disclaimer ; i don't own a thing, except a giant poster of edward thats hanging on my wall :)

I'm thinking 'bout all the things I heard about today
All this week and tomorrow
And how these hands can create some better things for bettering
but you see for now I got my own things
I can't help it
I got too many issues I own
So I cannot help I'm afraid, yeah
But keep on preaching, preaching and heal the world
Lip service makes us look great

- The Rocket Summer, Do You Feel

CHAPTER 2.

The doorknob slowly turned, the entrance way to the party, and I was smart enough to side step out of the way to avoid getting trampled. When I saw the same girls from the night before, holding onto Mikes's side, I knew the first pill Ang and I popped wasn't going to be enough. I grabbed another from my pocket, and threw it in my open mouth. My head slowly became heavier, and the ringing in my ears intensified. Still, when she was placing kiss upon kiss onto his neck, I knew even that wouldn't suffice. I walked over to him, only to grab the alcohol out of the bag. I was glad to see that it wasn't opened yet, happy to know I wouldn't be sharing anything with the girl, sucking faces with my best friend, who was dressed even sluttier today, impossible as it seemed.

I recieved a few snarky comments about my outfit from the guys, but let them pass. Tonight was about having fun. I went into full hostess mode, greeting each of the hundreds of people who passed through my house. I sighed, not really understanding how it had gotten this out of control, before sliding out a chair from the island in the kitchen. I had Angie help me stand onto it, not trusting my own balance in these dreaded high heeled shoes, and Ang yelled, "LISTEN UP," to get everyones attention, not that she had to try that hard in the first place.

Every pair of eyes stared up at me, and I took a quick gulp before beginning. "Well, welcome everyone! Our party is going to be ridiculous, but first, there are a few rules. No one will be drinking my alcohol," I shot a quick glance to the girls standing with Mike and Tyler, "and everyone has to be out of here before one! Other than that, go nuts."

I hopped off the chair, and took a swig from the bottle of Whiskey, I walked over to the guys with Sam by my side. I shot a death glare at the girls from last night, Jessica and Lauren, I would soon learn, in return, earning a soft smile from both.

The blonde, Lauren, simply said, "You have a beautiful home," in a soft voice. It was obvious that the guys explained to them that we were their friends, and if they didn't get along with us, they couldn't stick around. I was surprised they still were around.

I shot her another evil look, and said, "Yes, one I don't remember inviting you into," and just ignored them as Ang, Mike, Tyler, Ben, and I discussed all the stupid things we were planning on doing tonight. We all went into my pool house, inviting anyone else who wanted to come along, to smoke a bowl of weed. Jessica and Lauren came, against my wishes, along with a few other people from the party. A girl named Kate, who I could learn to like, came out with her boyfriend Garrett. There were a few more rowdy guys that I didn't bother learning the names of.

We passed it around, Jessica and Lauren both turning it down as it passed them by, Mike was in a full on flirting mode. Still staring at me while he did it, but not as much as the previous night. After I left, they must have ended the night on good terms. Maybe she interested him more than I knew, or maybe he really was just trying to get back at me. I didn't know, and right now I didn't care. The high was taking me over, willing me to forget everything other than the fact that tonight was going to be a good night.

I took another few hits of the bowl before deciding to enroll myself in a game of flip cups. After that, I played beer pong against Tyler, and after that, we had a competition to see who could take the most shots. I was neck in neck with Mike, when the doorbell rang. I checked my watch, it was 11:30, past the time when more guests came to show up. Ang offered to get it, but curiousity got the best of me, and I took the last shot on the table, and walked away in forfeit. Mike cheered, and I rolled my eyes and laughed.

When I reached the door, I pulled it open in a daze. The room was spinning, the drugs and drinks taking its effect over me. When I opened the door to a pair of firmiliar green eyes, I had to shut my eyes before reopening them again, checking to see if Edward was really standing in my doorway, or if I was imagining it. When he stared back at me, still, tapping his left foot impatiently against my cement porch, I cocked my head with confusion.

