Bella at 13
"And then we dissected the live frog. I really was not a big supporter of taking its life, but it was required for the assignment." Bella kicked around dirt and rocks, as she shared her afternoon with the creature.
"You do not like killing animals?" The creature sounded intrigued, inclining that he would be filing this information away for later use.
"Killing animals senselessly? No, I am not happy to do so. But, we must eat animals to stay alive. My mother tried to teach me the ways of a person who doesn't eat meat, but having tofu was one of the most unpleasant experiences of my life."
The creature chuckled, amused by an inside joke that he will not share with Bella. "So only for survival?"
"Yes, for survival, it is a must."
"Dearest Isabella, it fills me with joy that you feel that way." The creature sounded like he could jump to the moon with the amount of joy he resonated.
Bella couldn't comprehend why her eating habits would be something to celebrate, but oh how she loved it when he did. Nothing pleased her more than to keep the creature happy.
A few days after her thirteenth birthday, Bella made that change. She had remembered being taught this was common among girls her age, but the shock was still there when she saw the spot on her bed sheets before school one morning. The incident triggered memories of her stumble in the woods, but instead of encapsulating the red on white as pain, she saw it as a growth. And in the pit of her stomach, growing up sounded like the kind of event she had been hoping for.
After that unavoidable morning, Bella was now a girl in her blossoming years. Those years where you look at things how you would for the rest of your life. All that seemed unimportant before, now were all one girl could think about.
While Bella kept her school priorities and much loved hobbies in check, but boys made a welcomed appearance in the overall picture. She loved how their shirts fit them, highlighting their naturally stronger upper bodies. The way their height loomed over her and how she was forced to crane her neck upward to catch a glimpse of their faces. Oh how could she have not noticed such striking features before? Where had she been the past thirteen years?
It didn't escape her attention that her mother would check up on her more often than not when she was on the phone with an admirer. However, the house that she resided in gave away one's intention of walking down the hall or up the stairs.
"Yes…oh I would love to know." Bella bit her lip, stifling a giggle from a boy she talked with on the other end. "Please tell me what it is you would love to ask me."
"Bella, may I ask you out on a date?" Michael, one of her classmates, asked her without mumbling or fumbling his way through it.
A short knock vibrated off of Bella's door. She sat up quickly, cradling the phone close to her chest. "Come in." She announced. It no longer peeved her when Renee stopped by to take a peek that her daughter was not misbehaving.
"Bella, I've made peanut butter and chocolate chip cookies if you would like some."
"Yes, I would. I will be down in a smidge." She beamed an innocent smile, hiding the trouble she might be in.
Renee silently closed the door. Bella waited for her mother's footsteps to creak and disappear, before she returned to her conversation. "Yes, Michael. I would love to go on a date with you."
"How does eight o'clock on Saturday sound?"
"Sounds perfect." Bella didn't contain her happiness; she would be on a real live date with a boy, one whose name she knew and knew where he resided. Not one who kept to himself and never let her say a word pertaining to him. She promised long ago to remain silent about her prying, but that didn't make it any less annoying to keep it at bay.
"Goodbye, Michael. I will see you at school tomorrow." As soon as she hung up her phone, an all too familiar figure appeared before her.
"What about the creature in the woods?" Annabelle graced Bella's room from the end of her bed.
Bella had thought Annabelle would phase out of her mind at the point of her impending teenage years, but this did not come to be. In fact, Annabelle appeared more often and stayed for long periods of time.
What kind of a girl had an imaginary friend beyond her years of adolescence? Bella was embarrassed for herself.
"Him? Why would he have anything to be concerned about? He is no more than a friend and would be delighted in this development." Bella ascended from her bed to feed the warbler that had long resided in the corner of her room. The little warbler's beak received a handful of nuts from her hand.
"The creature will be hurt that you are abandoning him." Annabelle always had a soft voice; honey would line up to know its secret. "He is fragile."
Bella continued to dodge the conversation and ultimately, what her deepest emotions were. "Fragile? If there is one adjective I would associate with him, that would not be one of them."
"Then what is your view on the creature?"
Bella bitterly smiled at Annabelle, even though she could have no satisfaction of Annabelle's face viewing it. "View? Why must you openly mock me? The only view I've ever had of him was a dream from four years ago that you have been aware of. And I wasn't graced with any other feature but his hand."
The details of Bella's dream slowly faded with time, but the way it made her feel had not. She blushed as red as a begonia when she thought of how he treated her amongst it all.
"If you give him time, he will show you his intentions."
"Time is always the issue. But, what if time is what I haven't got?" Bella opened up one of her bird guides, caressing the page with a picture of a spinus tristis, the American goldfinch and state bird of Washington.
Their presence was common, Bella spotting one almost everyday from a branch outside her high school. Luck surged through her for knowing a beautiful bird up close on regular occasion.
