Disclaimer-I don't own Glee or any songs/characters blah, blah, blah
Thank you so much for such a lovely and enthusiastic response to the first chapter, I hope you continue to enjoy the story as it progresses (I actually have a plan for this one lol)
Chapter 2-Don't Wanna Play That Part
The more time Kurt spent with Noah, the deeper he fell for him. At night, his mind teased him with sexual fantasies of the Jewish stud; fantasies that Kurt knew would never become reality.
He had thought his crush on Finn had been intense, but the feelings he once had for Finn were nothing to the new emotions he was experiencing for Noah.
It seemed that everything somehow led him to thoughts of the bronze-skinned boy. Every song made him think of Noah, the shapes of the clouds overhead all resembled Noah somehow. When Kurt went shopping, he'd see an item of clothing and instantly picture Noah wearing it.
Then when he was actually around the other teen, it drove him crazy with lust, want and desire. It took all of Kurt's self-control not to lean into the taller teen and thoroughly ravage him. He was also having to wear baggier pants since being around Noah so much left him with a semi-permanent hard-on.
Realising he was only torturing himself by spending so much time in Noah's company, being so close to the object of his desire but not allowed to touch, Kurt came to the decision to distance himself from the other teen.
If Noah invited him out somewhere after school, or asked him round just to do homework assignments or hang out, Kurt would make up various excuses as to why he could not attend. During school, Kurt tried to always make sure he was sat between two people at lunch time or in Glee club so that Noah could not sit beside him. And when Noah tried to make conversation Kurt would respond with one or two word answers before excusing himself. When the other teen called, he didn't answer, when he received texts, Kurt didn't reply. When Noah came round to his house and banged his fists upon the door demanding to know what had gotten up Kurt's ass, the small soprano ventured down to his basement and turned his music up as loud as it would go and cried to himself.
The other Glee members noticed Kurt pulling away from Puck too and they each went back and forth between both boys trying to find out what the problem was. However, Puck didn't know what was wrong himself and Kurt refused to answer. He wouldn't even confide in Mercedes.
Of course, Kurt could not avoid his friend forever. It was on a Wednesday afternoon when Kurt found himself pressed up against the dumpster with an angry looking Noah glaring down at him. For a moment, Kurt half expected the stronger boy to toss him in to the garbage pile as he had done so many times before back when they were bully and victim as opposed to friends.
"What have I done?" Noah asked, the angry glare diminishing somewhat until he merely looked helpless and insecure, like a dog that's been beaten.
Kurt lowered his eyes to the ground, not wanting to see the hurt that was shining in his friend's deep brown eyes.
"Hey," Noah spoke softly as he took a gentle hold of Kurt's chin and lifted his face up. "Look at me, babe."
At the word 'babe', what sounded suspiciously like a pitiful sob escaped Kurt's throat. The muscular boy had called him 'babe' so many times now, at first, Noah had started it as a joke since Kurt so detested being called 'dude', but somehow the word 'babe' had stuck and Noah used it often. Not that it meant anything special. Noah called all the girls in Glee 'babe', it didn't mean anything, yet that one syllable was like a stab wound to Kurt's heart every single time.
"Kurt?" Noah asked worriedly as he surveyed the slighter boy, noting how his blue-green eyes were sparkling with unshed tears. "What's going on? Has somebody hurt you? I'll smash their fucking faces in if they have."
Closing his eyes so he could blink the unshed tears away, Kurt shook his head before letting out a slow breath to calm himself. He couldn't let himself fall apart in front of Noah and he couldn't ever let the other boy know the truth about his feelings. Noah was straight, he liked girls. He'd never be able to reciprocate Kurt's feelings.
"I'm fine." Kurt lied.
"Right, and I'm Marc Jason." Puck drawled sarcastically.
"Jacobs." Kurt corrected automatically. "Marc Jacobs. I need to get home; my dad will wonder where I am."
Head held high in pseudo confidence, Kurt walked away from Noah, ignoring him when he called out to him to come back. Slipping gracefully into his car, Kurt turned on the ignition then switched on the music before driving home, thoughts of Noah once again polluting his mind.
To Kurt's dismay, he couldn't escape the gorgeous jock he was falling so madly in love with. It appeared that Noah had followed him home and his dad had let him inside, even though Kurt had expressly told the older Hummel that he didn't want to see anybody from Glee ever since the group had taken to randomly stopping by his house in the hopes of encouraging him to talk. However, it seemed that Noah had managed to convince Burt to let him in.
