Note from the Author: So yeah – the latest arc in the Naruto super fun times. We all know Kankurou's all worried about Gaara and whatnot, but why is Temari not getting any screen time? Why don't we ever hear about how Temari's feeling? And yes, she is out-of-character. She's supposed to be.
Strength
She drops her head onto her hand, pressing her eyes to her palm. Her other hand is holding tightly to her brother's, desperately trying to keep contact. She feels so alone in this moment, and nothing has ever been so hopeless, it seems.
The gods are laughing at her.
Her eyelids close thankfully, resting against the darkness of her skin. They have been open and in use for too many long hours now. The dirt on her toes reminds her that she hasn't bathed since she returned home, that she has been in the hospital perpetually for days.
She has to be strong, even now.
There is nothing for it but to wait. She is not allowed to act. She is too emotionally-involved, they tell her. She disagreed vehemently. When has she ever become emotionally-involved?
Her life has become entwined with those of her siblings. She is their mother as much as their sister and she cannot bear to think of losing these boys she reared. One of them fails beside her, she can feel his heart beating more slowly through the grip of his fingers. The other she fears is already lost. He is far away, beyond her sight, beyond her care, and she cannot save him because she is too emotionally-involved.
She has grown accustomed to not being alone, she realizes. She has become dependent upon one boy's playful bullying, the other's cool affection. She has become used to them being nearby for her to protect and, suddenly, it seems like they will never be here again.
Her fingers are wet, and she lifts her face, shocked to realize that she is crying. Never have tears left her eyes, and now her mouth twists in a sob, and she falls forward against the sheet of the hospital bed, her shoulders racking. Suddenly, a numbing emptiness is trailing through her blood. It seems to consume her.
She is not strong enough.
"I don't want to be alone." Even her voice shakes now. She is trembling with fear and shame, and it fills the emptiness that she has never felt before. It feels like warmth and color and weakness and she feels real and alive and utterly not strong as she weeps. "I don't want to be alone."
"You're not alone, Temari."
Her head whips up, and she doesn't think to be ashamed as her tears splatter across his skin. He is smiling at her. She can't bring her jaw to stop quivering. Her knees wobble as she stands, and she wonders if she meant to fall upon him in an embrace or if her legs have just given out. "I thought I lost you too, Kankurou." Her relief pours from her lips as she kisses his forehead, his nose, as she had when they were young.
"We haven't lost him yet, Temari." His face is clear, a canvas with no paint for the first time in years. His voice is barely a whisper. "Don't give up on him."
She presses her face to his bare shoulder. "If I give up on you two, I give up on me."