Deidara's Brother
"But Nii-san!"
"No, it's too dangerous!" Deidara firmly argued, walking out the door of the house he shared with his younger, yet somehow slightly-more-masculine brother.
"You let me go with you before!" his blonde-haired, ten-and-a-half year old brother whined, following Deidara outside, the door slamming shut behind him.
"This is different. I'm not coming back here this time." He sighed. "Just go back inside, Reimei," he commanded, walking further away from the decrepit house.
"No, Nii-san! You said we'd always stay together!" he dove down, grabbing his older brother's leg.
"I'm sorry." Deidara shook his head.
"But— You— Who's going to take me flying?"
"You're ten years old, you can do it yourself."
"I want you to do it with me!"
Deidara sighed, placing one hand over his face, looking down to hide a smile. "One last time."
"Thank you!" Reimei raced around excitedly in a circle, reminding Deidara that he probably shouldn't be left alone. He had no choice, however. He shook his head again, but caught a glimpse of Reimei running around in a circle, yelling, and smiled. He looked so much like their mother— they both did, actually— but Reimei had his mother's eyes, a light-brown, innocent color. Deidara had his father's blue eyes, and they both had his Bloodline Limit. He taught his eldest son, Deidara, how to use his extra abilities. After that, he simply left, leaving behind a very small, confused, five-year-old Deidara, his mother, and a young baby boy, happy as can be because he knew nothing about the injustice that had just happened. When Deidara was twelve and Reimei seven, their mother died due to an accident they had while Deidara was trying to teach Reimei his powers. Since then, Deidara had raised his little brother like his own child, promising to always be there to protect him, to be the role model he never had for himself. They had become very close in these three and a half years. Deidara even took him on his bombing raids sometimes— he had to do more and more ever since their mother died, to put up with a growing Reimei.
But now, he was being recruited by the Akatsuki, and leaving Reimei behind.
"Come on, don't you want to go?" Deidara asked, interrupting Reimei's celebrating, which now consisted of exploding rocks, sticks, and small animals that he found.
"Don't waste your clay. Come on."
"Sorry! Hang on…" he stopped exploding rocks and sticks, then jumped up onto the giant bird. As soon as he did, it lifted its wings and soared into the air.
"Hey, where are you going to meet them, anyway?" Reimei asked, trying to sit still for once— he had fallen off one time, and that wasn't a memory he liked to think about.
"Who?"
"The Akatsuki! You're joining today, right?"
"Of course I am. They should be somewhere in that forest, tell me if you see them."
"Can I join? We could be partners! We already know how to work together…"
Deidara laughed. "I doubt they'd put us together. And you're too young!"
"Aw, but I wanna join!"
"Rei, try in a few more years. By then, your powers should be more developed, and you'll be as good an artist as I am." He punctuated this sentence with the explosion of a house hundreds of feet below.
"Nice shot, Nii-san!"
"Thanks, Rei! Wanna try one for yourself?"
"No, I'm not as good as you…"
"Just give it a shot! I know you can do it."
"Well, I'll try…" he closed his eyes to concentrate, and prepared an explosive bird—though you couldn't tell it was a bird— and threw it down. He detonated it, and the side of a cliff near them exploded, causing dust to swirl around them. They coughed and gagged, closing their eyes. The bird flew around the dust cloud, and Reimei grinned as soon as he stopped coughing. "Shit, I missed."
"You watch your mouth, Reimei!" Deidara chastised like their mother would have.
"Sorry!"
"What were you aiming for?"
"The house next to the one you blew up."
"Oh. Work on the timing of the explosion! The wind here makes it hard to calculate, but you can do it. I've said it a million times, Rei."
"I'm trying!"
"You'll get it eventually." I hope.
They circled around above the woods until Reimei pointed at some figures on the ground. "Aren't those the Akatsuki, Dei?"
"Yes they are! Thanks. Hopefully they won't kill you for being with me…" He landed the bird in a clearing in the woods near the Akatsuki, and it vanished as soon as they got off.
"—I told you a million times, Itachi! I'm not a shark!" a blue man—with…. Gills?— and a giant sword across his back yelled at a man with black hair. They all turned around as Deidara walked over to them, Reimei behind him, clutching his big brother's arm.
"Deidara." A man with orange hair and metal bars on his face stated. "Who is this?" the man pointed to Reimei, half-hidden by his big brother, making a whimpering sound.
"My little brother. Sorry… He begged to come! He loves you guys."
The man with long, black hair— and was that the Sharingan?— stared intently at Reimei, who made another choked whining sound and looked away. The man began to speak to him, moving in closer. "Reimei, was it?"
He nodded, and the man moved in still closer, putting his face next to his. He looked away, blushing— he'd never even been this close to a girl before— but the man gently placed his hand under his chin, moving Reimei's face towards his so they were eye to eye.