"I already told you that I'm fine." Kurt huffed.
"I know." Puck replied with a shrug as he invited himself further into Kurt's basement, looking completely at home as he kicked off his sneakers and slung his jacket on one of the bedposts. "And since you're so fine there's no reason why you can't hang with your best friend."
"Jerk." Kurt muttered.
"I try." Puck laughed as he flopped onto the bed beside the male diva. "Look, you don't have to talk if you don't want, but we are hanging out. Come on, we'll watch a movie, your choice."
With an overdramatic sigh, Kurt moved off his bed and selected one of the girliest films he owned, hoping that Noah would hate it enough to just get up and leave. Unfortunately, his plan backfired and Noah seemed to be fully engrossed in 'My Girl'.
By the time the film came to an end, Noah was crying like a baby and threatening Kurt with bodily harm if he ever told anyone. Unable to restrain himself, Kurt burst out laughing. The film had made him cry too, it always did, but seeing Noah cry over a film was completely hysterical.
"I mean it, you tell anyone and you're dead." Noah warned him as he wiped the last of his tears away.
"Rest assured that your secret is safe with me." Kurt replied as he took hold of the remote and turned the T.V off.
"Will you tell me what's bothering you now?" Noah asked as he shifted himself so that his head was resting in Kurt's lap.
"No." Kurt answered, hoping the other boy didn't hear the quiver in his voice.
With a slightly shaking hand, Kurt slowly began stroking Noah's head. When the other boy didn't tell him to stop or pull away, Kurt smiled slightly. He loved how Noah was so comfortable around him despite his sexuality. None of the other guys from the Glee club would allow Kurt to touch them like this; even Artie would have grown uncomfortable at this point.
"Hmm, that feels nice." Noah said appreciatively as he let out a small contented moan.
Kurt's hand froze. Hearing Noah moan like that went straight to his groin. If Noah moved his head back just the slightest bit he'd no doubt feel Kurt's arousal and then he'd more than likely freak out.
"Hey, babe, don't stop." Noah whined.
"You need to leave." Kurt told him and he pushed Noah's head off his lap then reached for his pillow to cover his erection.
"What? Why?" Noah asked looking round at him. "This is getting ridiculous now; just tell me what's going on."
"Please, Noah, just… just go." Kurt pleaded in no more than a whisper.
"Kurt, come on, talk to me." Noah begged but Kurt kept his eyes downwards. "Kurt?" Noah asked gently as he reached a hand out to place on Kurt's shoulder but the smaller boy shook it off. "Fine." Noah huffed in annoyance as he moved off the bed and grabbed his jacket before shoving his feet into his worn sneakers. "Be like that then you whiny little bitch."
Kurt winced at Noah's harsh words but he made no comment as he watched the Jewish boy stomp up the stairs then storm out of his basement bedroom, slamming the door behind him.
Once he was sure that Noah was gone, Kurt finally allowed the tears to fall. A few minutes later when Burt hesitantly stepped into his room, Kurt assured his father that the tears were merely the result of watching 'My Girl'. Whether the older Hummel believed the lie or not Kurt didn't know, but he didn't interrogate him about it any further and for that Kurt was grateful.
After tiring himself out by dancing through his entire Lady GaGa and Beyonce tracks on his iPod, Kurt took a quick shower before working through his nightly skin care routine then curling up in bed. As he struggled to find sleep, he longed for the days when he'd been a love-sick puppy for Finn Hudson, because the crush he once had on Finn didn't even compare to the pain of being in love with Noah.
The following morning, Kurt was horrified to discover he'd woken up later than usual meaning he only had thirty minutes to get ready for school. Bolting out of his bed, Kurt dived for his adjoining bathroom and hurriedly washed himself and cleaned his teeth before setting to work on applying moisturiser to his face, a touch of gloss to his lips and then combing his hair into his preferred style.
Moving quickly back to his bedroom, he made a quick decision to wear one of his favourite pairs of skinny jeans along with a tight fitting blue sweater that brought out the colour of his eyes. Hoisting his messenger bag onto his shoulder, Kurt grabbed a pair of black shades and slipped them onto his face before rushing up the stairs then out of the house and scrambling into his car.
Strapping himself in, he flicked on his music before driving the familiar route to McKinley High School, singing along with Beyonce as her voice filled the car.
