Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I own a tour guide name tag from my alma mater
WriteOnTime and daisy3853 are unsung heroes. In order to remedy this, I am composing a ballad to sing about their great betaing skills.
Please see the end note for an announcement.
EPOV
There was a buzzing in my head.
At first, I thought I was imagining it. After all, with the way my skull seemed to be pulsing and pounding, it hardly seemed possible that the buzzing wasn't just in my head. Then my eyelids fluttered open, and I squinted against the harsh light that filtered in through my blinds.
I grunted, throwing my arm over my eyes. The sudden movement made my stomach revolt, and I struggled against the desire to vomit for a good ten seconds.
The buzzing continued, so I squinted out into my room, finally spotting my phone on my bedside table, vibrating across the surface and threatening to tumble into a pile of dirty laundry. I grabbed it before it could move too much farther and pulled it toward my face, still struggling against the too-bright sunlight.
Two words flashed across the screen as my phone continued to buzz insistently. Alice calling...
I sighed and dropped the phone to the floor before grabbing a pillow and pressing it to my face. I never drank that much... not ever. Not since my own newbie party two years ago, at any rate. It had been so long since I had had a hangover that in that moment, I wasn't entirely convinced I was going to make it. Surely, this was what dying felt like.
Then I remembered my basic biology. My body was dehydrated, and my blood sugar was probably a little low. Food and water. I could do that. There was food in my fridge. Eggs. My stomach grumbled its agreement.
Slowly, carefully, I hoisted myself up from my mattress. The room jostled a little bit, but my stomach seemed to have decided against puking for the moment. I looked back down at my bed, suddenly sure that there was something I was forgetting about, something I had to do, but my comforter didn't seem to be in the mood for sharing secrets. I leaned against the wall and stumbled to my door.
In my living room, the feeling that there was something I had forgotten got stronger. I glanced around—nothing seemed out of place. My counters were just as we'd left them last night, sticky with spilled tequila and littered with shot glasses. The smell of it wafted towards me and made my stomach turn, and I instinctively turned my head.
My eyes fell on the rumpled fleece blanket on my couch, and everything came flying back.
My arm around Bella as we left the party. Wrapping her in my coat to stay warm. The way her lips felt against my skin...
That's when my stomach finally lost the fight. I ran for the bathroom as fast as I could, barely making it to the toilet before I heaved an entire night's worth of alcohol into the basin. Afterwards, I couldn't move. I just sat there with my cheek pressed against the cold porcelain, remembering every sick, twisted detail of the night before.
Jasper had trusted me to take her home safely. She was incredibly trashed. Hell, when we left she could barely stay upright. And then I got her back to my apartment, and instead of letting her lie down and get some rest, or bringing her some painkillers and a glass of water, I jumped her.
I put my hands all over her. Up her shirt. Pressed against her like some kind of monster, taking advantage of the fact that she could barely keep her head up straight. I hadn't even stopped to think about it, just let my own blazing need in the moment carry me away. And now, when I should be feeling like the worst kind of animal, now I couldn't help but remember how soft her skin had been, and the way she had arched her back when we kissed, how her breasts pushed into my chest and her hair covered my face...
I dry-heaved again, and then grabbed a washcloth and doused it in cold water, mopping the sweat away from my face and cleaning up the best I could. When I looked in the mirror, I almost didn't recognize the haggard, worn-out guy staring back at me. My eyes were red, my hair was sweaty and greasy, sticking together in disgusting clumps, and I had huge bags under my eyes. I was a mess.
I wandered back to my living room with my toothbrush shoved in my mouth and collapsed on my couch. The blanket mocked me, half hanging off the cushion and practically glaring at me. I turned my back on it and scrubbed my teeth and tongue, trying to get the taste of puke out of my mouth.
It took me a couple of trips between my couch and my bathroom sink to feel slightly human again. I had to keep sitting down because if I stood for longer than a couple of minutes, my head started to spin and I got queasy all over again. I was gargling with some mouthwash when someone started pounding on my door.
"Heeeeey, youuuuuu guuuuuuuys!" Alice yelled through the door. Covering my ears and spitting out the last of my mouthwash, I stumbled back past my couch and toward the door. On my way, my foot caught that damn blanket, and I tripped, toppling into my door and barely catching myself on the doorknob. I wrenched it open and glared down at Alice, who looked impossibly chipper. Jasper was standing behind her, wincing a little and holding two cups of coffee. Wordlessly, he handed me one.
