Iris: Hello people! *mad manic eyes* I has hot chocolates. Num num num
Artemis: Well this took forever to write mainly because I was in charge of it *grins*
Iris: Writers block doesn't help either.
Artemis: Or extensive revision.
Iris: I suppose four A's would need a lot of work. Dang, that means this is my fault...
Artemis: So sorry if this chapter isn't up to the usual standard (I hear some people asking 'what standard?') but we both tried very hard to get it finished because we both have a new school year to prep for and we wanted to get this posted as soon as possible so ... Anyway on with the story, enjoy.
(Add note: I believe they're the voices in her head. No worries folks, it's normal. x Iris)
Bakura glanced around him quickly to make sure nobody in the immediate area was looking at him suspiciously. Adjusting his disguise Bakura continued to look around him. The street was unusually quiet today, this wasn't good. If it kept going like this he may be forced to come up with a 'distraction' to make himself less noticeable. Fortunately for him Fate was being kind to him today and provided for him a distraction. It came in the form of one Marik Sebastian Ishtar. Perhaps Fate wasn't being so kind to him today after all...
"MY EYES! THEY BURN! STOP THEM FROM BURNING! IS THIS HOW PEOPLE FEEL AFTER HUGS?"
Bakura glanced up sharply at the sound and looked around for the source of all the noise. That loud obnoxious voice could only belong to one very deranged person. Spying the source of the sound he watched in amusement as Marik came running down the footpath and then, without looking, ran across the road. Then he got run over. Bakura swiftly concluded that it wasn't fatal judging by how fast Marik was on his feet again and the awful screaming resumed. Marik glanced over in Bakura's direction and Bakura idly wondered how Marik got his hair to sit like that.
"HELP ME KITTY CAT!" Marik screamed charging towards Bakura. Bakura wondered if he would have time to hide or if he should just dive out of the way. Bakura realised he would need to learn to think faster as Marik tackle hugged him to the ground. Bakura felt vaguely disturbed as he realised Marik was nuzzling him, rather like the way a cat would.
"Who's a good Kitty Cat, now help Marik find some mind bleach."
Great, he's finally snapped Bakura thought.
Heaving himself upwards Bakura flipped Marik over before grasping his hands and pinning them above his head.
"Marik what the hell do you think you're doing?" Bakura snapped.
Marik stopped screeching for a split second, then resumed louder than ever. Those disturbing memories hadn't been repressed quite yet. Weren't they supposed to be two halves of the one soul or some mystic airy-fairy bullcrap like that? Then, technically, wasn't that narcissism? Yugi was just plain sick.
But he wasn't the one that started it, was he? One of the many voices in Marik's head decided to voice it's opinion.
How can you like one so much, but hate the other when they're both the same? Another asked curiously.
Aren't they too halves of the one soul? Aren't they both the same?
SHUT THE HELL UP! (This will be explained later)
Bakura wondered why Marik was screaming, if he could shut him up for long enough then maybe he would get some answers.
"Marik will you please shut up," Bakura growled staring at the platinum blonde.
Two minutes thirty five seconds and twenty four milliseconds later and Marik was still screaming so Bakura did the only thing he could think of to get him to shut up. One bitch slap later and Marik had finally stopped screaming. After a further two minutes or so Marik was beginning to move again and shows signs of life while Bakura massaged his hand, trying to working feeling back into it. Then he finally spoke.
"Wait a minute; you're not a kitty cat!" Marik said accusingly. Bakura slapped his face with his palm. What did he do to deserve this?
"Bakura…" Marik trailed off sounding uncertain, "why are you wearing cat ears?" Bakura grinned smugly.
"It's all part of my master disguise," Bakura said proudly. Marik raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow in confusion.
"Disguise?" He sounded rather doubtful of Bakura's idea of a disguise, "how does wearing a pair of cat ears constitute a disguise?"
"Well with my pre-existing bishiness, all I had to do was add a pair of cat ears and hey presto, instant cosplayer!"
"Right…so…why do you need a disguise anyway?" By now Marik had discovered that the footpath was actually surprisingly comfortable. He decided it was a good thing seeing as Bakura didn't look like he was going to let him go any time soon.
"Well put it this way that jewellers over there has some expensive looking necklaces and sparkly things if you know what I mean," Bakura told him. Marik just continued to look at him blankly. Bakura felt that this occasion was worthy of another face palm.
"I'm going to rob it you baka, so if you hear anything about a robbery you didn't see me here ok? Now care to explain what all that girly screaming was about?" Bakura winced as Marik started screaming again about how his eyes burnt.