"You're everything I thought you never were
And nothing like I thought you could have been
But still you live inside of me
So tell me how is that
You're the only one I wish I could forget
The only one I love to not forgive
And though you break my heart
You're the only one
And though there are times when I hate you 'cause I can't erase
The times that you hurt me and put tears on my face
And even now while I hate you it pains me to say
I know I'll be there at the end of the day…"
Looking out the car window, Kurt saw Noah driving alongside him in his truck. Turning his eyes back to the road, Kurt felt his heart bleed for the other teen.
"I don't wanna be without you babe
I don't wanna broken heart
Don't wanna take a breath without you babe
I don't wanna play that part
I know that I love you but let me just say
I don't wanna love you in no kinda way
No, no, I don't wanna broken heart
And I don't wanna play the broken-hearted girl
No, no, no broken-hearted girl
I'm no broken-hearted girl…"
Pulling up at a street light, Kurt turned to see Noah in his truck again. The other teen looked back at him with a scowl on his face before looking away. Feeling stung, Kurt pulled his eyes away from the boy he was desperately in love with and tried to take comfort in the fact that the scowl didn't quite reach Noah's eyes.
"Something that I feel I need to say
But up 'til now I've always been afraid
That you would never come around
Still I wanna put this out
You say you got the most respect for me
But sometimes I feel you're not deserving of me…" As he sang, thinking of Noah all the while, Kurt wondered if the other teen could hear him through the distance of their cars.
Giving it more thought, Kurt realised the probability of Noah being able to hear him sing was very small. There was too much traffic on the road and Noah probably had some heavy rock music of his own playing, or perhaps some country music that Noah insisted he hated but secretly loved.
Still, as Kurt continued to sing along with Beyonce, he imagined that he was on a large stage and singing to a one-man audience, that single audience member being Noah.
Even though the song wasn't totally fitting, Kurt wasn't a girl after all, but it did express a lot of how Kurt felt for the other boy. The lyrics didn't necessarily have to be applied to people in a romantic relationship either; it could easily be interpreted as a difficult friendship.
"And still you're in my heart
But you're the only one
And yes there are times when I hate you but I don't complain
'Cause I've been afraid that you would walk away…" Those two lyrics were ones Kurt really identified with. At times, he did hate his best friend, particularly when Noah would boast about having a hot date with some big-breasted blonde Barbie doll. Of course, Kurt had swallowed down his pain and jealousy, never telling Noah how he truly felt for fear of the other boy walking away from him in disgust.
"Oh, but now I don't hate you, I'm happy to say
That I will be there at the end of the day
I don't wanna be without you babe
I don't wanna broken heart
Don't wanna take a breath without you babe
I don't wanna play that part
I know that I love you but let me just say
I don't wanna love you in no kinda way…" Again, those lyrics were painfully true for Kurt. As much as his head protested, his heart stubbornly loved Noah Puckerman.
"No, no, I don't wanna broken heart
And I don't wanna play the broken-hearted girl
No, no, no broken-hearted girl…"
Turing his car, Kurt swerved into the school parking lot and pulled up. With a sigh, he switched his music off then collected his bag as he gracefully climbed out of the driver's seat. Shutting the door and locking the car, he turned about to see Noah slamming his truck door shut then swaggering up to the school building.
Following several steps behind the jock, Kurt continued to quietly sing not even finding it strange that nobody seemed to hear him other than the Cheerio girls who danced gracefully behind him as he followed an oblivious Noah through the corridors.
"Now I'm at a place I thought I'd never be, ooh
I'm living in a world that's all about you and me, yeah
Ain't gotta be afraid, my broken heart is free
To spread my wings and fly away, away with you
Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh, oh
I don't wanna be without my baby
I don't wanna broken heart
Don't wanna take a breath without my baby
I don't wanna play that part
I know that I love you but let me just say
I don't wanna love you in no kinda way
No, no I don't wanna broken heart
I don't wanna play the broken-hearted girl
No, no, no broken-hearted girl, broken-hearted girl
No, no, no broken-hearted girl, no broken-hearted girl."
Song finished, Kurt let out a sigh before pausing in the hall and watching Noah be swallowed up by the swarm of students and disappearing from sight.
To Be Continued
Song is 'Broken-hearted Girl' by Beyonce
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Love and hugs IQR xxx