"Alice, I think I'm dying, so if you could keep it down, that'd be great."
"Goonies never say die," she said seriously, waltzing past me like she owned the place. "Where's Bella?"
Grimacing, I took a swig of my coffee and choked a little. It was scalding. "Not here. And seriously, why didn't you use your key? What, last night was okay, but you'd rather pound mercilessly on my door this morning?"
She whirled to face me, her eyes passing over every corner of the place as if verifying what I had just told her. "Don't be such a baby," she said dismissively. "Where did she go? She stayed here last night, didn't she?"
I closed my eyes. "Alice, could you be a little quieter? I wasn't kidding about the dying thing."
"Fine," she sighed, lowering her voice to an exasperated stage whisper. "Where is she?"
"I don't know," I shrugged. I started to lean on my countertop, then smelled the tequila and changed my mind, going to the cupboard for a glass of water instead. "I woke up and she was gone. Her truck isn't out front anymore, either."
I knew that because on one trip from my bathroom to my couch, I changed direction halfway into my living room and peeked out the window. A horrible thought had struck me as I loaded up my toothbrush with toothpaste for the third time. What if she had staggered out in the morning and fallen on the street? What if she had crashed her truck into the side of a building or something? I had to check. Of course, she wasn't there. Light snow had fallen in the night, and there was a big clear rectangle which the body of the truck had blocked from the snow. Instead of being reassured, I started worrying that she had gotten into an accident on her way home.
I gulped down my glass of water and tried to shove thoughts of Bella out of my head. My brain was working very hard to not imagine her reaction when she woke up in my bed. Did she even remember last night? Had she been horrified? Embarrassed? Confused? I didn't know her well enough to have the answers to my questions, and I certainly wasn't going to press Alice or Jasper for their opinions.
"She's probably back at her dorm," Alice said, breaking into my thoughts. "Jasper and I were going to get breakfast at the Hop and figured you guys would need some grease in your stomachs. We can swing over and see if she's up for it."
Jasper nodded and then looked at me expectantly. "You should probably change your clothes, Edward. The 'walk of shame' look only really works on Alice."
She smacked his chest and both of them laughed, completely missing the way my face fell at the 'walk of shame' reference. I turned and hobbled toward my room, getting changed as quickly as possible. Saying no would be suspicious and might invite questions, and there was no way I wanted to discuss what had happened last night with Alice or Jasper. Unfortunately, I also didn't want to be confronted with Bella just yet. As I changed my clothes, I tried to come up with excuses for not stopping off at Bella's dorm. I came up empty.
Alice was frowning at her phone when I got back into the living room.
"Bella didn't answer," she mumbled, and I breathed a silent sigh of relief. "Well, that sucks. I wanted to gossip about the party."
"She's probably sleeping," I said quickly. "Besides, she was pretty drunk last night. I don't know how much she's going to remember. You know how that goes."
Alice nodded and slipped her phone into her purse, but Jasper gave me an odd sideways look. I struggled to keep the guilt off my face, concentrating instead on finding my keys and wallet and tucking them carefully into my pockets.
"So the two of you got home okay, huh?" Jasper asked as we walked slowly toward the Hop. "Bella didn't fall and break an ankle on the way?"
"Nope, it was completely uneventful," I muttered. I wrapped my coat tighter around myself and shoved my hands in my pockets. "We passed out right after we got back and when I woke up this morning she was gone."
"And nothing happened?" he pressed.
I shot a nervous look toward Alice, who was happily texting a few steps behind us, and then shook my head abruptly. "No. Like I said, we went straight to bed."
The double meaning behind my words made me wince, and Jasper's eyes narrowed. I bit my tongue before I could say anything else incriminating. He was always far too perceptive for his own good, and I didn't want to risk anything. Before he could say anything, Alice skipped up between us and looped her arms in our bent elbows.
"I think I want pancakes," she mused, either missing or completely ignoring the sudden tension between Jasper and me. "Oooh, or maybe an omelet. Or a burger. French fries!"
"I don't care what I eat, as long as it's hot, greasy, and guaranteed to get rid of this raging headache," I said.
