Thanks for all the reviews =], and I'm just wondering, did anyone catch my running gag of random Wicked song names from the previous chapters? Yes? Good for you! No? o_o, guess they blended in the paragraph pretty well then. XD
"Welcome back to day five on Wilderness Adventures! I'm your host, Oscar "The Wizard" Diggs!"
"And I'm Avaric "Cart Man" Tenmedows! Last time on Wilderness Adventures, Nessa "Tragically Beautiful" Thropp failed to defy gravity after getting rammed by a mad cow right off a cliff."
"Son, I believe it was a bull." Corrected the Wizard.
"Bulls, cows, they all taste the same to me, and it seems as if no one mourns the wicked, so said Galinda to Nessa, as she simply walked away from the scene of the crime."
"In the direction of a certain green girl…" Added the Wizard.
"Oh yes, Elphaba "Green Bean" Thropp, seems to have everything under control in her at her little camp. She had just about everything set up in one short day! She's incredible…" Said Avaric dreamily.
"Avaric? Stay with me lad. You can't go adding to the love pentagon! Or is a hexagon now? Curse thee foul geometry, thou hast bested me for the last time!" Boomed the Wizard.
"No, no of course not." Sputtered Avaric, "I'm not that guy." He said sheepishly.
The Wizard sighed.
"Finishing up on the update, Fiyero "Pretty Boy" Tiggular, had been rendered unconscious by fluffy woodland creatures...pretty pathetic eh, Oscar?" snickered Avaric.
"Indeedily my boy. Now, let's get this show on the road!"
*Cameras focus in on Fiyero*
"I am so HUNG-Y." Yelled Fiyero has he looked up to the sky.
"Hung-y? Does he mean hungry?" Questioned the Wizard.
"Probably, but he doesn't seem very coherent right now." Answered Avaric.
"Oh, I know the feeling."
Fiyero woke up several hours in a daze after the ambush of furry animals, he decided if the couldn't catch any game, he'd simply eat some grass, maybe find some berries later, and if worse comes to worse, he'd start eating himself. Fiyero was clearly delusional, it'd had been about two days since he saw water.
"Woaahh, trippy." Mumbled Fiyero as he munched on some grass.
The morning dew on the grass was somewhat clearing his fuzzy, water deprived brain; Fiyero came to his senses just enough to realize that he was next to a strawberry bush.
"Food! Glorious food!" Fiyero was nearly crying as he started shoving the berries in his mouth, fistfuls at a time.
"Ahahahahaha! Let's pause this!" Said Avaric.
*Screenshot of Fiyero cramming strawberries into his mouth*
"Time to edit!" Continued Avaric with a mischievous grin.
*Words "Onomnomnomnomnom" written on the screenshot*
"Focus lad." Reprimanded the Wizard.
Fiyero lay on the grass, stomach full of strawberries, and face covered in berry juice. He was about ready to doze off when he suddenly heard some rustling behind him.
"Whose there?" He shouted.
"Hey Avaric, press that button for me, Mkay?" Beckoned the Wizard.
Avaric pressed the glowing blue button.
Suddenly, a large man in a safari suit, holding a large gun came running out of the woods behind the prince. He must have been at least 6'6, weighed at least 200 pounds, with insane green eyes focused on the Winkie.
"…Strawberry?" Offered Fiyero nervously.
In response, the man cocked his gun.
Fiyero took off sprinting, faster than he ever ran before.
"Wuh ohh, he's going to get a cramp after eating all those berries, isn't he, Oscar?" Said Avaric in a teasing tone.
Fiyero was wheezing and panting within a few minutes; he didn't dare stop, or even look behind him. The prince jumped over rocks, ducked at low hanging branches, at one point swam across a shallow stream.
"Kid's got some moves, guess all that dancing through life finally paid off." Scoffed Avaric.
The man in the safari suit was behind running effortlessly behind Fiyero.
"Cue March of the Witch Hunters music. That could be this guy's theme song!" Said an amused Wizard.
"Oh Oz, I *gasp* *wheeze* I'm…*cough* dead!" breathed Fiyero.
After a good ten minutes of continuous running, Fiyero finally looked behind him.
Where'd he go? Wondered Fiyero.
The Winkie didn't have time to think, all of the sudden, his face collided with a something solid and he fell forward.
"Hey! Watch where you're going!" Screamed the person he was on top of.
"Galinda?"
"Wha- Fiyero? What are you doing here?" Asked a confused blonde.
"Galinda, we gotta go! There's some crazy whack job with a big gun, and he doesn't like me very much!" Panted Fiyero.
"There's no one here, Fiyero, are you sure you're ok?" Said Galinda, in a concerned tone.
"Uh…well, it has been a while since I had some water, and food. I'm hungry." Mumbled Fiyero.
"Well, come with me then, I'll fix you up!" Said the bubbly girl.
"What's this? An alliance between Galinda "Confusified Blonde" Upland, and Fiyero "Pretty Boy" Tiggular? How will this play out for Elphaba? Find out next time, on Wilderness Adventures! This has been Oscar "The Wizard" Diggs."
"And Avaric "Cart Man" Tenmedows! Peace out y'all!"