Thank you to those who marked this story as a favorite or added me as a favorite author! Special thanks to those of you who take your time to review! I love to know what you think. You can expect one chapter a week. I'm sorry if I skip a week; I do have a life. As of now, I do my own editing, so I'm sorry if there are any mistakes. As always, enjoy!!

~IndiaIdania

IndiaIdania

Carlisle et Esme

Morning Light

La Lumière du Matin

Chapter Two

Open Book

Charles had been given a month to prepare his farm before he left for the army. Two weeks had passed since he had gotten his official letter. I began to read stories in the newspapers of the bloody sieges on Belgium and France. The descriptions were horrid and disgusting. Pictures of bandaged men with an arm or leg severed gave me nightmares. I dreamed of Charles in battle. Sometimes my dreams were so vivid that I would wake up and muffle my screams with my pillow. That was when I realized that though I didn't have romantic feelings for Charles, I did love him in a way. I cared about his safety, and his dream of having a plantation that he could pass on to his son, and later to his grandson after he passed. The Monday before he was to leave I made my mind up; I would try my best to raise our son, and make his dream come true. I didn't know if I was pregnant yet, but I would see a doctor, and try my best to make sure we conceived a child.

The following day I made an appointment at the hospital to see Dr. Greyson. He was one of the only doctors that hadn't joined the military to offer their services to injured soldiers. As far as I knew Dr. Greyson and Dr. Cullen were the only available doctors in Columbus. Of course, Dr. Cullen covered the night shift because I never saw him during the day. I hadn't told Charles what I was up to of course because he was sure to tell me "No." It would have been very embarrassing for him to explain his sexual life to a doctor. During the day he acted like I was just his "cook and clean for him wife." He made no mention of what we did every night. I wasn't sure exactly why this bothered me, but I think it had to do with the nagging voice in my head that would whisper "he's just using you."

I drove the car very cautiously on my way to the hospital because it was raining so hard. The clouds were so dark that they resembled the burnt coals in out fireplace. The air was frigid and, the rain pounded on the windshield. It felt so ominous. I wasn't superstitious, but I couldn't help but think if the weather was foreshadowing my future. I hurried through the doors, and instead of continuing to the children's wing, I made my way to the front desk, my high heels clicking loudly, fighting to drown out the rolling thunder. Grace, the receptionist, looked up and did a double take. "Esme? Is something wrong?" Grace was new, she was younger than I, and she had started working soon after our old receptionist volunteered for the Red Cross. Everyone that had been working here had some kind of background in medicine, but with many of them joining the Red Cross and the males being drafted, there were so many spots to fill. I had been offered a job as well, but since I was planning to get pregnant I kept my volunteer status. Besides, filing papers wasn't my thing, and I didn't want to be a maid either, I liked to be with the children.

"Esme"?

I jerked out of my reverie and smiled at her. "Oh, nothing's wrong, Grace. I have an appointment with Dr. Greyson. Umm, you could call it a check-up."

"Oh, alright," she said looking for the paper with the schedule of appointments. "Oh, Esme, Dr. Greyson isn't here today, he was feeling under the weather. There's another doctor on call today." She leaned forward and smiled girlishly. Her eyes danced and she whispered across the desk. "I've never seen him before; he's the one that does the night shift. Esme, I can't wait until you see him! He's the most handsome man I've ever seen! He told me "Hello," this morning and introduced himself, and caught me off guard. I had been looking at my papers and when I look up I see the most beautiful face I've ever seen, but he was so serious… He was perfectly polite; however there was just something about him that gave me chills. When he walked away, I realized that my mouth was open… He must have thought I was an idiot or something." I knew exactly what she meant.

"Oh, I'm sure he didn't th-"

"You just have to see him! Oh, Esme, he's just a dream!" she gushed. I giggled. Knowing Grace, he had to have something wrong with him to scare her away. She was a professional at the art of flirting and exploited her skills often on unsuspecting men. Then, I assured her that I would tell her what I thought about him after my appointment. I knew that if I told her I'd already met him, she would probably claim to be upset that I had been holding out on her. I needed to get this appointment over with. I also didn't want to have a panic attack right in front of her. I was getting anxious as I followed her to one of the examination rooms.

