100 Themes, 100 Moments

by Ella Lola

Sometimes you need to be there, in the moment and magic, to fully understand how powerful their love was. But for the truth, they didnt know. They just knew that it was powerful enough to last forever, and that was enough.

2. Want

To want something is a sin. That's what my mother said, but it never bothered me in the slightest. I always got what I needed, never what I wanted simply because I never wanted anything that I never needed. It was just common sense. That's why when I stared at Amu's sleeping body on my couch I felt like I was breaking some personal law or a crossing a sentimental line.

I had only ever meant to be friends with Amu. That was all I ever knew. But just by looking at her without trying to figure out what all the clever little things that passed her lips meant, I knew I felt more than just friendship towards her.

Every single fibre of my being just wanted to curl up next to her and fall asleep in an innocent gesture and wake up to her surprised face. But I was a coward. She was just so beautiful and amazing and completely interesting and I was just so plain and lanky and completely boring in every angle of comparison.

So I did the first thing that seemed logical. I left her sleeping on my couch and walked up to my room to collapse onto my bed. Amu was more than just a friend to me. My whole soul agreed with it.

I felt a tight horrible ache in my chest. I picked up my pillow and smothered my face in it. I would do anything for the love of Amu Hinamori. It was a disastrous mixture of wanting and needing but through the hurricane of thoughts that spiralled through my mind, I knew one thing.

I would die over and over again, excruciatingly and horrifyingly, just to see her smiling at me every day- even if she forever saw me as her best friend.