Icy's Delivery Service, Chapter Four

This Just In From Our Homemaker's Department

AN: My original plan for the next chapter was a rivalry between Livy and Icy (it's only logical). But while in the kitchen, inspiration struck. And what came out but this?

I am not as random as you think I codex.

Darcy had brought home another boy, and Darkar was pissed.

It wasn't what you'd think, believe it or not. It wasn't jealousy, or shit-you're-revealing-our-secret-hideout, or anything like that. It was just, you know, embarrassing. The lair was a pigsty. Clothes scattered the girls' rooms, the television was turned on with various video game controllers all around, and the cave floor hadn't been swept in ages. She should have known better.

Darkar did a quick pickup as the girl gave her new boy toy the grand tour. Which pretty much was, "dark room, dark room, throne room, dark room, room where we sleep, dark room, dark room, kitchen."

"What do you need a kitchen for?" said the random, eyeing Darcy's nonexistent waistline.

Darcy looked down at herself. It was four inches around her tummy, while her sisters were at a perfect two point five. "We use the kitchen," she said hotly, "for our magic. Spells and potions and all that jazz."

The boy may have been somewhat attractive- even Darkar, in his hetero glory, could see that. But he definitely either didn't know what was good for him, or was not the darkest feather on the phoenix. "Don't they, like, confiscate your powers once you get expelled?"

Darcy's eyes blazed, but she quickly put on a smile. "How about we whip something up in the kitchen just for you?"

The boy's eyes buggered out as Darcy tied him to Darkar's throne. "I'll show you not to mess with me," she smiled, a beautiful demon.

Icy walked into Shadowhaunt at this point, confused by Darkar standing around and looking smug, Darcy looking like a dominatrix (no pun intended), and a boy looking both happy that he was getting… erm, that sort of attention, and also, completely scared.

"Ice!" Darcy exclaimed, breaking out of her sex slavery dreams. "I need you to pick up a few things for me. Take a list down."

Icy pulled out a piece of paper and a pen.

"Eggs of a phoenix. Oil- the kind isn't especially specific. And a feather. Preferably from a large and predatory bird." Darcy ticked off each ingredient on her fingers. "I have everything else I'll need to do this one. Maybe enough for a double batch."

Icy knew exactly what Darcy was planning to make. "Does new guy have any idea…?" she asked vaguely, a little surprised by the expression on his face.

"I'm sure he can guess. It's not brain surgery."

Icy sighed, headed back out into the cold, and flew to Magix to compile the ingredients. Being as it WAS a magical dimension, and powers were not uncommon, even the strangest of things on the list were quickly located in the local Wal-Mart. As a treat, Icy also picked up a new novel for Darkar, a story he had expressed interest in called, "Falling In Love And Having Children With A Woman Who Hates Me." It seemed too sappy and romantic for his appearance, but there were a lot of things about Darkar's personality that did. He greatly enjoyed defying stereotypes, along with peppermint and romance novels.

Icy flew back to the lair with the eggs, the oil (very simple vegetable oil, in case you wondered), and a hawk feather. As Darcy exclaimed over the perfection, and her lover boy struggled to free himself from the ropes, Icy helper her friend get out the other ingredients and supplies.

They mixed the special powder with the egg and the oil, along with a bit of enchanted water. Darcy stirred 50 times clockwise. The 50 times counterclockwise. That was her secret to making the mix even better, even though the directions never mentioned it.

Leaving Icy to finish it up, she sauntered over to the boy. "You're in for quite a treat," she said seductively. "Just give us a little more time."

Forty-five minutes later, the brownies were out of the oven, and the three villains (Stormy was out on some retreat) were having fun decorating them with smiley-face icing and force-feeding them to Darcy's boyfriend. "This'll show you not to mess with me! We're gonna make you eat so many brownies that you'll get fat and kicked off the show!"

The kid's eyes bugged out of his head. "NOOOOOO!" he wailed.

But it sound like, "NRRRRMMMPPHHH!" because of the chocolaty goodness in his mouth.

Darcy tickled him with the feather, making it look incredibly inappropriate. "Isn't this fun?"