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Chapter Three - Saturday in Hogsmeade

Suzer,

Greetings from a faraway land! You'll have to forgive me for not writing in the past eon. I've been so busy helping our dearest Gred and Forge with the shop that I barely have time for myself any more. You really ought to visit it sometime. Perhaps over the Christmas holidays. I may have some discounts up my sleeve for you, but don't tell anyone!

How is seventh year treating you so far? I really hope you're not freaking out over your grades. Don't worry about them; everyone is at a failing point in at least a few of their classes once or more in seventh year. It's hard, but I think you can do it. Is Katie good? Are you still arseing around with McLaggen? He's mad as a bag of ferrets, I'm telling you. I don't know how you can stand to be with someone who has such an enormous head.

Do you remember meeting my sister Naomi a few years back? Well, she and her two daughters moved in a week ago. Someone totally destroyed their house. I think Death Eaters did it, but Naomi hates it when I talk like that. At least you and I know the truth. I wish she'd stop trying to deny what's right in front of her face, but I guess nobody wants to believe that…yeah. What Harry Potter said. I don't think I need to go into detail about that.

Also, that package contains some Puking Pastilles. The orange pieces make you vomit enough to leave class, and the purple ones make you better. Just in time for the school year, don't you think? Not that you're going to use them, Head Girl! Congratulations on that, by the way. I always knew you were too much of a goody two-shoes to not get that badge.

Write back soon, alright?

-Lee

Dear Lee,

I was wondering where you'd run off to! It's okay, I understand. I'm so excited for you and the dynamic duo. Are you so sure it was a good idea to send the Head Girl some Puking Pastilles, though? Weasley's Wizard Wheezes products are banned at Hogwarts. Oh, well. I suppose I won't tell anyone as long as I'm getting discounts! However, I must agree…I don't think I'll be using them either, but probably for a different reason than you're thinking of.

Seventh year is not very difficult so far, but it's steadily getting harder. I usually do my assignments during the evening, so I have all the time in the world during free period. Would you believe me if I told you Professor Snape finally got that Defense Against the Dark Arts post he's wanted for the past…I don't know, billion years? It's true! He says a lot of frightening things in his class, and he has the most horrible pictures on the walls. The Potions teacher is some man named Slughorn. Apparently he was a professor here way back in the day.

I think Katie is doing fine, but we're not really friends anymore. As for Cormac, yes, I suppose we're still together, but I'm not positive, seeing as we haven't spoken in a week.

I remember Naomi! Tell her I said hello. It's a shame that happened, but at least everyone is alright.

However, I would rather not talk about…things that are going on in our world…over mail. Actually, I have a lot of explaining to do, as you can see. I have some very big news to tell you, but I would prefer to say it face-to-face. There's a Hogsmeade trip on the seventeenth. Do you think you can meet me in The Three Broomsticks at half past one?

-Suzer

"…and apple cider for the lady."

A hand came out of nowhere and placed a tall glass on the wooden table in front of me. Lee Jordan sat beside me, dreadlocks sticking up in wild directions, wearing a shirt that was much too big for him. He grinned at me. "Is apple cider still your favorite drink? I wasn't sure, but Butterbeer probably isn't good for you right now, you know. Not that I know anything about anything…No, you keep your Sickles! It's on me."

I brought my hand back into my pocket and deposited the two silver coins in there, not surprised in the least. Lee was always very generous.

A few weeks had passed since I'd found out about the baby; I was now officially two months pregnant, which meant that the baby had graduated from an embryo to a fetus. I still didn't like the fact that I was expecting, but slowly, I was getting used to it. I had no other choice. The morning sickness, the constant need to eat and sleep, and the knowledge that an alive something was in my stomach were all part of my daily routine.

That didn't make it any easier, however. Though Madam Pomfrey constantly assured me that I had seven months to decide, I still had no idea if I was going to keep the baby or give it to someone else. I didn't want to do this, especially alone; I hadn't been able to talk to Cormac ever since I found out about the baby. I told myself he was busy practicing for Quidditch team tryouts, but I wasn't stupid and I wasn't fooling anyone, especially myself. He wanted nothing to do with me or this baby, but I wanted to give him a second chance. It had to be hard on him, too.

If I said it enough, I could almost believe it.

Katie and I still were angry with each other, and it was only in her absence that I realized how very little friends I had at Hogwarts. It wasn't because I was rude to anyone; I'd just never been much of a social butterfly. With no Katie and no Cormac, I spent all of my time alone. Miserable did not even begin to cover it. I needed support now more than ever, and I had none.

People were beginning to get over the scandal of me being pregnant, but the hateful words did not cease. The girls at school made me feel like dirt. I tried to put on a strong face, and I did…during the day. At night, the thoughts came to me in waves. Maybe what they were saying was true; maybe the calls of 'Get out of my way, slag!' and other terrible things were deserved. After so many nights of crying myself to sleep, I was amazed there were any tears left in my eyes.

