The Gate Amidst the Ivy

Chapter Nine

The next day, Sakura awoke to the sound of a sharp knock at her door.

She rose quickly, conditioned by years of working in Castle Konoha. Glancing over hastily at the mirror, a luxury not available to her previously, she concluded that her hair was not too mussed and quickly patted it down. She was glad she'd worn her outer petticoats to sleep—all she had to do was put on just one more modesty shift.

By then, the knocking was incessant and impatient. "Coming!" she called out. "I'm just getting dressed!" Sakura then froze in horror. At Castle Konoha, that might have been a perfectly fine thing to say, but here, surrounded by all these ladies and rich daughters, it might be unspeakably impolite.

Sakura sighed to herself. What was done was done—she would merely act completely unashamed, and hopefully the servant on the other side of the door would play along with her. But she must remind herself that slip-ups like that were not to be tolerated in the main castle.

Confident that she was at least presentable if not pretty, she opened the door.

Ayame stared coldly back at her from the hallway. "I trust you are done… changing?"

Sakura briefly struggled with the urge to tell Ayame No, I'm not, that's why I'm standing here naked in front of you, but recognized that as even more inappropriate. "Yes, thank you for your concern," she told the other girl instead, arching an eyebrow to convey her thoughts on the question.

"I have been told by my overseer that Prince Sasuke recently ordered that you are to be moved to the Green Room by the end of the week, and your status as a handmaiden removed." Ayame's keen eyes focused on Sakura, as though hoping to find out the reasons behind such an unorthodox command from Sakura's face alone.

Sakura's impassive face belied her shock. The Green Room… it was right next to Ino's room, wasn't it? Ino was at the Blue Room… what, the high-and-mighty prince couldn't decide who really opened the garden? Damn it… she'd known she shouldn't have done anything with the prince! And now look where it got her! She had to protect Ino as well as maintain her deception… well, it should be simple enough, right? Just steadfastly insist that it was Ino who found the garden and then let her in on the secret, and who would be there to deny it? And there was always a possibility that this move was just to shake her up, make her panic and reveal something she shouldn't, a bluff on Prince Sasuke's part. Well, she wouldn't shake up. She wouldn't give him anything.

She almost missed the last part of Ayame's statement. "You are to serve breakfast to the ladies in the Sunset Parlor at half past ten. The Lady Hideki and the Lady Ino will be dining there. I will also join you," the brunette informed Sakura.

Sakura glanced quickly at the clock. It has half past nine. The ball must have exhausted her, which was why she woke so late today. "Thank you, Fumiko," she said shortly, and nodded.

"Please," Ayame said airily, "call me by my first name, Ayame." The almost-friendly tone seemed out of place with her chiseled-ice expression.

Sakura stared at Ayame, bewildered. What was… from anyone else, such words might have been a gesture of friendship. They certainly were at Castle Konoha, but with these handmaidens, who knew? She briefly considered her options. She could rebuff Ayame. If it were an honest attempt at friendship (which she highly doubted), Ayame would feel insulted… she could have alienated a potential friend. If it were just a joke, well, how much would it hurt to play along? Sakura had no illusions about Ayame, and if this was just some sort of strange amusement for the other girl, she wouldn't be unduly disappointed. So Sakura smiled politely and said, "Then allow me to correct myself. Thank you, Ayame."

"Let us walk to the kitchens together. Our destination is the same, after all," offered Ayame abruptly. Her sharp eyes dared Sakura to refuse.

"Of course, Ayame," murmured Sakura, staring carefully at Ayame. Why was Ayame being so carefully diplomatic, so studiously friendly? She'd been anything but kind the last time they'd met, eager to be rid of her, and now… now she was suggesting they walk to the kitchens together?

Sakura spent a few minutes in front of the mirror, while Ayame hovered almost uncertainly at her doorway. The former servant cared very little about her appearance, but handmaidens were held up to a certain standard at the main castle, a certain standard that Sakura had to conform to in order to avoid embarrassing Ino.

Confident her hair no longer looked like a rat's nest, she followed Ayame out towards the kitchens. An oppressive, awkward silence descended over the two, like thick molasses. Sakura was disinclined to break it.

To her surprise, somewhere along the turns and twists on the way to the kitchens, Ayame cut through the silence with a voice like a knife. "There have been rumors that you… that you know magic," she began abruptly, without any buildup whatsoever.