A blast of hot air rushed out when we walked into the Hop, and the inviting smell of fried food and sizzling bacon hit my nose as we approached the cafe. I made a beeline for the made-to-order egg buffet, grabbing a breakfast sandwich and a couple of milk cartons in addition to my heaping plate of scrambled eggs. Just looking at it was making me feel slightly more human. If I just focused on the food and forgot about what happened last night for a little while, maybe it would be easier for me to figure out what to do next.
Alice and Jasper were still waiting for their food when I collapsed into a chair at a little table near the wall. My fork was halfway to my mouth when I was interrupted by a shrill voice.
"Edward!" I looked up and froze. Lauren was standing in front of my table, tray in hand, grinning at me. She was still wearing the glittery little tank top she had on at the party last night, but instead of the mini-skirt she had originally paired it with, she was wrapped in a low-hanging pair of grey sweat pants. Her eye makeup looked caked on, and her blonde hair was gathered in a low, sloppy side ponytail. Inexplicably, instead of boots, she wore a pair of bright pink flip-flops. "Isn't this a nice surprise?"
Before I could do more than stare at her, open-mouthed, she dropped her tray down across from me and took a seat. "Oh my God, I had so much fun last night. I had no idea the tour guides were so crazy! I mean, you hear about the parties that the basketball players throw and you think, wow, that must be totally insane, but—"
I tuned her out, staring around the room desperately looking for my friends. I spotted Alice after a minute, weaving her way between crowds of students in pajamas and winter coats. I half-stood and waved frantically. "Alice! Over here!"
Lauren stopped talking and looked a little miffed that I was clearly so much more focused on another girl. "Edward, are you even listening to me?"
"Yeah, um, basketball players," I mumbled, watching as Alice gave Lauren an amused once-over.
"Oh, hi, Lauren," Alice said sweetly, setting her tray down. "Did you have a good time last night? I lost track of you after you and Jessica finished off that tray of Jell-O shots."
Lauren turned a little green. "I don't think I'm going to be able to eat Jell-O ever again. Or peaches. God, whoever thought pairing peach schnapps with red Jell-O was a good idea should be dragged out into the street and shot."
"I think Rose made those," Alice said. "Sounds like something she'd do."
Lauren shuddered delicately and took a swig of her orange juice. "Gross. At least she's better at scheduling than she is at mixing drinks." She grinned at me and winked. I raised an eyebrow, totally thrown by her transition.
"Um...what?"
"My first tour, silly!" she exclaimed. "You and I are going to be tour buddies on Thursday. You can show me all your secrets." Her lips pouted out flirtatiously, and she fluttered her crusty eyelashes at me.
"Sounds like fun, Edward!" Jasper said, appearing just in time to get the full effect of Lauren's flirty face. "You know," he said to Lauren, "Edward's always talking about how he wants to be a mentor, take someone under his wing and share the tricks of the trade he's picked up before he graduates."
I glared at him from behind Lauren's head, slicing my hand underneath my chin sharply to get him to cut it out. Alice looked like she couldn't decide whether to laugh or be horrified that Jasper was encouraging Lauren's behavior. She settled for snickering behind her bagel and cream cheese and shaking her head sternly.
For the rest of the meal, Lauren wouldn't shut up. She prattled on about the professors we had together and how much she already loved working with me. She gabbed about the stupid things people did at the party last night, the stupid things she did at the party last night, and how she was sure we were going to be such a great team. Every time she slowed down, Jasper would butt in with some kind of encouraging remark. I couldn't figure out what his deal was. Normally, he was very perceptive about knowing when and how to help me out in situations like this. When she mentioned stopping in at the office to make sure that Rosalie kept scheduling us together for tours, I knew it was time to go.
"Okay! Well, I'm full. Alice? Jasper? Did you still want to come with me to... um... to the bookstore?"
Alice took pity on me and nodded swiftly, gathering her purse and her jacket in one fell swoop and tugging Jasper up with her. "Absolutely. See you later, Lauren!"
We were out of there too fast for her to attempt to follow us, and I speed-walked until we were at least two blocks away before slowing down and shoving Jasper hard.
"What the hell, man? I've always wanted to be a mentor? Throw me under the bus, why don't you?"