'Well at least I won't have any problems with him having seen anything' Bakura thought sarcastically.
A further two minutes later and with the promise of several bottles of extra strong mind bleach Marik finally seemed to be back to his slightly snapped self.
"Fluffy, why do I feel like I've been hit by a car?" Marik questioned Bakura. Bakura grinned in response, he had no idea.
"Sooo, you going to let me get off the ground anytime soon Bakura? I mean I know you've dreamed about having me in this position for ages but really, in public?"
"What the hell are you talking about…" Bakura trailed off as he realised he still had Marik pinned down to the ground in a rather compromising position. Bakura jumped off Marik as if he'd been burned. Marik grinned, that was an interesting weakness he'd have to remember for future blackmail, no wait friendly conversation. Maybe he could use this newly discovered fact to 'persuade' Bakura to help him track down his new army of Steves. After all Bakura had once had an army of thieves although most of them had buggered off when they seen how angry Atemu was over the violation of his father's tomb...chicken shits. Honestly was it so hard to find loyal servants who didn't need to be shown the 'benefits' of agreeing to help. Such as remaining alive long enough to collect their pay-check.
Although if he wanted Bakura's help he'd have to tell him about 'The Incident' or else Bakura would refuse point blanc.
"So Bakura tell me, have you got a graphic imagination?" Bakura looked unsure of how to answer that question, so Marik just ploughed on, "if you do I have a wondrous story of what happened to me earlier that is bound to induce some lovely mental scarring."
"Do I want to know?" Bakura asked.
"Probably not but I'm going to tell you anyway so that I have at least got one kindred spirit who has gone through the same mental anguish as me." Thus Marik began his epic monologue. Unfortunately 4Kids got their hands on this scene and decided to intervene for the sake of people's sanity...
When Marik finished his soul moving chronicle which would have had even the most hard hearted git in the world moved to tears Bakura turned slowly to face Marik.
"Is that fucking it?" Bakura didn't look impressed, "You screamed like the biggest pansy in the universe, which admittedly you are, over that?"
"It was more scary if you were actually there and seen it," Marik sniffed pathetically.
"Get over it and yourself while you're at it."
"Bastard."
"Thank you, I try very hard to be so," Bakura smirked. It was official Marik decided, Bakura didn't have a heart.
"?" Marik spoke in a rush hoping that Bakura would agree before realising what he had let himself in for. Unfortunately fate wasn't smiling down on Marik today, more like frowning.
"Marik go fuck yourself, or if you can't go get Odion to do it. Ra knows he's far enough up your ass as it is anyway..."
Bakura barely had time to register the hand bag flying towards his handsome face, backed by all the brute force the tomb-keeper could muster. Which wasn't a lot judging by the fact that Bakura survived.
Marik quickly re-evaluated the situation, clearly he needed something with a little more weight behind it to inflict serious damage on Bakura. Whipping out his Sennen Rod Marik resumed his violence spree against Bakura, he was determined to at least inflict Actual Bodily Harm on Bakura before his wrath would be satisfied.
"Damn it Ishtar stop beating me up with your sex toy! I'm not gonna help you no matter how many bruises you inflict upon me. "
Damn it. Foiled again.
"Please..." Marik unveiled his ultimate weapon, The Puppy Dog Eyes Of Doom.
"No."
Fuck. Of all the people on Earth who were immune to his Puppy Dog Eyes Of Doom Bakura just had to be one of them. It was time now for his last ditch attempt. His final resort. Turning his back to Bakura Marik looked through his hand bag until he found what he was looking for. His Max Factor Ultra Lift mascara and his Max Factor Silk Gloss lip gloss in the colour Cinnamon Glow. Pulling out a mirror he checked his foundation and blusher. Flawless, as usual. Putting the required elements on his face he grimaced at the thought of what he was about to do as certain recent traumatic memories surface. Duty calls he thought.
He turned around to face Bakura, giving him his best girly look (ie his normal expression) and asked in a sickeningly sweet voice, "Fluffy...are you sure you don't want to help little old me?" He batted his eye lashes in what he hoped was an alluring manner.
"Marik, have you got something stuck in your eye?"
Whoops, not so alluring then. Or maybe Bakura's mind was blocking the makeup out, purely out of self-preservation. Or maybe he just never got propositioned. He supposed that after 5,000 years you would forget how flirting worked.
Marik was reminded of a saying he had heard Ishizu use once. Carpe diem. Seize the day...preferably by the throat. He may as well; he didn't have anything else left to lose. He'd lost his dignity a long time ago.
