Chapter 14

Eugene sleeps like the dead, and only wakes up when a throat is purposefully cleared above him. He opens his eyes to see a figure looking down at him, upside-down from his perspective.

The king arches an eyebrow at him.

Eugene blinks twice. "I'm on the floor, aren't I?"

The king nods. Eugene flexes his arms and wrinkles his forehead enough to get back his bearings while not breaking eye contact.

"And there's a frog on my face."

The king nods.

"And Blondie's using me as a pillow."

The king arches an eyebrow.

"Is she drooling?"

The king's eyes narrow as he inspects Rapunzel's face. "Yes," he says.

"Fantastic."

"Do you care to explain this, Mr. Fitzherbert?"

"I-" Eugene thinks about this for a second before deciding that "the frog was faking it" most likely won't go over well. "No."

"You sure about that?"

"Umm…" The king gives him a look that says that he probably should give an explanation a try. "Uh, the frog was faking it?"

The king only looks confused for a moment before he shakes his head, deciding it's not worth it. "I came by to inform you that the Captain of the Guards has submitted his resignation effective as of noon today. After that point he will be a normal citizen."

It takes a moment for Eugene to process this. "… So after noon I can punch him and not get executed?"

The king shrugs. "If you'd like. I would hope you have better ways to spend your afternoon."

"No, my schedule's free."

"We'll have to change that. You know, I think we should go through all the laws and iron out all these double standards. You were scheduled for execution, but got off because you saved my daughter. How many other men in the dungeon would do something so noble if given the chance? Then if you attack the Captain of the Guards you'll be thrown in prison, but if you attack a normal man you won't. Either way it's still assault. And then Walter gets fired for kissing my daughter while you…" He gives the girl passed out against Eugene's chest a pointed look.

"I'd never do anything she didn't want."

"Am I supposed to be impressed with that? That should be the norm for civilized behavior, rather than an uncommon occurrence."

"But that prick guard-"

"-has been fired."

Eugene snaps his mouth shut as the king begins to mumble absently to himself, "I think I'll start with the assault laws, can't have people attacking one another no matter how little clout they have. Won't be able to get around to it until at least Tuesday. I have to find a new Captain of the Guard after all."

"You could always go for Maixmus," Eugene suggests.

"The horse?"

"Yeah. He's the best law enforcement you've got."

"Mr. Fitzherbert" the king sighs, "…Eugene… I like you. I know that the two of you come as a set, and I've started thinking of you like the son I just recently found. So you really need to quit acting like an idiot, so I don't have to do anything to you that I don't want to do."

"Sorry."

"Hmm. Anyway, I just came to tell you that. And to tell you that it is eleven forty-five and my daughter has missed all her morning lessons."

"Oops."

"Just make sure she's on time to her afternoon lessons. I think they're learning about scansion today, and you know how frightfully important that is."

Eugene can't tell if he's being sarcastic or not, and he sits for a minute in thought as the king leaves, shutting the door behind him. Staring up at the ceiling, he starts feeling the warm fuzzies creeping into his chest.

The king thinks of him as a son.

He grins like an idiot as he dislodges Pascal from his face and looks down at Rapunzel. Thankfully she doesn't look overly sexy, with her face slack, her mouth hanging open, and both arms thrown at odd angles. He's also glad that she's wearing one of her more modest nightgowns and that both his hands are placed in reasonable spots on her back. It really doesn't look as though they got up to much, which is good considering the unexpected company, but also disappointing because he's heard that make-up sex is fantastic. He wouldn't know as he's never made amends with a girl before.

"Hey, Sunshine," he whispers, shaking her awake. "Time for lunch."

"Lunch?" she mumbles.

"Yeah. It's that meal you eat between breakfast and dinner."

"Mmm." She snuggles closer against his chest, rubbing her soft cheek against his skin before turning to leave little, drowsy kisses against his solar plexus. His eyes close as she trails down across his abs, his breath more forced and his body stiffening with each passing press of her lips. She nuzzles against him, resting her head in the more fleshy skin of his stomach, and he groans as he realizes that she was simply searching for a more comfortable spot.

She looks up at him, her clearing eyes alight with curiosity and discovery that she can so easily elicit such a noise. It's a look that will launch a thousand ships and destroy him completely. Without breaking eye contact, she lowers her lips once more against his stomach, and the heat in her eyes and the heat of her tongue make him groan again and drop his head backwards onto the floor. He feels her smile against his navel as she nuzzles his thin trail of hair and places a heated kiss low against the joint of his hip, sending shivers up his spine, to his toes, to his groin. He gasps as she fingers the waistline of his pants.

"Whoa. Whoa, whoa." He sits up and pulls her to a stop and she blinks hooded, darkened eyes at him, and the words to say that they should stop, that he separately promised both her parents, that he has things to do today and doesn't want to be spent, choke in his throat. He swallows and simply gasps, "Door," before he scrambles to his feet, throws the lock, and haphazardly shoves his dresser back in front of it. He flops back down into his original spot, and pulls her face up for a breathless series of kisses.

She determinedly moves from his mouth to his neck, to his shoulder, to his chest, crawling down his body and shifting to settle between his legs, winding him tighter with every fleeting brush of her lips.

Her breast brushes his heated cock and he curses under his breath, one hand finding its way between her shoulder blades to pull her closer. She forms a delicious little noise at the contact and pauses a moment, her breath hot and damp against his skin, before she slowly repeats the movement, the muscles in her back writhing seductively. He shifts, pressing himself between her breasts and rocking his hips along with her next wave of movements, each new burst of friction making him more dizzy.

She stifles a moan, one hand splayed against the floor the other hungrily gripping his side, both trembling. She presses as close to him as she can, her body between his thighs, her cheek against his waist, trying to get closer, to sink into him, but it's not working, she's not satisfied. Then her hands are on his pants, pulling them down, and before he can yelp out her name she's flung herself back against him with a groan, his whole length flush between her breasts. And it's skin against skin and his hand in her hair and he's gasping for breath and she slips her tongue into his navel.

She abruptly slinks lower so her chest presses against his balls, and she drops her lips and kisses the very tip of his cock. And it's so chaste, and so unexpected, and so very her that he explodes, eyes rolling, heart pounding, jaw clenched into a grimace. His groin clenches. His back arches. Everything he is drains away to leave him blissfully exhausted and light headed and mostly naked, and when the great tattoo of his heartbeat fades from his ears and his vision clears, he looks down at her to see her startled, green eyes and her face splashed with ejaculate.

"Shit, Blondie, I'm sorry," he pants, guiding her up to wipe her face clean as delicately as he can given his fumbling fingers. The tip of her tongue slips out to run across her marked lips, and he stares in dumbstruck awe as she tastes him, blushes, and wraps her arms around his neck, pulling him into a slow, deep kiss.

AN: Hey, folks. I'm going on vacation for the holidays and I'm not going to have a lot of time for writing. Updates are going to slow, but they will return in due course. I've left you on a smutty high note so you will hopefully forgive me. I'd also like to take this opportunity to say how great you all are for reading and reviewing and favoring and recommending this. Seriously. Cheers!