"I was only having some fun with you," Jasper said casually. There was something forced about the way he said it, almost like there was something simmering just below the surface. Alice was staring at both of us, eyes wide in confusion. "I've heard all about Lauren from Bella, and I guess I wanted to see if she was really as ridiculous as she sounded."
"Oh, honey, I could have told you that," Alice laughed, apparently fooled by his act. I had noticed the way his eyes tightened a little when he said Bella's name. His little show in the Hop had something to do with her. "Lauren's been all over poor Edward since day one, and I saw her making out with at least two other guides last night at the party. I can't believe you missed her; she was putting on quite a show. That girl is a hot mess."
We had arrived back at my apartment, so I let them in, trying to figure out the best way to get Jasper alone. I wasn't too upset about the Lauren thing, but I had a bad feeling that there was something brewing that had nothing to do with her sad attempts at seduction. My suspicions were confirmed when Alice ducked into my bathroom.
"Alright, cowboy," Jasper said softly, "now you can tell me exactly what happened with Bella last night."
I opened my mouth, but before I could get a word out he interrupted me. "And don't tell me nothing happened. Bullshit."
I sighed and scrubbed my hands over my jaw, closing my eyes for a second in an effort to calm myself down. It didn't help, and when I opened my eyes, Jasper was staring me down with a look of steely determination.
"Okay, a little more than nothing happened," I finally admitted. I grabbed my empty water glass from the morning and refilled it, buying myself some time.
"How much more?" he persisted in a low voice, glancing toward the bathroom. "I don't want to involve Alice in this, because you know she'd flip out, but you have to give me something here, man. I don't want to believe the worst, but right now you're not giving me much choice."
I glared at him. "The worst? What, like I'm some kind of roofie-slinging frat boy? Come on, Jasper. Give me some credit. I thought we were friends."
"Then don't stand there and lie to me," he whispered harshly. "Just tell the truth."
"Fine!" I hissed. "We made out, okay? We came back to my apartment and I was just trying to get her a blanket and then we were kissing, and touching, and I don't know... it got out of hand, I guess?" My stomach rolled and twisted again, and I leaned back against my fridge, one hand covering my eyes, the other rooted in my hair. "I don't know what to do."
"It got out of hand," Jasper repeated slowly. His eyebrows shot up. "You didn't..."
"What? No! I swear, I didn't even take off my socks," I said sharply. "We were really drunk; that's it. I'm kind of hoping she doesn't even remember it happened. Not one of my best moments."
He gave a humorless laugh and rolled his eyes. "You think?"
When I didn't answer, he sighed. "Look, Edward, I'm not going to pretend like I have all the answers. I'm pretty sure what happened last night wasn't entirely your fault. But you need to man up. Talk to Bella about it and make sure she's okay. She deserves that much."
"I totally agree," I said quickly. "It's just... God, I don't know. How do I even start that conversation?"
"Start what conversation?" Alice said as she walked into the kitchen.
"Uh...trying to figure out how to get Lauren off my case," I answered, thinking quickly. "You know, with us working together on tours and everything, I don't want it to be weird and uncomfortable. I'm trying to figure out what to say to get her to leave me alone. Or at least stop with the heavy petting."
She snorted. "Well, you can try to let her down gently, but I'm guessing even blunt, flat-out rejection isn't going to stop that crazy train. You may just have to grin and bear it."
"Right," I said glumly.
~||x||~
Classes started up for the semester on Monday, and I wasn't scheduled to work until Thursday, so I steered clear of McNutt in the meantime. I knew that Bella worked Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday, because I had memorized her schedule, creepy stalker that I was.
I had thought about what Jasper said all day on Sunday, but try as I might, I couldn't come up with the right words. I wanted to feel out the situation first... find out what she remembered, what she thought, if she hated me or thought I was scum. On the off-chance she didn't remember, I didn't want to embarrass myself by apologizing. If she didn't think I was a jerk already, I didn't want to invite trouble.
Of course, most of me didn't want to have the conversation at all, so I didn't feel bad about completely avoiding any place where I might run into her. I ate almost all of my meals at home or in various classrooms in the science buildings. Since she was a creative writing major, and since I had it on good authority that she had finished up all of her science general education credits, I knew I could hide myself there without too much effort. I didn't go to the library or wander near any of the more crowded campus hang-out spots. All in all, I thought I was being pretty clever.