"I don't know, why don't you check?" Marik attempted to flirt with Bakura and edged not so subtly closer to the albino. Bakura promptly shuffled in the opposite direction. Something hard pressed up against his back.
'Oh bugger' he mentally cringed, 'I really hope that for the sake of my remaining sanity that isn't a wall behind me.'
Marik advanced towards Bakura, a wolf-like smile on his makeup covered features as he watched the former thief beginning to panic. It really was a pity the thief wasn't his type, otherwise he'd be enjoying this scenario an awful lot more. True, the Thief King had the looks and the evil tendencies, but he wasn't nearly flipped enough. It was a real shame that Yami changed so much after that elimination tournament with Kaiba, he would have been the perfect aibou*, that wonderfully evil streak that was so rare in people these days, those blood red eyes… Damn you fate, damn you. He was too busy with his damn hikari of his now. If only there was something he could do about that...oh well he'd sort that out later. For now, back to business.
"Oh Fluffy, don't be shy, it's not as if the fangirls are complaining," Marik gestured to the apparently apparted-from-nowhere-hoard of one thousand plus fangirls…Bakura lost count after five hundred.
Amazing. Like wolves to blood, the rabid creatures. Bakura turned his attention to the slightly more pressing matter of Marik pressing him against a wall. He was vaguely aware of the sound of fangirls squealing and cameras flashing. Bakura could feel his panic rising sharply. He also noticed, using his very limited knowledge of maths that the magnitude of his own panic seemed to be directly proportional to the amount of fangirls arriving every second.
Bakura looked around hastily, trying to find an escape route, but he felt his heart grow heavy with despair. Everywhere he looked all he could see was the sea of fangirls. He could also see Marik smirking at him. Bloody blonde git. He'd have to extract his revenge at a later date, maybe when he was surrounded by rabid fangirls. Bakura swore he could see drool running down some of their faces.
"Marik what will it take for you to get them to go away?" Marik mocked looking thoughtful. He loved annoying Bakura, and watching the albino get twitchy under the intense stares of the fangirls was more than a little amusing.
"Well…" Marik drew the word out as much as he could watching the twitch above Bakura's eye become more pronounced.
"Yes Marik, just spit it out," Bakura growled through clenched teeth.
"If you help me find a way to locate Steves then I will get rid of the fangirls," Marik tried his best to look sincere. He was finding it rather hard.
"Ok fine, I'll help you find your stupid Steves," Bakura sighed, "Now get rid of them please!"
"Allow me, I'll use my super special awesome fangirl distraction technique, " Marik grinned like the lunatic he was.
"Marik that's Yugi's catchphrase," Bakura deadpanned.
"Shut up Fluffy, do you want me to get rid of them or not?" Bakura hastily nodded.
"Alright girls," Marik turned to face the crowd of fangirls, "who wants some doujinshi?" Marik held said doujinshi above his head and waved it about a bit. Immediately there was a loud squeal from all the fangirls and a rather terrified looking Marik tossed the doujinshi into the crowd.
"What good does that do?" Bakura looked confused and slightly scared at the escalating levels of violence.
"It'll distract them while we escape, they'll fight over it; now move that oh-so-gorgeous ass of yours before it gets trampled on by a stampede of fangirls."
Bakura decided that for once he would heed Marik's advice. He turned tail and fled, not bothering to wait to see if Marik was following him.
"Marik..." Bakura asked a few hours later, "out of interest, what was that doujinshi you threw at them girls?"
Marik shrugged, "No idea. It said 'Thiefshipping' on the cover, but I was too scared to open it."
He didn't recognise the pairing, and breathed a sigh of relief. Bakura prepared to launch into a tirade about how big a pansy Marik was when his inner eye considered how he would have reacted. Fair dues...
"Well..." Bakura hesitated, honestly considering if he really wanted an answer. "What were you doing with that stuff anyway?"
"I-i-i-i" Marik stuttered "-it's Izushu's." He looked rather happy with himself.
Somehow, Bakura doubted it.
Marik cast his glance around, looking for something to change the subject. He struck gold. Not literally, because that would have hurt. Soft metal or not, gold tends to pack quite a punch.
"Bakura, what's that?" Marik asked, pointing at the multicoloured obscenity that stood at the roadside. If it wasn't for the fact he could still see it, Marik would have sworn he'd gone blind.
"That, my dear Tomb Keeper, is your ticket to a new army."
"It's..."