"You can have a seat. The doctor will be right with you, Mrs. Evenson," she said with I stood frozen beside the door to take one last deep breath to calm my nerves. "Good grief, Esme, go in" she urged. "It's not like he's going to bite you," she smirked and turned to go back to the front desk, and closed the door as soon as I was inside. I gazed out at the lightening as the wind rocked the trees violently. I tried to concentrate on the pattern of the rain to keep my thoughts from the embarrassment of possibly be examined by a man that made my head spin and my heart race. The feeling was new, and it made me very, very nervous.

"Good afternoon, Mrs. Evenson." I whipped my head around, and there he was standing in the doorway… Where did he come from? I hadn't even heard him open the door.

"Hello, Dr. Cullen." My voice shook on the Hello.

"What do I have the pleasure of doing for you?" I blinked. His voice…

"Umm, well, I... I am…" I felt the heat rise in my face; odd. I didn't usually blush. How do I tell him this? I know he's a doctor, but he makes me feel so uncomfortable. He looked up from the chart he had been waiting to write my answer on. His eyes softened.

"Mrs. Evenson, it's alright if you're nervous. I'm here to help you." Oh, gosh. I am SUCH and idiot! He has to talk to me like a child… I inhaled deeply, and exhaled slowly.

"My husband and I are trying to conceive." There, I said it. He smiled softly and his eyes softened even more. They were a rich golden color… so beautiful.

"I understand. I'll examine you and take a blood test to see if you are with child." With child? That's a little old fashioned.

I don't know why, but I trusted him. I could feel that he genuinely wanted to help me. He stepped out of the room for me to put on the paper gown. It was so awkward taking off all of my clothes knowing that he was on the other side of the door; he could accidentally walk in on me. I acknowledged it as a silly thought considering that he was about to perform a pelvic exam on me. Once I was dressed I waited for him on the examination table. As soon as I was settled he knocked, and asked if I was ready for him. How did he know exactly when I was done? I wonder if he could hear me moving around on the paper cover. Of course not, the doors were thicker than that... He was probably just a good guesser.

"Well, Mrs. Evenson. I'm going to give you a quick pelvic exam so that I can check your cervix, and then I'll take the blood test. I just nodded and laid back, making sure I didn't make eye contact with him and prayed that I could keep my breathing even. He placed his hand gently on the inside of my thigh, and I jerked my hips back. His hands were freezing! He mumbled an apology and explained that he had forgotten to make sure his hands were warmer. I just nodded and kept my eyes on the ceiling. He was done before I could count to ten. That was quick.

"Hmm," he wondered aloud. "It seems as if your cervix is a little swollen. I'll take that blood test now, Mrs. Evenson." I sat up slowly; my head was spinning a bit. I could handle needles, but his voice… He rolled his stool and lifted the back of the table so that it turned into a sort of reclining chair… Maybe this was an old hospital bed that they refurbished. My arms had been folded across my belly, and he gently took my right arm with his and pushed my elbow upwards with his left hand so that my arm was flexed straight out. He looked up, probably to make sure I wouldn't freak out. I was already showing out to be unbalanced. Instead of tying a string above my elbow crease, he simply wrapped the thumb and middle finger of his left hand around my arm. "Are you feeling alright? This isn't painful is it?"

"No, it's fine" I answered softly. He cleaned the area with alcohol, and it gave my skin the same cooling feeling that his fingers did. Then, he drew out a syringe, and so gently that I barely felt it, he inserted the syringe into my vein, and filled the syringe with my crimson blood. Still holding my arm in his left hand he applied pressure and gauze. Then after about six seconds he wrapped the area in fresh gauze.

"I'll get a nurse to run the test. It shouldn't take very long." He exited the room, but was back in less than a minute. "So, you seem to be a very healthy young woman, Mrs. Evenson. How long have you and your husband been trying to conceive?" He had my chart out again.

"Well, Dr. Cullen less than a month, but…" I hesitated. What was I supposed to say, that we were trying to make sure that my husband had his dying wish fulfilled? He looked at me curiously, and then his face fell.

"Pardon my curiosity, but your husband has been drafted hasn't he?"

"Yes, sir."

"I know that you haven't had any other children, have you?"

"No, sir."