"Is Edward Cullen really standing in my door, at my party right now?" I asked, in a teasing manner. The words came out more slurred than I expected. He just rolled his eyes in response.

"Only to ask if you could keep the noise to a minimum? I have my brothers and sisters over, and I'm finding it difficult to converse with them, competing over the noise of loud, intoxicated teenagers," he said, irritated, as he looked me up and down, "much like yourself."

"You have brothers and sisters? Now, why did I never know this?" My words came out messy now, and even I could barely make out what I said. Edward seemed to have no problem, though.

"You thought I was too much of a pain in the ass to ask," he replied, with a quick shrug of the shoulders.

I smiled at him, against my own intentions, before saying, "Bring them over, get drunk. I would love," I over extended the word, making the 'o' long and dramatic, "to see perfect pretty boy Edward Cullen drunk, beat me in a game of beer pong, I am the champion you know," I said proudly. Giving him a smile that bared all my teeth.

A small smile began to come to his lips, obviously against his best efforts, because he quickly went back into straight faced, serious Edward. Any trace of fun, and carefree disappearing behind his careful exterior, the seriousness that made him, him.

"Whatever," I said, louder than I thought, "I'll make them keep it down," I turned around, door still wide open, him standing behind me. "HEY! EVERYONE!" I shouted, again, getting every head in the room turning in my direction, "THE FUN POLICE ARE HERE! WE'RE BEING TOLD TO SHUT THE FUCK UP, GOT IT?" I slurred all the words, but everyone in the room understood, a low "boo" coming from each of them, but I knew they would comply. "Happy?" I said, facing Edward now.

He was chuckling, a low throaty noise, then he said, "Immensely, oh, and Bella?" He said, before turning to leave, I jerked my chin in his direction, urging him to finish, excited to go back to the party, "you look gorgeous in that dress," he said, and with that, he turned away. I blushed a dark shade of red, and I didn't know if this was because I was still wearing the embarrassing get-up I wore to throw off Renee, or because he had said it. I just closed the door, ignoring the thoughts.

I went back to my guests, taking another quick shot of vodka, before inviting people back into the pool house to smoke from the bong. It ended up only being me, Ang, Ben, Tyler, and Mike. Just the way I liked it.

"So," I began, holding the puff of weed I just took into my mouth, making the words come out only though my nose, sounding nasally. I let out the breath before continuing, "I thought you guys would have ditched barbie sluts last night."

Mike shrugged, "Lauren and Jess," he corrected me, I rolled my eyes. "And," he continued, "their actually kind of cool, once you get past the giggles and stupid remarks."

Ang snickered, underneath Ben's arm, I wasn't sure why they weren't dating each other yet. It was clear how they felt about the other, but I figured she didn't want to place him in the same catagory as Eric, since he was far from it. "Which means," she said, turning to me, "they didn't let them go any further than making out, and they weren't ready to give up just yet," Ben, Angie and I all laughed hysterically at this, and Tyler and Mike just sulked.

It wasn't until I popped in a third pill that things started getting iffy. The world stopped being real, and my hallucinations took over. My skin felt like it was crawling, and all the people in my house making me uncomfortable.

I started yelling, "Get the fuck away from me, get out of my house, go!" People quickly vanished. Leaving me and Angie, and Ben. Mike and Tyler left with Jessica and Lauren, and we were all laying on my couch, staring at absolutely nothing. Ang was just as messed up as I was, but she had Ben to rub her back and coo her

My stomach began to churn, and the house started to close in on me.

Just then, the door slowly opened, the sound almost deafening to my stoned ears. Renee took in a sharp gasp, while looking around the house. A hand flew up to cover her mouth.

"Quite the head ache," she said in a low, disappointed tone. A pang of guilt hit me, but I was too high to care. "What the hell went on in my house, Bella Marie Swan?" She demanded.

Ben and Ang took this as their cue to leave, they gave me a quick wave and stepped out of the house. Through the window, I could see them stepping into Ang's car. I knew this was a bad idea, but again, couldn't bring myself to care.

