Chapter Six:
It's Hard Looking Cool with a Boner in Your Ass/Phoenix
Hidan was getting off on being watched, but Reimei was freaking out. He wanted to be alone— with Hidan, of course. Today, his first day of the Akatsuki, wasn't turning out how he expected at all. He had only made it worse by having sex with Hidan; his ass hurt like hell, worse than ever, from Hidan's 'first attempt.' It was only getting worse as every second passed, the satisfaction of his orgasm wearing off.
"You'd better wash those sheets if you expect me to sleep here, Pein." A distinguished American-accented voice spoke, obviously offended about something.
"Too bad. I already took the sheets off. And those are already ruined. So it looks like you're sleeping on the floor." It was hard looking cool with your lover still on top of you, but as Reimei didn't have to make eye contact, he managed this with sarcasm and insults. It could be fun pissing him off.
"No. You're sleeping on the floor." He took one of his knives and pressed it to Reimei's throat. "This is a poisoned blade. If I press the blade in just a little more, the poison goes into your bloodstream and you die. Then I'd carve up your carcass like a Thanksgiving turkey. So, tell me. How much does sleeping on a bed mean to you?" he moved the knife away from Reimei slightly so he could answer.
"N—not worth it." His vocal cords had been frozen in fear, and it was hard to speak.
"Good. Now… You." He pointed the knife at Hidan, who was still in Reimei. It was almost getting funny at this point. "Out."
"Out of him or out of the room?" he didn't swear; just joking around was enough to piss him off. Which, since he couldn't die, Hidan always liked to do.
"That's a man?" he looked genuinely shocked, eyes wide.
"Uh, yeah… Can't you see my dick? Look how big—" he started to sit up slightly to show him, but Phoenix dropped to the floor.
Hidan, who was finally out of Reimei, put his cloak on and laughed his ass off with Reimei.
"There'll be hell to pay for that later. Reimei, you might want to go hide. He gets… Furious. Hidan, as you know, you're safe. Just don't kill him."
"Kick ass. Should be fun."
Once his cloak was on and zipped most of the way up, Reimei ran out of the room, scared to death. "Bye, Reimei!" Hidan waved femininely, moving his fingers slowly, but the gesture went unnoticed, as did the grin on his face, his whole body anticipating the fun to come. He snickered to himself. Phoenix was always fun to play with.
Reimei ran to his big brother's room. When he got there, he hesitated before knocking, his hand frozen in midair. What were the odds they were… Fucking?! He didn't want to walk in on them! Itachi was pretty hot, but that was his brother!
"Nh— Itachi!" he heard a loud moan from inside the room. Shit. This was the only room he could hide in, though… I really have no choice… He knocked on the door reluctantly, almost hoping it wouldn't be heard. A groan was heard, along with unclear words. He recognized it was Itachi's quiet voice. The next was his brother's. "Don't answer it, then, Itachi! Stay with me…" there was so much lust in his voice. It was closer to a purr than a voice. Now I really don't want to be here… After a minute or two of rummaging sounds, a half-naked (actually, only wearing boxers, so mostly naked) Itachi appeared, a glare in his eyes.
"The hell do you want, Reimei?" he growled, pure hatred in his voice.
"I—my partner… He wants to kill me!"
"Let me guess. They gave you Phoenix?"
"Um… Yeah."
"Ugh, once that crazy bastard gets going, he's impossible to stop. He needs an outlet for his anger. He's worse than the rest of us, he loves torture… He hides it well, but once his real self comes out, it's over." He looked at Deidara, who laid on the bed, biting his lower lip to keep from crying out to Itachi. His lower body was covered by a thin blanket, but he could still see everything, unfortunately. He held back a snicker as he realized Hidan had been telling the truth.
"Phoenix? That crazy… Let him stay, Itachi! He'll die if we don't…" he was slightly grinding his hips, trying to get some friction against the blanket. Jesus, he's desperate… I'm never looking at him the same way again. He was moaning slightly. Ugh… Sex addicts, both of them!
"Yeah, he can stay." At this point, I'd rather have him kill me than be stuck with you two.
"Um, sorry for interrupting you guys…"
"It's fine… Phoenix is a crazy motherfucker…" Itachi muttered.
"I hope Hidan's okay… He's still in there…" Reimei said.
"Hidan's there? Oh, he'll have a hell of a time, that masochist…" Itachi grinned, as if remembering a previous incident with those two.
"The fuck's that mean?"
Oh, great, he's getting Hidan's dirty mouth, Deidara thought to himself, I really need to get him away from Reimei! He's so corrupting!
"Oh, you'll see…" Itachi chuckled to himself. "You can stay if you want… Deidara, let's go to my room, I doubt Reimei wants to see us. Get the—" he looked at Reimei. "Well… Usual things."
"Okay." Deidara had to fight to remain focused, distracting himself the best he could from his condition. He gathered a few objects Reimei was glad he couldn't see and placed them all into a bag.
"All right, let's go. Good luck with Phoenix, Reimei."
Meanwhile, in Reimei's room, Phoenix jolted awake, looking around at his surroundings, a sadistic smile on his face and a wild look in his eyes. An evil, demented laugh filled the room, his eyes focusing on Hidan.
"Shit, he's feral again," Hidan told Pein, as if he didn't already know. "Can you control him, when he's like this?"
"You again? I had fun last time, you know."
"So did I. Heh. Didn't get enough last time, you crazy bitch?"