She memorized the many color changes the birds acquired through the cold and warm months, the breeding and non-breeding times of the year. The adult male's coats were bright yellow, competing with the sun with its luminosity. The female's coats were a less attractive shade of gold with olive tones.
They were allowed to change their feathers, so why couldn't Bella?
"And if you disagree with who I am partaking on a social event with, I boldly suggest you keep opinions of an offensive nature to yourself. Or you can depart at any time." Bella turned around to glance at Annabelle's reaction, but she had gone.
Bella had high hopes that this would become a more permanent solution.
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Bella scoured many establishments for the most perfect of perfect outfits for the first date she would venture on.
Her mother had agreed to a late afternoon shopping excursion to assist her daughter. Bella remembered how Renee felt when she approached her upon seeking out clothing options for her date.
"Bella, you have a date?" Renee gently questioned her.
"I do, mother. His name is Michael and we are taking in a movie. And if you so do agree, a trip to the ice cream parlor following the film." Bella radiated excitement as bright as Christmas tree lights.
"Why yes, ice cream afterward is perfectly fine." Renee hugged her daughter close to her.
Bella knew that her mother would never address it, but she could see the concern in her eyes. She was aware that she was not a social butterfly and any sense of normalcy for a teenage girl, attending a social occasion such as a date, was a step in the right direction.
A girl should not spend time alone in her room completely immersed in books on birds or spend hours exchanging conversations with a figment of a friend.
And a girl all by her lonesome certainly never explored the woods for endless hours at a time.
Renee handed her pile after pile of cupcake colored dresses. Bella must've zipped up and wiggled her way into every cotton, chiffon and taffeta dress in the store. There were frilly lacey garments that made her look too doll-like and ones so short they threatened to be shirts.
Bella desired for pretty.
"Bella, I think I found the one. I had to fight with the saleswoman to remove it from the mannequin, but I believe it is worth it."
Bella cradled the dress from Renee's hands. Stepping into the dressing room, she slipped the garment over her head. Tightening the thin straps and smoothing the wrinkles of the skirt, she rewarded the mirror with a smile.
Bella had never felt lovelier. The skirt floated around her as she spun. Spinning and spinning until equilibrium could no longer hold her in place. Her rear met a bench as she toyed with the fabric.
Oh the beauty of being a girl! Bella could not possess enough of it.
After purchasing the outfit, Bella decided to wear it the rest of the afternoon. Including on her daily journey to visit her creature. Her creature? When had she claimed possession of him?
Bella took notice of the way her body stirred when she ran. Her hips swung with more intent. Her chest, once desolate and of no concern, bounced underneath the smocked fabric of her dress. She delighted in these new developments.
Out of breath, she graced the familiar surroundings. She was far too content to sit on her rock. And it would mark her dress, a non-necessity for such a beautiful garb.
"Creature? Oh Creature are you here?" Bella bellowed out, spinning in endless circumferences. "Do you think it splendid on me?" Bella twirled an end of her hair. Her teeth shyly met her lip, wishing the creature would not embarrass her. Or worse, think she not hold a candle of beauty to don it.
The creature stepped out from behind his tree. The air waited for his response, waiting to send Bella's destiny her way.
"You are a vision." The steadiness of his stalliant tenor had been disrupted by Bella's new womanly presence.
Bella permeated absolute elation. "I am relieved this is your opinion. For a moment, my heart skipped that you think it not correct on me."
"There has been nothing more right or beautiful on anyone since this world began."
"Creature, surely you don't think it that grand on me." She would never deny that his words filled her with unbridled happiness, but there is to be a limit one person could stand with compliments such of this caliber. Such definitive statements imposed doubt on her.
"The fibers that fit your skin should never grace another human being. The hands that endured tears and blisters, stabbing needles that stung their fingers, knew only such a fair beauty as you would wear this some day. There has been no other element or live thing on this Earth that has sheathed themselves in attire as ardently beautiful as the wearer themselves."
Bella could not successfully shield her smile. There had been no words before that ignited the intense blush that invaded Bella's cheeks.
"Why Creature I am most humbled by your opinion of me. I do take--" Bella could not finish the sentence she had begun.
A delicate brush of air, as light as a breeze from the wings of a bird, slinked along her arm. But it would not be an act of nature that would whisper against her skin forthcoming.
Slowly, a finger, wrist, hand white as snow entered her blurry vision.
The flimsy tie strap of her yellow dress had fallen from her shoulder in all her previous exuberance. The stunted feel of the hand on her, chilled the tender curve of her bare shoulder.
She glanced wondrously at the retreating hand, meeting the out of focus eyes of the creature.
