Michael's Return

Michael stared at the Welcome to Roswell sign. Dawn was approaching, he could see the first specks of daylight appearing from behind the dusty red rocks, like golden jewels shining in the night sky.

Jeez, what the fuck am I doing here? He thought to himself. His panicked, homesick feeling had gone as suddenly as it had arrived, now he just felt stupid and queasy. You've lost it man, you really have. Why come back now after all this time? What good is it going to do? You're just going to screw up the happiness they've got now. That's what you are after-all, a screw-up right? Do you think they'll be happy seeing you? You did what you were good at, you ran away. What about Maria? Do you think she'll be happy? She's probably gotten settled now, got a normal boyfriend, a happy life, do you really want to ruin that for her? Though of course you had to call her... you're so fucking stupid! He normally gave himself great pop talks like these, boost the morale and all that shit. Periodically that voice switches from his own to Hanks, it puts him down, tell him how worthless he is...sometimes you see, he would forget, so Hank would always remind him.

Enough of that pitying shit. Get to work, he told himself and with a sigh he dropped down to the floor next to the sign and sat down. Should he turn back? A few more steps and he would be in Roswell for sure. You've come this far, it's too late to turn back now. He looked out into the vast desert beside him, that place was more home than anywhere else really. The hours he used to spend there, hiding from Hank's fists, hiding from questioning teachers, searching for his true home, practising his powers, learning how to be strong so he could protect his family. So he could protect Maria. Maria. Her voice echoed in his head...she had said his name. Michael glanced back at the direction he had come from, he was right, he had come too far now to turn back. With a steely gaze and a clenched jaw, he hopped back inside his brick red Chevelle and drove into his home: Roswell, New Mexico.

However, as always, there was one slight problem...he didn't know where he was going to go at 3am in Roswell. Isabel...Max...they had probably moved out of their house now, got a place of their own, he couldn't just turn up at the Evans's, climb through the bedroom window and everything would be fan-fucking-tastic. No. Things will have changed. Michael drove around randomly for a while before finding himself outside of the DeLuca residence. All of the lights were out except for a soft, glowing, blue light coming from inside Maria's room. He smirked. Maria had always been afraid of being completely in the dark when she slept. Why hadn't she left home? Wasn't she always wanting to leave Roswell, to sing, to become a star? He really believed she would have made it, her name in lights and everything.

Michael got out of the car and stood outside of her window, the air was fairly cool and he felt like he could just stand there all night. Instead, he quickly climbed up and and peered through the window, she was sleeping, she looked just as beautiful as she used to, more even. Though now as he stared harder, he could see faint worry lines on her face, which had never been there before...had he caused these too? Like the ones with Max? Just as he was staring at her, drinking her image in, her eyes snapped open and pierced right through him.

He had forgotten the magnitude of her eyes, giant emerald burning spheres that shimmered and held more strength and vulnerability than he had ever seen in anyone else. Her eyes bore into his and suddenly he didn't feel so steady. Get a grip Michael! Be a stonewall. A stonewall. Nothing can get in. Michael took a deep breath and squashed all of his fluttering feelings to that other place. He often felt like inside of him there were two places, an icy empty box in mid air and a swirling pit beneath it. Whenever he felt himself...well...feeling too much, he would push it all into that pit of emotions swirling around and then he would just stay in the box, removed from his feelings, completely neutral. He tried to squash these intense feelings that were threatening to overwhelm him, but they wouldn't go away, they just stayed. The longer they stayed the more it felt like stabs of ice and afire into his heart. How did she have such an immense effect on him?

Maria's eyes smiled slightly and then she sat up. She knew he was coming back, after the phone call she knew it would be that night. She heard his car pulling up near her house, and she heard him climb up to her window. Quickly she glanced at him before motioning for him to stay there, there was no way he could come into the house without waking her mother up, besides, she wanted time alone with him so they could talk. It had been such a long time.

Maria shut her curtains and quickly pulled on a pair of jeans, a strap top and a jacket along with her sneakers, taking a quick look in the mirror she smoothed down her hair which had grown considerably since he had left and set off as softly as she could down the stairs into the kitchen. Suddenly it hit her, Michael's outside...Michael's outside...Michael is outside my house, he's by his car, Michael is waiting for me outside of my house. Oh my god. Oh my god. He's back. Michael is back and he's outside. 8 years she had been waiting for this, 8 long years and now he was back. She felt so nervous she thought she might throw up, taking two long breaths she steadied herself on the kitchen table before smoothing her hair down again with shaking hands and leaving out the back door with it on latch.

Michael was there as she expected, leaning against the hood of his car. He still looked so gorgeous. She could hear her heart pounding in her ears, as loud as drums they were. So many questions around in her mind, how long had she dreamed of seeing him again? How long had she planned on his return, what she would do, what she would say...now standing there, a few feet away from him, she froze. The words she had wanted to say for so long just dissolved under his intense stare. Trembling, she moved towards him, scared to death of what will happen next.

"Hi." Michael said huskily, he found it hard to speak when he was around her. She looked incredible.

"Hi." Maria breathed back, unsure of what to say, there was so much yet none of it would come out. His eyes however spoke volumes.

"We should talk. Do you want to go for a ride?" Michael asked. He didn't want to say there, he wanted privacy, somewhere nice and open...like the desert.

"Okay." Maria said. At least being in a car with him would be a bit more familiar, it was in a car that they first properly spoke. Hugging herself tightly, she allowed Michael to open the door for her before he went around and sat in the driver's seat. Then, with a little bit of noise, Michael revved up and sped down the road.

tbc...