"Big, eye-catching, attention-grabbing, ingenious and bloody brilliant?"
"Gay" Marik launched into his tirade, "Seriously Bakura. It looks like the protest vehicle for gay rights. What did you do? Drive through a paint factory while it was blowing up?"
"Pretty much," Bakura said lowly before brightening up, "but still, it can go from 0 to 60 in 6 seconds."
"What's that got to do with anything?"
"Good getaway vehicle."
"Bakura, it's MULTICOLOURED! Who's gonna try and get away for anything in a van as noticeable as that thing?"
A brunette with a pair of dark sunglasses and a white waistcoat pushed in between them in a hurry.
"You can hardly expect me to get into that awful thing, can you? It's got no class or style."
"It's got plenty of class" Bakura retaliated, stroking the bodywork fondly.
"Yeah, lower class."
Bakura physically lifted Marik into the air and all but launched him into the back of the van.
"No-one insults the van and gets away with it. Now, shut up before I duct tape your mouth and chain you to the wall."
The last thing Bakura heard before the van doors slammed with a sense of finality sounded something along the lines of... "Kinky bastard". Of course, it could have been a variety of other things, but again, somehow, he doubted it.
Alternatively, the voices in his head could be conspiring against him. He really hoped so. After all, the last time was a lot of fun...
Two hours later... four bottles of vodka, a few shop windows, three water hydrants, six sets of traffic lights (yes, the pair, Bakura decided to reverse to 'leave it even') two cyclists (they survived, the bikes weren't so lucky), one near miss with a lorry (Marik screamed like the girl Bakura knew he was, Bakura screamed like the gay he always claimed to be) and a brilliant car chase provided Domino's finest equipped with three cars, a helicopter and an awful lot of bullets. Getting rid of them involved a lot of handbrake turns, a washing line, a secluded alley, Bakura cross-dressing in a miniskirt, fishnet tights, and a pair of 'killer heels' compliments of Marik. He said he stole them from Ishizu... Somehow, Bakura didn't believe him.
They disembarked with caution. Marik blinked the spots from his eyes as he came face to face with a gruff police captain.
"What the hell is going on here!" he demanded of the disorientated Egyptian.
Bakura appeared behind Marik, smiling brightly. "Hi there." Bakura twirled a bit of hair around his finger, "Lovely evening for a relaxing drive, isn't it?"
The captain had to consciously keep his mouth firmly shut. That was a relaxing drive?
"I was just showing my dear old... mother here the sights of Domino." Bakura leaned in, whispering to the officer, "She just flew in from Egypt and doesn't speak a word of English(/Japanese/whatever). Not that she was a brightest gem in the Pharaoh's treasure to start with. Too much sun, if you catch my drift."
"Give me a second and I'll explain what's happening to her. She gets confused easily."
"Screw this up," Bakura said to the Tomb Keeper in Arabic, "and I swear to the high gods I'll remove the only part of your anatomy which marks you out as a male."
"Do I really look like fifty-year-old menopausal women to you?" Marik hissed in response, ignoring the blatant threat to his already nearly non-existent masculinity. He would get Bakura back for that one later.
"Do you really want me to answer that question?" Bakura smirked.
"Yes, because if you give the response I think you're going to give I'll have a good reason to beat the living daylights out of you, and the unliving ones as well without feeling guilty. There's nothing like ending your day with being charged for GBH, purely because I can use the insanity plea. It's slightly true anyway."
"Slightly?" Bakura snorted in disbelief, letting Marik catch his breath. The captain appeared both rather confused and helpless. Why weren't these people cowering in fear already? He wasn't used to bilinguals.
Marik wasn't petrified with fear as he was too busy trying to beat Bakura repeatedly around the head. Bakura was too busy dodging while trying to keep up the 'alluring female' guise... It wasn't working.
A thought struck Bakura as he dodged Mariks' handbag again. Why hadn't it occurred to him earlier? Bakura stretched out one hand towards the captain.
"Mind Crush!"
Marik stopped his attack to look at the man jerking on the ground. "I thought only the Pharaoh could do that..." he commented, watching a rather interesting display of the more dramatic and painful convulsions the human body could go through without the spine snapping.
"Nope." Bakura replied nonchalantly, "Now, I suggest we get out of here before any more of these annoying policemen show up. They're worse than the Pharaoh's guards."
After the relatively minor encounter with the police Marik and Bakura decided that it wouldn't ruin the rest of their day.
Let the destructive rampage continue.