But with all my cleverness, I couldn't avoid her 100 percent of the time. For one thing, I thought about her almost constantly. I had imaginary conversations with her, trying to strategize what exactly I would say when I saw her next. More than once I was startled out of my musings by a professor or classmate, completely unaware that I had been spacing out for the last five minutes. It was a good thing that I brought a voice recorder to all of my important classes, because my notes that week were absolutely abysmal.
Then there was the other reason I couldn't avoid her: her tours. Somehow, I managed to see her on campus with tour groups on both Monday and Tuesday. I didn't say anything or call attention to myself in any way, but it was hard not to stare when I saw her. For one thing, both times I saw her, she was partnered with Jacob, which made me scowl. I refused to delve too deeply into why I was scowling—I just knew that I didn't like the natural way they seemed to work together, the easy give and take between them as they spoke, and the way her face lit up as she laughed and talked with him and the people in their group.
And that was the other thing that made me stare. I couldn't help but watch her when she spoke. Even at a distance, when I couldn't hear a word she was saying, her presence was magnetic. It wasn't that she was particularly bubbly, like Alice, or overly charismatic, like Jacob. She was just...Bella. Warm, inviting, quietly charming.
Seeing her like that was usually all it took to have me reliving that night. No matter how many times I told myself it was wrong, I couldn't help but remember the way the smooth skin of her calves felt under my hands, and the way her lips fit perfectly against mine. When my thoughts started going down that path, I knew I had to leave, usually holding a book in front of my crotch as I fled.
By Thursday, I was a wreck. I hadn't been sleeping well, owing mostly to my constant preoccupation and an ever-increasing pile of reading and lab work. To top it off, Jasper had caught me on my way to microbiology on Wednesday and grilled me about talking to Bella. When I admitted that I hadn't seen her yet, he accused me of avoiding her and threatened me with Alice again. I absolutely did not want Alice involved in this mess, and he knew it. I only got him to stop pestering me when I promised to speak to Bella on Thursday, no matter what. Gone was the zen-like Jasper I knew. He had obviously picked up new interrogation and guilt trip techniques from his girlfriend.
Because I had been so heavily focused on Bella, I had completely forgotten about my conversation with Lauren at the Hop. It all came rushing back the second I stepped into the tour guide office on Thursday afternoon. I barely got my backpack off before she was all over me, clutching my arm and giggling about something. I stared at her in disbelief; even Alice didn't just grab me like that. Shaking my arm gently, I dislodged her and took my coat off, throwing it over the back of Rosalie's desk chair. She wasn't the least bit dissuaded.
"I've been working really hard to get my facts straight, and I can't wait to see you in action," she purred, creeping closer to me again.
"Right, well, um..." I mumbled incoherently, not really sure how to respond. I finally settled on, "I'm sure you'll be great."
"You really think so, Edward? Your opinion means so much to me. I don't want to disappoint you."
"Oh, you shouldn't really be worrying about my opinion." I backed away from her again, trying to sneak toward the door. There were a couple of coats already hanging in various places around the room, which meant that the rest of the guides assigned to this tour were already here, and probably waiting in the back of the room where the admissions info session was wrapping up. I counted four backpacks on the floor, including mine, which meant that Bella was here too. My throat constricted and I gulped nervously. "We should really get going, we'll be late."
I slung my nametag around my neck and grabbed one of the spare Dartmouth-green coats that someone had forgotten to put away after their morning tour. It was a little too big, but we actually were running a little behind, and I didn't have time to run to the coat closet and root through it for the right size.
I motored to the admissions session, ignoring the shuffling sounds Lauren made as she struggled to catch up. When I turned the final corner, I stopped dead. Bella was scheduled to be buddied up with Rosalie. I knew that because I had been staring at that damn schedule for four days straight. But it definitely wasn't Rosalie who was standing next to Bella in the doorway.
"Jacob? What are you doing here?"
He turned slowly, a look of amused indifference on his smug face. "Working, Masen. What else would I be doing?"
Bella glanced at me, her hair swinging around her shoulders and covering her face like a curtain as she turned her attention back to the darkened room. She didn't even say hello. My heart plummeted.
"I thought Rosalie was scheduled for this slot," I persisted, snapping my gloves on and adjusting my hat. He shrugged.
