Title: Trapped

Disclaimer: I do not own the mentalist... somehow I don't think you thought I did anyway.

Pairings: Jello, RigsPelt

Warnings: hm, bad words

Rating: T

Spoilers: None

AN: I want to make something very clear... I am not susceptible to the Jedi mind trick. The puppy dog eyes do me in every time, though... so here it is... the finally last chapter of my unintended series.

AN.5: Thanks to everyone who reviewed. Nata: yes sequel... thanks to you and AM... AM: I'm intending to use your prompts for a different project; I hope you're fine with that... waterbaby: I agree... that would certainly have worked. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Trapped

I can not believe this happened. This was NOT supposed to happen. Not to me any way. I was supposed to be sitting in my office, acting all oblivious to the suspicious absence of my consultant, while he was supposed to be sitting in this closet (for about 3 hours, Grace and I agreed on that beforehand) without anyone to annoy, pester, trick, badger, plague, harrow, ail, afflict, bedevil, bother or trouble.

"Lisbon?"

I close my eyes, take a deep breath and count to ten. "Yes, Jane?"

"Why are you so angry?"

"Jane, I'm sitting in a storage closet with you, instead of in my office without you... and you ask me why I'm angry?"

He raises his eyebrows, intrigued. "Why would you think that you'd be alone in your office? I might be in there, too, if I wasn't in here."

Oh shit... "Because it's almost 2pm and you usually take your midday nap around this time." Deep breaths, Teresa, don't blush, don't look away. He's gonna buy it. He's gonna buy it. He has to buy it... He's... grinning like the cat that got the canary.

"You didn't actually think that you and Van Pelt would be able to lock me into a storage closet all by myself unless I allowed you to do so, did you?" There's a devilish little glint in his eyes that makes me want to kiss him... hit him. Makes me want to hit him.

"You knew?" I'm skeptical. How could he have known? We planned this so carefully.

"Yes, of course." Smugness personified.

"You knew we were going to lock you into a storage closet all by your lonesome so that we could have a quiet day at the office...? Wait a minute... Was that a twitch I just saw?" I grin, elation floods me. "You were lying! You hade no idea whatsoever we were going to lock you in here!" And am I glad about it. It means that Grace and I managed to get one over on him at last. It also means he isn't as infallible as he might want to think.

"Well, yes, I didn't know you were going to lock me into a boring storage closet... I did however know that something was up the second I saw you clink paper cups in the SUV. AND I managed to not end up locked in here all alone, but with my favorite CBI agent."

Damn him.

I massage my temples, I can feel a major headache coming. And I've only been in here for 23 Minutes. It's gonna be 157 minutes till I can hope to be rescued.

"Lisbon?"

"Shut up, Jane!" I growl without looking up. Being in close proximity with him always makes me skittish, but this is way worse. Stuck in a small room with nothing to keep me occupied, no weapon (why did I foolishly leave it in my office?), no coffee and no food... with Jane, Hightower's golden (haired) boy. Nothing to keep me from thinking about all the things we could be doing in this storage closet. All the things that would be so much more interesting... so much more delightful... All the things that will never be because of my trust issues, his dead wife, and the rules that condemn both of us as delinquents if we so much as look at each other the wrong way.

"Lisbon? Lisssssbonnnn? Lis-bon? Li-li-li-li-li-lisbon?"

"SHUT. UP. JANE!" So much for being an adult and keeping my voice down. Maybe childishness is contagious.

"Make me." He doesn't yell, no, he has the nerve to whisper his challenge.

I stare wide eyed at him for a moment. Then I make my move.

JLJLJLJLJL

Meanwhile, outside the closet

"You think they're okay?" Rigsby's worried.

"They're fine. They're just... quiet." So is Van Pelt.

"It's just... are you sure they're okay? It's been almost four minutes and we all know Jane can't keep his mouth shut for that long." He's right about that one.

"I wonder what they're doing in there." No. You don't. You just don't realize that...yet. Time to put 'Prince Rigsby' and 'the Little Mermaid' out of their misery by telling them the obvious.

"They're either making out like high school kids or Lisbon is contemplating how to get rid of Jane's body." That said I return to my desk. I don't want to be caught anywhere near that closet when the boss finally makes her escape.

The end

AN: I assume everybody guessed whose point of view that last part was supposed to be ;) ... now, you know the drill... Reviews please... tell me what you think... oh also... I know I've been calling wolf for the last two chapters, but this is officially it. It feels good where it ended... I have an abandoned dark/serious version of this that I might update if I ever manage to write an ending for it... and I am planning on using AM's prompts from the last chapter for another project that will hopefully stop crowding my head (by being written) soon.