A further five sets of traffic lights, seven more road signs, a once rather nice display of flowers and a rather shiny motorbike later the van ground to a halt as Bakura slammed on the brakes.
"You baka!" Marik screamed hitting Bakura with his fists, "that's my motorbike you just killed!"
"Well you should have known better than leave it lying around unattended in the middle of the road!"
"It was parked, rather neatly if I do say so myself, at the side of the footpath," Marik deadpanned, "how is that anywhere near the middle of the road?"
"Well obviously you didn't park it close enough to the footpath, it was in my line of vision and that means it was in my path of destruction," Bakura defended his actions. Marik's eyebrow twitched.
'Must. Resist. Urge. To. Strangle. Him.' Marik thought as he tried to fight the overwhelming urge to harm Bakura, after all he needed his help to track down some Steves. Once that was done he could extract his revenge on the albino git. Bakura watched Marik from the corner of his eye in case Marik attempted to maim him in any way. That earlier hit from his handbag had surprisingly hurt a lot and Bakura had no wish to repeat the experience any time soon. He was surprised however when he did nothing and merely told him to pull over.
Climbing out of the van Marik made his way back to his fallen motorbike and gently lifted it upright off the ground, dusting it off and gently caressing the scratched framework. Bakura could have sworn he heard him say "My poor baby, what has he done to you?"
Once he was finished loading the motorbike in the back of the van Marik climbed into the passenger seat and proceeded to point blanc ignore Bakura. Bakura however remained on high alert, slightly worried that Marik would attack him when he wasn't expecting it.
They remained in total silence for ten whole minutes until Marik broke the silence with a profound, insightful and truly original way to break an awkward silence.
"Ok I'm bored now."
"Well that lasted long," Bakura deadpanned.
"Yeah well I…look its Yusei Fudo! After him Parker!" Marik commanded.
"Yes mi'lady," Bakura growled sarcastically.
After performing a rather nifty handbrake turn Bakura floored the accelerator and raced off after Yusei. It really helped that their crappy van had a rather nice V8 engine under the bonnet despite its appearance.
After following him down a few streets with Bakura professionally drifting round the corner (Marik wasn't sure how he managed to do it in a van this size) they both realised the streets were getting narrower and the alley Yusei had just turned down wasn't wide enough to allow the van to pass.
"Damn we've lost him!" Marik slammed his fist on the steering wheel and Bakura's eyes widened.
"Don't do that you baka you'll set the airbag off!" Marik ignored him and continued talking.
"How are we going to catch him now?"
"Well you could always follow him on your motorbike while I wait somewhere else, and maybe challenge someone to a children's card game" Bakura muttered.
"What an excellent idea fluffy!" Marik exclaimed, "To the Marik-mobile!" He clambered into the back of the van. "Hey fluffy do you think I should wear my helmet or not? I mean I know it's good for safety but it might ruin my lovely hair and it took me an hour to wash it this morning using my Loreal shampoo and conditioner then half an hour to straighten it then another two to style it and…"
"Just. Go. After. Him," Bakura ground out through gritted teeth, "He's getting away."
"Crap! Get back here Fudo!" Marik exclaimed as he drove out the back of the back of the van as the doors magically burst open in a rather dramatic fashion.
Bakura just sighed as he watched Marik race off like Evel Knievel.
Marik zoomed down the alley after Yusei but he couldn't see him. He cursed his motorbike and its pathetic engine compared to the V8. Giving up he headed back to where he had left Bakura, hoping that the thief was still there. He was, rather surprisingly.
"I lost the lightning-haired, motorbike-riding git," Marik dully informed Bakura.
"That's hardly surprising seeing as you achieved the astonishing, mind-blowing speed of about 40mph," Bakura deadpanned.
"Well at least I won't be prosecuted for speeding, unlike some people," Marik muttered under his breath.
"Indeed quite the opposite," Bakura agreed, "in fact if you went any slower not only would your precious bike have toppled over and dumped your delicate body on the cold unforgiving pavement you would also have been prosecuted for kerb crawling."
Marik's jaw dropped, for once he was speechless. Bakura smirked. That had worked better than he had anticipated.
"You…think I would…rent boys…in dark alleys," Marik stuttered unable to believe what Bakura had just said.
"Well not so much rent boys you're maybe just a bit too effeminate for them, maybe someone who's more masculine is what you would need."
Marik's jaw opened and closed in the perfect imitation of a goldfish.
"You definitely need someone more masculine around" Bakura's features took a new expression, one Marik had only ever seen while reading his 'manga' under his bed-sheets in the middle of the night.
