Rookie
Chapter Five - Day Five
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Saturday Spetember 12th
Day Five - Afternoon
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That sound was ringing through the room once more. Axel's sound. Axel ... Axel was calling him. For the fourth time in three minutes.
"Just go away, man. Please."
As if on command, the music ended. Roxas breathed in a sigh of relief, not releasing it until he was sure the beat wouldn't go back to annoying him. He sat for five minutes, relishing the silence. He hauled his book bag closer to him, digging in to pull out a textbook that contained his homework. The pencil shook in his grasp.
He had refused Zexion's offer to hang out over the weekend and neither Pence nor Hayner invited him to join in with them - even though he would have refused that offer as well. He just wanted to be left alone for the first time in a week. Head lolling back to lean against the wall, the blonde sighed. It was only a week he had lived through and he had already almost been raped twice, had his first kiss, found two people that just wanted to get into his pants (he had deduced that Seifer only wanted him to get back at Axel.), lost his two best friends while making three more new ones. Was Axel a friend already? He certainly seemed like it. Was that a good thing?
So baby-
Maybe it was too much of a good thing. Axel didn't know when to quit. Which would be a good thing if he ever got into trouble. But he didn't plan on getting into trouble. Not again.
Another ring, this time a different theme. Hayner. Roxas picked his phone up from beside him, glancing at the screen to confirm his suspicions.
"What?"
"Whoa, someone's grumpy.What's up, man?"
"Homework."
"Bummer. So, you home then?"
"Hence the homework."
"Not spending the day with Zexion?"
"No."
"Okay. Just wondering. Bye."
Roxas didn't have time to reply before the line went dead. "Asshole," he hissed, tossing the annoying device down by his feet. Picking his pencil up, he decided to try again.
The next disturbance came after ten minutes of glaring off into space after getting stuck on the last math question. A voice. A female voice. His mother. Speaking ... coming closer. A knock on his door.
"What?" he called, not bothering to cover the irritation in his voice.
"Don't give me that attitude, mister. You have a guest."
"Who is it?"
The woman opened the door, not waiting for Roxas' plea of privacy. Behind his mother stood a rather nervously confident teen with a small 'Hi-I'm-you're-kid's-date-for-the-prom-and-this-is-my-first-time-meeting-you' smile. Completely breathtaking.
"Go away, Axel," Roxas pouted, gripping the blankets below him as though they would be able to suck him up.
"Now, angel, that's no way to talk to a guest. Be nice." It was painfully obvious that Roxas' mother had been won over by Axel's charm with his fake smile and not-too-brash voice.
"It's okay, ma'am. Honestly, I am used to so much worse from your son." Another flash of that smile and the woman beamed, happy that her son had made a new friend, before bustling off to finish what she had been doing. The 'nice guy' charade was dropped the second that she disappeared. "What the hell, Roxas? I've been calling you, you know!"
"How'd you find out where I live?"
"What was with you yesterday?!"
"What are you doing here?"
"How long have you really been going out with that prick?"
"Don't call my boyfriend a prick!"
"Then start answering some of my questions!"
"You answer mine!"
The two shared a glare before Axel moved in closer, closing the door behind him to drown out their argument. Roxas pulled his book bag up to his chest, trying to hide the fact that he was still only in his boxers on a lazy Saturday afternoon. Noticing this quick flurry of motion, Axel's eyes grew wide for a moment before he calmed. "Can you put some clothes on, please? I'd rather not risk the chance of my jumping you here in the middle of your bedroom."
"You would really do such a thing?"
"Would you put it past me?"
Barely having to think about the answer, Roxas' legs squirmed to get back under the covers of his warm bed. "Fine. Turn around."
"What a way to ruin the mood."
"What do you mean, jerk? What mood?!" Roxas shot at the redhead as he picked up his jeans from the day before, snatching them from the foot of his bed. It took him only a second more to grab a shirt and haul it on over his spikes but it was a second too long for the redhead to take. A smirk lined his features as he turned.
"Well, we were just kinda in the middle of a serious argument when I found out you were almost naked."
