Sooo, I'm mad at the moment. Well, pissed would be the appropriate word, but mad and pissed, same thing. Ha. But writing always helps and I can't afford more delay because I know there are people waiting for this chapter. :) So, here you go.

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Last time: I'd just have to suck it up. Great.

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Over and Over

Brooke's POV:

After Lucas had left, I realized I couldn't always be spending the time like I was now. Vulnerable. Pathetic. Yes, it was pathetic.

Lucas couldn't have this affect on me each time I saw him or heard his voice over the phone; saw his picture in a magazine or thought of him. It was really, like I said before and enunciating now, pathetic. I mean, I only realized I was still in love with him, what, last night? And all of a sudden I was acting as if I'd known this forever. Maybe I had. Maybe deep down in my heart I knew that I was always in love with him, that he had always been the one for me. The one to believe in me like I believed in him. He picked up the pieces of my broken heart when Angie left me and I helped him when Peyton turned down his proposal. Maybe I had always known he was the Yin to my Yang. But I wasn't his. His own was Peyton, weather he saw it now or not. Everyone else saw it; they were meant to be.

There were two little voices in my head. One telling me that I was being crazy. Lucas was mine and always had been mine. And the other telling me that I was just beating myself up more and that I should just forget about him. Both of these did different things to my heart. The first made my head beat faster, wishing and hoping with all my might it was true. The second, made my heart fall. It was too hard to even think about forgetting the blonde haired, blue eyed boy that had stolen my heart since high school. I couldn't do that. It was like telling Haley to leave Nathan and never love him again. It was impossible; I couldn't stand it.

I couldn't let my mind linger too long on this. It was driving me to a point where I'd probably end up on the couch with the tv off and a pint of ice cream in my hands. First on the agenda was a shower. It would help clear my mind. I made my way upstairs into the big house I used to share with my blonde haired best friend and now shared with my foster daughter. I grabbed my towel from the linen closet and made my way towards the bathroom. I stripped and got in. I had been right. As soon as the warm water hit my skin, my body instantly relaxed. I closed my eyes and let the water run for a bit. My mind ran different scenarios in this short amount of time. Lucas' face in a smile, the way he looked when Peyton left him. When he kissed me.

I opened my eyes. Snap out of it, Brooke! Jesus. Could I do anything or go anywhere without seeing his face? I'm pretty sure the answer would've been no if I was being honest with myself. I shook my head and ran a hand over my hair, biting my lip. I spent the rest of my shower focusing on the water and washing myself.

I got out in a shorter time than expected and wrapped my towel around my wet body, making my way to my room. Thankfully, my bathroom was right in my room so I only had a few steps to take. Work. Random thought, but work could help get my mind off of anything. It worked when I started Clothes Over Bros and it sure as hell could work now. I got dressed in a tank top and jeans. I was feeling casual today. Over that, I placed a light denim jacket and my heels came on. I wouldn't let Lucas linger on my mind much longer...I hoped.

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Lucas' POV:

I couldn't understand it. It seemed that was the only thing I could understand these days.

At first, I could understand why Peyton had left me. I did now. I couldn't understand why it had been me to lose so much, and that I still didn't have an answer to. And I didn't understand two things about Brooke. One question that had been plaguing me ever since it happened and truth be told, it was getting annoying now. By now, it was obvious I was talking about our kiss. And the second thing was how she looked this morning. She looked so much not like the Brooke I was used to seeing. I mean, I had seen her that way before, but no often. The last time I can actually remember seeing her like that was when we were at the airport, when Angie left. It broke Brooke's heart and I could see it. I missed that little girl. She could've put a smile on anyone's face just by giving them their own smile.

When Brooke practically shoved me out of her house, I didn't actually leave. My car was parked in front and i just got in. The engine hadn't been started up, I was just sitting there, the keys weren't even in the ignition. I had no intention of leaving just yet. I promised myself I'd find out, and I was going to keep that. Truth be told, it hurt when she told me to leave. She couldn't talk to me, and that's not what friends were. She was always helping people out, always putting everyone else before her even when they didn't deserve it. And she couldn't even talk to me. She either must be really mad at me, or I don't even know what.

