Here it is…the promised EPOV. It took less time than I thought to write, so I was able to update earlier than planned. I hope you like it; I know Edward isn't portrayed very well in this chapter. SPOILER ALERT: Over the next couple of chapters, Bella is the one you're going to hate. In this chapter…uch, Edward isn't the guy we know and love. It flashes through the last couple of years and explains some of the secrets he's got. It's basically just showing some of the things he's gone through in his life.

Answering a few more questions: Yes, Edward is really Avery's father. Yes, Bella knows everything about Edward's rocket past and you will too (soon!). And Yes, Bella is only staying with Edward because he's the father of her baby, he's good to her, and…that's pretty much it.

Only eleven reviews for the last chapter? I appreciate any reviews at all…but why has the number gone down? Please continue to review, though, and tell me what you're thinking and how you like the story. Again, I answer all questions the best I can.

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EPOV, October, 17 Years Old:

I drink and do drugs. It's nearly every night now. I don't give a fuck want my parents think or say- Carlisle and Esme Cullen, just sticking their noses in my business. They might be my parents, but they don't know a single thing about me and they don't care. I haven't been home for three weeks, so it's not really home anymore. I sleep on my friends James' couch and its good enough for me.

All these people, clustered around James and I, they all know who we are. But I don't know them- not their names or faces or anything else. All I know are their drugs of choice and how much they're going to want. It's cocaine tonight, some that James just got in. He's only a year older than me but he's been dealing drugs since he was fifteen. I don't know where he gets it; I don't want to know, so I don't bother to ask. He sets up the lines for the both of us, and then hands me a rolled up bill.

It feels good; better than I've felt before in my life. Because it doesn't matter.

March, 17 Years Old:

The pain in my chest was getting heavier. The constant coughing doesn't help, either. And I would do anything for a line of cocaine right now. The withdrawal- it hurts so bad that I'm constantly thinking that I would rather do so much coke that I blow out my nose than go through this for any longer. Rebab is shit; I'm not even sure why I'm here after the first two months have been this bad.

What I really want, but refuse to admit, is to go home with my parents. Because there, I'm taken care of. Esme would be annoying and nosy as always but would do my laundry and cook my meals. Carlisle would be an ass and act like he knew all, but he'd also help me apply for colleges. I was past that, though. I had left them, and now there was no way they would let me back into their home. They hadn't seen me hit rock bottom, but I guess they've figured it out by now. I gave the rehabilitation clinic permission to send them a letter when I checked in, since I'm only seventeen and had no way to pay. Although they didn't try and contact me, they did, however, pay for it. But that was all, nothing more and nothing less. I didn't have the guts to thank them, and I knew I would be too ashamed to face them when I got out of here.

In return, I would never bother them again.

April, 19 Years Old:

I hate college. I got my GED after finishing rehab, but college feels absolutely pointless to me. I don't even know what I want to do; I haven't declared my major yet even though I'm finishing up my sophomore year now. And the people here are intolerable. As a recovering drug addict, I'm not supposed to drink. But everyone around me seems to be doing just that. It may sound like a pointless stereotype, but it's also so true in this case.

After the end of this semester, I'm done. There's no point, I probably don't have enough money to finish up the next two years anyway. I'll get a job somewhere, save up some money, and maybe come back to college if I ever figure out what I ever want to do with myself and my life.

I still haven't gotten the courage to talk to my parents. Once, I found myself driving to the house, in the suburbs of Seattle, but I quickly turned the car around and drove around aimlessly instead.

January, 20 Years Old:

The room is spinning slightly and my head is pounding and I'm not even sure why I'm here. One of the guys I work with invited me to a party, and when I came I promptly got drunk. I'm still not supposed to drink…but it feels right. I know I'm drunk but I like the familiar feeling, I let it wash over me. There's a girl, a pretty brunette, standing near me, practically falling down drunk. She's tripping on the solid ground, unable to hold her herself up. Groaning to myself, I reach over and grab her arm, holding her steady.

And the next hour or so passes in a blur. All of a sudden the girl, Bella, and I are in the bathroom, groping each other and kissing frantically. She's not asking me to stop, and I don't want to. She feels good and makes me feel good. She's warm, and I've been so cold and numb. I don't stop, because Bella's still not asking me to. She wants more, and I give it to her. At one point I register that she must be a virgin, but by the time I process it…she's not anymore. Bella didn't ask me to wear a condom, so I didn't. I never thought that would be the moment to change my life forever.

March, 20 Years Old:

I came home from work at four, as usual, and I was stunned to see Bella perched on the stoop of my apartment building. She's just looking up at me, red nose and watery eyes, and I don't know what to say. "It's not safe for you to be sitting up here." Was all I could spit out, and Bella wordlessly stood up and looked at me.

"Edward, I'm pregnant." She said in a raw, cracked voice.

I just stare at her, at a loss for words, wondering how she even managed to find me. She stares right back, her jaw set and her arms folded across her chest. Finally, I find words. "Why don't you come inside…?"

We talked about a lot of stuff that night, agreeing that we would at least live together for the sake of our unborn child. She offers to take a paternity test once the baby is born, but I tell her it isn't necessary. I've known Bella for a very short time, and already I can tell that she's a bad liar, and she would be shit at poker. There's something about her, though, that I can't quite place my finger on. I have a feeler she's a lot stronger and braver than I'm giving her credit for. I can see that much in the way she hold herself, and I know that I can do this. I'm scared shitless to be a father, because I don't even know how to be a father. But she's scared shitless to be a mother, so we'll just be scared shitless together and hope that we don't permanently fuck our kid up.

I talk to her dad, and throughout the whole conversation I was sure he was going to pull the gun out of his belt and shoot me full of bullets for both deflowering his daughter and then getting her pregnant. At Seventeen. I didn't know she was seventeen and her age, among other things, is something I should have asked her that night. But I didn't bother, so now I'm going to have to man up and accept the consequences.

This situation isn't ideal or even wanted. But in some twisted, messed up way, it's giving me the kick in the ass I need to finally get my life back on track.

Present, 21 Years Old:

Bella knows all of my secrets. She's the only one that knows about the drugs, except for the people at the few meetings I went to and all the people I encountered in rehab and all the people I did drugs with. She knows about my family, she knows about my problems with myself, but she's still here. I know she doesn't love me, that she's just sticking around to give Avery a somewhat normal family, but that's okay. Because that's the only reason I'm sticking around too. I like Bella, but she's practically a child herself. She changes her mind in a split second, and she's unpredictable.

Half the time, I'm just waiting around for the day that she's going to walk out on me.

…

So…what did you think of the insight in EPOV? I know it was off the way and kind of all over the place, but that's how Edward is in this story. Please review, and let me know what's on your mind.

Xoxo- Melodyella aka Mellie