Where Affection Lies

By. MidnightSting

Chapter 2: His Lies

He awoke to the sound of his meister's voice in a panicked state. She shook his shoulders violently, and hovered over his vertical form with weary eyes.

"Are you alright?" she asked in a poorly masked, shaky voice. He had done it again he thought miserably.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he mumbled feeling guilty for having woken her. He glanced over as he sat up to stare at her tired face. She hadn't been getting enough sleep lately. A frown set on his face as he realized the cause.

Him.

It had happened nearly every other night since their battle with the kishin. He would have a dream that started off well enough with them out on a mission, kicking ass, and taking names; then with almost no warning it would morph into a horrific nightmare of his meister screaming in pain as that damned Asura tore at her side.

He shivered at the memory of her yell, which burned into his brain, and replayed itself every few nights in his dreams. It was his subconscious's way of ragging on him he assumed.

'Here's what you get for letting her suffer like that!' he imagined the demon within himself cursing, 'it's your duty to protect her isn't it? Suffer!'

He was all right with that though. He disserved to suffer for the rest of his nights for ever allowing such harm to come to her. There was no way for him to forgive himself for that, he just wished his body would cooperate with his mind, and stop recruiting Maka for help every night.

"You know, Soul," Maka began slowly as she preoccupied herself with a blood stain on his sheets from one of the massive nose bleeds Blaire had been so kind to give him the other day, "you should tell me about this dream you keep having."

"It's nothing," Soul mumbled as he cursed himself for worrying her. He felt so useless all the time, and it was defiantly not cool. He couldn't even help her with the simplest of things like cooking, or cleaning because his work never quite met her high standards, but the least he could do was keep her complacent, and happy. He wasn't even doing that right.

"Yeah," she began with a glare his way, "it's so nothing. That's why you've been having it nearly every night for months now!" the stern look she gave him told him she meant business, and that she had, had enough of just sitting by and providing side-comfort when needed.

"I'm telling you, Maka," his mind briefly flashed back to the dream of her screaming in agony, and he turned away from her to look out his window with a deep-set, look of agony, "it's nothing..." he hoped to Shikigami that his voice didn't waver right then, or he would be done for.

"I've had it!" Maka yelped as she stood up, and slammed her hands down on his bed, "am I that unreliable to you?" she screeched, and she fisted the sheets within her small hands.

"Of course not!" Soul retorted without any thought as to what he was saying. Unreliable was one thing Maka was not. It wasn't that he didn't trust her; in fact it was the opposite. He trusted her to blame herself for his sufferings like she always did, and there was no way in hell he would let that happen. He'd rather die!

"Then why won't you tell me?" her voice cracked then, and Soul's heart sank in a guilty fit of rage. In his attempts to protect her from herself he was actually hurting her. He bit his lip in agony. How could he make her see?

"It's..." he paused as he desperately tried to find some way to tell her why, without actually telling her, "it's not like that," he finished as he mentally kicked himself for creating such a stupid answer. Not cool, Soul.

"But it is isn't it?" she sniffed as she stared down at her hands, and the one drop of water that left her cheek told him that she was crying now. The lump in his throat grew, and he wished to scream out in pain at the chain reaction he was causing in her. He never wanted this. He only wanted himself to suffer, never her.

It was then that he knew what he had to do. It hit him like a rock, and he wondered why he hadn't done so earlier. It was going to hurt him inside, but it would be better for her in the end, and anything that was good for Maka was good for him too; he would have to deal with the consequences later.

"You're such an idiot, bookworm, Maka," Soul began with a forced smirk. He felt Maka twitch in irritation, and he knew it was working.

"What!" she asked irritated, refusing to look up do to the tears that no doubt still stained her face. By her tone he determined that it was working. All he had to do was get her angry then she'd be too pissed with him to care.

"It's not really any of your business now is it," he was fairly confident in that last comment. There was no way he was coming out of this unscathed though. He braced himself for some sort of reading devise to make contact with his skull, and every second that passed with no pain was a second that fear built within him.

He looked over meekly to see what was taking her so long to see that she had in fact not moved at all. Her bangs covered her mossy eyes and her lips were set in a displeased frown. Panic struck him. Had his plan backfired, or had she found him out?

"Two can play at that game," she began bitterly as she looked up with pure hatred in her eyes, "Soul Eater Evans."

Shit.

She had not only not hit him with anything, but she had also used his full name. All of his full name, an anagram for 'I am very pissed at you right now'. He was in such a state of shock that he didn't have a chance to ask her what she meant, and by the time he came to she was already in her room with her door no doubt locked tightly.

"Nya~" Blaire began as she stretched and walked over to Souls bed to stare at his shocked face, "Soul-kun's in trouble~" He slapped a hand over his face as he realized that the slutty feline was actually right for once. Nothing in his plan had turned out right. He had made her angry, but not in the way he expected.

"I'm sorry, Maka," he sobbed into his hand as the sounds of her screaming in pain mixed with her angry words in his mind, "I'm so sorry..."