The better news was that now, for the first time in two months, I was visiting with my good friend, Lee Jordan. I was almost as close with him as I had been with Katie. We'd become friends when I was in my fourth year, he in his fifth. He was great friends with Fred and George Weasley, and the five of us (if one was to include the occasional Katie) spent almost all of our time together. After he'd graduated last year, he'd even moved into a cottage near Diagon Alley to help out with their new joke shop. I really appreciated having them in my life. They always made me laugh, and knew just the right things to say to cheer me up - a bit like Lee was doing now, as we sat in The Three Broomsticks on a rainy Saturday afternoon.

"Well, think of it this way," he said, waving around his mug of Butterbeer enthusiastically. "At least he or she won't come out looking like a freak. Oh, wait, did I say freak? I meant Pansy Parkinson. Oh well, it's the same thing."

"Lee! That's awful!" I scolded, though I wasn't so fond of Pansy myself. She and a few of her Slytherin friends, including Draco Malfoy and Blaise Zabini, were making a ruckus at a nearby table.

"I know she is, after all she's been saying about you. You don't need to pay any attention to her. She's wrong on so many levels; you aren't a lesser person just because you're pregnant." Lee reached out to pat my hand reassuringly, covering it in sticky Butterbeer. It was a friendly gesture, but of course I heard a few of the Slytherin girls say it was something more in a far less pleasant way. "Actually, it's very special to be like you are now. That dope McLaggen doesn't know anything - and neither does Katie. If they did, they would realize that being there for you is what you really need right now. But don't worry - you know I've got your back, no matter what you do."

I thought about what he said, and tears of joy filled my eyes as he smiled. The movement felt foreign on my face. Though I was uncomfortable with the words he said about Cormac, it was good to know that I had at least one friend left in the world. "Thanks, Lee."

He waved his hand at me dismissively. "Oh, don't worry about it." We sat in silence, him gulping down his Butterbeer while I sipped tentatively at my apple cider. I looked around, feeling eyes on the back of my head, and was surprised to see Draco Malfoy staring at me. I could tell he didn't really see me, however; his mind was elsewhere. In fact, he was so distracted that when he stood up to leave, he didn't realize he knocked over his full mug of Butterbeer onto the floor. His friends exchanged glances before they stood and followed him out of the Three Broomsticks.

Seeing the mess he'd left bothered me; I was very neat by nature and I hated to see someone take such sloppy actions. I pulled my wand out of my pocket to clean it up, seeing as no one else seemed to have noticed, but the charm running through my head did nothing. I panicked; what was wrong with my wand? I looked at it, trying not to start freaking out, and watched in bewilderment as it turned into a rubber chicken and began an Irish step dance routine.

I laughed. For the first time in weeks, I laughed, and it felt incredible.

"Seven sickles at Weasley's Wizard Wheezes," Lee announced.

As it usually happened when I was around Lee, I wished I could give him something back - something nice that he'd really appreciate and be surprised by. He was so kind to me. I tried to do all that I could to be as much of a friend to him as he was to me, but I sometimes worried that I wasn't good enough. I didn't do everything right like he did, but at least I listened.

After Lee and I finished our drinks, we trudged through the pouring rain and arrived in Hogsmeade's book store with our shoes covered in mud. The shelves towered far above my head precariously, looking as if they would tip over at any second. The walking space in the rows was narrow; I could barely fit my way through. It was empty in here, save for the cashier, who was talking on a Muggle felly-tone, and a hassled-looking mother with two small children. I couldn't help but stare as she tried to get them to quiet down without success.

Would that be me, one day seven months from now? One of the children was begging for a thin book that had a drawing of a hippogriff on the front cover, but the mother just looked upset as she turned it over. "Sorry, honey. I'm four Sickles short. It'll have to wait for another time."

I couldn't just stand there and not do anything with the knowledge that I could help her, so I walked over to her. She looked up at me, looking at first annoyed and then confused. "Oh, hello," the mother said. "Are we in your way?"

"No, not at all. That's a good book," I replied, nodding towards the paperback her son was holding, having recognized it from my childhood. I pulled four Sickles out of my pocket. "I hope he likes it." The expression of joy that spread across their faces had me smiling as well when Lee and I left the store. I'd bought two books: the first, Your Guide to the Wild Ride of Pregnancy. I got the feeling I would need it; even if I didn't keep this baby for myself, I knew it was important to know what was going on with it. The second one I'd been wanting ever since it was released a few weeks prior, called You Should Really Take the Time to Read This Book if You Want to Be a Great Magizoologist. I knew it would help me out in Care of Magical Creatures class and my possible future career, and anyway, I just liked to read.

The rain was still coming down hard, but I felt good about my life in that particular moment. For once, I was…happy. I wasn't so very alone; I had Lee. At least he would offer a helping hand through this pregnancy, and that was all I really wanted from him. As we ran through the rain, me laughing at Lee when a river of water slid off of a roof and splashed all over his head, I was blissfully unaware of the events occurring at that moment in time, events that would change my life forever.

A nervous pair of silver eyes watched me from a window, the owner pulling his platinum blonde hair away from his face. Miles away, Bellatrix Lestrange broke down a front door and pulled out her wand.