A/N: Sorry it took me a little bit longer to post than usual, but my last year of high school started yesterday and things got a little bit hectic for me. But here's the next chapter, and Reid's out of the hospital!

And if you guys get the time, please check out the second story in my Reid/Morgan SLASH series, titled A Secret Love. While the first one was a oneshot, this one will have multiple chapters!

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds.

It was three days later when Reid finally got out of the hospital. He had refused crutches, saying he didn't need them. JJ, who had taken the rest of the week off, came to pick him up. She had insisted that she take Reid out of the hospital in a wheelchair. He had tried to refuse, but secretly he like the attention she was giving him and hadn't put up much resistance.

"The team still out of town?" Reid asked as he climbed unassisted into the front seat.

JJ nodded, smiling. "They have a case," she said. "In Cleveland."

Reid seemed to be lost in thought. "You should be there," he said finally. "I should be there."

"Spence. Hey," JJ said, putting a hand on his. "You can't go back to work yet, you know that. And I shouldn't be there. Not when you need me." Reid sighed. "You miss it. I know. But you can't go back until you're well again. Hotch won't let you. I won't let you."

Reid sighed again and lent his head against the car window as JJ began driving. He really missed the job, JJ could tell. As soon as his mandatory medical leave was over, JJ knew that he would be back in the office. "You do know what that means, right?" Reid looked over at JJ. "You get to spend time with me, where we won't have to hide."

Reid turned away from JJ and didn't speak, but she could see a small smile now on his face. "That is true." As if he realised something, Reid looked around. "Where are we going? This isn't the way to my house."

"No," said JJ. "But it's the way to mine." Reid looked at JJ in confusion and slight annoyance. "You can't stay at your own place," JJ explained. "You live in an apartment, up a massive flight of stairs. You can't climb those. And this is easier."

"I guess so." Despite the fact that Reid was happy he'd get to spend so much time with JJ, he hated being babied like this. Also, he'd never be left alone. He needed time to be alone.

"We're here," said JJ suddenly, snapping Reid out of his thoughts. He climbed out of the car and just stared at the house. It was a single-storey, cream coloured cottage with colourful flowers spilling out of every patch of dirt.

"This is your house?" Reid gasped, still staring at it.

JJ moved to stand beside Reid, looking a little confused. "You don't like it?"

Reid shook his head. "That's not it."

"Then what is it?"

"It's just… it's exactly like I imagined your house would look. It reminds me of you," Reid explained. "It's like it's your personality, but in house form."

JJ just had to laugh at Reid's strange analogy. "I never thought of it that way," she admitted. "It's a strange description. But I do have to admit, you're right on this one."

"Of course I'm right," Reid chuckled. "I'm a genius, remember?"

JJ laughed again, even louder than before. "Well let's go inside, then."

JJ pulled out her house keys and led Reid to the front door. When she slid her key into the lock, she turned to look at him. The young agent looked deep in thought- which was usual for him- but he also looked troubled. Reid soon noticed JJ watching him. "What?" he snapped.

JJ was shocked. "I can't look at you if I want to?" she said.

Reid's expression quickly changed to one of horror. "JJ, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it, really, I-"

JJ brushed it off with a wave of her hand. "Spence, it's okay, really," she said. "After what you went through… it's okay for you to snap sometimes."

"Are you sure?" said Reid.

JJ gave him a soft smile. "Yes. I'm sure." She turned the key in the lock and pushed the door open. "Welcome home."

JJ dropped her keys into the bowl beside her door as Reid walked into the house, staring around. "You like it?" JJ said.

Reid nodded. "I do. It's different to my apartment, that's for sure."

"How so?"

Reid bent down to examine JJ's DVD collection. "You have a lot more furniture than I do."

JJ had to laugh at that; it was typical Reid. "I'm sure you have a lot more books and DVDs than I do," she replied, as Reid moved onto the bookshelf.

"I probably do," Reid said absently, bending in closer to one of the books.

"The spare bedroom's all set up for you, Spence," JJ said. "In the hall, first one on the left. Your belongings are all in there too. I'm going to go get some food and stuff, are you going to be okay by yourself?"

"Of course I will," Reid replied, bending down to examine the lower shelves of books. "Why wouldn't I be?"

