7
Notes: Hi! This is Chapter 6 of "Airplanes & Hospitals." I'm not sure how many more chapters this story will consist of, but be assured that there is definitely more coming. I welcome any and all criticism/writing tips/comments/reviews, so please let me know what you think!
Disclaimer: If NBC and the writers really came after all of us for writing stories about characters they created, I would tell them that they need to spend less time getting on our backs and more time thinking of ways to make sure Ray and Neela end up together at the end of series. So to the dearly acclaimed "powers that be": I don't own ER—are you happy now?
Neela spent the night in a maze of dreams that simultaneously haunted her and reassured her. She kept having visions of Jamail running through some sort of meadow—soccer ball at his feet—laughing and glancing behind him as if to look for Neela and see how close she was to catching up to him. Neela would awake to find her body covered in sweat, her sheets thrown to the floor, only to fall back asleep and have the same dream over again. Finally letting her frustrations get the better of her, she rose to get a glass of water from the kitchen.
As she tiptoed past the couch, Neela fought the urge to look down at Jamail's sleeping form; she couldn't look at him after their conversation, and yet at the same time felt the need to make sure he was still there, still in her life. She walked to the kitchen as fast as she could without making noise and grabbed a glass from the cupboard, only to hear Ray's door slowly open and his form appear in front of her in his boxers and socks. He was surprised to find Neela in the kitchen at this time of night—unlike him, Neela usually didn't get up for water. Tea, maybe. Water, no.
Neela suddenly couldn't stop her eyes from roaming over to where Jamail lay sprawled on the couch, the same position she had found him in not more than a few nights ago: his arms wrapped contentedly around his pillow, just like Ray. Ray promptly caught the mixture of love and sorrow that passed across Neela's eyes.
"Neela, are you okay?" Again, Ray couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong.
She looked up into his worried green eyes and all at once experienced an immense need to feel his arms around her. Impulsively reaching out and burying her face into his shoulder, she said, "I don't want him to leave, Ray…I'm going to miss him so much."
Ray had found out just how close Neela and Jay were, but he was taken aback at the profound pain in Neela's voice. It somehow didn't seem like the pain of seeing a brother leave for a few months, or at the most, years. He tried to reassure her that it wouldn't be long before she saw him again.
"You can always go visit him in Britain, Neela…you'll see him again soon." He tightened his hold around her and gently kissed the top of her head. "Who knows? Maybe I'll come with you…"
At the detection of a smile in Ray's voice, Neela couldn't help but tease him just a little. "Oh yeah? Who says?"
"I say. You can introduce me to your family…think how much fun that'll be." He knew it would take time for Neela's family to accept him, but the sooner he started getting to know them, the better. Where was this coming from? He suddenly felt amazed at his own eagerness; Ray had never willingly wanted to meet any of his girlfriends' parents…not that they'd asked.
"If Jamail likes you, Mum and Dad will like you. It's guaranteed." Neela unconsciously closed her eyes as she felt a throbbing pain form in her throat, willing it to stop there. She didn't know if her heart ached more for the fact that Ray had found a brother in Jamail or that Jamail had found a brother in Ray. I can see it in both of you and it kills me.
"Well I'm one step ahead, then, aren't I?" Ray felt reassured.
"Yeah, you are," Neela replied. She placed her head back onto Ray's bare chest and breathed in his familiar scent, warm and comforting at a time when she felt that everything in the world had turned upside down. Stroking Neela's hair as it lay gently on her shoulders, Ray felt the urge to say, "It's going to be okay." It was about the fifth time she had heard those words, but her mind somehow found it harder and harder for them to sink in.
O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O
Jamail awoke to the sound of cereal being poured into ceramic bowls, a sound that he had come to associate with Lucky Charms cereal over the course of the past week. A smile spread across his face as he watched Ray chow down his sugary treat. Hearing Jay fumble around on the couch, Ray called out, "Good morning, sunshine."
He sat up and—rubbing his eyes—replied, "Yeah, good morning to you, too. Since when do you get up before Neela?"
"Since she yelled at me for making her late all the time," Ray said with a sheepish grin.
