Chapter Six
"Gale? Gale?" the tiny whisper wakes me up.
I rub my eyes and turn to face the noise. It's Posy. She's come into my room. It must be around three in the morning.
"Posy?" I say sleepily.
"I had a bad dream." she replies in a small voice. "Can I crawl in with you?"
"Why didn't you go to Mom?" I ask gently. Posy and my mother share a room while Vick, Rory and I share one. Rory and Vick have to share a bed, but theirs is bigger than mine, which I occupy alone.
Posy looks at me sadly for a moment.
"Mommy can't fight away the monsters." Posy says.
"But I can." I say with a smile.
I can't let Posy down, she looks so cute and scared. I make room in my bed and pat it. Posy jumps on and curls up next to me.
"Those monsters won't get past me." I say, flexing my arm muscles.
Posy reaches out and touches my arm, giggling.
I wait in bed until Posy falls asleep. It doesn't take very long. Soon her eyes close and her breathing becomes deep and less frequent. I try to sleep but it's useless, even though I really do need my sleep.
I give up and just try to choose the words I will say to Katniss when she gets back. If she gets back. No, when she gets back because she is coming back. I argue with myself all of the time now. Even though being a District 12 tribute is practically a death sentence, Katniss has to make it back.
I continue to try to string words together in my brain, but they all either just sound wrong or aren't strong enough to express my emotions. When will I tell Katniss this anyway? When she gets back, the public will be all over her. Well, if Katniss comes out of the arena anything like she is now, she's going to go hunting with me someday. A pain jolts through me as I think about never hunting with Katniss again. I have to stop thinking like this.
I look down at Posy who is sleeping very hard. Why does the Capitol make us go through this? Risk our children's lives, force us to sit by as they slowly die. Surely the Capitol has some sense of goodness or possibly a small, shriveled heart. Maybe all of this will end someday. I want to live to see it end, or die trying to stop it.
When I wake up, Posy is still sleeping by my side. I must've fallen asleep somewhere in my angry train of thoughts. I get up, trying to get out of the room without disturbing my little sister. She stirs as I leave the bed, but doesn't wake.
I groggily head out to my kitchen where I fix myself a meal. My mother walks in.
"Gale, I just wanted to know, how are you doing in school?" She asks.
I put my fork down and concentrate on my plate.
"I'm fine." I say. I notice that this is probably the sentence I've said most since the reaping. Every single time, I've been lying.
"Are you sure?" My mom asks. She's really good at looking deeply into a person. I'm good at blocking those people.
I smile.
"Mom, I'm eighteen, I think I know when I'm fine." I say.
With that, I get up and get dressed. Will I ever get pass this stage? Right now, I have no idea.
I head to school with Rory and Vick. We part ways once we reach the school.
My classes go by slow as usual. My English teacher especially has been vigilant in noticing my spacey and unreachable demeanor. All throughout class, he looks at me, occasionally raising his eyebrows. He knows something is wrong, but I'm not going to tell him what. The truth is I don't think I have the strength to say it. My best friend is probably going to die. It's agonizing to even think about.
Finally, I go to the last period of my school day, physics. Cormack, Jareth and my friend Zeke are all in my physics class.
"Hey, Gale." Zeke says as I take a seat by him.
"Hey." I say.
I look over at two boys talking a few desks away. I hear a quick snippet of their conversation.
"That girl, Katniss Everdeen-"
I walk over to the pencil sharpener, which is conveniently placed by the pair of boys. I decide to nonchalantly listen in on their conversation.
"She looked so pretty last night in that costume." the boy with blond hair remarks.
I clench my fists. I do not like this conversation already.
"Yeah, it's such a shame that she's a tribute." the second boy, with darker hair, says.
"How long do you think she'll last, a day, two?" the blond haired boy asks with a snicker.
I've stopped sharpening my pencil, I'm too mad to care anymore.
"I don't know, I'd say a couple weeks." the second boy says.
"Let's make a bet, I say she doesn't last a week, here I have some money-
My last nerve has broken. Infuriated, I turn around and punch the boy with the blond hair. His head snaps back and he falls to the ground, clutching his bloody nose.
"What the hell!" the other boy screams as gasps fill the air. All talking has stopped and everyone's watching us.
I raise my fist again but Cormack and Jareth run over to me to stop me from punching the other kid. Zeke grabs the darker haired boy to stop him from getting to me. I struggle against my friends' forces and am unable to progress.
"Boys! Boys!" Our physics teacher yells. "Stop at once!"
It seems to have escaped me that I'm going to get in trouble for this. I just acted at the moment out of uncontrollable impulse. I stop fighting against my friends and sit down in a chair.