"I don't know. I think a specialty tour came up. I was in the office at the time, and she asked if I could squeeze in another shift. And I couldn't turn down the opportunity to work with my new favorite guide."
He winked at Bella and she looked up at him, her hair pushed back just far enough so that I could see the smile on her lips.
"I know who my favorite guide is," Lauren piped up, lacing her arm through mine. I stared down at her in horror, unable to stop her as she latched on with all her strength. Bella looked at me then, of course, because I desperately wanted her to go back to watching the admissions session. The lights had come back on, and the admissions counselor was answering questions.
"We're up," she mumbled, grasping the door firmly and walking inside before I could do more than gasp like a fish out of water.
The tour was a nightmare. Lauren may have been brushing up on her facts, but she still spent more time staring helplessly than she did giving out information. By the last few stops, I was at my wit's end.
"The ice and snow may seem a bit daunting if you're not used to it, but it can be a lot of fun, right, Lauren?"
She gave me a blank look. I sighed.
"The Winter Carnival is always a blast," I continued, trying to keep my smile convincing. "There are ski races, live bands, free food, and every year ,students do a polar bear swim down at Occom Pond. This year, it's in February."
"Polar bear swim?" squeaked a tiny girl with masses of curly, brown hair. "Why would you do that?"
"Tradition," I said with a wink. "Now if you folks will just follow me across the edge of the Green, we'll make our way to the last stop of the tour. Here's a fun fact for you: Dartmouth's school color is green because it was the only decent color not taken by another Ivy League college!" I strolled backwards, keeping my eyes on the group and shouting a little to be heard. "Harvard had crimson, Yale had blue, and so on. Dartmouth students voted on green as the school color in 1866 because it was the only good color left."
That story always got a few stray chuckles, and this time was no exception. I was scanning the group to make sure we still had everyone when Lauren, who was sticking close to my side despite explicit instructions to mingle with our group, got a little too close. Her foot swept under mine and I stumbled. I tried to get purchase with my other foot, but a patch of ice sent me flying backwards. I landed on my right side, hip and shoulder banging painfully on the sidewalk.
For a moment, I just laid there groaning. Then Lauren was by my side, along with one of the fathers from our group.
"You alright there, son?" he asked kindly. I opened my eyes, only to see Bella and Jacob making their way across the Green towards us. Bella looked worried, but Jacob seemed to be holding in laughter. I couldn't blame him, I suppose. Falling was a rookie mistake.
"I think so," I mumbled, propping myself up slowly on one arm. My elbow buckled and I collapsed again, narrowly missing smacking the back of my head on the cement. "Ow."
"I'm so sorry, Edward," Lauren breathed, flapping her hands frantically in my face. "It was all my fault. Does it hurt? Do you have a concussion?"
"A concussion?" Jacob said loudly. I winced. "That sounds serious, dude. Better get that checked out."
Now both our groups were standing around me, at least thirty people staring down at me as I lay incapacitated on the frozen ground.
"I'm okay. It's really just my pride that's injured," I joked weakly. I sat up again, more slowly this time, and groaned. It felt like I had scraped up my entire side, and I was sure my back would be black and blue by the next morning.
"Why don't I take Edward back to the office while you two finish up?" Bella asked quietly. She was speaking to Jacob but looking at me, her eyes searching my face questioningly. I nodded gratefully, ignoring Lauren's whimper of protest.
"Thanks, Bella." The man squatting next to me helped me stand, and she tucked her arm around my waist. "You know that if I fall, I'm taking us both with me, right?"
"Now who's terminally clumsy?" she laughed, taking a few experimental steps. I threw my arm around her shoulder and hobbled after her, finding relief in the sound of her voice. There was definitely something wrong with me.
I gave an apologetic wave to my tour group and Lauren, raised my eyebrows at Jacob and smiled victoriously, then turned and focused on the girl who was leading me back to the office. I bent my head slightly under the pretense of needing to lean on her. Really, I was trying to get a better view of her face. I was rewarded with a view of half of her smile. She looked up at me and raised an eyebrow, and I felt the overwhelming urge to say something, anything. Unfortunately, after all those imagined conversations, I still had no clue how to talk to her about Saturday night. I was stuck.