It felt like forever later, and it was probably only half a hour later, that Brooke came out. She looked ready to go somewhere, determination on her face. Determination for what? Knowing Brooke, she was probably going someone to distract herself, that was herself. And she probably wouldn't talk to anyone about this, or why she was crying. For some reason, i felt I was partially responsible for the reason of her tears, and my stomach twisted in a knot at this thought. I actually wanted to talk to her now, no matter if it was about the kiss or not. I hated seeing her like this and I wanted to help her, no matter what. But, what if it was me?

No. It couldn't be. Brooke clearly stated, long ago, she was over me. We were friends and nothing more, right? During all these thoughts, she unlocked her car, I saw her get her keys out. Never once did she look around or back, so she never noticed me. Even if I was parked in front, she didn't notice me until she was already in her car, pulling out of the driveway and almost onto the road. Her eyes widened a bit and her jaw dropped slightly; her jaw clenched, at least that's what I thought I saw. But I could never be sure.

After that, she took off, not giving another look back. Ouch. This just wounded my ego and for some reason, affected me more than it should. She was already gone and I turned the ignition on, going after her. I didn't care she didn't want to talk, she would, I hoped. I couldn't just let this, the kiss, her look; all go without knowing what happened. It took me a bit to figure out, because I was more focused on trying to keep up with her without actually getting so close to the car, that I noticed she was headed to her store. In record time, her car parked and she got out, slamming her car door and walking into her car. No look towards me or anywhere, again.

And following her suit, I parked in front, getting out and shutting my own door. First she kicked me out, then she sped away from me, all in trying to avoid me. This was getting ridiculous. I didn't even know what the hell I did!

Walking in, the door shut behind me and I saw go behind the counter, not bothering a look up. "God damn it, Brooke!"

She looked up then, her expression blank and she raised an eyebrow. Oh, now she plays the poker face card. "What?" she spoke, acting as if she had no idea. Bull.

"You very damn well know what I'm talking about." I wasn't going to play games. We were going to talk, about the kiss at least. And maybe, if I played my cards right, I could get into the mind of Brooke Davis. If only for a few moments.

Brooke sighed and pushed her hair behind her ear. I swear she was bi-polar if I didn't know her. First she was emotional, but she composed herself and was now acting all business-like. "Lucas, I have work to do. I have deadlines..."

"That's bullshit, Brooke and you know it. We both know Victoria took the company a couple weeks ago. You have no deadline." I knew I hit a nerve, because her eyes narrowed and she let out a breath, looking at the computer in front of her, but not doing anything. Maybe it was a bit much. Smooth, Lucas. Just great. Now she won't even probably talk to you. Just go see yourself out before you let your stupid thoughts come out of your mouth. But just before my common sense took over, she spoke.

"I don't want to talk about it, Lucas." she spoke softly. I knew she didn't mean she whole company thing, although, if I wasn't thinking, it would've been my first guess. But I knew that wasn't it. And what it was, I couldn't guess.

"Brooke," my toned was softened as well. I knew this was probably the first step, and I wasn't about to screw this up. "You can talk to me about anything. You know that." While I said this, I took a few steps forward. My position had been in the middle of the store and now, I was a couple feet away from the counter she was standing behind of. Instead of the computer, her face looked down and she bit her lip. Deliberating maybe, she shook her head softly.

"Not about this." She whispered and I don't know why, but again, it affected me more than it should've. "There are just some things better left unspoken of."

Maybe she was right, but I couldn't let it go. "And some things are. Trust me, Brooke." I took a step or two forward. She didn't move or glance up. "Brooke," I spoke her name softly. Still no response. "Come on, Brooke. Look at me." This was getting old. "Brooke, look at me."I repeated, a bit of edge to my tone. She either must've gotten tired of my saying that or she noticed the tone. Either way, she looked up, her face weary for whatever was coming next. "Brooke, talk to me. I know something's wrong. Don't deny it. I can see it in your face, your eyes. It gives it all away."

Brooke did something I didn't expect her to. She scoffed. "Yea, you're such a perfect reader. Bravo, care for a round of applause?" Was she PMS-ing? Jesus, she really must be bipolar.

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Brooke's POV:

These mood changes were actually quite fun. Ok, for those of you playing along, I had to be bitchy, sarcastic, and more importantly not as I was before. Or, five seconds ago really. I couldn't do that. I mean, with the whole tell-me-thing, I was about to crack. He sounded so sincere. And he probably was being just that. But I came to work to forget about him, if even for a minute. But he was here! In front of me. Talk about a bad day here.

