Hey, wow uber quick update =] Thought I'd get it finished before the weekend because I'm going back home for some kind of family thing. I'm sorry if there are any huge great stare-at-you-in-the-face errors, I'll blame them on lack of sleep although I think I corrected them all.

I don't own Supernatural.

Chapter 3

For a few days or rather a week or two, I lost track of the time. It seemed to merge into one giant blur. We had been tracking Bella with Bobby's help, he'd pass on any information he had or was given but it was no use we would always be one step behind her. Eventually though, we had to catch up with her but with the trail going dead we had to pick up other hunts. Not only were we desperate to find Bella but we we're desperate to save Dean from his deal.

With no new lead on Bella we returned to Bobby's. I'd never been to Bobby's but could imagine it being as neat and tidy and his hotel room that we saw a week or two ago. Dean announced that we were an hour away from Bobby's something I was glad to hear. The last week being on the constant look out for Bella had been a challenge. Tempers were short, everyone was tired and I wanted to some time away from Sam and Dean. To hear that we were so close to Bobby's was music to my ears. If we took a short break then maybe we would all feel refreshed to go at Dean's demon problem again as well as working a case at the same time.

Outside the rain was pelting against the car window, it reflected the mood in the car nicely. Sometime ago I'd sought refuge behind yet another book as Sam and Dean bickered like children, their main bone of contention was Bella. As it was neither of them knew they were just making suggestions which the other would then shoot down. In all honesty I was getting sick of hearing it. However, I kept quiet. Definitely a wise move.

The last hour of the journey couldn't pass quick enough. I was fidgety, I was tired and just down right miserable. Determined to get to Bobby's Dean had insisted on driving solidly for 5 hours without stopping, man was I desperate to use a bathroom. I'd heard that fortune favours the brave, whoever said that was liar. A few towns back I'd politely asked if we could stop to use a bathroom. I think it's fair to say we didn't stop. Dean would pay for that once things had clamed.

Listen to me rambling on; I'm not painting a very nice harmonious picture, am I? It hadn't been all doom and gloom. We'd managed a quick hunt in Sterling, Colorado. A spirit of a jilted lover, the case only lasted one day. It was shame really, despite it being nice that it was easy peasy lemon squeezy I wouldn't have minded it dragging on for a few days. Oh well, we were almost at Bobby's perhaps then I could get a car and take off on my own for a few weeks. If only to give us all a break. I'm sure, despite Sam saying otherwise, that I was a burden on them. With all the pressure they were under to get Dean out of his deal they didn't need to be concerned with me. I'd yet to voice this to them, I was planning on springing it on them once we arrived. It would be easier that way or at least that was what I was thinking. If I stayed on the road with them much longer I'd run the risk of becoming too dependent on them. I was starting to loose sight of what really mattered to me. Sure Sam mattered to me, he mattered an awful lot but so did the hunting. If I kept travelling with the Winchesters' it would mean once less hunter working a case. Bobby had cases and so did Ellen, if I took them on then it would give Sam and Dean more freedom to find a way for Dean to live. Or so I hoped.

I abandoned my book in favour of piecing together a speech for when I dropped my bomb shell. Maybe I should have talked to Sam about it first but I was afraid that he would try to talk me out of it, something I wouldn't pay any attention to. Once my mind was made up it was made up. Several times I'd been declared as stubborn as a mule by Dean. I couldn't help it if I was one to stick to my guns, very rarely did I do otherwise. Finally giving into my feelings towards Sam had been one of those rare occasions, one which something good had emerged from but that wasn't guaranteed to happen every time.

As we turned towards a house in the dark I assumed that we had arrived at Bobby's. My curiosity to see other people's homes ignited. As soon Dean announced that we'd arrived then the dark cloud that had been following us lifted. Dean was eager for some news on Bella, Sam was eager for some news that would help stop Dean's deal and I was eager to get behind the wheel of a car once again.

Finally able to leave the car I stood up and stretched whilst stifling a yawn. Every muscle in my body protested against movement but I fought on, what can I say? I was a trooper, just a very tired one.

Bobby had waited up for us and came to greet us outside; obviously I our arrival hadn't been as quiet as we'd hoped. "Boys, Alice," he nodded.