"So," she said cheerily. "I haven't, uh, really seen you around. Busy first week?"
"Yes! School. You know, lots of classes this semester," I said quickly, jumping on her conversation topic. "Most of my classes are labs, too, so I've been really slammed right away."
"Oh, that sucks. Were you able to get your first assignments done? You know, before Monday?"
Her shoulders seemed to tense a little under my arm, but she sounded relaxed enough. I barked a short laugh.
"I was lucky that I got most of it done before the party. I was so hung-over the next day, I could barely move." The words flew out of my mouth without thought, and I almost froze in panic. I hadn't meant to bring up the party so quickly. I had stopped worrying about it for one second because I was grateful to be having a normal conversation with her...and it just popped out. I held my breath and waited for her response.
"Me too," she said quietly. "I'm sorry I just left your apartment like that, but I really wanted to sleep in my own bed, you know?"
"No problem," I answered, just as quietly. There was a pause, and then, "What time did you leave? I didn't... hear you get up."
I was tiptoeing around the subject, hoping she would give me a clue. Her blank expression never changed as she shrugged.
"I'm not sure exactly. To be honest, I was a little disoriented. Thank you for letting me crash, it was really nice of you to share your bed like that. It's a good thing you've got such a big mattress, I'm kind of a kicker."
"Yeah, well, you're lucky I didn't smush you in my sleep," I joked weakly. "I usually sleep cuddled up to whatever's closest, pillow or person. Emmett almost beat me up on a camping trip our freshman year because I tried to spoon him in the middle of the night."
She snorted, a deceptively cute sound, and then said, "I don't usually black out, so that was a little scary. Thanks for making sure I was okay."
"You... you blacked out?" I couldn't define the feeling that swooped down on me, but it wasn't good. She didn't remember. There had been a tiny part of me that was hoping, wishing, that maybe she remembered what had happened and was glad about it. Of course, that part was vastly overshadowed by the part of me that was beating itself up for making out with a practically-unconscious girl, no matter how pretty, or interesting, or smart she may be sober. Just because she didn't kiss like she was practically-unconscious didn't mean it wasn't wrong.
"I know, it's embarrassing." Her light laugh interrupted my self-flagellation. "I'm never drinking with Alice again." She held the door open for me. Together we made our way to the tiny office, stripping out of our coats as we walked. Bella had to help me with my right sleeve, and my breath hitched a little when she pressed up against me and pulled it off my arm.
I shrugged into my own coat and grabbed my backpack, grateful that there was only one textbook in it at the moment.
"Hey," Bella said softly. I looked up at her, wrapped in her winter clothes and halfway out the door. She smiled. "You find a walk-in clinic and get yourself checked out, okay?"
I nodded. "Thanks for making sure I was okay," I said, echoing her words from earlier. She looked down at her feet and blushed for the first time.
"See ya," she mumbled, taking off without looking back.
I stared after her for several long minutes. The only things I could focus on were the throbbing pain radiating from my hip and shoulder and the sudden, inexplicable feeling that I had just lost something.
A/N: Hang with me kids. I promised short and fluffy. Conflict is inevitable. Without it, life would be boring.
I've never been in a girl fight. I'm pretty sure I couldn't take anybody. This week's question: what's the most embarrassing public wipe-out you've ever had?
A short announcement! Fandom Gives Back (Eclipse edition) begins this evening, June 26, at 11:59 EST. It's an auction, and they have all kinds of awesome donations and merchandise for sale to benefit Alex's Lemonade Stand, which is a charity supporting childhood cancer research. You can learn more about Alex's Lemonade Stand here: http:/www(dot)alexslemonade(dot)org/. As part of the auction, many authors are putting themselves up on the block, myself included. I'm auctioning off a oneshot, and the winner gets to pick their prompt! Canon, AU, or AH, it doesn't matter. I won't write noncanon pairings or the usual icky stuff (rape, incest, adultery), but I'm game for literally anything else you can come up with. The bidding starts pretty low, so come and check it out :)
FGB web site: www(dot)thefandomgivesback(dot)com
My auction thread: http:/www(dot)thefandomgivesback(dot)com/browse(dot)php?id=476
My discussion thread: http:/www(dot)thefandomgivesback(dot)com/forum/viewtopic(dot)php?f=13&t=189