It was just a throwaway comment, but something in it troubled JJ. "I shouldn't be too long." She took a quick look at Reid, but he was still deeply absorbed in examining her bookshelf. Shaking her head, JJ picked up her keys again and left the house.

Reid sighed as JJ left and straightened up. He hated, hated, having to hide this from JJ, but he couldn't tell her. He just couldn't. The knowledge would hurt her; make her wonder what was so wrong with her that he had to turn to this. He picked up his phone and pressed speed dial.

"Boy wonder? Is this really you?" said the voice on the other end.

"Hey, Garcia," said Reid. "I need you to look something up for me."

"Why do you need my awesome abilities for, Reid?" Garcia asked. "You're at JJ's, not on a case."

"I know," said Reid. "This is… this is personal."

"I see…" Garcia was confused. Reid had never asked her something like this. "What do you need, then?"

"I need you to tell me which cemetery Richard Connors' mother is buried in," Reid said.

Garcia was shocked. "Richard Connors? That sleazy slime bag who tortured you? Why do you want to know that?"

"He tortured me because of his mother, Garcia. I just… I feel like I need to know this. I feel like it holds answers for me," said Reid.

"Of course, Reid," said Garcia. He could hear her typing furiously. "Mrs Connors is buried at Wyborn Cemetery."

"Thanks," said Reid. "Oh, and Garcia? Can you not tell the others? Despite the moratorium on intra-team profiling, I think that's would they would do with this information. I am going to tell JJ, though."

"My lips are sealed," said Garcia. "We miss you around here, boy."

"I miss it there too, Garcia," Reid admitted. "As soon as the doctor clears me, I'll be back."

"I wouldn't doubt that," said Garcia, and she hung up.

As soon as he finished talking, Reid breathed out a breath he hadn't realised he was holding. Soon, he would be okay. Soon.

He knew he had to tell JJ that he wanted to visit the grave. He couldn't get to the grave himself, and he couldn't get somebody else to go for him- it would be way too risky. There was an element of risk in this, too, but it was the only option he had.

It wasn't long before JJ returned home, laden with shopping bags. She refused Reid's offer to help, waving him over to the couch.

"JJ…" JJ turned away from her fridge and turned to look at Reid. He looked nervous.

"Spence? What is it?"

"I… I want to visit Mrs Connors' grave," he said.

JJ was stunned. That was not what she was expecting. "Why?"

"I can't really explain it, JJ. I just feel like I need to go there."

JJ examined Reid. This was so out of character for him, this panic and worry, that she felt bad by saying no. "Of course, Spence," she said. "I guess I forgot how hard this must be for you." She stepped closer to him. "You know I'm here for you, right?"

Reid nodded. "Yeah, I do." JJ stepped forward again and hugged him. He felt her natural warmth radiating from her body, which instantly made him feel better. He wished that this were all he needed to get through this, just JJ and nothing else. But it wasn't.

"We can go now, if you want," JJ said as she leant her head against Reid's chest. She loved just standing here with him, just Spencer and JJ. No one else.

Reid rested his head on JJ's shoulder, breathing in the smell of her hair. "Just a few more minutes," he said. For the first time in his life, he was holding the woman he loved. He needed just a few more minutes of this, before he went to get them.

An hour later, Reid was alone in JJ's spare room. They had visited the grave, and Reid had told JJ he needed a moment alone. When she had walked back to her car, Reid had bent down and found the alcove where they were hidden. He had been right about where to look.

And now, back in JJ's room, Reid was finally able to do this. He was ready. It was filled up, lying beside him on the bed. JJ was in the kitchen, cleaning up their dishes before she headed for the bathroom to have her shower. She wouldn't be coming into the room to interrupt him and catch him in the act.

After a moment's hesitation, Reid picked it up and held it up to his arm. He needed this. It was the only thing that could help him through. And with that, Reid plunged the syringe into his arm, and the Dilaudid began to fill his system.

A/N: OMG Reid, no! Why must you do this? I don't know how long it's going to take me to post the next chapter, because I have a VERY busy weekend and more school on Monday... but I'll try and post as soon as possible. As always, please, please, please review! You know how much I love it!