Then, there was a flash. A brief flash. This briefest of moments returned her sight to normal for what couldn't have been more than a second. The creature had no longer possessed the amber eyes she had only caught a tiny glimpse of when he allowed her to be close. Instead, they were an unmistakable green. A marvelous candy apple green. His face of a beauty she felt her eyes could not carry or even have the privilege to have known. He was of striking youth, shining it brilliantly on her.
And his attire was not that of the simple button up shirt and dress pants he often wore. Oh how she reveled in the time he permitted her to place her hand on his clothed body. The fabric of his royalist of blue shirts had lain smooth on his body and hugged curves that had only previously been sculpted on the finest of statues.
But these clothes that Bella had seen…they were of a decade of yore. When men wore suits designed for them. A time when men were required to stand up from their seat when a lady arrived. The years when the world had begun to endure a long battle with itself.
The creature was a crystal clear image of that time long ago, as Bella's hand felt the delicate touch of his lips to her hand. Bella blushed brighter than before. Had there been a time, place, moment or interval when blushes counted before this one?
But how could this event have passed?
Why had this moment felt ingrained in her bones from long ago?
Her fuzzy vision returned, her breath catching in her throat. What had come to pass between them?
Bella gripped her chest, struggling to keep her racing heart steadfast. Shakily, she exhaled the small amount of air that had settled in her lungs. "I have to go." She whispered to the Creature as she fled to her house, leaving the Creature in a quick haste.
What had her mind shown her? She could not protest what her eyes had seen, but what was it?
Bella, her dress still as pristine as prior, nervously smoothed out the fabric and waited for eight o'clock to roll around from the couch in her living room.
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"That movie was far worse than I had ever expected." Michael recanted to Bella why the film they had taken in not mere minutes ago was one of the foulest he had ever seen. "I didn't understand why there had been no connection made between the two characters. They had barely uttered a word to one another and…"
Bella was in no desirable mood to explain the concept of irony and subtlety. The inner recesses of her brain had long ceased processing what he was saying. She only possessed the urge to mutter small words of agreement or disagreement the entire evening with him.
This had transpired the moment she was with Michael on their date.
And why was it like that you may ask? It seemed fair Bella Swan could not escape the entire event that had taken place in the forest.
Throughout the length of the film, she could scarce hear a word the actors were saying to one another on screen. There was no room in her brain to share a thought with this less than timeless film when Bella could only think about the Creature.
Her Creature.
But was Creature the right name to claim him by?
Creature implies terror and horror, when this was not what she thought of him as. What other name shall she give him?
He was of a human quality that was absolutely certain. The hand and face that could've only belonged to him were unmistakably of a being like herself.
But his hand? It was all but frozen; reminiscent of a temperature of ice than the warmth of human skin. And the pliability of the skin was not remotely of human epidermis.
His fingers had glided along her arm, burning a secret path only she could feel. Her heart fluttered at the memory that would never leave. She exhaled, dreamily soaking herself in a moment she cared not to give up.
"Your enlightenment is of celebration, Bella. Go forth and treat yourself tonight." Annabelle skipped ahead of Bella as Michael and she continued their stroll to the ice cream parlor.
Bella attempted to silence Annabelle, discreetly placing her finger to her lip.
"Bella, why must you continue to be in the company of this boy? There is no need to go on with him. He is not the one who has your mind, let alone your heart." Annabelle prattled on and on, which frankly made Bella wish any and all association with Annabelle end.
"…I do think the chocolate is the far superior choice than any other flavor." Michael glanced up at the hand written, chalk board with all of the flavors the parlor churned out every day.
When had Bella entered the parlor? She couldn't recall a door opening for her or even the vastly different light source from outside. Was she so deep in thought that all surroundings had disappeared?
"Bella, what flavor do you care for tonight?" Michael inquired to Bella.
"Hmm?" Bella snapped out of her revere. "Strawberry sounds like a scrumptious choice tonight." Bella didn't care much to eat, but Michael had been gracious and she felt it unfair to leave him the only one with sustenance to enjoy.
"Are you not well at the moment?" Michael placed his hand on her shoulder, attempting to set comfort in her.
But placing his hand where there had been one of significance mere hours ago was not a wise choice.
"Bella? Is something the matter?" Michael waved his hand in front of Bella's eyes, receiving no response that would reassure him.
Michael shook her fiercely, pulling her from a black hole daze that one could be lost in forever.
Bella looked to her suitor, searching her surroundings and familiarizing herself once again. "I…excuse me."
Faster than Michael could catch up to her, Bella ran. She dropped the cone topped with artificial strawberry ice cream at his feet, as he watched her go.
Bella's sandaled feet hit the pavement of downtown Port Angeles with force. The wind swept her hair in angry, sharp waves. The skirt of her dress never knew whether to obey the rules of nature or Bella's angry hands that fisted the fabric.