Jamail laughed. "She can be pretty scary sometimes—I should know."
"Definitely." Man, am I going to miss him, Ray thought.
"So, are you coming to work with us?"
As exciting as another day watching Ray and Neela do cool procedures sounded to Jamail, he knew he had too much on his plate. "Umm, I think I'm gonna hang out at home today, if that's alright with you guys."
"Yeah, that's fine. I've got to go straight to the show from work to help set up, but I'll see you there. Neela's coming home to pick you up, though." Ray rose from his seat and proceeded to wash his dish rather than leave it in the sink like he had done so many times before.
"Awesome. I'll see you tonight, then." Jamail was excited already and it was barely light out. Just as his sister's door opened to reveal a ferociously groggy-looking Neela, Jamail hastily pulled the blankets back over his body and shut his eyes. The fewer chances he gave her to start crying, the better. Although puzzled at Jay's sudden reluctance to face his sister, Ray decided to let it drop. There were certainly things he had come to learn about the two of them, but Ray knew when not to push it. They're like little kids, he thought, grinning to himself. Jamail's breathing calmed less than three minutes later as he drifted into an uneasy sleep.
O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O
The sun was shining brightly into the apartment by the time Jamail awoke, his body faint but his mind stunningly alert. He had so much to do today—laundry, packing, writing letters…letters. Jamail knew this would take the most time to actually complete, and not wanting to run out of time before Neela came home from work to pick him up, he pried himself up off the couch and began to tidy up the small mess he had created since spending his nights in Neela and Ray's living room. Astonished and slightly terrified by the sudden weakness in his knees, Jamail took a moment to steady himself before taking a deep breath. I can do this. I'll be fine…but this is happening way too often…I could've sworn it wasn't this bad in Britain…
Two hours later, Jamail was sitting on the same couch he had lovingly called his bed, drumming his pen on the notepad in front of him. He had finished everything except the letters, knowingly putting it off as soon as he found some other menial task to occupy his mind. Jamail was even dressed for the show tonight—in crisp jeans and a T-shirt that revealed a likeness to Ray's style, he looked the consummate teenager. Now about these letters…there was so much to say to both Neela and Ray that he didn't even know where to start. I have to start somewhere, he thought, as he held the pen firmly in his grip and began to scrawl the words on the page in his distinctive handwriting.
Dearest Neela,
By the time you read this I will be flying somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean, looking down at the dark blue water and wondering how incredibly wonderful and frightening life is. (That sounds awfully cheesy, doesn't it? Well, nothing like the loom of death to bring out the tacky side in all of us! I'm joking, Neela—you know my sense of humor is morbid.) Anyway…there are things I need to say, so here it goes.
I am so grateful to have you, Neela. I never truly had the chance to tell you that (and I think it would probably be really awkward to say it out loud), but I just want you to know how much I love you. I never would have thought that you—my slightly insane but nevertheless lovely big sister—would end up in Chicago as an ER doctor. Watching you at work completely amazed me, and if things had been different, I feel certain that I would have followed in your footsteps. You'll just have to be enough of a doctor for the both of us, then, won't you?
This week has been so much more than I expected, and I've enjoyed every moment of it. After having been away for so long, it's nice to know that my sister hasn't changed a bit (actually, you have loosened up…I think that's Ray's doing). Speaking of Ray, don't do anything to chase him away—he's a nice guy. Oh and make sure he wears a tie the first time he meets Mum and Dad—that's very important. I know this is going to sound weird, but you two…you're going to be happy, Neela, I can feel it.
I will always be with you. Remember that, okay?
Always,
Jamail
Mind and body drained, Jamail put down the pen and closed his eyes in an effort to keep the strength from flowing out of his hands. One down, one more to go…
O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O
As expected, Neela's day came off to a horrible start. In between the traumas, GSWs, and multiple car collisions, Neela didn't know if she had enough strength left in her to fight all the emotions and glaring thoughts roaming around in her mind. She thought she had let it all out last night, wrapped in Ray's arms and seemingly pouring her fears and sorrows into his body, but Neela couldn't stop the occasional stray tear from falling clumsily onto her cheek only to be hastily wiped away. And every time she caught herself giving in to her emotions, Neela would remind herself: Not in front of Jamail…not in front of Jamail. Thankfully, no one seemed to notice the invisible cloud that hung around her all day; as the end of her shift approached Neela felt the urge to run out the door, which she promptly did as soon as the clock hit seven.
