Yikes, this is out later than I planned. But Blakely is still having some troubles, so that's that. But thanks for being so patient with me. I have some bad news and, well, some more bad news.

The first piece of news is that this update is going to be a bit short. The other bad news is that I have no idea when I'll update again- it'll probably be another week or so, or maybe sooner if things in real life die down a little bit. But I promise to do my best to get the next chapter out whenever I get the chance. Thanks a million for all your reviews and support!

My pre-reader is gone again, so this one is all me.

…

BPOV

I was nervous. I fidgeted restlessly, running a brush through my hair and applying more chapstick and running a lint brush over my dress for the millionth time. It was Avery's first birthday, and I was going to see her for the first in months. It was a lot to take in.

I continued to look in the mirror, wondering if I looked okay. My dark red dress hit right at me knee and my makeup was light. I didn't want to look like I was trying too hard, even though I wanted nothing more than to look as good as I possibly good. I could only imagine what Edward's parents thought of me, and I already knew how Edward felt. But I owed him everything for even letting me come tonight.

Missing Avery was worse than I had ever anticipated. I knew from the start that it would be hard, because she was my baby. Despite the difficult circumstances that I hated, she would always have all of my love, and more. Even with everything that has happened to me, I cannot bring myself to fully regret my decision to leave. Otherwise, I'd still be miserable in Forks, and I wouldn't know how much I really love Edward.

For months, I've been kidding myself, trying to convince myself that I care for Edward, but nothing more. Trying to tell myself that because of our circumstances, I would never really be able to love him. Because for a long time, I had tried to convince myself that Edward had gotten me pregnant and taken away what was left of my youth. But there was no use ignoring the truth anymore- Edward and I were both at fault for me getting pregnant. And while Edward tried his hardest to take care of me and Avery, I had just tried my hardest to remain unattached.

And look where that's gotten me.

I still have nightmares about that night- I haven't had a good night's sleep since then. I can still feel their hands all over me, I can still remember every unwanted touch, and I still remember that no one came to my rescue or to Jane's.

…..

"You're sure about this right?" My mom asked anxiously, peering out the car window at the Cullen's house.

"Yeah." I whispered, chewing on my lower lip as I concentrated on the bright pink wrapped box in my lap. "I really need to do this mom. I miss her."

My mom nodded, and then rubbed my shoulder gently. "I'm sorry I can't come." She murmured. "I would, you know. Just to make it a little easier on you. But work-"

"I know." I interrupted, looking up at her and shrugging slightly. "I appreciate everything you've done for me, but I can do this. I just…I don't want all of them to hate me." I said in a small voice. "Edward's parents know what I did…they must hate me. And Alice and Charlie and Edward…" I trailed off, not even wanting to think about how awful they could treat me, because even I had to admit that I deserved it.

"You'll be fine, Bella. Your father loves you, and I know he'll always be there for you. He might not agree with the choices that you have made, but he's still your dad." She said soothing, and then looked at the time and groaned. "I'm sorry, honey, but I really have to get going. I'm sure everything will be fine, but if you need me I'm a phone call away." She assured me. "I love you."

"Okay…thanks for the ride. I love you too." I managed to mumble, and then leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. I got out of the car with Avery's present in my arms. I watched my mom wave and then slowly drive away, and then I took a huge deep breath and turned around. When I did, Edward was standing in the doorway of the house, smiling slightly with his arms crossed over his chest.

I slowly walked up the short path to the house, and then ducked my head. "Hi." I said softly. "Thank you for inviting me."

"Hey." Edward replied. "Um, no problem." He said, his voice a little rough. "You can come in." He added, holding the front door open wider and letting me go in ahead of him.

"Thanks." I said again, stepping into the house. It was large but cozy, and it smelled like cookies and vanilla.

Edward stepped ahead of me again, looking over his shoulder at me. His eyes were bright and warm, but still wary. "Everyone is already here…you can just come in here." He finally said, and then led me into the living room. I followed him stiffly, tensing up even further when we walked into the room. Edward's parents were seated on one of the couches, and Alice and Charlie were on the other. Avery was on Alice's lap, laughing happily as Alice cooed at her.

They all fell silent as I walked into the room, but I didn't blame them at all.

"Um, Bella's here." Edward finally spoke, and Esme stood up. She looked a little unsure at first, but she approached me anyway.

"Hello, Bella. I'm not sure if you remember, but we've met once before…at the bookstore." Esme extended her hand to me, and Edward quickly took the present out of my arms so I could shake Esme's hand.

"Yes." I said, my voice cracking slightly. "Thank you for having me." I added, feeling small and cowardly.

Esme smiled, a little tightly, but it was a smile nonetheless. "Well, come sit down."

…..

Sorry for the mini-cliffhanger, but I've got to get going. I have to pick Jensen up at the train station…he was out of town for the day.

Please review!

Xoxo- Melodyella aka Mellie