"And I bet you really would have liked it better if I stayed that way."
"Nah. If you did, I wouldn't be able to talk to you about what I came here to talk to you about. So, sit back, kid, and talk to me."
Roxas did as he was told, a fire burning in his stomach. A moment of not-so-awkward silence pressed over them, Axel moving over to stare out the window. "Well?"
"What am I supposed to say? You barge into my room and just expect me to talk to you."
"Fine, I'll just ask you questions. All you have to do is answer, deal?"
"Nope. What if I don't want to answer?"
"Then I'll end up getting frustrated."
"Is that a threat?"
"I suppose it would be."
Roxas huffed, crossing his arms firmly over his chest. Hearing the noise of complaint, Axel turned to face the blonde, smirking. But the smirk slipped from his face as he forced himself back onto the topic at hand.
"What happened yesterday? After school. I heard you, you know. I just figured you would yell at me if I went anywhere near you. Why were you crying?"
Cheeks flushed pink at the thought of the redhead overhearing him in the stairs and Roxas lowered his gaze. "I-I ... You weren't suppose to hear that."
"But I did and now I'm worried about you."
"Don't be. I don't want your pity."
"What would I have to pity you about?"
He realized his slip-up too late. Axel was on the edge of the bed, moving ever closer to him. He couldn't hold back the seduction in his voice even though it was apparent he was trying. "What could I possibly have to pity you about? It's not like you get beat by your father, have failing grades, lost your mom or get threatened every day since you were twelve. You just have a rapist boyfriend and a stalker."
"Y-You ... Your dad ... Your mom ..."
"Oh, lighten up, kid. I'm just saying that things could be worse. So much worse. Be glad that you just have boy troubles. That's all that's wrong, right? Me and that creep?"
"And Seifer and Hayner and Pence."
"Tell them I say thanks. Hayner and Pence, that is."
Roxas narrowed his eyes, pressing himself farther back into his wall as Axel inched closer, obviously having trouble resisting the urge to kiss the blonde right then and there. Forcing the elder teen back, Roxas glared.
"Why do you wanna thank them?"
"That's how I knew where you lived, Rox-as. They told me."
"Bastards."
A pout etched itself on those normally smirking lips. "What, you don't want to spend time with me?"
"No, not really."
"Stop being so cold, Rox. It's getting old. No one resists me. Everyone loves me."
"Guess I can't be called everyone then."
"What if I made you love me?"
Fingers had moved their way up to the blonde's chin, lifting it in just the right way to make the younger teen look stunning. Axel's hips moved from side to side slowly, shifting his weight from knee to knee. Whimpering, Roxas tried to pull away from the redhead who almost looked ready to pounce.
"So, how long have you two been going out, really? Do you even love him? I doubt it since you let me kiss you."
"I didn't have much choice in the matter! It's not like you care what I say, really!"
"Don't I? I would be in your pants right now if I didn't care. I wouldn't keep trying if I didn't care."
The redhead began to move forward, appearing to be about to press their lips together once more before forcing himself back. His fingers trailed against Roxas' chin, causing the teen to tremble, his eyes closing and his head tilting to the touch despite himself.
"Rox? How long have you two been going out?"
"Y-Yesterday. He asked me out and I agreed. Just so you would maybe leave me alone. But now I regret it." His words jumbled out in a rush.
Unable to stop himself, Roxas shoved forward into the redhead, knowing he had already hurt the elder teen and trying to make up for it. He shoved his nose into the crook of Axel's neck. "I screwed up, didn't I?" He didn't know what he was doing. Roxas was still in shock that he had a boyfriend, a stalker and someone who seemed to really care about him after less than a week. He was shocked that Axel was sitting there on his bed, leaning away from him. Shocked that his mother had allowed the 'stranger' into the house. Most of all, Roxas was shocked at the fiery, sick-feeling causing his stomach to churn.
"So, you haven't even been going out with him all that long? And you wouldn't love him? But I'm gonna take that as you saying that you hate my guts, right? You would rather it if I were to leave, right?"
"I never said that! I didn't say that, Axel. I didn't."