"You are trying to conceive an heir." It was meant to be a question, but it came out as a statement. How did he figure that out? Maybe it was obvious that I was desperate to find a way to make sure I was pregnant. He looked at me with that soft expression in his eyes again. "You are being very selfless, Mrs. Evenson." Oh, no… did he know that that was the only reason we were trying to have a baby? He was reading me like a book… "Mrs. Evenson, I am leaving the city tomorrow, so I won't know how everything will turn out for you. I've taken another job…" he paused and seemed to have an internal fight with himself. "I'll be working at a hospital in Ashland, Wisconsin."

"Oh," I breathed. Why does that make me so sad? I felt almost depressed by his announcement.

"If the test turns out negative, then you should start taking pills of Red Raspberry Leaf. They will increase your cervical fluid to help your husband's sperm swim easier." Oh, well that was straightforward. I looked away nervously. Had he really just said that? Oh, right, he's a doctor. He's supposed to say that. "I would have liked to be here to help you with your pregnancy, and if you aren't pregnant yet, make sure that you are able to conceive, but I've already taken the job." He seemed stressed. Wait, is there something wrong? He must have read that last thought, and quickly assured me that I was very healthy. Then he excused himself to go and see if the test was done. I got dressed, and got back on the bed-chair thing. I reclined against the back of the chair and prayed that I was pregnant. I needed to be pregnant. I had barely any time left with Charles, and I wanted to be able to tell him that I was pregnant before he left so that he would be able to leave in peace knowing that his farm would be passed to his son. I had already failed my parents. I didn't want to fail him, besides, I had always wanted children.

I heard a soft knock on the door, and then Dr. Cullen stepped in. His face was grave. Oh, no…

I thought of cutting it off here.

He walked up to my side and laid the chart down by my side. He cleared his throat and took my hand. "Mrs. Evenson, it seems that you are expecting," his lips curved into a smile that reached his eyes. I'm not sure what came over me, but I threw myself into his arms. He caught me and stiffened, but then relaxed and gently squeezed me back. He smelt heavenly, but his chest was as hard as stone. He was so cold, and instantly I felt alive.

~*IndiaIdania*~

He released me, and gently pulled my arms away from his neck. Then he took my hands in his. As soon as I wasn't inhaling his intoxicating scent, I let realization hit and engulf me. I'm pregnant… "Congratulations, Mrs. Evenson. Would you like me to give you a few nutrition and exercise pointers to help you maintain a healthy pregnancy?" I'm going to have a baby… A smile slowly spread across my face. My eyes were unfocused as I let the fact wash over my brain and drown me in motherly joy. I was already in love with my unborn child. I'm pregnant. "Mrs. Evenson?" I looked up into his face, sometime while I was swimming in the delight of my newly discovered pregnancy, he had let go of my hands and was looking over my chart again.

"Yes?" I hadn't really heard what he asked me.

"Never mind. I'll make sure you receive a nutrition pamphlet," he said, a smile playing at the corner of his lips, but I don't think he wanted me to think that he was laughing at me.

"Alright," I sighed. My mind was nine months away, which reminded me… "Do you know when my due date is, Dr. Cullen?"

"Hmm," he smiled, "I was wondering when you'd ask that. Your due date should be around or on September 16th." September 16th… Was it possible for your heart to melt because of a date? I just smiled back at him.

"Good," I said in a barely audible voice. I tried to keep myself composed, but I wanted to laugh and cry and sing and dance, and goodness knows what would happen if I threw myself at him again… He stood up, and helped me down from the table-bed. Placing his hand against the small of my back he led me to the door while explaining that I would need to schedule monthly check-ups to make sure that the baby and I stayed healthy. Right before we parted at the door, he looked down at me and whispered in a low voice.

"You can relax now, Mrs. Evenson. You are wound too tightly for you or your baby's health." What? Then realization hit me like with a baseball bat. I am pregnant. Charles and I don't have to try anymore. I accidentally let out a very childish girly squeak. My cheeks reddened and I apologized. How embarrassing… Oh, no! He knows??! Oh, please don't know. I pleaded with his subconscious to stop reading me. "Au revoir, Madame, et bonne courage." He whispered and kissed my hand. He knows I'm French too??? Well, of course, he does. My name is obviously French… I need to get over myself. I'm being paranoid. Haha, I am wound too tightly.