"What the hell, Brooke? Are you ok?" He expression was confused, his eyebrows pulled together. I merely shrugged and nodded, crossing my arms over my chest.

"I'm perfectly fine. Why?"

He scoffed. "Other than the fact that you're acting like a bipolar bitch?"

I glared at him. OK, I knew i was acting like that, but he didn't need to make his observation out loud. Maybe a bipolar, or 'your mood swings are confusing me', or something.

"Well if it's bothering you so much, maybe you should leave and leave me and my bipolar bitchy self alone, huh?" I smirked a bit. I liked my comebacks so far.

Realization hit his face and he chuckled bitterly, shaking his head to the side once, then looked at me. "That's what you want, isn't it?"

I smirked again and nodded my head slowly, as if I was talking to a small child. "Yea. You finally caught on. You know, for a smart guy you can be pretty dumb." Ohh, burned.

Lucas rolled his eyes. "Just cut the act, Brooke. We both know this is just so I'll get annoyed and leave. It's not happening."

Ugh. Would this man ever give up? "Then what the hell are you doing here, Lucas? I'm not going to talk, we both know this. And you're not going to leave. It's going nowhere, admit it. And it's not going to go anywhere. That's the truth." He needed to go. Couldn't I just wallow in my pain alone? I guess not.

His eyes narrowed at me, those blue eyes pierced into my chocolate brown ones. Concentrate, Brooke. Don't get all emotional just because he's looking at you. "Brooke, talk to me. Please." He begged. Wait, he begged? Lucas almost never begged. I guess he really wanted to know. But he couldn't. No. He couldn't. This was something to be kept inside and only me, myself, and I would know about it. No one else. Right? Right.

I shook my head. "I can't, Lucas." I whispered softly. And with that, I turned around, my back facing him, and I faced the wall behind me. My eyes started watering again, there really was no way to stop the tears about to fall, I knew it. They were coming, and the best motion was to just not let him see me and pray he left. Please, God, let him leave before I spill my guts because I know if he stays and begs I will sooner or later. What was it about Lucas Scott? Hm? He always had every girl coming back to him. Me, Peyton, Lindsey, me. Was it his charm? His broody self? his eyes? What was it? I needed to know. That way, I could prepare myself. Well, I guess I should've done that earlier. Over and over I fall for him, and yet, every time he never takes notice. And every time it always catches me off guard. At first, he had been another number on the list of boys I slept with. He changed that. I had Felix, he changed that. I thought I was over him. He changed that as well.

Was there anything that was repellant to that man besides Haley and men?

I figured not.

"Brooke," he started again.

God damn it! He wanted to know the God damn truth? Fine, let him have it. Wait...It was too late. I had already turned around, my eyes were red, glossy and there were tears about to fall with two already down my cheeks. "You want to know? Fine. I'm in love with you, Lucas Scott. That's why I want you to get the hell out of my store. I love you and I can't do anything about it. You're in love with Peyton and always will be. I know that. But why I keep falling for you, don't ask me why. You can't help who you fall in love with, although I sure wish I could. You don't even know how hard it is now just to see you try and get me to open up when all along it's about you. I've noticed men are always much slower at getting things, but I was glad in this case. You didn't know, you thought it was something else. Julian, maybe? Victoria? Sam? No," I paused. The tears were openly flowing now. Rolling down one after another. My voice was quivering and almost impossible to understand from the crying I was doing. "No. It was you all along. Happy? Now you know." I sniffled; the tears kept coming. I revealed my most hidden secret I had only figured out yesterday. And why? All because the broody blonde had been saying 'please.'

My feet had a much better idea than my big mouth did. They headed straight for the door. It wasn't until I was outside that I realized my keys were sitting on the counter back inside the building. My eyesight was blurry but I wasn't going back in there. Besides, it probably would've been dangerous to drive like anyways. I took off running. I needed Haley at the moment. I couldn't tell Peyton, of course. Even if I could, Haley had been there standing on the sidelines and never had to be in there so she knew what it was like from a third person point of view. Plus she always knew what to say. So with this in mind, I ran, leaving Lucas behind. If in the store or outside, I didn't know. I wasn't looking back, because it would only be more painful than it was now.

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Review! :) Apparently, my being angry made a good chapter. Well, I'd say it was a good one. Leave me reviews to let me know what you think. And don't worry. Lucas is gonna figure out his true feelings soon. This is a Brucas story after all.

And so sorry for the long wait.