Thank God I Quit Smoking

Chapter 2

After the funeral I went back to my mom's house. It was where I was staying during my trip here. I couldn't afford to rent a hotel room for the whole duration of the trip. I'd figured I be here for about a week.

The first thing I did was change out of my dress clothes into something more comfortable and more colorful. All the black I was wearing was really starting to depress me. I chose blue jeans and a red shirt just a few shades brighter than my hair.

I was exhausted, and it wasn't even 5:00. I collapsed with a sigh onto my bed.

My mom had kept my room exactly the way I left it when I first went off for college. I was thankful she hadn't turned it into a guest bedroom. Staying in it almost felt like home. But this was no longer my home. My real home was back in LA with my friends.

I took a quick nap, all the crying had worn me out. My mother woke me up an hour and a half later for supper.

The dinner table felt so empty with just the two of us present. I missed Dad. My mother and I still hadn't gotten used to his absence even though he passed away more than five years ago when I was sixteen. He was killed in a car accident. We weren't tin the car with him, or we would've been goners too. A semi hit him head on. The car was totaled. No one could've survived it. He died instantly.

I don't have a step-dad and I'm glad. I don't' know who Mom would've married anyway. I suppose she could've found someone who was nice enough to take car of her and help pay the bills. In the long run I think it might've been beneficial if she had, but she didn't believe in divorce or remarriage for that matter. She always told me she had felt too strong a loyalty to Dad to even think about seeing someone else.

Dinner had always been quiet after Dad died, but now it was just awkward. I hadn't been home for so long that I had lost my immunity to the quiet. Not that I never ate in silence in L.A., I just wasn't used to doing it when there was someone else around. Most of my friends are big talkers, and if I go out to lunch with them I barely even get a chance to say anything.

I wanted to say something to get her talking, but I had no idea what I should say. I hoped she would say something. She looked like she had something to get off her chest. I waited for her to build up the courage to say it, but she never did. It must not have been too important.

When we were finished, I took away her plate having every intention of doing the dishes like I used to, but she stopped me. "You don't live here anymore. You're a guest. I'm going to treat you like one."

I didn't know what to do after dinner, so I went walking around town. There's not much to do here. We have a mall, but it's incredibly small compared to the ones in L.A. We have a movie theatre and even a mini-golf course, but other than that there's nothing really exciting. I walked through the streets past all the little shops and grocery stores with no destination in sight all the while smoking the last cigarette in the only pack I had on me. I smoked it down to a stub and threw it on the ground. It was sprinkling, and I knew the rain would put out the flame for me.

The rain felt so nice. Despite it being the evening, it was rather humid making it too hot for one's comfort. The rain acted as the perfect natural air conditioning with every falling drop that landed and burst on my skin providing relief.

I went into the first convenience store I found with an almost empty wallet and every intent on spending the last few dollars I had in there on another pack of cigarettes. Then I thought of my Nana and how smoking killed her, and how every time I would smoke in front of my mom from this day forward she would berate me for continuing such a vulgar act. Instead, I grabbed a pack of nicotine gum and a box of nicotine patches.

I brought my things to the cash register and was immediately at the front of the line. There was no one else in the store. There wasn't even anyone outside pumping gas.

The girl working the register looked familiar, but I couldn't place her. She had short spiky black hair and appeared to be around my age. It wasn't until she spoke that I recognized who she was.

"Will that be all?"

She still had her accent. After living in America all these years, it's not as extreme as it was when she first moved here. We could hardly understand a word she said at first.

When Yulia Volkova moved here from Russia my sophomore year, it was the most exciting thing that happened during my whole high school career. She was so odd and unique. We were amazed that she had moved to our little town.

"Yulia?"

She looked at me for a moment. "Do I know you?"

"We went to high school together. I'm Lena. Katina."

"I'm sorry, I don't remember you, but it's nice to see you, Lena."

It was no surprise that she didn't remember me. We were never exactly friends. We didn't belong to the same circle. She was more popular than I was. She wasn't in the 'in-crowd', but a step below. I was smart and often considered a goody-two-shoes, but I wasn't defined as a nerd, maybe a step above.

"So you're trying to quit smoking?" she asked observing the items I was purchasing.

"Yeah. I've been wanting to for a while, and I've decided to actually try."

"Hopefully this stuff works better for you than it did for me. I tried it, but ended up having to quite cold turkey."

Now that she mentioned it, I did remember seeing her smoking in the court yard at school a few times.

She rung up my items, and I barely had enough money with me to cover it all.

"It was nice seeing you, Lena."

"You too, Yulia." I almost turned to leave, but I decided to say one more thing to her. "We should get together sometime. To talk."

"Yeah, we should."

"But I'm only going to be in town for a few more days, so -"

"I have the day off tomorrow. We could have lunch together."

"Sounds good to me."

A man stepped up to the counter next to me. I'd failed to notice him come in at all.

"Well, I better go. You seem busy."

"Bye, Lena," Yulia called out from behind the counter then turned her attention back to the man.

The door chime jingled as I exited the convenience store. The rain had stopped, but the sun had gone down and had taken the heat with it. I wasn't at all uncomfortable as I made my way back to my mother's house.