Chapter 2: Shades of Grey
As they approached Cousland Castle on horseback, Nathaniel Howe marveled at his present circumstances.
After all that, he thought, I'm basically back where I started.
How many times had he traveled this exact route before, from Amaranthine to Highever? A dozen? Possibly more. He still recognized the landmarks. The giant spruce tree at the fork in the road that had been split by lightening a decade earlier. The wooden bridge over the stream that had been Delilah's favorite spot for Cousland Castle hide-and-seek.
Teyrn Cousland had even offered to squire Nathaniel at Highever, but the Arl had politely declined. Now Nathaniel understood why.
Elissa had been quiet for a while, and Nathaniel wondered if she was thinking the same thing.
"Now that we're almost to the castle, and I can't well turn around and go back to Amaranthine in a righteous fury, would you mind telling what we're doing here?" he asked, half-playfully.
But her face was grave. "We need to do a Joining."
Now Nathaniel was concerned. "Whose Joining?"
"You had better just see for yourself."
"She's having nightmares, but she's alive," Fergus reported, coming out of Cauthrien's room.
"She'll get used to them; we all do," Nathaniel replied.
Fergus pointedly ignored him. Despite Elissa's assurances and entreaties, the Teyrn did not share the trust his sister placed in a Howe. Nathaniel smarted, but found it hard to blame the man completely. Cousland Castle was an empty shell of the happy place he remembered, and that was his father's fault.
The babe in Elissa's arms started to mewl, and she bounced him and pressed him to her chest, attempting to comfort him, to no avail. Fergus held out his arms and she passed the swaddled bundle on; in her brother's arms, the child quieted. Fergus had always been good with children.
"Are you alright with this?" she asked him, honestly worried that she had finally asked too much of him.
He looked fondly at the child in his arms. "I can think of worse things than having a little boy running around this place."
She smiled, relieved.
Fergus stood and went to Cauthrien's door with the babe. "I should take him to her. Let him be with her, while he can."
The sadness in her brother's voice nearly choked Elissa, reminding her painfully of what exactly she was doing. As the door closed behind Fergus, she turned to Nathaniel, hopeful that he wouldn't see the tears welling up in her eyes.
"Could you manage here for a while? I need to go for a walk."
Without waiting for the answer, she bolted down the hallway and out of sight.