"How old are you?"
"Ten and a half," he declared as proudly as he could in that situation.
"You're about the same age as my brother." He stroked Reimei's long blonde hair gently with his other hand. "If you're into guys, you might wanna meet him."
"I— I like girls!" he stammered, embarrassed, trying to break free from the man's grip. He did his best to look away, to hide his increasingly reddening face.
"Itachi, stop teasing the poor boy!" a woman with blue hair and the same metal bars on her face as the man with orange hair, ordered. It was obvious that she was in charge, or had some authority over the other members. She moved over to Reimei, slapping the man—Itachi— and he let go of Reimei's face without making a sound. He walked away, chuckling to himself.
"Ugh, he thinks he's so funny, but he's a sicko… I'm Konan, but you don't need to worry about us unless you join. Judging by your reaction to Itachi, you're much too young to get to know the real Akatsuki." He half-expected her to smile, showing off a set of pointy, predator-like teeth. "So, if you do decide to come here… It'll be a while."
"I— I'm going to join," he boldly said, fighting back his fear, but unable to contain the flashes of fear in his wide, innocent eyes. "If you let my brother in, I can get in too."
"Aww… Such a cute kid… I hope you're not like the others. You don't deserve that painful an end…"
"Can I meet the others? Like that shark-guy? And who's that guy with the huge scythe?" He asked hastily, wanting to get away from this woman.
The blue man glared at Reimei, then yelled from where Deidara was—about twenty feet away— "I'm NOT a SHARK!"
Damn, he had good hearing.
"Okay, okay, calm the fuck down!" the man with the scythe cursed.
The blue man focused on him now. "Why does everyone call me a shark?"
"You do look like one." Konan pointed out.
"I'm not! I'm human… Mostly. Name's Kisame."
"Hey, fuck you! You're not human. I'm Hidan, forget the name and I fuckin' kill ya. Speaking of which, I do need someone for a ritual…"
"What…?" Reimei asked, confused, tilting his head to one side.
Itachi shook his head. "Don't ask."
"He wants to kill you." Another man said apathetically, counting a rather large stack of bills.
"Sacrifice, not kill. Dumbass." He continued swearing, and if his brother wasn't busy talking to Pein, he'd explode Hidan for 'corrupting Reimei's mind.' Deidara was very overprotective.
"Tobi! Get back here!" a voice called and a figure ran out from the woods. It was now dusk, and the man gave the appearance of stepping out of nowhere. A deeper voice answered the first. "Let him go, he'll come back eventually. Maybe then he won't be such a pain in the ass."
Reimei couldn't figure out where the voice was coming from; he could only see one figure. And he didn't see why anyone would talk to themselves in a different voice…
"Ugh, stupid Tobi…" the man with orange hair muttered. "I'm your new leader, Deidara. Reimei, you would do well to remember me as well, if you truly intend to join our ranks. Obey me, Deidara, or suffer."
"I'll do as you ask, uh…" he did not know this man's name.
"Pein."
"I'll do as you ask, Pein." He finished.
"Sasori, your last partner is dead due your— well, no need to worry you, Deidara... Step forward."
A red-haired man took a few steps toward them, no expression in his eyes. A sense of coldness emanated from him, as if he wasn't human. No…. Wasn't alive. "I'm Sasori. Looks like I'm your new partner." He smirked slightly. Very slightly; Deidara couldn't have caught it if he didn't have a perfect artist's attention to detail.
"Hi, Sasori. I—"
"TOBI, GET BACK HERE!"
There was a girlish giggling, followed by a slightly more masculine, "No!" A figure with an orange mask covering his entire face stood a few feet from Deidara and Reimei. Sasori whispered to Deidara, "That's Tobi. He's a member-in-training, like you, but you'll learn everything quicker than him, since you actually seem competent, so you'll probably end up joining quicker than him."
"Hi! I'm Tobi! Tobi is a good boy!" he held out a hand to Deidara, who shook his hand hesitantly.
"I'm Deidara… Hi, Tobi."
Another member, who seemed half-man, half-plant (what was with these freakish hybrids?) grabbed Tobi by the arm, saving him from an awkward conversation. Tobi struggled, shouting, "Zetsu-san! I wanna talk to Dei like everyone else! I've been a good boy!" Everyone else either shrugged, sighed in frustration, laughed, or rolled their eyes.
"He's under control now, Pein."
"Thank you, Zetsu. Go back to our hideout with him."
Zetsu nodded, then disappeared into the forest with Tobi.
"Well, I think you've met everyo—" Pein started, but was interrupted by a long-haired transvestite with a rather long tongue.
"What about me, Pein?"
"You quit. Ten years ago, as I recall."