Should she reveal her expertise? Well, what harm could it do? If anything, the handmaidens might give her an iota more of respect. "Yes," confirmed Sakura. "Not much, though," she tagged on hastily, "but enough to get by. My teacher only taught me some basic healing magicks."

"Healing magicks." It was not a question, just a statement, and Sakura was unsure how to reply to it. She stayed silent. Was Ayame making small talk? No, there was too much of a certain urgency in her voice for her questions to ever be considered small talk…

"Have you—have you ever healed others before?" prodded Ayame again.

(You're just a little girl! You've probably never even healed before—

Yes, I have! I've dragged people back from the edge of death—I've saved more lives than I know how to count—how dare you, Mama? How dare you?

You self-important little brat! You think you're too good for this? You think you can waste what I've built for you?

You bitter old woman! All you've ever done is bring misery into every life you've ever touched—)

"A—a few cuts, sometimes. Once a girl in my village broke her arm. I helped set it. Oh, and there was once a fisherman who came down with food poisoning. I healed him then," answered Sakura quietly. It wasn't the whole truth, but none of it was a lie either. She just hadn't healed such trivial injuries since her beginner's training…

"Oh. But… nothing… nothing—" Ayame seemed to be struggling for the right words.

"No, nothing on a serious scale," completed Sakura. Well, now that was an outright lie, but she'd been doing enough of it ever since she'd become a servant. What was one more little white lie to the mix?

For a moment, there seemed to be an expression of deep sadness on the older girl's face, but then it was gone, replaced by Ayame's typical cold features. She sneered. "Well, I suppose a village healer wouldn't be skilled enough to teach you the more advanced healing magicks, now, would she? My sister has shown great promise at magic. She gets personal tutoring from one of the most skilled healers in the country each week."

(Wow, Granny Tsunade! That was—that was amazing! What are you doing here in the village? Why aren't you at the castle, researching, healing—?

You wouldn't understand now, Sakura, but… it was… too much for me. Here, I can be… well, not happy, but I can be… satisfied. Yes, satisfied.)

"On the contrary," said Sakura coldly, "my mentor was one of the most skilled healers I have ever known."

"Which must be a precious few, isn't it?" sneered Ayame back.

Sakura gave her a look which ought to have frozen her, had Ayame not been the ice queen herself. She did not deign to reply and wondered instead at the other girl's abrupt turnabout. First she had been cold, almost cruel but not quite—then, she had been tentative, bearable if not friendly—and now, she was deliberately cruel.

They continued to the kitchens in deathly silence.

When they made their way into the Sunset Parlor, it was twenty minutes past ten, yet Ino and the Lady Hideki were already deep in conversation. Sakura carefully held a bowl of blueberries, a bowl of sugar, and two plates with omelettes, while Ayame balanced several glasses of orange juice, water, and tea.

The Sunset Parlor was aptly named. Its west wall was composed entirely of glass, and Sakura could imagine the deep reds and pinks and golds that would stain the room at sunset. The walls were painted a deep yellow that reminded her of the burning sun, and the intricately carved furniture was upholstered with burnt oranges, dark pinks, and ochres. In the middle of the room, where the table was, Ino sat on one end, wearing a pastel pink dress covered with frothy lace. The Lady Hideki sat on the other end in a deep velvet red, a color traditionally reserved for women of the night—yet something about the way she wore it, about the set of her shoulders, about the deep huskiness of her voice, indicated that she was most definitely not for sale.

Ino looked up when the two girls entered, and the Lady Hideki paused in her lively joke. Her light shallow blue eyes were still sparkling with humor, and she gave a small smile to Sakura, who was surprised. Ladies rarely acknowledged the existence of handmaidens, much less smile at them. Smiling back, Sakura placed the bowl of blueberries and the bowl of sugar in the middle of the table and put a plate of omelettes in front of each lady. Ayame curtsied to both ladies (though she curtsied deeper to the Lady Hideki, noticed Sakura with the slightest touch of resentment).

Ino hardly acknowledged their presence, and instead turned back to the Lady Hideki. "What were you saying, Isabi?" she asked. "Lord Toshi said what to the Lady Morikawa?"

"Oh!" Lady Hideki patted down her curled blonde locks. Her mobile mouth smiled wide, and the deep red lipstick which would have looked cheap on anyone else instead made her all the more beautiful. "So he asks her, 'Ah, then, madame, how many children have you?', and she slaps him!"