"Hey Bobby," Sam greeted, "any news?" He meant on either Bella or the deal.

"Sorry Sam," Bobby replied as he picked up one of the bags I'd set down. Sam's faltered slightly; I smiled sympathetically something he acknowledged with a sigh. I grabbed the remainder of my bags and the stack of magazines I'd been reading off the back seat. The least I could do was leave the car tidy although it was more to do with Dean's wrath if I didn't.

We followed Bobby into his house, "Bathrooms through that door and to your left," Sam whispered as he walked past. I mouthed a thank you and quickly dropped my bags near the foot of the stares and headed for the bathroom. When I returned everyone was in deep discussion over a beer. Sam handed me one which I took even though I didn't want it. I just wanted to sleep but I didn't want to seem impolite. For well over an hour we sat around the kitchen table exchanging details of recent hunts.

It wasn't until the early hours of the morning when I made it to bed. Thankfully it was a bed and not the sofa or the floor as Sam and Dean had. Bobby had a spare room with a tiny single bed in the corner. It looked to be used as a junk room and was layered in dust but I was too tired to care. Immediately I flopped down and awaited the arrival of my dear old friend sleep. That didn't happen; I was too tired to sleep. Instead I was greeted with the arrival of my not so dear friend impatience. I tossed and turned and beat my pillow into a more comfortable shape more times than I dare to count. It still beat a motel though.

Frustrated, I sat up and picked up a magazine that was poking out of my backpack. It was a house magazine, filled with peoples fancy homes all playing happy families. Why I bought it is beyond me. At the time I just wanted something that would distract me from the cruddy motel we were in. It gave me something to imagine. A roaring fire, fresh flowers on the table, that sort of thing. I would give anything for a house like that but long ago I accepted giving that up, maybe if Dean survived his deal I would call it a day on the hunting. Then again, maybe not, it had become too much a part of me now.

I turned the page to yet another immaculate house. It was certainly nothing like the one I was staying in at the moment. Bobby's house had defied my expectations of being neat. It was cluttered with dust ridden piles of old books and bizarre object all of which were fascinating. I'd asked Sam about a few before I went to bed but he'd only been able to tell me what half of them were for.

Lord knows what time I fell asleep it was beyond me or even what time it was when I awake. All I was aware of was the annoying sound of a shower from the room next door, groaning as my stomach rumbled I sat up and heard the thud of the magazine dropping to the floor. What do you know, I fell asleep reading it. The cover of the magazine was a depressing sight so I shoved into the depth of my backpack and trudged downstairs in my not so glamorous pink pj's with zebras.

Downstairs I found Sam sat at the table tucking into a bowl of cereal, "Morning Alice, did you sleep well?" he asked as he pulled out the chair next to him. I sat down and rested my head on his shoulder as he wrapped his free arm around my waist.

"Yeah," I replied lying through my teeth, he had enough to worry about he didn't need to hear about my own night without much sleep. "Are there any plans?" I asked already making my own plans in my head.

"None yet, Dean is in the shower and Bobby went out to pick something up," he replied.

Excellent, "good, don't plan anything we're going for a walk." Sam helped me find a bowl for some cereal and made some coffee.

"A walk?" I hadn't given him a reason but Sam being Sam had guessed that there was more behind it than just a walk.

"Yeah, I want to do something normal for a change," I replied to which Sam laughed.

After a shower and wrapping up in something warm we left Bobby's to walk. There wasn't much around; the house was isolated from anything close by. I guess that was why Bobby liked it, away from prying eyes something no hunter wanted. We walked across a field, once we'd cleared the salvage yard. "Sam," I said as I looked up at him. We'd been walking arm in arm chatting idly, before falling silent, about an old book that Bobby had on Demon hunting. I hadn't seen it but it sounded fascinating.

"I knew this wasn't just a walk," he acknowledged. I blushed, caught out.

"Well it is but it isn't," I frowned, confused at my own statement. Ignoring that thought I pressed on with what I wanted to talk to Sam about, "I've been thinking," dear god could I not have come up with a better way to word things.

"About?" Sam asked as we turned a corner in the field.