I walked up the stairs, heading into my bedroom, hoping I could get away that easily. "Get the hell back here," my mother shouted. I sighed, and walked back downstairs, slowly, watching each step as I did. They were moving, and something was crawling all over them. This terrified me to the verge of tears. My mother sat me down and yelled for what seemed like days. My head was already throbbing, and I couldn't take my eyes off her face, the same things crawling on the stairs were on it. Bigger this time, faster, more determined to crawl under her skin. The room was spinning, and her loudest screams came out in a whisper. I felt myself slipping away, and when she finally finished her rant, I walked up the stairs, making myself not look down, which caused me to trip a few times. I quickly stood up, not wanting these determined crawlers to get onto me, and ran into my bedroom, slamming the door behind me.

I pulled myself out of my dress, but for some reason, kept the heels on my feet. I slipped into a night gown, pink and silky, not really caring what was on my body, as long as it was clean, bug free, they were everywhere. This was the only piece of cloth in my room that wasn't. Suddenly, I looked out the window. Across the street, on Edwards's house, a million cats were sitting on his roof. They were meowing loudly, wanting to get off. I had to go save them. I climbed out my window, down the eavestroff like I had thousands of times before, running towards his house, desperate to save the cats.

Outside was no better than my house. The wind was speaking to me, whispering in my ears, saying nothing but everything at the same time. The bright street lights burned my eyes, and the ground started to sink when I walked across it. It was pulling me down, down into the earth, where no one could find me, I couldn't stay in one place for very long, because it would suck me into it, leaving me without a chance to escape.

When I got to Edward's house, I barfed in his flowers. My head swirling, my mouth tasting like acid, but I couldn't care about it for long. The cats were calling to me, begging for me to save them. I had to save them, no one else could. I ran around to his backyard, searching for a ladder, or an easy way to get to the top of his roof. When I couldn't find anything, I laid furniture upon furniture on top of each other. I started out with a table, placing it on a hard cement patio. next, I grabbed chairs, then, buckets that I flipped upside down. It was finally tall enough that I could reach the roof, the only hard part climbing up the mountain to reach my destination.

I ignored the new bugs that filled my homemade ladder, I couldn't let the cats stay up there for very long. I felt like they were calling my name, telling me they needed my help. I kept whispering, "I'm coming," over and over again.

I was on the top bucket, and I stretched on my tip-toes, putting my fingers against the side of the roof. The furniture swayed at this movement, but stayed in place still. I pulled myself with all my strength onto the top of the roof. "I'm coming," I whispered one more time, my words coming out exhausted, taking a deep breath and letting it out between each word. When I finally got to the top of the roof, the cats were standing there waiting.

When I tried to grab them, they disappeared, out of my arms. They were all still waiting, but I couldn't grab them. I got frusturated, and I stomped my foot. A light turned on underneath me, and I could hear someone open the window.

"Come here!" I yelled, exasperated. I started to cluck my tongue, tut tut tut tut tut, here kitty kitty kitty, I wasn't even sure if I was saying this out loud or in my head anymore, everything was fuzzy.

"Bella?" I heard beneath me, a tired musical voice. But I ignored it, I had to get the damn cats, they needed me, they were calling for me, I was their only chance.

"Bella, what the hell are you doing on my roof? I'm calling the police."

With that, I lost my balance. My foot slipped, and I could feel myself slowly falling off the roof. It was all in slow motion. Sliding slowly and slowly into the inevitable, waiting for the ground to hit me hard, and all I could think about were the cats. They were helpless, they needed me, and I fucked up. Just like I had with every other situation in my life. When the roof disappeared from under my feet, I saw Edward put his hands out of the now screenless window, trying to grab ahold of me, not reaching far enough. The last thing I heard before I hit the ground was, "NO!" It was loud and clear, unlike everything else had been. My head was still fuzzy, my world still turning, but I was aware of what was coming next.

Then, everything went black.

A/N,

this is the last chapter i have pre-written, so if i get at least 10 reviews tonight, i will write another chapter and post it for tomorrow.
if not, i need 5 for the next day.
less than that, next chapter comes up on sunday.
tell me where i should go from here? :)
thanks, guys!
jewels.