"Someone like me," Bakura sidled closer to the Egyptian.
Marik looked at him thoughtfully for a second.
"Bakura?"
By now, the albino was close enough to whisper into his ear. "Yes Marik?" he breathed, the warm air tickling the shell of the Tomb Keeper's ear. Marik's face turned four different shades of red and was getting darker by the millisecond.
"Fuck off"
"Remind me why we're looking for a motorbike repair shop?" Bakura asked after 10 minutes of driving around in circles.
"Because you ran over my bloody bike you stupid albino kitty." Marik retaliated angrily.
"Oh yeah..."
It was at this moment that the true villain of the scene chose to strike. As the truck slowed down while Bakura attempted to get Marik to put the knives away, the dark figure in a white waistcoat threw the truck door open and barged past Marik. He waved a gun wildly.
"Get in the back!" he screamed.
Bakura smirked, both hands coming in front of his chest, ready to activate the Millennium Ring. Mere milliseconds away from sending the gunman to the Shadow Realm, Bakura was pulled, roughly, into the back of the van. Bakura gritted his teeth against the pain and the annoyance he was currently feeling towards a near hysteric blonde.
"Looking for this?" the brunette asked from the front of the vehicle. He held the Millennium Rod in his non-gun wielding hand outside down. Noting the look of relief on Marik's face, the stranger promptly opened the window and through the priceless relic out of the van. Noticing the sun deprived kid's lack of restraints, he spoke up again.
"On a scale of one to ten how much do you want me to put a bullet through your head?"
"Ummm...ten?" Marik said tentatively. That was the one that meant you really didn't want it to happen, right? The gunman hit his head off the window as Marik turned his gaze to Bakura, looking for support that at any other time when he was thinking rationally he would have realised he would never get.
"Just hurry the hell up and tie him up!"
Trembling the entire time, Marik reached for a pair of handcuffs on the floor of the van and quickly clapped them around Bakura's wrists with a terrified speed..
The gunman looked at Marik with a mixture of sympathy and pity. Normally, his inner moral code prevented him from beating up the mentally retarded, but still, desperate times called for desperate measures...
While Marik looked at Bakura for support, the gunman looked for a handy blunt object. Marik's handbag was the closest to hand. Slowly, he brought the stylish piece up to a good height and brought it crashing down on top of the Eygptians' head.
Marik crumpled to the floor. Bakura looked in shock. The gunman himself looked rather guilty as he turned the car keys and reved the engine.
Silence reigned for several, pregnant seconds.
"Thank you." Bakura cleared his throat. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that."
Bakura took a deep breath and kicked Marik again, harder than before.
"But Mr Leprecon, I don't wanna go through the rainbow. I don't want to be a fairy."
"Too late for that I'm afraid Marik, now get your sorry ass up and out of this van."
"Bakura?" Marik's hazy eyes could just about make out the albino's fluffy hair above him.
"That's right sweet cheeks, now move yourself before this entire thing blows."
"What?"
"Van plus fire equals explosion. I know you don't know much chemistry, but surely even you realise that..."
(10 minutes later)
Two solitary figures stood on the hillside, they stood out against the orange glow of the raging fire in front of them. The flames reached to the early night stars, stretching and curling into the sky's inky blackness. A rather hypnotic sight, by anyone's standards...
"That damn bastard! We were getting on really well too, and then he had to go and do this!"
Well, except maybe by Bakura's.
"When I find him, I'll, I'll..."
"Make him pay for a new van?" Marik suggested
"... Among other things, yes." Bakura mentally sighed. You don't know anything, do you?
"Well..." Marik thought about it. "Personally, I'd make sure he really suffers. First, I'd track his sorry ass down, then I'd..."
An explosion tore through the air, follow by a second and a third, making sure the world never heard the most of Marik's musings. When Bakura could actually hear again, Marik was still talking.
"... And if he can walk after that, it'll be a god-damn miracle."
So, in conclusion- Plan Two: Fail.
Iris: *blows dust off keyboard* This thing still works, after seven months? Wow...
*face pales* Seven months... *Promptly pulls out phone* Artemis! We haven't updated Stevedar in seven months! We take even longer to work than LK does.
Artemis: I know...
Iris: Huh?
Artemis: I've been telling you we should update it for six months...
Iris: Really? B-but... if we update it now, anyone reading it just might kill us.
Artemis: I know, which is why you're doing it.
Iris: Wha...? *phone line goes dead*
*looks nervous* Umm... Here's the update... and thanks for reading... and please don't kill me? There's cookies in it for you...