Ino and Lady Hideki dissolved into uncontrollable giggles as Sakura watched awkwardly. She and Ayame had obviously arrived too late to understand the joke.

After the two ladies had quieted down a bit, Lady Hideki turned to Sakura. "I understand you are my darling Ino's handmaiden?" she purred charmingly.

"Oh—yes, I am, my Lady Hideki."

"Please, call me Isabi. That's my given name. Yet there are still those who persist on calling me by my last name, Hideki. How many times must I tell people that my husband is long dead and gone? And yet still the ladies insist on 'maintaining propriety,' those gossiping little hypocrites," laughed Lady Hideki good-naturedly.

Ayame shifted uncomfortably.

Lady Hideki turned back to Sakura. "And I must say, dear Ino has told me so many stories about you. I understand you two were quite close at Castle Konoha?" She smiled disarmingly.

Sakura stiffened. Lady Hideki wasn't quite so kind as people seemed to think, then. Such a subtly probing question was a question into the dynamics of her relationship with Ino, a well-positioned, well-hidden trap. If she admitted that Ino was her friend, then that signified that Ino didn't have any idea how to act as a lady, how to maintain the proper boundaries between the lower classes and the upper class—regardless that they had been equals at Castle Konoha. The ladies here didn't care about that, and to even admit Ino had once been a servant would further degrade the blonde in their eyes.

Instead, she settled for, "Yes, we often saw each other around Castle Konoha."

Ino in turn stiffened and stared at Sakura with wounded cornflower blue eyes (—so much like Naruto's—), as though insulted and saddened by Sakura's implicit denial of any friendship. But didn't Ino understand? Didn't she know Sakura was doing this for her own good, to make her fit in more with the ladies? But her lips tightened in the way they always did when she was particularly hurt or upset, and she turned back to Lady Hideki. "Yes, that's true, Isabi," corroborated Ino. "We often… saw each other around."

(You aren't—friends—with Naruto, are you, Sakura?

N-no, Mama… we just… happen to see each other around.

—Wounded blue eyes, so much like Ino's, overhearing—I thought we were friends, Sakura-chan—

Yes, we are!

Then why—why did you lie?)

Lady Hideki nodded, her smile beguiling and understanding and absolutely bewitching. "Oh, yes, that makes sense. Castle Konoha is such a small castle, after all!"

Sakura blinked. Castle Konoha was by no means small. It was larger than three of her village put together. Though she supposed it was tiny compared to the main castle…

Isabi reached out a dainty hand and stirred several teaspoons of sugar into her tea. Sakura's teeth almost hurt at the very thought of so much sugar. "Are you going to have any sugar, darling Ino?" inquired Lady Hideki politely. "I must confess, Mother tells me I ought watch my figure, but sugar is such a wonderful thing!"

Ino shook her head. "Thank you, but no, Isabi. I haven't… I am not accustomed to much sugar."

You might as well scream out loud to the castle that you were born poor, Ino, born dirt poor, thought Sakura furiously. Only the poor were not accustomed to sugar—it was highly popular amongst the ladies, as much for its high cost as well as its sweet taste. It represented everything the poor did not have and everything the rich did. Ino should have taken spoonfuls and spoonfuls of it just to show to Lady Hideki how cultured she was, how rich she was, no matter how much she might have dislike sugar.

To Lady Hideki's credit, she did not sneer or even react at all. She merely laughed it off and, taking a small sip of the tea, made a face. "Oh, I'm afraid I've added much too much sugar. Now it tastes like I'm drinking molasses, honestly."

Ino smiled. "These omelettes are delicious. Do you know how to make these?"

Sakura winced again. Only a servant would ask a question like that. Ladies would instead ask the name of the cook who had made the omelettes, so that they could specifically request omelettes from that particular servant in the future. Ladies were seen as far above lowly kitchen work, after all. She chanced a look at Ayame, who was smiling almost viciously at Ino's faux-pas.

"Eggs, I imagine!" trilled Lady Hideki. "I'm afraid I shouldn't have too much, however. I need to watch my figure!"

"My darling Isabi," smiled Ino, "you're quite trim enough already."

"Oh, hush, you, inflating my ego like that! You know, maintaining a figure is a constant job. Exhausting, tedious… almost as tiring as servant work, I'd imagine!"