"But that's what you meant, right?"
"No!"
"What did you mean then?"
Axel was hurt and Roxas could feel that. He stopped trying to get close to the redhead as the elder teen pulled farther away. Slipping from the bed, Axel hugged his arms close to him. The blonde shifted uncomfortably in the dreaded silence.
"I ... I don't know. You ... I'm sorry, Axel. I just wanted you to leave me alone."
"So now you've put yourself in a relationship that you obviously don't want to be in?"
"What makes you say that?! Why would you think that I don't want to be with him?!"
"You are only going out with him because I was being a pest. Now I'm worried for you. I saw you yesterday. And you complain that all I wanna do is get into your pants."
"But it's different with him!"
Axel rolled emerald orbs. "Of course. What's so different, hmm?"
"He .. I've known him since I was little."
"You really are so innocent, Roxas."
A shudder ran over the blonde and the redhead turned for the door. "D-Don't go, Axel."
"Pah, what? You want me to stay? That's different. Normally you can't wait for me to leave."
"Well, I changed my mind. I don't feel like being alone right now." Roxas huffed, feeling his insides squirm. He wasn't himself at the moment. What he was saying ... he didn't mean it, did he? Did he really want the redhead to stay here? Just the two of them? Alone?
"You really confuse me, Roxas. One minute you would rather me end up dead and then the next you want me to stay by your side, possibly holding you so you feel safe. And you say I move fast."
"You think you're confused? Try being in my position right now! I've lost my two best friends because of some guy I barely even know, was almost raped because someone wanted to get back at the guy I barely know, I basically had a gun pointed at me, had my first kiss and found some really awesome new friends, even though I had to get a rapist boyfriend to get away from one of them. You think you're confused?! Every time I even think about you, I get so flustered that I can't think straight. But I don't want to think about you like that because I don't know you. And so far all you've brought is chaos and drama and sick feelings and bad things and I don't know what to do anymore and it's only been four days!"
The redhead moved slightly, a small twitch, backing away from the pained blonde as though he were about to strike. For all Axel knew, the shaking blonde could very well just come straight over and send him flailing backward with one hit. So he decided not to press his luck. He stumbled back on a discarded pair of boxers that had been flung over toward the clothes hamper and he lost his footing. With a thud and a moan, an arch of the back and a small, barely audible yelp, Axel shut his eyes tightly from pain as he landed on the floor, head crashing back from his momentum, directly into the corner of a large, burgundy armchair.
"Ow."
Roxas shot to the edge of the bed, having just witnessed the epic stumble. Axel chuckled softly at the concerned expression on the smaller teen's face, cringing as he felt his head throb when he tried to righten himself.
"Are you okay?! You don't look okay. Dear God, don't sue us! It was your own fault! You weren't watching where you were going! Oh God, Axel!"
"You're so religious, little buddy. Slightly unnerving. Don't worry. I'm fine. It was all my fault. I'm just a klutz, I guess."
"Go be a klutz somewhere else then!"
"Make up your mind! Want me to stay or leave? Hmm, Rox-as? You'll need to make up your mind soon."
"I just don't want to have to worry about you! That scared me, you know!"
"Aww," Axel cooed, laughing again but cringing as his head flared in pain. "Roxybabe cares about me!"
"Were you not listening to anything I said in that rant?"
"Of course. I hang on your every word, babe."
Axel enjoyed the color that was flooding the younger boy's cheeks every time he called him 'babe'. It made him laugh. Which would just make him cringe, rubbing his head in an attempt to stop the pain.
"Then no more getting hurt." Roxas sighed. He didn't want to care about Axel but he knew that it was enevitable.
"I should say the same to you!"
"But I'm not hurt."
"Emotionally, you are. That much is a given. I can tell that you are so fragile, kid. I don't want you to get hurt, 'cause I care about you. But you're putting yourself through hell. You're doing that to yourself too. You know, if you had of just let me have you Tuesday, I wouldn't be sitting here right now. I would have already moved on. But -"
"What the hell, man?!" Roxas spat, jumping up onto his hands and knees to tower over the still-sitting-in-pain redhead. Anger was clearly spilled over his features.
