sat on the 'popular table' but everyone had seemed to gladly welcome her. They all seemed to actually like Rachel. Not that he could blame them, craziness aside, Rachel was actually a pretty cool chick. Would he be trying to get her now if she wasn't? And it helped that Rachel had seemed to mellow out and change her choice of clothing over the Summer. Puck believed Santana had helped with that. But the worst part? his plan didn't even work, hell he didn't even get the chance to use it.
The plan had been to simply charm her with his studly looks and words of wisdom. Well that had gone out the window.
It was time to bring in the big guns, metaphorically of course. And he knew just what to do. There's no way that this plan wouldn't work, know why? 'Cause A, he had come up with it. B, he was a stud and C? It was undeniably freaking foolproof and badass. Pulling out his phone, Puck hit number 6 on his speed dial, a triumph smirk on his face as he entered the choir room.
"What do you want now?" A female voice hissed through the speaker.
"Nice to hear from you too." Puck grunted sarcastically before the smirk reappeared. "So listen I have this plan, and I need your help..."
Ok so now we're halfway through the small multi-short. I'm sorry if any of the character seem out of character, namely Rachel, but I hope the excuse I used kind of explains that. But on a better note! What do you all think so far? Like the new Rachel? What about the PezBerrittany friendship, you like? (A) And just who was Puck on the phone to? You'll have to review and read the next chapter to find out! Toodles.