"Still… I can't resist seeing the new boys you bring in." his eyes drifted to Reimei. He teleported directly behind him, still unnoticed by the young boy. "And who's this fine piece of ass?" he brushed Reimei's blonde hair aside and licked the back of his neck, making him jump and shriek like a little girl, but hit the strange person like a man, possible breaking his nose. There was blood all over his face—good hit, he complimented himself— but he still smiled at Reimei.
"Orochimaru, quit it." Pein commanded, bored, while at the same time, Deidara began yelling.
"Get away from my little brother!"
Sasori had to grab him around his waist to hold him back. "Calm down, Deidara!"
Deidara, in his rage, didn't notice the semi-throbbing sensation near his ass. "No! I'll kill you! Get away from him, you asshole!"
Orochimaru just twirled his black hair around his finger innocently, giggling loudly. Reimei wondered who was straighter: Tobi, who also giggled loudly, or the man behind him, who tried to violate him in ways he couldn't—and didn't want to— imagine.
"Seriously, get the hell outta here!" Hidan yelled, grabbing his scythe.
"Oh, hey, you're pretty sexy too." His attention was now focused on Deidara, and he walked towards him. "What's your name, baby?"
Deidara growled. "Get away from me, sicko."
Orochimaru sighed. "That's what they all say… It gets so lonely… Thank God for my right hand, or I don't know what I'd do…"
Everybody shuddered— including Reimei, remembering the talk Deidara gave him— Sex is inserting… a certain part of yourself… into a woman… Or man… And if you're lonely with nobody around… Well… Use your hands and figure it out. It's even easier for us, see? With our extra mouths, you can— well… Anyway, if you do that, don't finish inside it, because that gets… Awkward…
That was easily the most awkward day of Reimei's life. Well, possibly, this one was worse.
Itachi walked over to Orochimaru—now everyone was pretty much in a group, all within earshot; aside from the man with the stack of bills, indifferent to the conversation going on, still counting.
"My little brother wouldn't say that…" Itachi pressed his lips to Orochimaru's ear—everyone admired his courage— and whispered words nobody else could hear, possibly besides Kisame, who snickered to himself. Damn, Reimei thought for a second time, He has seriously good hearing for a shark… I don't think sharks have ears…
"Sasuke?" he hissed, "I finally get my chance at Sasuke?"
"Sure. After Naruto broke up with him, he got heart-broken and left the village, as we all know. If you can find him and keep him safe, you'll get your chance at his—" he coughed, as if in disbelief that he was saying such profane words that seemed so beneath his class, "—tight, virgin asshole."
"Good… I've been waiting years for his body to mature… Now, I don't have to wait any longer… I'll find him within the hour." Those were the last words on the subject he said to Itachi; his next words were directed to Reimei. He turned to the young boy, winked, and said, "You'll have your chance at this body soon, but Sasuke-kun has always been my dream man!" he held his hands, clasped together to his chest, and stared dreamily off into the distance, very feminine-like—though there was nothing to see; the sun had already set— before vanishing, much to everyone's relief.
"Don't worry, Deidara. He left years ago." Pein explained, sounding relieved himself.
"Thank God! He's a freak. If he ever gets near Reimei again, I'll—"
"Don't worry too much about it. None of us want to kill him because he wants us alive. He helps us out, even if he's a creep. He saves us every now and then, and we put up with the occasional unwanted groping. Even though he's a pervert, he is one of the Sannin. Though he does hit on every man in sight… And occasionally a few boys." Pein explained, gesturing at Reimei.
Konan smiled. "I'm safe. I might not get the protection he offers, but I can do that myself. After all, I'm stronger. That's why I'm in charge."
"Shut the hell up, Konan, it's not fair!" Hidan shouted, brandishing his scythe. "I still get touched, and I can't die!"
"Hidan, just shut up for once, you idiot." Said the man still counting yet another stack of bills, ignoring everyone else.
"Damn it, Kakuzu… Dumb motherfucker…" he muttered angrily.
"So, is everybody ready?" Pein asked, his voice stopping all the indistinct conversation and arguments between the members. Deidara kept stealing glances at Sasori, blushing, wondering if they would share a bed.
They all offered some form of agreement— "Yes," "Yeah," "Uh-huh," "YES, hurry the fuck up," or a simple nod. "Come now, Deidara. We'll take you to your new hideout."
Reimei jumped up as Deidara nodded, then attached himself to his brother's leg. "Don't leave me, Nii-san!"
His older brother gave only a solemn shake of the head, a last gesture of apology. He sighed, stroking Reimei's head, murmuring so only his brother could hear his last, private words to him. "I'm sorry, Reimei… Goodbye."
"DON'T GO!" He shrieked, a second too late, a sound that echoed through the forest that was now empty except for him and a few small animals. Pein and Sasori had taken his brother away from him, each holding one of his arms like a prisoner (Deidara vaguely wondered what else would happen like he was a prisoner) as they teleported him away to a future Reimei nor Deidara could see, one deeply that frightened them both.