Ino stiffened, and Sakura stiffened as well in anticipation of her next social misstep, but thankfully the blonde remained silent.

"But, ooh, blueberries. I must tell you, I have an absolute weakness for blueberries," gushed Lady Hideki. She carefully chose a beautifully ripe blueberry from the bowl and plopped it in her mouth.

"How does it taste?" asked Ino curiously.

"Mmmm, heavenly. So sweet, so ripe! I wonder where they got such delicious blueberries. It's not blueberry season, is it?"

"Not that I'm aware of."

"Well, regardless, my dear, you must try these. It's a lifetime experience, I assure you!"

"Very well then," laughed Ino. "If they're as good as you say they are, then of course." She took a handful and spread them out on her plate, plopping one in. "Mmm!" she said, surprised. "They are sweet! I don't think I've ever tasted blueberries so sweet!"

Lady Hideki nodded, taking another one. "Surprising to find such sweet blueberries out of season, isn't it?"

"Mhmm," Ino agreed, still chewing on the mouthful she had taken earlier. Laughingly, she told Lady Hideki, "You had better take all the blueberries you want now, Isabi, or else I can't guarantee that you'll have them later!"

Isabi laughed. "Oh, Ino! You are such a witty girl, Ino—you always make me laugh." She smiled widely and stirred her tea, which was cold by now. "Oh, look," pouted Lady Hideki, her magnificent features looking genuinely put-out, "the tea's cold. Ayame, go and fetch some tea for me, will you? Not now, but in a few minutes."

"Of course," acquiesced Ayame demurely.

"I want to tell you—" Isabi coughed suddenly, a perplexed expression on her face. "I—" her voice became hoarse all of a sudden. "I think I'm losing my voice," she said, panicked, her words rough and grating, unlike the bewitching huskiness of her voice earlier.

Ino swayed in her chair. "I have such a headache," she moaned, her voice slowly getting rougher as well. She looked up, her eyes terrified and unseeing. "The shadows—the shadows—they're chasing—" her voice gave out at the end of the sentence. She staggered up, her eyes wide and unseeing, focused on some terror that only she could see.

Ayame froze in place, then went to Lady Hideki, comforting her. Sakura, worried, rushed to Ino. "Ino—Ino, are you alright? What's wrong, Ino?"

Ino's throat worked soundlessly, but only silence came out. She tripped again and would have fallen on the floor had not Sakura held her up.

Sakura quickly catalogued Ino's symptoms. Loss of balance, dilated pupils, headache, hallucinations—the blueberries! Oh gods, the blueberries! Their sweetness, their deadly sweetness—

"Ayame!" called Sakura sharply. The brunette jumped and turned away from Lady Hideki, who was in hysterics.

"What?" retorted Ayame shrilly, nearly panicking herself.

"Listen to me, Ayame," murmured Sakura soothingly, authoritatively, using the doctor voice she'd picked up from Granny Tsunade. "The blueberries were not blueberries. They were berries from the plant belladonna. I'm going to see what I can do with my knowledge of healing magic, but I'm going to need some drugs as well. Go to the castle's doctor. See if he has any opiates, especially morphine. If he doesn't, then at the very least get some general anesthetic. Do you understand me, Ayame? You need to help me save Ino's life."

"Wh-why?" insisted Ayame, reluctant to the last to do anyone's bidding but Lady Hideki's.

Sakura frowned. They didn't have time for this! "Opiates have exactly the opposite effect that belladonna has. With any luck, they'll cancel each other out, leaving Ino in a semi-conscious state, and then I can remove both drugs from her system with my healing magic. They won't cure her, but they'll buy me enough time for me to cure her."

"I thought you said you didn't have much experience with healing!"

"I lied," said Sakura bluntly. "Now go!"

"But—but what about my Lady Hideki? What about her?"

Sakura quickly glanced over at Lady Hideki, mentally assessing her condition. She had lost her voice and had dilated pupils, but that was it—except for the fact that she was in hysterics. Honestly, there's no need to panic so, Sakura thought to herself testily.

"She had much fewer berries than Ino, thus a much smaller dose. Only two, I think. She has between eighteen to twenty-fours to be cured. By that time, Ino will either be dead or on her way to healing, and then I can focus on the Lady Hideki. Quite frankly, Ayame, Ino is the most in danger at the moment. Now will you go get the damn doctor?" Sakura let some of her urgency leech into her voice at the end.