My friends let go of my tentatively, ready to pounce back if I move forward.
"Are you okay?" The teacher asks frantically, running over to the boy on the ground.
"Yeah." He says, trying to get up and look tough. I could take him down any day. I have the urge to give him another swing, see what he's got. I decide not to, I don't want to get into deeper trouble, my mother is going to be very upset.
The blond boy grabs a tissue and holds it to his nose.
"All of you, down to the office!" The teacher yells sternly.
Even though my friends were just trying to help, they trudge down to the principal's office with me. They truly are the best. Aside from Katniss.
The two boys that were making bets follow closely behind us, with our teacher to make sure we don't break out into brawl again.
"What was that about?" Zeke asks me, quietly, so the boys behind us don't hear.
"Katniss." I say, that being all the explanation needed.
We head into the office and my teacher summarizes the situation to the principal.
"Well, come in, boys." The principal says. "Now, let's hear all the sides of the story."
The friend of the bleeding boy speaks up.
"We were just talking and he" The boy points to me. "Just punched him."
"Really?" The principal says, shooting me a convicting stare.
"I heard them talking about my best friend." I say. Then it all spills out. "Katniss Everdeen. They were making bets on how long she'd last in the arena, saying only a few days. So I… I guess I punched him…"
I'm surprised that I kept a calm voice and only said that much. If I said what was bursting to get out right now, I'd be laying the vast contents of my mind out on the principal's desk, and that wouldn't be enough space.
"That gives you no right to harm another student." The principal warns.
"I know-it's just-
The principal cuts me off.
"I hear that your teachers are worried about you, is this why?" He says.
I take a deep breath. I need to get as much sympathy as possible if I don't want this on my permanent record, which would lower the chances of me getting a good job. I decide to play this nicely. This can be set up like a snare. I'm good with traps. I take a deep breath.
"Yes." I say. "I've been having a really tough time, my best friend being tribute and all. Also, I've been having a tough time feeding my family, and my friend's family. It's just all so…so… stressful."
The only thing that would perfect my speech would be bursting into tears. I can't do that on command so I rub my eyes and look down, trying to appear sad and embarrassed. So far, so good. I've put up the trap, I just have to wait for the prey to get caught.
The principal sighs.
"I suppose that is tough, but this can go unpunished." He says. "This will not be on your permanent record, but we will tell your parents and give you one hour detention for a week, starting today."
The detention will cut off on my hunting time, but it's a pretty good deal.
"Thank you." I say.
"Now, why are you three here?" The principal asks my friends.
"We tried to break up the fight." Cormack says.
"Is that true?" The principal asks.
We all nod. It would be nice having my friends with me in detention, but I don't want to get them in trouble.
"You may all go, you to the nurse." The principal nods at the boy I punched. "And you, Mr. Hawthorne, have to come to my office after class or your detentions will be expanded."
I nod and we all head off.
"Man, you got lucky." Zeke says once we're out of the room.
"I know." I reply.
I'm still going to have to deal with my mother, but that will come later.
"Do you want me to tell Rory and Vick that you're in detention?" Cormack asks.
"Yes, tell them I'll be going to work afterwards, too." I say.
Cormack nods. He knows what kind of 'work' I mean.
I go to my locker and gather my stuff. People point and me and whisper, turning away when I look at them, as if I might punch them too. I really do want to punch them because they act like I can't tell that they're afraid. I'm a hunter, I can sense fear. Everybody here is full of it.
I slam my locker door, which makes a few kids jump. I head to the principal's office and a few kids move out of my way.
I sigh as I walk reluctantly into the principal's office.
"Take a seat, Mr. Hawthorne." the principal says. He motions me to the seat I sat in earlier today.
"What will you have me do?" I ask. I've hear of kids cleaning, writing essays, you name it. What kind of punishment will I get for actually punching a kid?
"First, we're going to have a talk." the principal says with one of those smiles that clearly states "I'm better than you, you're in trouble, you made a mistake". I hate it when teachers give me that smile.
I really want to say something back at the principal, but I don't want to ruin my good luck.
"You are legally an adult, Mr. Hawthorne, we could have given you much more serious punishment, but since you have an outstanding record, and under the circumstances, we'll allow you to get away with this just this one time." The principal says. "However, one more action of violence out of you and this can be taken into the law. Understand?"
I nod.
"Yes, of course." I say. I would address him as 'sir', but I don't want to push my luck.
"Now, I want you to follow the instructions on this sheet and return this to me at the end of the hour." the principal says, handing me a paper.