"I wouldn't have gotten to know this amazing side of you. I'm really glad that you've resisted my charm. I'm glad I got to know you."
"You don't know me!"
"Okay, okay, I don't know you. Just don't yell at me, please. Bring back bad memories that you really don't need to know about. Just lay back down. Please, Rox? I'll answer any sort of question you ask if you would just lay the hell back down."
There was something new in Axel's voice; fear. Barely noticeable, but Roxas felt as though his dominating stature above the redhead was unnerving him, scaring him, possibly bringing hurt and pain and suffering back up from the past. Which made Roxas think of Seifer. A chill ran over his spine as he allowed himself to flatten out, his legs still kicking up behind him, his fingertips gripping the hard steal at the bottom of his bed.
"Better?" It wasn't a snotty response. It was an honest question. Axel nodded, relaxing. The blonde hadn't even noticed the tension that had filled the redhead's muscles when he had loomed overhead.
"'Kay. What happened with you and Seifer that made you two hate each other so much?"
Another cringe, this time from a stabbing pain in his heart. Axel closed his eyes and shook slightly, still leaning against the chair. "That's something I'll tell you some other day."
"Why not now?"
"Because. It's still too early for me to be saying something like that, Roxas."
Roxas bit his lip at the normality of his name. 'No more pressing the subject' the anti-tang of the word was known to mean already to the blonde. It meant Axel meant business, completely serious. The blonde dropped it.
"Why does Xigbar carry around a flippin' gun?!" The blonde shivered at the memory of the barrel of the small handgun pointing down the hallway toward him. Even though it hadn't been directed at him, but instead would have destroyed the creature above him. That truth didn't make the ordeal any less horrifying.
"Again, something I'll tell you later."
"Why?" the blonde whined, unable to help himself. He was slightly annoyed that the redhead lied. Axel said he would answer anything and already his two questions that he wanted answered were shot down.
"It ties into the whole me-Seifer thing. I promise you'll find out later. I'm just not ready to talk about it yet. You'll be the first I tell, though. Promise."
"Fine."
"Anything else?"
"Why me? I mean, there was nothing special about me. I've always been shoved out of the way. Now I have three guys that want to fuck me."
Axel chuckled. "Well, you reminded me a lot of my bro. Hey, don't take it like that!" Axel cried, stretching his hand out to Roxas whose face crumbled into one of mild disgust. He let his hand fall, grazing Roxas' completely by mistake. "I don't wanna fuck my brother, okay! I meant how lost and scared you looked. It just reminded me of Reno ... when he was still at home. He was always so scared and tentative. Then again, he had to be. But it wasn't his fault. It was never his fault. ... It was always mine. ... " Something faltered on the redhead's face. "The stupid God-damned prick! It wasn't my fault. It wasn't! It wasn't my fault!" Axel cringed, pulling his legs up to his chest, ignoring the pain in his head as he tried to become as small as possible. Roxas tilted his head in confusion.
"A-Axel?"
"It wasn't my fault! But he doesn't believe me! He doesn't believe me! But only a few more months and then he'll have to believe me. He'll have to! But he still won't believe me." Roxas was scared of the sudden venomous tone of the redhead. What had set him off? Talking about his brother? The blonde deemed that another taboo. But he didn't think much about it, more concerned about the redhead's well-being.
"Axel, are you okay?"
Roxas could see the tears and mild hysteria rocking Axel's body at the memories obviously flooding his mind. The only thing that Roxas could think to do was go comfort the sobbing redhead. "Axel? Axel, it'll be okay." Something dawned on the redhead's features as he felt arms wrap around him. He cringed away from the touch, his breathing labored. "Axel, shh, it's okay. I'm not whoever you think I am. I'm Roxas, remember. Rox-as."
"R-Rox... Rox-as? M-My ... Ro-Roxas? Does m-my Rox-as believe me? Does he believe it isn't my fault?!"
"What isn't your fault, Axel?"