Ayame, seemingly satisfied, nodded, taking off from the room at a run.

Sakura reached for the bowl of "blueberries" on the table, glaring at them before dumping them out of the plate. She then turned back to Ino, carefully laying her out across the floor and placing the bowl next to her. Fitting, really, that the bowl which had nearly killed her would be used to save her.

First, she used some of her magic to "stick" Ino to the floor, a handy method Granny Tsunade had taught her for restraining patients when no one else was available. Closing her eyes, she sought out her magical core, the tightly controlled ball of pastel, light, comforting green from which her magic came. Her hands glowed green and she placed them on Ino's stomach. With her magic, she delved into Ino's body, into the cells and blood and tissue and veins. For that short moment, she became Ino; she felt Ino's confusion, she saw Ino's hallucinations in her mind's eye. With her magic, she slowly drained the poison from Ino's body and into the bowl even as it wreaked havoc inside Ino's organs.

Dimly, she was aware of Ayame arriving with the doctor, and the doctor carefully injecting a dose of morphine into Ino's arm. She recalled the doctor used some of his manmade medicine on Lady Hideki, remembered with annoyance the other noble's terrified, melodramatic sobs. She was aware of Ino's convulsions, of pulling her back again and again from that brink of eternal silence—the silence of belladonna. Once, she recalled opening her eyes, seeing Ino's jaw locked in a soundless scream, but that memory was like the quality of a dream to her—Sakura was unsure if it was even real.

Her hands were shaking when she was finished. There was still some belladonna in Ino's body, but it was in trace enough amounts that Ino could fight it off with relatively little trouble. Exhausted, swaying on her feet, Sakura ended her healing magic and returned to the world.

The doctor was sitting on a chair, watching her impassively. Ayame was with Lady Hideki, comforting the sobbing mess. Lady Hideki, for all her beauty, was truly hideous when she cried.

Sakura noticed that the doctor was a very elderly man, with white hair and wrinkles and age spots. She stretched and then informed the doctor, "Ino should be fine now, I believe. She'll have some discomfort and mild hallucinations, but she'll be able to fight off the belladonna remaining in her system."

"There was also strychnine in the tea," informed the doctor. "It was ground up and disguised as sugar. The Lady Hideki is lucky she only had a sip of the tea, or else she would be dead by now."

Sakura's eyes widened. "Strychnine and belladonna? Someone… someone really wanted to get rid of Ino. Or Lady Hideki. Or both?"

The doctor nodded. "It seems that way, doesn't it?" He sighed, and for a moment he looked just as old as his years, exhausted and too tired for life. Then he smiled and was throbbing with vitality again. "I must say, young lady, that was… that was very impressive healing magic. I would have been forced to leave the lady for dead."

Sakura smiled distantly. "I have—had a good teacher."

He arched an eyebrow. "You are a credit to your mentor. How, perchance, did you know about the man-made treatment for belladonna? The handmaiden here told me it was your idea."

"My mentor stressed the importance of a scientific as well as magical background," sighed Sakura.

"She must have been a most extraordinary mentor," commented the doctor.

"Yes, she was—wait—how did you know my teacher was female?"

He smiled. "There was only one healer who ever learned that method, young lady. Either way, I am Dr. Hiku. Pleasure to meet you."

"Sakura. Pleasure to meet you as well," swallowed Sakura nervously. "I trust—you can—keep this a secret from others? I don't quite want everyone in the castle to know about… this."

"Of course," he told her. "Other people's secrets are not mine to tell. Come, let me help you with the lady down there. I am sure Ayame can assist the Lady Hideki back to her rooms."

Needless to say, they did not finish breakfast that day.

Thank you for all the reviews, guys! I hope this chapter lived up to your expectations!