Thirty minutes later, Neela was out of the shower and changing into her dress when Jamail's voice carried into her room from the kitchen. "Neela, we're going to be late if you don't haul your…" He was stopped by the sudden opening of Neela's door, one hand attempting to put on her heels and the other holding onto the dresser to make sure she didn't fall over in the process of doing so. Jamail laughed at the sight of her.
"Sorry. Don't hurt yourself; we've got enough time for you to put on shoes." Neela shot him a death glare, a smile spreading across her face.
"Thanks," she said sarcastically.
"No problem," he responded equally mischievously.
They were out of the door in less than ten minutes, both Jamail and Neela pulling on heavy jackets in the face of the fierce Chicago weather. After putting his on, Jamail unconsciously felt for the two envelopes lining the inside of his coat pocket. He didn't want to leave them in the apartment and then have either of them find their letter before they were meant to. They would get them at the airport—not any sooner.
O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O
"So Jay, you're leaving tomorrow?" Sam, Morris, and Pratt were all huddled around Jamail, drinks in hand and waiting for Ray's band to start.
"Yeah I am, unfortunately," Jamail replied, not even bothering to hide the sadness in his voice.
"Well it was nice having you around; I think you got the better half of the genes," Morris said as he gestured toward Neela standing less than five feet away.
"Hey, I heard that!" She said, knowing deep down that Morris was absolutely right.
Before the conversation could be taken any further, Ray's smooth voice graced the audience as the lights dimmed to little more than a glimmer.
"How's everybody feeling tonight?" Ray glanced over the sea of faces, looking for the group of about ten that he knew were coming. But it was two people in particular he needed to see, and sure enough, there they were—two mocha-colored faces with eager eyes and bright smiles adorning their features.
"This first one goes out to a very special friend—his name's Jay and he's leaving for Britain tomorrow, so we're going to show him how we do things here in Chicago." The roar of the small crowd drowned out the ferocious clapping coming from the middle of the floor where Jay, Neela, Sam, Abby, Morris, Luka, and Pratt were standing.
The sound of Ray's electric guitar rang out louder than most of the ER staff was used to, but despite the feeling that they were on their way to losing most, if not all, of their hearing, the ER group couldn't help but be impressed at the music flowing out of the band. The song Ray had begun to play specifically for Jay was 'Stay Free' by The Clash, a band that the both of them had on their mental 'Favorites' list. Ray's band covered it nicely…actually, they sound better than The Clash! Jamail knew it was treason to even have such a thought, but he would allow himself this one indulgence.
Just as he was about to open his mouth to let out a big "Yeah!" Jamail's dizziness returned. Reaching out to whoever was standing next to him, Jamail attempted to steady himself before his knees gave out. Neela caught him just as he was about to touch the floor.
"Jamail!" Oh please God, let him be okay…
He had blacked out for the second time in two days. Neela's heart was pounding in her chest, her eyes glued to her brother's face as his young features seemed to stare back at her. Jamail…
"Someone call 9-1-1!" Her voice drowned out the whispers of the crowd now forming around them; Pratt and Luka were leaning over Jamail next to Neela, attempting to determine what had caused his sudden collapse while Abby franticly dialed the keys on her phone.
At the sound of Neela's voice, Ray immediately dropped his guitar and jumped off the stage to find his friends hovering over Jamail's seemingly lifeless form in Neela's arms.
"What happened?" was all that Ray could force out of his mouth. The scene was all too familiar.
Neela choked back a whimper as she said, "He's got a weak pulse…Abby called the ambulance—they should be here soon." Ray somehow felt she knew more than she was letting on. He hadn't pushed her before, but he needed to know now—it was imperative.
"Neela, you've got to tell us what's going on…"
The tears began streaming down Neela's face, her mouth unable to form the words that would betray his secret. He just needs some time…he'll open his eyes, I know he will…