"I can never get enough." They talked like lovers, yet there was nothing between them. He watched Phoenix pick his chain-scythe off the floor, grinning, and nervous anticipation filled Hidan's body, making him sweat. Here we go again. "You're always ready to be my bitch!"
After jumping behind Hidan like the ninja he was, landing in a crouch, he pushed Hidan from the bed to the ground, then jumped off the bed as well. It was only two or three feet off the ground, yet he made it look badass somehow. He took the cloak off Hidan, then immediately started to hack away at Hidan's body, laughing all the while as Hidan cursed from the immense pain, screaming, yet also moaning as if he was having another orgasm— which, he might be soon, as Phoenix began to slash his lower body. He started with his ankles, right then left, then going up across the inside of Hidan's legs in a zigzagging motion, the scythe's blade making deep gashes in Hidan's flesh—and occasionally slicing clean through his flesh, making Phoenix's sick smile even wider. As he sliced up Hidan's body, the hand holding him still made its way up as well, getting a coating of blood as it did. He jammed his fingers into the cuts, making him howl in pain, fulfilling Phoenix's desire to make him scream.
I forgot how bad this was last time… Fucker's carving me up like a damn turkey.
When Phoenix's fingers reached Hidan's waist, after about ten seconds; this fucker could move his hands quicker than the eye could see, Hidan let out a small moan of pleasure as he became hard. He immediately tried to cover it with a pained scream, but it was too late, and Phoenix wasn't falling for it. It was too late. Oh, damn it. Shit.
"Oh, getting a bit excited, are we?" he let out a maniacal laugh, then cut it off abruptly, clawing into Hidan's thigh with one hand and lifted his body up, then slammed it to the floor, now slick with blood. He replaced his scythe across his back, reaching for his twin daggers at his waist. They looked as hungry for blood as Phoenix was himself. "You don't have more fun than me."
He cut parallel, long, vertical gashes simultaneously into Hidan's chest, and he felt one puncture an organ Hidan couldn't name. He wouldn't die, no matter what the knife damaged. His organs always healed before they could fail.
Phoenix kept cutting until, literally, Hidan's entire body, every inch, was covered in deep gashes. Shit, what am I gonna tell Reimei about this?
"Now, for the best part!"
Shit, this can't fuckin' be good…
Phoenix licked some of the blood away from Hidan's waist, making him squirm. My little uke…
"Now, roll over." Phoenix smirked, a dark look in his eyes.
God… If this is another one of his 'finales' I swear… They hurt so bad.
Hidan couldn't move from the pain, and when Phoenix flipped him over, all his cuts stung worse than when they were inflicted.
Phoenix pulled out a smaller, sharper knife than he used on the rest of Hidan's body. Hidan recognized it. Bad things happen with that knife… He shuddered at the memory, the pain of which hurt worse than the pain now. Despite how badly it hurt, Hidan knew it could be worse. 'Feral Phoenix' hadn't been let loose for a few weeks, and his skills were getting a bit rusty.
Phoenix cut short, rapid marks into Hidan's back, hands flying as he formed the final detail. Damn, this guy's good with a knife…
Phoenix stopped, tracing the marks, making Hidan gasp and scream again. He smiled, picturing what the cuts would form as soon as they scarred.
Phoenix Gallows
He smirked, satisfied with his work, though it was a shame it would be completely gone, erased from Hidan's body forever, in a few short days. Not even the pain, or a few faint marks would linger. Just the memory. Hidan's body healed faster, and never scarred, unlike normal people. Though he was always angry his work, his elaborate patterns, would never last, at least Hidan's immortal body left a blank, unrestricted canvas each time. Most people he designed, as he called it, were so hard to engrave, being mortal. Of course, he didn't mind killing, but he wanted his work to be known.
He licked clean one of his black blades, savoring the delicious taste of blood. He chuckled. "You're lucky… I'm satisfied… For now." He placed his twin blades, which he had left on the bloody floor, into his sheaths on opposite hips. He did this in one motion, arms crossing over each other.
"The hell—No! I don't want to go back yet!" he held one bloodstained hand over his face, shaking his head rapidly, shrieking, "No!"
The shrieking ceased abruptly, the figure removing the hand from his face, showing a bloody handprint over his left eye when he looked toward Hidan. "Damn, I really let loose this time." He looked over Hidan's bloodied body, which showed many signs of the abuse it had gone through. "Thanks." The thanks was empty and meant nothing to Phoenix; it was only a formality.
"No problem, you crazy motherfucker. Hey! The fuck're you going? You normally clean me up after! Asshole!"
He laughed, not the demented, crazed laugh from earlier; more gentle and humorous. He looked back at Hidan from the doorway, still lying naked on the floor. "I'm going to meet my partner." He walked out the door, running his fingers down the blade of his knife, letting out no sound as the warm blood ran over his fingers, dripping slowly onto the floor. Hidan caught a glimpse of the malice in his eyes and the grin on his face.
Sometimes, Phoenix scared the shit out of him.
A/N: Ah! This was so fun to write! I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did! The title may not fit the entire chapter, but it made me laugh so SUCK IT. I also had to put the title up at the top of the page because it wouldn't fit in the um… Label thingy? Anyway, I didn't plan on making Phoenix that crazy, it just kind of… Happened. He really is one crazy bastard, isn't he? Anyway, I should put the next chapter up soon. Reviews would be much appreciated! =D