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Belladonna berries really do look a lot like blueberries. In fact, during my research, I found that there was actually a woman in 2004 who almost died because she mistook some belladonna berries for blueberries. And belladonna berries are very sweet too-- which is why they're such a hazard especially for children, because they taste some of the wild belladonna berries and think Yay yummy! And then they die. ): Just six to ten belladonna berries can be a lethal dose for adults (three to five berries being a lethal dose for children/old people/sick people), and one belladonna leaf is enough to kill an elephant. Oh! And the treatment for belladonna is real too. Doctors basically pump you full of opiates (drugs) and wait for your system to flush it out. But of course Sakura used her magic to help along with that flushing. ;D

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AND. Strychnine is very easy to get your hands on. Just go to an antique store and ask for some "fly paper", which is what they used in the old days to kill flies before strychnine became restricted by the US government. Strychnine, once ground up, looks a lot like sugar. In fact, several people throughout history have been murdered when someone switched out their sugar with ground-up strychnine. Strychnine itself tastes quite bitter (bitter enough to literally make people throw up with just one taste), but once ground up and dissolved into a sweet beverage (like tea ;D), it's nearly undetectable and odorless. (At high temperatures, strychnine gives off a slight garlic scent, but that's it.) 15 to 30 milligrams is the lethal dose. So. You know, if you ever feel like killing anyone with strychnine, there you go! xD Strychnine basically causes convulsions, horrible stomach cramps, and other yummy stuff like that, and the worst thing is that during the whole time the victim is totally conscious. You have to really hate someone to use strychnine. The victim usually dies somewhere between the third to fifth set of convulsions. Basically the only treatment is to get them to a hospital as quickly as possible and have the doctors pump them full of enough muscle relaxants to kill a horse. That stops the seizures, and once the seizures are stopped, the victim can usually excrete the rest of the poison out within the first 24 hours.

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I asked my dad, who's a doctor, for advice regarding the best way to kill someone with poison within a few hours. He gave me kind of a strange look, but said he would prefer cyanide, because it's easy to get your hands on, it causes the person extreme pain, and there isn't any time to get the person to a hospital to treat them. Remind me to never get on Daddy's bad side. D: Oh, but he also likes strychnine. That would be his second choice, he told me.

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But in the end, I decided not to use cyanide because, really, Sakura needs to have enough time to heal Ino, of course. :D It was a toss-up between belladonna and strychnine, and I couldn't decide, so I just included both. xD

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Interestingly enough, here's the profile for a typical poisoner: Caucasian; male; average to above average intelligence; underachiever; inadequate personality; non-athletic; cowardly; neat and orderly; meticulous; loner; careful planner; and non confrontational (either physically or psychologically). So, uh, if you know anyone like that… don't accept a drink from them. Seriously. :P

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OH! BEFORE I FORGET! You know how there was that one episode where Kankuro got poisoned by Sasori and Sakura saved him using the same method in this chapter? The poison was a heavy metal, right? WELL, THAT'S TOTAL BS. Heavy metals are poisonous, of course, but in order to poison someone with them, they need to be exposed to consistently high levels of that heavy metal for weeks, if not months. So yeah. That's why I didn't use heavy metal poisoning in this chapter. Because it's scientifically inaccurate. xD Oh, but Daddy adds that if you ever want to make anyone look like they died of a long, undiagnosed illness (heavy metal poisoning is difficult to detect unless you know exactly what poison you're looking for, says Daddy, and most doctors don't) and you want to draw out the victim's suffering, heavy metal poisoning (especially thallium or cadmium poisoning) is totally the way to go.

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Daddy really worries me. It's like he's given this a lot of thought. xD

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Anyways, that's right, you get to learn random toxicology lessons by reading this story! So if your parents get mad at you for spending so much time on FFnet, tell them you're learning about how to kill people and see the look on their faces. ;D Anyways, though, I think my dad's a bit worried that I'm planning something now, though… and if the police come knocking at my door demanding to know why I was searching up ways to kill people with poison, I'll just point them in your direction, mmkay reviewers? XD

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Review! Thank you so much for getting me to over 300 reviews! And also a shout-out to .YUI.22 who was my 300th reviewer! xD

Do your part for the golden cycle. ;D

ps, sorry for any typos/continuity erros-- i typed this up in like two hours and didn't proofread... at all XD

published 1.31.10

EDIT: SHIT. I MIXED UP KABUTO AND KANKURO. well, you can't blame me, i put this up at like two in the morning, so there. xD

EDIT2: fixed some errors. thank you tigers-and-dragons for pointing out my stupid colloquialism errors. xD

also, to those who asked for my dad's contact info in the more recent reviews... i think you'll understand if i refuse. for the good of the future of the human race and all. XD i shudder to think what daddy can accomplish with one of you guys on his side. :P

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