Love Makes You Do the Wacky

(RATED M; Q/P/R/F, P/R)

CHAPTER XVII- MVP, Most Valuable Player

Puck waited, out of sight by the door leading into the locker room. When he was sure that all the players had left he marched through the door. He saw Coach Tanaka with a shit-eating grin on his face, sitting on the stool in front of the benches, cleaning his stupid whistle.

Coach kissed his whistle and hung it back around his neck, when he heard the footsteps, looked up, then quickly back down. He picked up another stupid whistle out of the padded case balanced on his knee as he spoke,"You better be here to clean out you locker, Puckerman. I swear if you leave it one more day I'm letting the boys have it. And tell the other deserters, why don'cha?"

Puck stopped in front of him and glared, "I'm not here to clean out my locker. I'm here to get my jersey back. Everyone's jersey back."

"Oh? Did you deserters come to your senses and quit that damn club?" He laughed to himself, but puck didn't move.

"No," he said simply. Coach looked up at him with one brow raised, "I'm doing both. We're all doing both."

Tanaka dropped his whistle and scowled, "Look, Puckerman, I told you boys-"

"Yeah you told us," Puck interrupted, "that doesn't mean we're gonna listen. You know that every one of us in the club are the best damn players on the field. Even Kurt. He's a fuckin' ballerina, but he still scored more points in half a season then the entire team combined in the last three seasons."

Tanaka was silent, with his arms folded across his chest. He grunted and said, "Kurt's the best damn kicker I've seen in a while. Mike and Matt may be dumbfucks at times, but their teamwork is solid. You're ruthless… on and off the field apparently, and Finn's the quarterback. I can't get rid of my quarterback."

Puck lifted his chin, "So, what's it gonna be, Coach? You gonna let us back in, or what?"

Coach unfolded his arms and handed Puck the box of whistles. Puck looked at it like it was a rat with an ear in it, but took it when Tanaka thrust it at him insistently. Tanaka bended over and pick up a small cardboard box. When he opened it up, he handed Puck a trophy that said MVP on it and thrust the rest of the box full of red mesh at him. The red mesh on the top, in white lettering, said 20, Puckerman.

CHAPTER XVIII- Relief

Puck found her right where he left her, and when she heard his footsteps, looked up and jumped to her feet. When he reached her, he set the trophy down on the bleacher next to the cardboard box of jerseys, he reached him and grabbed his number 20 jersey.

"I want you to have this," he said, handing it to her.

She took the cloth gingerly from him and held it out to see. Her eyes flicked from his name to his face, back and forth about five times before she squealed in glee and jumped into his arms. "Noah!" She yelled into his ear, "Oh my, God! How did you do it?"

"Ouch, Rach," he said as he set her down and rubbed the ear she yelled into, "You know I do need my ear drum." She looked at him apologetically, but something told him she didn't really mean it. "I just had a talk with Coach Tanaka, that's all."

Rachel's eyes widened, "Oh, no , Noah. You didn't hurt him did you? Do I need to call 911 emergency?" She began walking toward the locker room but was stopped by Puck stepping in front of her.

"No, you don't. All we did was talk. Calmly. And I convinced him that we were more of an asset to the team even with Glee Club… and then," he reached down and snatched up the trophy, "he gave me this."

She took it when he handed it to her and let her eyes flicker across it, "MVP? Noah, that's wonderful! Congratulations!" She hugged him again. "But, what about the others?"

Puck took the trophy from her and, instead handed her the cardboard box. She flipped through it and saw 5, Hudson; 2, Hummel; 17, Rutherford; and 18, Chang written on the remaining four jerseys. Rachel pulled Puck's jersey over her and, after Puck made lewd catcall and smacked her ass, they strode to the choral room.

"Oh, sweet Prada!" Kurt said, as he noticed Rachel on Puck's arm wearing his football jersey.

"Rachel, what the hell? Are you trying to get slushied?" Mike yelled.

"That thing is like a fuckin' bullseye!" Bellowed Matt.

"You should take that off, before one of the other players see you." Finn told her.

Rachel and Puck looked at each other knowingly and smiled. "It won't matter," said Rachel.

The boys, in fact the entire Glee Club had question marks over their heads. Puck pulled the cardboard box from under his arm and as he spoke tossed each boy their respective jersey. "Because we're all back on the team!"

The club cheered. Matt and Mike gave each other high-fives, Finn kissed Quinn and Kurt and Mercedes giggled together with Brittney and Santana. "Oh!" Puck yelled loudly to quiet down the club, "Coach said to be at practice early tomorrow so he can share the news with the rest of the team."

Finn furrowed his brow, "What news?"

"Well," Rachel began, "Coach Tanaka named Noah Mr. M.V.P." She punctuated every letter with a pause.

"What?" Finn laughed in excitement, "But it's not the end of the season yet!"

Puck smiled, "Coach said to consider it a homecoming present."

Puck and Rachel walked over to the group and, with their friends agreed to meet at Finn and Kurt's house, since they newly became step-brothers and had the biggest (and their parents were going to be away), for a celebratory party.

All was good in the club and at school. The Gleeks didn't get slushie anymore, and moved back to their enjoined table with the jocks and Cheerios!, and Puck and Rachel were finally able to be happy.

YEA! Alls well, that ends well. But there's still the EPILOGUE. (PS. This next chapter is the one that gains the fic's M-RATED-ness. You have been warned)