A/N: Here's the next chapter. Sorry if I'm jumping all of a sudden to after Blair and Chuck married to them graduating high school. If you're confused I'll join present day Chapters with flashbacks.Oh, and one noob-like question: Do we have to upload a different document for each chapter?

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6/15/09 – Blair's Realization

It was senior year. Blair had gotten into Yale. All was well.

Except for one thing. Nate.

Ever since she found out about Serena and Nate (and even before), Blair felt second in Nate's heart. Actually, since Nate realized Blair slept with Chuck before him, he rarely said anything to her. Blair and Nate's mom reconciled the two. But everyone ignored that. Yes, she loved Nate. Yes, she wanted to marry him. Yes, she had hoped to lose her virginity to him.

Loved. Wanted. Hoped.

As Blair was preparing for her graduation, she reevaluated her life. Good family, good friends, good education, shitty boyfriend.

She wanted something more. Something better.

Blair began thinking of a time in a relationship where she'd been happy, and first in the boy's heart.

Grimly, Blair thought of the one other person she'd been with (after her small crushes in elementary school, that is): Chuck Bass.

Blair felt tears coming on. All of a sudden all that was in her mind was her conversations with Chuck the year before, and, more vividly, the nights she had with him.

She didn't care about crying because it was graduation and everyone was supposed to cry.

Why Bass? A thought that kept cycling in Blair's mind. As soon as you left him and slept with Nate, he didn't want you then. There's no way in hell he's going to want you now.

Blair would stay with Nate; it was the only sensible thing to do. Blair would give up her happiness and settle.

Well, fuck sensible. Blair wanted to smile when someone mentioned her love life. Blair wanted to feel at ease when her boyfriend, or fiancé, or husband went to work. Blair wanted someone to love her.

Blair wanted Chuck.

6/15/09 – Serena's Graduation Party

Blair sighed and took a sip of champagne. She wasn't sighing because she was leaving her friends, or that the champagne tasted cheap. It was because her fascination with Chuck would have to end.

Chuck made it loud and clear a year ago that he was done with Blair. They had both moved on—Blair with Nate Take 3 (Take 3 being an estimate; it's probably Take 50 by now) and Chuck with God knows how many girls.

Still. She wanted him. What Blair wants, Blair bitches and fights until she gets.

Blair set out for Chuck. She scanned the room for what seemed forever. Finally, she spotted him sitting at the bar. No surprise.

She walked slowly towards him through the crowd. They hadn't talked much since everyone found out about their affair. A congrats when they both gotten into the college of their choice, a joke about Serena when she came down with the flu and was as demanding as her mother. But that's as far as their interactions had gone. It's not that they had that much anger toward each other; their conversations just weren't the same.

"Martini, dry." Blair ordered, hoping to get the taste of that champagne out of her mouth (but more importantly to get Chuck's attention). She sat on the stool next to Chuck's.

"Make it two." She heard his voice.

Blair smiled and turned to face him. "Sick of brandy, Bass?"

"I'm making it my point to drink every possible concoction in the world tonight." Chuck playfully informed. It was hard to hear with everyone talking, but Blair strained to listen. They got their drinks.

"Oh, really?" Blair took a sip between sentences. "I'd think it'd be hard to find a six pack of beer here."

Chuck grinned. "This is Serena's party, remember?"

Blair chucked genuinely. She was still unsure how to get him alone. "Well, how many drinks have you downed so far?" she continued small talk.

"Only three: brandy, champagne, and the martini. It's kind of a slow night." Good. He wasn't that drunk.

Before he could finish his drink, Blair piped in. "Can I…speak to you? Somewhere, where I can hear myself think?" she didn't know how to say it.

Chuck wasn't expecting that to come out of Blair's mouth. "Sure, this party's boring me already." His tone was a tad uneasy.

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They settled in Serena's bedroom. Both have been there numerous times with each other, but this time made them both nervous. Blair sat on the bed while Chuck decided to remain standing.

Blair took a deep breath. Her plan stopped at getting Chuck alone, and she was improvising from there. "I…don't know how to put this." She looked at him with glistening eyes. She swallowed, and looked down at her twiddling thumbs. "Nate doesn't love me. I know this. I've known for a while. And, even though I'm only 18, I think I deserve someone who wants me." Her hands became blurry to her, and she refused to look up at him. "Bass, you're the only one who ever did want me. I know what you said last year and I know I was awful to you, but…" she trailed off, and finally looked up.

Chuck was leaning against Serena's dresser, looking out the window. He was lost for words. His glance met hers. "You're crying." He whispered, astonished.

Blair was embarrassed, and wiped her eyes. "Yeah, guess so." She stood up and started toward him. "I guess I have the butterflies now." she laughed.

Chucked wasn't that amused, but he smirked as if he was.

She reached him. "God, I'm an idiot. I'm so sorry for doing this." She turned her head and saw Manhattan outside. "I guess…I just wanted something better. But we can't always get what we want." That was the first time Blair even thought about those words, let alone say them.

"Maybe you can."

Chuck took her face to his and kissed her.