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"This chicken is not correct. I thought I spoke to them about this." Sheldon said sourly, putting his takeout down on the coffee table in disgust.
"Well why do you order it then?" Leonard asked, equally sourly.
"I happen to like it, when it's done RIGHT." Sheldon responded.
"They never do it right." Howard muttered.
"How could you beat us like that?" Raj mourned, staring at his Halo score.
Sheldon twisted his head and smirked. "I'm smarter than you, of course."
"Yah, but Penny isn't, and she can kick even your ass!" Howard pointed out glumly.
Leonard perked up. "Yeah, hey, how come Penny didn't come by?"
"She's having a bubble bath tonight." Sheldon replied knowingly.
"How the hell do you know?" Leonard looked surprised, while Howard stared at his cup dazed and Raj muttered something about 'lucky bubbles'.
Sheldon smiled. "She told me, when I dropped off coffee and milk this afternoon on my way back from grocery shopping."
"You bought her coffee and milk?" Howard asked.
Sheldon's fingers twitched as he picked up a disinfectant wipe and cleaned his hands with it. "She's out. That's what neighbors do."
"I thought I heard her voice this morning." Leonard mused. "What was she wearing."
A gleam came into Sheldon's eyes, and deadpanned, "Nothing." Then gave a breathy laugh and whispered, "Bzinga!"
"Bastard!" Raj announced.
Sheldon smirked and looked at the clock. "It is precisely eight o'clock, I must prepare for bed, good night." He announced, standing up and heading for the bathroom.
"He is like a clock." Raj said, "Exatcly to the minute."
"Well, are we ready to go scope out some femme flesh?" Howard wiggled his shoulders and grinned.
"Yeah, Might as well." Leonard agreed, standing up. "To bad Penny isn't coming."
Sheldon listened to them leave as he brushed his teeth for exactly two minutes. Though he thought they were all fairly intelligent, and counted them as friends when he talked to his mother on the phone, their comings and goings were of little concern to him, he rarely allowed them to disrupt his schedule, unless they were playing a game and he was winning, or they were watching the Star Trek movies, in order, marathon style, and Penny had made hot chocolate and was sitting beside him on the couch.
He liked when she did that.
She smelled nice.
Vanilla oil his memory recalled.
Yes, he liked Penny.
She was an anomaly, a female, who seemed to like him, who was attractive, didn't mind fighting with him, made excellent spaghetti for him, sang him the kitty song when he was sick, and more importantly, was an adept challenger at Halo.
If Leonard didn't exist, he may have even asked her to move in with him. She was incredibly messy, but probably would be a good roommate, he mused, then Leonards room would smell like candles and perfume, and not stinky socks. But it wouldn't be Leonards room, it would be Penny's. If Leonard didn't exist.
He pondered that thought some more, and decided that jail life really wouldn't suit his temperament, even though he could probably commit the perfect murder, by creating a time machine, and ensuring Leonard was never born, but then there was that paradox problem again. And Leonard wasn't really that bad, for an experimental Physicist.
By the time he finished pondering why anyone would want to be an EXPERIMENTAL physicist, his night time abulations were done, and he had tucked himself into bed in his flannel Superman lounge pants. They were too hot, but he loved them, so he slept without a shirt when he wore them, to prevent his temperature from varying.
His room perfectly tidy, he assumed the plank position, and fell asleep at precisely 8:45 PM.