"Goodbye, Dr. Cullen. Good luck in Ashland, and thank you!" I called after him, as he strode down the hallway to visit his next patient. I walked to the counter of the front door, to tell Grace that I was going home, and I wouldn't be back until tomorrow. I must have startled her because when she looked up her eyes widened and her mouth hung open a little.

"Esme?"

"What's the matter Grace?" I asked, puzzled by her state of shock. She opened the little half door and dragged me into the filing closet.

"What happened in that room, Esme? Be honest!"

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, please Esme. I've never seen you like this. You're sort of glowing. Actually, you're absolutely radiant!" she had one eyebrow raised. I frowned. Did she honestly think that I would ever cheat on my husband? There was the incident of flinging myself into his arms… I pushed the thought from my head. Well, she isn't going to let me out of this very easily… I took a deep breath and said,

"I'm pregnant!!!!" Her expression changed instantaneously.

"Oh, my gosh, Esme!!" she screamed. I couldn't help, but squeal a bit myself. I had never been so happy in my entire life. "Congratulations, sweetheart! Ohmygosh! Can I throw your baby shower?" What? I was hardly a month pregnant.

"It's too soon, but, of course you can."

"Thank you, Esme!" then she sobered. "I didn't think you could have children." Oh… I knew the gossip went something like that. Most married women my age already had at least two children.

"Well, I'm happy to prove you wrong," I covered. I didn't want to get into any personal details. I wonder if it was a good idea to tell Grace. Charles will probably know before I even get home. "Well, I have to go home, and tell Charles," I used it as an excuse and fled the scene.

Once I was outside I took a deep breath of the icy air. Everything will be fine, in fact, better than fine. I climbed into the car and drove home; the ice storm had evolved into a beautiful snowfall. With a grin I contemplated the different ways to break the news to Charles. He would be leaving in less than a week. He needed to know. He would be so pleased. It would give him the closure he needed before he went off to war. I decided just to announce it to him at dinner.

I made a roast beef for dinner, Charles' favorite. Around dinnertime, I heard him stamping his boots outside the door to rid them of snow and ice. When he came in, he sniffed the air, and smiled appreciably. I smiled to myself. He seems to be in a good mood already. He removed his coat, boots, and gloves, and sat down at the table. I filled his plate for him and placed it in front of him. Then I did the same for myself and sat down in my usual spot across the table from him. After he said grace, instead of starting up the same conversation we always had, I decided to tell him, straightforwardly. "Charles," I waited. He looked up with hesitation, "Anne?"

"I'm going to have a baby."

"I know, Anne, that's why we're trying." What?... Oh, he doesn't understand.

"No, Charles, I had a doctor's appointment today-" he cut me off.

"What's wrong? Are you sick?" Would you please let me finish.

"No, I took a pregnancy test. I'm pregnant." I said slowly, letting it sink in. He stared at me with his fork halfway to his mouth. I smiled. I love people's reactions. Then he noticed the bandage around my right arm.

"Anne…" his face turned a slight shade of red. He can't be angry, can he? Then a tear started to roll down his cheek. He caught it and embarrassed, he cleared his throat, and stood up and started pacing. Oh, he's unwinding too. I thought. I blushed wondering what Charles would think of me if he had seem me throw myself at Dr. Cullen today. I was pregnant. His preparations for the future of his farm were intact. His vision was set. He would have his dream. He walked to me and kissed my hand swiftly. "Thank you," he choked. Then he went and sat down to finish his supper.

After cleaning the kitchen and washing some of our clothes I climbed into bed. Charles had gone to bed almost immediately after supper. I stared at my ceiling and gently ran my hands over my flat stomach. I smiled, suddenly very weary… For once in my life, I felt perfect and beautiful. I rolled over and noticed a nutrition pamphlet sticking out of my discarded purse on the floor. How did that get there? I didn't worry about it for too long because I was fast asleep right after the thought, Dr. Cullen.

Well, I hope you liked it! I understand that most Carlisle/Esme stories involve Esme being beaten by her husband. I hate abuse, but I'm not saying this story will be totally bruise free. Also, what, did you think Esme would really have an affair with Carlisle. Please remember Esme's personality, and besides, I absolutely LOATHE cheaters. So what would you like better? Drag out her pregnancy, or get to the Carlisle/vampire part?

P.S. It is so exciting when your first story is reviewed are favorited! You guys give me inspiration, and a slight buzz!