"I didn't make mom leave! I didn't, I didn't! I was no bastard child! I didn't make her leave! I didn't! I swear to God, Rox-as, I didn't make her leave."
Roxas was almost shoved over as the redhead pressed his face into the crook of the blonde's neck. The blonde held him tight, wondering what had happened. One thing was obvious to him, though. Axel was abused. It was apparent that his father was blaming him for his mother leaving and it was making Axel slip slowly into insanity. A moment of rocking the elder teen slipped by and Roxas could feel Axel beginning to relax. Another few minutes and the redhead pulled away, wiping at his eyes.
"D-Dear God, Rox. I-I ... I didn't hurt you, did I?"
"H-Hurt me? No? Why would you?"
Axel blushed, pulling farther from the confused blonde.
"I-I have to get home. I ... I'm really sorry, Rox. I didn't mean to. I just ... I'm not sure what just happened. M-My brother was able to leave the house a few years ago and ... he didn't take me with him. I-I think that's enough questions for today, okay? I'm really sorry you had to see that. I was so disgusting. I'm so sorry, Rox."
Roxas reached up as the redhead stood. "W-Wait, Axel. Are you sure you're gonna be okay? W-Why don't you stay here tonight?" Where the hell had that come from? Roxas mentally slapped his palm to his forehead. It was just a spur-of-the-moment thing. He just ... was helping someone in need. A friend. He was just helping a friend in need. Axel smiled at the younger blonde, brushing his fingers against those of the blonde.
"I really appreciate it, Rox. Really, I do. But, not tonight. Can you keep the invitation open, though?"
"What do you mean?"
"If I ever need to get away ... do you think I could come here?"
Axel was gripping his head, massaging it with one hand as the other gripped Roxas' more firmly. Roxas smiled, his cheeks heating at the feel.
"I-I ... I don't see why not." Besides the fact that I have a boyfriend and you might rape me in the middle of the night. But I'll be doing you a favour. "Yeah, any time. Even when I'm not around. I think mom likes you enough to let you in."
What the hell was he saying? The redhead was beaming down at him. "Thank you so much, Rox. You are too amazing. I'm still ... really sorry though. Are you sure I didn't hurt you?"
"Why would you have hurt me?"
A large blush began to bite at the redhead's cheeks. "I ... Well, one time ... I got into one of those breakdowns .... and I knocked Dem out cold. Slammed him right across the face and he went flyin'. Xig told me later. He had to tackle me to the ground with this other guy we were hangin' out with. An ex-member of their band. He was a prick though. But, yeah, anyway, I hurt my best friend. So, I'm really shocked that I didn't hurt you. Are you sure you're okay?"
Roxas nodded, letting the information sink in. "Positive. I should be the one to say sorry. I forced you into it."
"Nah. But, you did remind me of my brother and I just had this strong urge to protect you. Seifer only wants you because he wants everything I have, the prick. As for Zexion ... I think he's just a whore and is taking advantage of you. So, no more hating me?"
Roxas smiled. "No promises. I'm still really confused, remember."
Axel returned the smile, slipping his hand away from the blonde's. "I'll give you all the time you need to get unconfused."
"See you, Axel. Stay safe."
"I will, Rox. Don't worry. I love you and I'll always be here to protect you."
The redhead left the room, not expecting the words to be returned back to him. Roxas bit his lip, hard, not even minding the sting as he drew his knees up to his chest. "Is it bad ... that I want to protect you too?"
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"Where the fuck were you? You're fuckin' late, boy!"
"I'm sorry. I was with a friend."
"Those fag-friends of yours? That's why your mother left! Because you are a fuckin' fag!"
"Seifer is a 'fag', too, Dad."
"Don't give me that attitude, you fuckin' faggot!"
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"Dem, is your mom home? I ... I think I broke something again."
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To Be Continued
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Okay, in case you are confused, Axel had a panic attack type thing because he was thinking about when his brother was home. He has a few of those. But, you'll find out more about that later. Any questions or need something cleared up, just tell me, kay? Any thoughts at all I would like to hear!
Going through this life, looking for angels. People passing by, looking for angels. - Looking for Angels
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