"Bella, have you but all forgotten I have no sight?" Annabelle appeared at a heart stopping pace in Bella's path. "There is no need to run from anything, but run to? Then yes, you may continue."
Tears formed and threatened to fall down her cheeks, but Bella could not force her eyes to close. She was frightened, too scared to think what would happen next.
Then, a distant voice in the back of her brain screamed at her, pushing familiar moments against the membranes of her mind. Bella's hands pressed the sides of her head, hoping simple counter pressure would be the cure.
Bella's eyelids fluttered rapidly. With each flap, a new image of the creature played back to her like a film from a hand crank toy. His lips formed in a devastating smile only for her. Her hands finally touching the autumn tinted locks that begged to be brushed from his face. Short-lived segments of small gestures and gracious tokens of…of what?
A premonition? A dream? A tale she had experienced long ago? What was being shown to her?
Desperate to feel reality again, Bella stumbled into an alley way. She grasped along the brick wall, her nails biting and scraping. She trudged to the beacon of light above a side door leading to a Mexican restaurant.
Bella opened her mouth to project her pain and frustration, but her voice could not be found. That baseball size lump in her throat prevented anyone from helping her relieve it. Droplets of rain did find her tongue as she tilted her head to the stormy skies.
"There is no need to scream. There is nothing scary about what is being shown to you." Annabelle followed behind the snails pace Bella.
"It is not the images that fuel the pain, but the process." Bella wailed to the dry clothed imaginary girl. Rain took over where tears would not fall from Bella's cheek. "Please make it stop. My head can not endure it anymore. Please."
Oh the agony that anchored itself to every crevice of her brain!
Bella could not find a human torture method to compare it to. Her skull, like that of the outer shell of a childhood teddy bear, filled with soft, pliable cotton. Her mind struggled to relieve the pressure of the excessive stuffing. She was sure she could hear the fake fur expand, reaching its maximum capacity, the threads that held the delicate toy together shredding and fraying. But there was no escape that could be found; the fluffy filler had entrenched every curve and recess. Oh why must this normally innocuous play thing create a horrific image in her mind. Bella could only wish that the pain would end, even if it means her life shall expire early.
"You are not about to receive death! Why must you think that? Bella, this is not what is planned for you." Annabelle drilled that this was of an innocent nature what was happening to Bella ad nauseam. She portrayed desperation, holding onto a thread of hope of some kind. "This is not torture! This is not what is intended! Please cease from thinking that!"
Bella's feet could not bear her weight anymore. She tripped on an invisible obstacle in the polluted, possibly disease infested cement. She crashed into the brick building face first, the sting of the grainy, grimy cement blocks sliding along her forehead. A long, jagged mark formed where once there was unmarred skin. Blood glistened down the bridge of her nose, rain diluting it like red watercolor paint.
Annabelle disappeared from Bella's vision, as Bella felt the symptom of sleep take over her. The last thing Bella could gather from her memory was the set of hands lifting her from the dirty dingy floor of the alley way.
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Cottony warmth wrapped her exhausted body. The lilacs printed on her comforter filled Bella's sight. The warbler in her corner sung soft and low. She had been placed back in her bedroom. The once cherished, charming yellow dress still encapsulated her body, but the dirt and mud from her fall to the ground forever stained the girly fabric.
In seconds, Bella felt a whoosh of remembrance. She had cut her forehead open, the loss of blood animating in her mind instantly. While the wound was merely a scratch, the thought and sight of losing such an important vital filled her with unease. Her hand met the bandage that had been smoothed along the cut.
Aching to rid the night attire she had yet to be changed out of, she stepped into her bathroom to adorn her nightgown. There was no energy left in Bella to attempt to cleanse her body that night.
She did address the soiled gauze on her cut. Peeling it off her forehead, she winced at the dark line running across it. The water that had been run in the sink, swirled and clinked around Bella's hands as she scooped up the warm water to bring to her face. Her wound was washed clean as gauze was applied once more.
With a heavy heart, Bella returned to her bed. When she cast her eyes at the blanket in front of her, she was surprised that not only had the bed been smoothed out and made, but an envelope sat between the two sets of pillows she laid her head upon.
Her name had been written in the fanciest calligraphy Bella had ever read. Bella lifted the unsealed flap and read the note inside.
'I am sorry, Dearest Isabella. The events that have occurred on this such night were of a consequence you are unaware of. They have taken place in a manner that was far more full of fright than had been intended. Our future relies solely on my keeping you in the dark. My past however, seeks to test my patience. But fear not, Isabella, I fear along with you.
Your mother and father were not at home when you were returned. They aren't aware of anything that has taken place since your departure for your social event.
Do sleep, even though your cup runneth over with beauty.'
Bella could not think of a better thing to do than let her head hit her pillows and drift away to a place far, far away from here.