JD lay on his bed next to Stephanie. They both lay silent, staring up at the black ceiling of his bedroom. Similar thoughts were going down different paths as the seconds ticked slowly by. JD was surprised he felt so calm regarding what was about to happen. He felt strangely...at peace. Perhaps he was meant to do this. He was meant to do this together with Stephanie. They were meant to be together at the end.
Stephanie stirred on the mattress next to him. He looked over at her. She smiled at him, but he could see that the smile didn't reach her eyes. Gazing into her eyes, he saw an emptiness and, while he understood the emptiness, having felt it deeply himself, he was still scared to see it. She was a wonderful person; young and so full of life, but he knew better than anybody that that was just a façade she put on to fool the world. She had really been dying a little bit every day for years.
In order to avoid the emptiness in her eyes, he let his wander over the rest of her figure. She was very attractive, but hidden behind dark clothing and crazy hair colors, many people didn't spend the time looking close enough to see that beauty. She looked so...perfect...just lying there in her olive green cargo pants and black tank top. Her black-streaked, blonde hair was loose, splayed out on the bedspread, uninhibited by any form of hair gadget. She had a small silver stud in her nose and as she moved slightly to get more comfortable, he could see the sun's rays catching the metal piercing and reflecting tiny beams across the room.
JD had met her when he had moved in with his uncle, after his parents had died. He had discovered himself immediately attracted to her, so they had tried dating for a while, but they soon found out that they fit together better as friends, and so they had remained. He had watched her hook up and break up with many guys from school, all the while remaining a steadfast friend. JD had done some dating while in school as well, but he found himself measuring many of the girls he hooked up with against her and almost always discovered that they never measured up. JD had long thought about trying to get with Stephanie again, thinking his feelings had possibly changed over the months and maybe hers had too, but one day, just a couple of weeks ago, out of the blue, she had confided in him something he never could have foreseen.
She had been spiraling downward into a black hole of depression and even though JD did his best to try and curb her worsening state of mind, he realized then that things had gotten much worse than he would have thought. She made him swear that he wouldn't repeat what she was about to tell him. When she told him, he had been surprised, but it didn't come as much of a shock to him as it should have. Maybe it was because he understood her and he understood where she was coming from. What should have scared him the most was that he accepted her decision. When she had left, he had thought long and hard about what she was planning. He wondered how her life had gotten so out of control that she had to resort to her present plan of action. It didn't take long for his thoughts to turn on his own life's reflection.
It seemed like only yesterday that his memories had been filled with such light and life. He had been happy once, many years ago. He remembered the happy days that he had spent on Harper's Island with his parents, his brother Henry, and Abby. He hadn't ever been really good friends with Abby, not like his brother, but some part of him felt that of all people, she was the one most likely to have a shot at truly understanding him. He had felt a twinge of regret at his childhood memories. Ever since his parents had died and his life had done a complete one-eighty, he had broken off contact with most of his friends from before the accident, including Abby. But, as his perverse luck would have it, he found a friend, or a kindred spirit even, in Stephanie. She was very much like him, which had him craving the understanding that she could provide even though they were too much alike in a very bad way. Any therapist would immediately see warning lights concerning these two friends, as theirs was an unhealthy friendship, but he had never seen it that way. She was his best friend. She had been there through it all, listening to him talk about his parents, helping him through the adjustment to his new life, watching with him as his so-called friends melted away. His life was almost as hopeless as hers had become. He realized then that his one ray of light in life was now Stephanie and if she was going to fade away, well, maybe his life wouldn't be worth living after all.
He had asked her if he could be a part of her plan. He remembered that day well. She had looked so astonished at his request and she had even seemed on the verge of talking him out of it, but she must have seen the determination on his face, the resolution in his eyes, as her unuttered words remained hidden within herself. She had agreed, as long as they made a pact to do it together and to keep it a secret from the world, until it was done. He had readily agreed and so they had started planning. They had jokingly thought of the most extravagant eye-opening ways to accomplish their feat, something that would astound the whole world, but as the chosen day drew closer and closer, they both realized that maybe extravagant and outrageous wasn't for them. They discovered that something quieter and intimate was more to their liking. They had spent months together, living in the shadows of school and home and work life, keeping to themselves. Being center of attention was never their goal. The plan had finally been cemented and they were now laying on his bed, waiting for one last thing.
There was a knock at the door and before JD could answer, his uncle popped his head in the room. "How's it going?" Marty's query was met with silence. JD didn't know what to say, so he shrugged his shoulders in a non-committal way. He was kind of afraid that if he opened his mouth, he might say something that would give their plan away and then Marty would never leave. Marty sighed before continuing, "Well, I've got to run by the office for a few minutes and then maybe I can pick up a pizza on the way back. You interested in pizza for dinner?" He looked at JD and then over at Stephanie.
"Sure," JD finally replied. "Pizza sounds great." He managed to flash a weak smile at Marty, but it must have had a negative effect, as Marty's expression turned to one of concern.
"Is everything alright?" he asked.
Stephanie didn't miss a beat. "Oh, yeah! Everything's fine. We were just discussing some really deep food for thought. Matters of the universe and stuff." She shot a look at JD, making sure her expression was hidden from Marty by her free flowing hair.
"Matters of the universe, eh?" Marty looked amused.
"Yeah," Stephanie replied. Her eyes drifted up towards the ceiling as she spun her tale. "The purpose of life, our place in the universe. It was actually a topic that somehow came up in our Lit class. I really can't remember how we even got on that topic," she flashed a bright smile at Marty.
JD watched in amazement. Whatever alluring arts Stephanie possessed as a woman, she definitely knew how to make the male sex feel at ease when she wanted to. Marty made some noise of approval before disappearing from the room. Five minutes later, they could hear his car speeding away down the street.
Stephanie sat on the edge of the bed and pulled a small plastic bottle out of one of her many pants' pockets. Turning to JD, she calmly said, "It's time."