Yet another letter/Chapter up! This time "D"
Had a busy week so couldn't post earlier, but here it is =)

Beta reader: Ravanne

D – Dead

Set after "Wishful Thinking"

He hadn't told Dean what had happened while they were separated and Sam had gone off with Wes. How could he when he wasn't sure himself what had happened? Wes told him when they said their final goodbyes, but it didn't make a lot of sense. Sam had tried to cheer him up by explaining that someday Wes would find the right woman and it would be true love, thankful that Dean wasn't there because he would just go on and on how girly Sam is. Wes seemed upset about something a lot greater then just loosing his girlfriend.

"She killed you," Wes confessed, earning a perplexed look from Sam.

"Hope. She wished you dead. I'm sorry," he explained quickly, his face full of guilt and remorsefulness.

"It's okay. It wasn't your fault," Sam insisted before Wes had the chance to close his door again. "It wasn't your fault she wished me dead. Besides I'm alive again thanks to you,"

Wes gave him a tiny smile and a nod before entering his house and closed the door behind him.

Sam sighed. His body hurt like hell and his shoes were history. Dean hadn't even bothered asking what was wrong with them when they got back to the motel, just giving Sam a raised eyebrow before snickering.

"What you say we blow this joint, huh?" Dean asked, eager to get back on the road. Within fifteen minutes, their bag were in the trunk and the Impala was on the road, speeding past the town limits. Sam fell into a restless sleep in the passenger seat, small moans escaping his lips when he moved in his sleep, jarring his aching body. He felt awful, his lumbs burning with pain from the last movement. Clearly the lightening had left it's mark.

"Sam!" Dean's raised voice and a tight grip on his shoulder jarring Sam out of his restless sleep. Sam wanted to complain at being jostled, but could only whimper in pain.

"Are you okay?" Dean asked, sounding very worried. The Impala was still cruising down the empty road, but began to slow as Dean turned his attention to his brother.

"No!" Sam complained, more than a little bit of a whine coming into his tone. He sounded like a ten year old again to his own ears.

"Sammy, what's wrong?" Dean asked, growing increasingly concerned. Sam didn't normally complain unless it was really, really bad.

"Hope zapped me," Sam confessed, rubbing his neck.

"What do you mean, she zapped you?" Dean pulled the car over to the side of the road and stopped. "Like... how?"

The expression on his big brother's face would've been comical to Sam if it hadn't been for the fact that every single muscle in his body felt as if they'd been stretched to their limits, then snapped back like rubber bands.

"She wanted me dead so she wished a lightening out of a clear, blue sky," Sam bit his lip again as he tried to sit up more, only to collapse back against the seat before slumping over, his forehead coming to rest against Dean's thigh.

"Sorry," he mumbled embarrassed. He felt awful. Every inch of him hurt. Even his hair hurt. Slumped over as he was wasn't the most comfortable position, but resting against Dean somehow made him feel better.

"She what?!" Dean shouted, spooking Sam a bit. "What the hell do you mean, she zapped you?" When Sam groaned at being jarred, Dean took a deep breath and forced himself to calm down.

"Wes brought me back… Well, everyone obviously. Everything's back to normal" Sam sighed when he felt one of Dean's hands on the back of his head and the other on his back, checking for injuries. It didn't hurt as long as his brother was careful.

"She killed you?" Dean's voice became surprisingly soft and Sam knew right away that he had switched into big brother mode within seconds.

"I'm fine. I promise. It just hurts a little," Sam mumbled as he readjusted his position, but found out that everything hurt less when he laid down. Besides, he had missed his big brother and it made his hardening heart warm a bit.

"You're not fine if it hurts, moron," Dean pointed out. Sam stayed quiet while Dean ran a hand through his hair as if to check for wounds, before running his hand down his brother's back. Sam groaned when Dean pressed down too hard and his touch immediately gentled.

They were quiet for so long that Sam wondered if Dean had managed to reposition him without him noticing. Before he knew it, the car had started up again. Dean let him stay down? He would have expected his big brother to complain about personal space and help him sit up, but instead he felt a hand settle over his shoulder blades.

"Next time, tell me when you die and come back to life, okay?" Dean's voice penetrated the on-coming sleep Sam was falling into. He hear Dean huff a laugh,

"What?" Sam tried to raise his head a bit, but his neck protested painfully so he stayed where he was.

"I can't believe I just said that," Dean said, swallowing hard. Sam turned his head as much as he was able, and looked up at his brother. Dean didn't seem to notice his brother's attentions because the emotions that he normally hid were now plainly evident on his face. Sam couldn't remember seeing Dean this upset since...

Since the last time he died.

"I didn't want to tell you because you don't need more shit piled onto you. Besides I wasn't gone for more then a minute," Sam tried to reassure his brother, but he knew it wasn't working too well.

"Sam, I want you to be honest with me. You dying is never not a big deal," Dean said firmly. Sam thought that his brother would say something more, berate him for being an idiot and getting himself into trouble, but Dea fell silent, making it clear he didn't want to talk anymore. Dean kept one hand on the steering wheel, the other resting on Sam's back.

Sam relaxed when Dean didn't move his hand. It felt so good to feel close to Dean again. God, how he wish he could tell his brother everything, but he couldn't bring himself to do so. He wasn't proud of what he had done. He would tell Dean one day, just not yet. When everything was finished. When Lilith was dead and Dean was safe, he promised that Dean would know everything.

Right now he just wanted to rest here; although his body was bent awkwardly it felt good because he was there with Dean. He still sometimes could not believe that Dean was back. It was all Sam had wanted since Dean had gone to Hell. To get him back. For them to be brothers again. Instead Castiel, Dean's new best friend does it and everything seemed to fall apart between them. He shook his head a bit, blinking away tears before pressing his face into Dean's leg, taking what comfort he could. He would enjoy this moment he had with Dean, storing away a memory that he could only think as a good one despite the pain.

"Sorry," Sam finally muttered, eyes closed.

"Just go to sleep, Sam," Dean sighed.

"And we never talk about this again," he added a moment later with a soft snort and ruffled Sam's hair. "We get enough chick flick moments."

Let me know if you're interessted in more! =) Still a lot of letters left XD