"What if I finish?" I ask.
"Work on your homework." the principal instructs.
I nod again and read the directions on my sheet. I have to write a three paragraph essay on misdirected violence and/or anger. I sigh and get to work. I don't want to sound too unenthusiastic, but I don't want to sound so detailed and perfect that it seems like a joke. Again, I need to work this snare perfectly.
Minutes tick by until I read my essay for the final time and hand it in.
"Fifteen minutes left, Mr. Hawthorne, use your time wisely." the principal says.
I head back to my desk and work on homework. Well, at least I'm getting part of this out of the way so I don't have to worry about it all at home. My stomach flips as I wonder what my mother will say.
"Time's up, don't forget to come back tomorrow." the principal says.
I gather my things together before asking a final question.
"How many more detentions do I have?" I ask.
"Five." the principal replies.
"Okay. Bye." I say, heading out of the door.
Five more days that I will be late hunting. Five more damn days.
I try to brush the thought off my shoulders as I head to the woods. I climb safely under the fence and into the forest. The cool breeze rustles through my hair and I try to savor this moment on freedom. This is where I'd usually meet up with Katniss and tell her all about my day and my detentions. This is where she'd listen and tell me her problems. This is where I would find just a few hours of serenity and fun. But not now.
I try to discard my troubles check all of the snares as quickly as I can. I return with two rabbits and a turkey. Not the best hunting day, not the worst. Then, I go and try to gather as many berries and greens as possible. I leave for the Hob when the sun is setting.
"Gale, you're a little later than usual." Greasy Sae remarks as I enter the black market.
"Yes I am." I reply as I trade with her.
"Why is that?" Greasy Sae asks.
"I got a detention." I reply shortly. I really don't feel like confiding in anyone right now.
Greasy Sae takes some herbs in exchange for a pot of soup.
"Did you get in trouble?" She asks. "I wouldn't doubt that, kid, you're a born rebel."
"I punched a kid." I say, slightly embarrassed. I don't know if I should take being called a rebel as a compliment or not. I decide that living in Panem, I do want to be a rebel.
Greasy Sae smiles, rather than being concerned.
"Why?" Greasy Sae asks.
This woman is full of questions.
"He made me mad." I say simply. Greasy Sae raises her eyebrows.
"I sure wish I could punch someone every time I was mad." She says.
"He was talking about Katniss." I snap, contradicting the whole essay I wrote in detention.
I finish up my trades and head for home in a bad mood. On top of everything, today wasn't a particularly good haul.
"There you are!" my mother says as I get home.
"Here I am." I say under my breath. "And here it comes."
My mother runs over to me.
"Gale Hawthorne! You punched another boy!" She says with disbelief.
"Yeah, I know." I say, hanging my head slightly.
"Why on earth?" She asks.
"They were talking about Katniss and I…I… I just lost control." I admit.
"Oh, Gale." My mother moans.
"Please don't punish me, I've got detention for a week." I say, only feeling slightly ashamed.
My mother looks at me.
"For a week, that's all?" She asks.
"Yeah," I say. "They minimized the punishment because of the circumstances. You know, how I'm kind of depressed since my best friend is going to be fighting, literally, for her life and the other boys were talking about it in…well..."
I try to finish 'in not the most pleasing way' but I can't manage it.
"Like they were total…!" I refrain myself from swearing because my little sister is in the room. Instead, I pound my fist on the table and my mother jerks back in alarm.
I slowly fall into a chair and my mother rushes over to me.
"I know…I know." She says soothingly, stroking my shoulder.
Overcome with a mix of sadness and hostility, I stare at the wall.
"I can take the trades over to the Everdeens." Rory offers.
"Okay." I say. Since there's no dead animals in the haul, I let Rory take it over. Had I not traded at the Hob, I wouldn't risk Rory being caught.
Rory eagerly bounds over and picks up the Everdeens share. He goes out the door as my mother yells one final thing.
"Be back within the hour!" she says.
"Okay!" Rory replies, shutting the door.
"Honey, I'm not proud of you for this, but I know it's hard." my mother says quietly.
I nod. Head motions are easier emotionally than verbally agreeing, just in case there's a hint of sadness in my voice. I don't know why I want to conceal this from my own mother, but for some reason I feel insecure exposing this to anybody. I'm the man of my house, I'm supposed to be tough. I've legally been an adult for a few months, but I've been an adult since I was thirteen, when my father died. I don't want to act like a child.
"It's okay to cry sometimes." my mother says.
A tear falls down my cheek not just because of Katniss. My mother said these same words, in the exact same voice after my father died.