This…this is the result of Halls and chocolate. BAD MIX. BAAAD MIX.

And Thanks to 3Mindy3...or was it Mindy3...3Mindy? Aghhhh… Anyways, Thanks because the love pentagon thing was first seen on her profile and it made me go, woah, I'm gonna write a crackfic on this. Or Halls fic, depending how you look at it.

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls of all ages! I'm Avaric Tenmeadows, and it is a beau-ti-ful day!"

"Avaric, lad, cut that out. If I wanted an annoying announcer, I would have gotten Howard Cosell himself, instead of you. Mkay?" interjected the Wizard.

"Hmpf, stupid Wizard, doesn't recognize talent…alright then. Let's get started!"

*Spot light focuses on the right corner*

"In this corner, weighing at 130 pounds-"

"Excuse me?" came an indignant cry.

Aravic ignored it.

"- a lean, mean, green, fightin' machine… Elphabaaaaaa Thropp!"

*Canned Applause*

"And in this corner, weighing at 180 pounds-"

"All muscle baby!" said a smug voice.

"The beast from the east, I mean west…the prince from the west… Fiiiiiiiiyeroooooooo Tiiiiiguuuulaaaaaaaar!"

"Boooo! Boooo!" jeered the munchkin sitting on the sidelines.

"Avaric! How did you set this up? They can't fight against each other!" Frowned the Wizard.

"Well, they're bound to fight each other eventually right?" said Avaric thoughtfully.

"No, boy! I foresee two outcomes, one, Fiyero lets Elphaba win so she can go on to win the entire competition, or two, Elphaba let's Fiyero win so he can go on to win the entire thing! They want each other you fool! There is no fight here!"

"Ohh...poop."

Before Avaric could say anything else, Madame Morrible waddled in to the room.

"Wait! Stop, stop everyone, the competition is cancelled!" she huffed.

"Oh thank goodness, I couldn't possibly have hit Elphaba." Said Fiyero.

Elphaba blushed.

"Cancelled? Why?" demanded Oscar.

"Well, Nessa just cut off one of Galinda's ears, so I've decided that this is much too dangerous.

"Is she okay?" asked a worried Boq.

"Oh, she's fine, I just magiked her ear back on. Poof! All better."

"Well, now how are we going to settle this?" grunted Oscar.

"Don't worry, your Ozness, I came up with a back up plan!" said Morrible gleefully.

An hour later all seven of the group sat around a wooden table in a conference room. Galinda had a bandage wrapped around her head even though her ear was perfectly fine.

"Now then, since the wrestling competition would have ended with many dismembered limbs, and broken bones, I propose-"

"Oh no, you don't. This time I'm coming up with the challenge. A wilderness trek!" butted in the Wizard.

"Wilderness trek?" wondered the other six.

"That's right, I'll plop you all in the forest of Oz with a few supplies, where you'll have to survive! Last one standing wins."

"The forest? Without my hairdryer? Dear old Shiz…" Galinda started hyperventilating.

"Wait, how does this work? What do you mean by the last one standing?" asked Fiyero

"I mean, I'll have video cameras set up everywhere, so the Madame and I can always monitor you, if any of you seem to be on the brink of death, we'll come save you and you'll be eliminated from the competition." Explained Oscar.

"Oh, because this is totally safe." Sarcastically mumbled Nessa, "and once again, this isn't fair, I'm in a wheelchair!"

"You get to start with a box of matches, how's that?" bargained the Wizard.

"Fine, whatever."

"And remember, in the forest, anything goes." Added the Wizard coyly.

"Oh boy! This'll be like one great wilderness adventure!" said Boq excitedly.

"Wait, what about me?" asked Avaric.

"Son, you'll be the announcer along with me. We'll get to update the viewers on what's going on, make a few snappy remarks, the works!" said Oscar as he patted Avaric's back.

"Wait, viewers?"

"Of course, Elphaba, we're recording everything remember?"

"So this is just a get rich quick scheme?" accused the green girl.

"No, no, this is a make-everyone-friends-again-and-get-me-a-few-bucks- scheme. All in good fun."

"I get to be on Ozvision?" Squealed Galinda.

"Of course, we all do."

"Hey, I like this idea." Added Fiyero.

"Indeed you do lad, I'm a genius."

"Ugh, I refuse to be apart of this abomination of a reality show." Grumbled Elphaba.

"Well fine then, that means you forfeit and can neither win or be chosen by the victor." Shrugged Oscar.

"Wait what?"

"And I guess that means Fiyero will be choosing Galinda, should he win. I mean, I doubt he'd choose Nessa, no offence dear, and Boq…well, Fiyero doesn't strike me as that kind of person."

"You blackmailing S.O.B." said Elphaba through gritted teeth.

"Yeah…that's me." Said the Wizard with a triumphant grin on his face.

"Fine, I'm in."

Pretty boring. XD, Promise it'll get better =]