"Hunting, now we're at Bobby's I want to hunt alone again for a while. We all need our space and maybe you and Dean can spend more time on finding a way out of his Demon deal whilst I pick up some of the hunts that Bobby has been sending our way," I honestly thought it was a good idea.

Sam sighed, "There's no way of talking you out of it is there?"

"Absolutely none what so ever," I replied.

"I want you around though, you aren't a burden," despite knowing he couldn't talk me out of it he still tried.

"I know Sam but for weeks now all I've done is sit in the back of the car, I'm restless and with Dean only having a few months the last thing you need is me being a distraction. Dean should be your priority," by the look on Sam's face I knew that he knew I was right. We weren't breaking up, far from it in fact, we just had a job to do.

"You're right but I don't want you to be right," Sam confessed. By now we'd come to a stop under the shade of a tree.

"It's all we've got at the moment. You, Dean and Bobby can trawl through everything you've got to find and answer and I'll help when I can," no matter what we were talking about we nearly always strayed onto the topic of Dean's deal. It broke my heart to see Sam suffer as he worried about Dean.

Sam smiled, "I know you'll help."

My face brightened, Sam had given in with no trouble at all, "so it's decided then." He was going to reply but I kissed him as a way of silencing any protests.

Sam didn't complain, "I guess so," he may not have been entirely convinced but it was the best we had at the moment.

"It's not ideal but we'll cope," I sighed. Having spent every day with Sam for a few months to suddenly not be around him would be difficult, "We'll have to make the most of the time we spend together." I hadn't thought this far ahead in the grand scheme of things; I had thought or rather hoped that it would be easy to part from Sam for a while. Oh how mistaken I was. Forget Vampires or Shapeshifters, they were easy but this, this was the hardest thing I've ever done but it was the right thing.

Under the shade of the tree, hidden from the world, I couldn't think of anywhere else I'd rather be or anyone else I'd rather be with. Words went unsaid, they weren't needed all that was needed to be said was said when our lips touched.

It was a kiss laced with a sad goodbye, it would only be for a short while but it would feel like an eternity. I made sure to savour every moment of it, wrapped safely in the warmth of Sam's arms as if, for a short period of time nothing else mattered.

We broke apart, still resting our foreheads together, neither one of us willing to return to our version of normality. "We should get back," Sam muttered but neither he nor I made any inclination to move. With one last kiss we returned, hand in hand to Bobby's to face the job at hand.

Dean looked up as we walked in through the back door, "I don't want to know what you two have been up to."

Sam rolled his eyes, "we we're just talking."

"Sure you were Sammy," he grinned. I couldn't help but smile also; the little bit light heartedness was contagious.

"Mind out of the gutter Dean Winchester," I scolded but with humour, "is Bobby back?"

"He might be," Dean was definitely in a brighter mood, I was right to think that a break would do us all some good. I frowned and apparently Sam had done the same, "don't look at me like that, the two of you are unbelievable, he's in his study." Sam went to fetch Bobby and I made coffee for us all. This was going to be a long discussion.

Dean didn't disagree with the decision I'd made, he was surprised more than anything. I know he would never admit it but he appreciated the sacrifice I was making with Sam so that he could stop Lilith and her deal. Bobby could get a car sorted for me by the evening and then, as soon as a hunt turned up I would be on my way.

A part of me was looking forward to the freedom again but another part and it was a big part didn't want to be away from Sam. I would deal with it, I just didn't like it but it wasn't a matter of whether I liked it.

That evening we sat down with a few beers and a stack of old dusty books from the stacks that littered Bobby's study in desperate search of any kind of weapon to use against Lilith. I wasn't as accustomed with the books as the other three experienced hunters. The Latin and ancient symbols baffled me more than once, Sam was sat next to me and seeing me struggle several times had helped me out. I'd tried not to let it show that I was struggling but he'd seen straight though it. It was certainly fascinating work although; some of the descriptions were fairly gruesome. The way hell was described sent shivers down my spine. It was definitely something that I'd never wish upon a person. What was happening to Dean was beyond unfair but he'd done it to save Sam. I would do the same for my family or rather I would have done the same. Since being with Sam I'd decided that I wouldn't dwell on my family's death so much. I couldn't change what had happened, instead I'd come to a kind of acceptance and was left with nothing but the need to plough on with life.