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The funeral would be held two weeks from today, on a Sunday; I was the one appointed to take care of their belongings, the house, and the funeral arrangements. They left everything to me, since they had no one else besides me. It'd be a conjoined service for both Bullfrog and CeCe.

It was sad, like my life right now. Once Alli caught wind of what happened, she rushed to my house and comforted me. Or tried to. Since Monday, I've been like a zombie. Not that I could help it, in all honesty, I became like CeCe. My will, my life, my spark…it was gone.

After everything that's happened, it's a wonder I'm still going to the school for work. But I promised Wesley. Although the Principal suggested I take time off, since he heard about what happened, I still refused. I couldn't let this get to me, not again. Death would not take over my life again, I couldn't let it.

But my behavior, just the way I was, that bubbly happy girl, was gone. I lost everyone I cared about; my parents abandoned me, as did Darcy. Eli died, Bullfrog passed away, and CeCe killed herself. I was alone, more so than I was before.

The students seemed to notice my lack of attentiveness and my attitude. Some gave me cards, signed by the class, for my loss. But I just left them in the desk drawer at school.

Along with my lackluster attitude, I became impatient with everyone. Students thought twice before crossing me, as had the other teachers in this school, their requesting to talk or anything in the teacher's longue stopped. And Alli, she tried her best to get me to open up but I refused.

Then there was K.C., who interrogated Alli until she told him why I haven't talked to him and canceled our date. Almost immediately, he rushed to my house to talk. But I also refused him. I rather just keep to myself now, my feelings were too much of a burden, I wasn't going to pay them mind anymore.

Once I made up my mind with that, which was the night that CeCe killed herself, everything became dull and I lost interest. I graded papers moderately, not really reading them, just seeing if the students did it. I would eat take-out and watched reruns of old shows, spending my nights alone and going through the day like a mindless zombie.

But today, just three days from the funeral, things got progressively worse. K.C. hadn't given up on talking to me, he would text me, call me, even show up at my house unannounced. It was slowly starting to get annoying.

But today, he took it to the next level. I was in English III, blandly grading papers while the students were either reading or working on their next assignment. And there was a knock on the door, Principal Shep opened it and casually peeked his head in.

"Ms. Edwards?" He asked, I snapped my head up and narrowed my eyes.

"Yes?" I replied coolly.

"There's someone who would like to see you." He stated, "I'll watch the class while you talk."

In annoyance, I dropped my pen harshly and stood up, brushing my skirt down and briskly walking towards the door.

I turned my head slightly, glancing at the curious students. "Behave or I'll require you all to write another two thousand word essay on behavior. Got it?"

"Yes, ma'am." Was the class' reply.

I stepped out into the hallway to be greeted by none other than K.C. Guthrie. I narrowed my eyes further and prevented myself from snapping.

"What are you doing here?" I hissed, folding my arms in front of me.

"We need to talk; you need to talk. Alli says that ever since Cecelia pass-"

"It's CeCe!"

"Sorry, sorry. Ever since CeCe died, you've been pushing everyone away. You need to talk to someone, whatever you're bottling up needs to be let it out. It's not healthy to keep it in. And if we have to intervene, then we will."

"Just get out of here before I get security. You don't know what you're talking about."

"I do. I know what it's like to lose someone special, someone important. Jenna gave our baby up, granted it was for the best, but it was my own daughter. My own flesh and blood. I know what it' li-"

"No!" I yelled, "You don't. She's still alive, she's still breathing. You know that. But…Eli. He's dead, his heart isn't beating anymore. Neither is Bullfrog's. And CeCe. I lost three people, one of whom I loved more than anything in this world! And another who killed themselves with me right outside the room. Don't act like you know! Because you don't!" I cried, feeling tears starting to form in my eyes, all my emotions running ramped.

"Clare…I…"

"Don't Clare me. Don't bother either. Don't try and pretend you have a clue what I'm feeling right now. Because you don't. You don't know what it's like to have the blood of a loved one on your hands. You can't understand how broken and hurt I feel, or how much it hurts to know that you could've done something to prevent it. Just…don't!"

In the middle of my rant, K.C. had walked towards me, trying to calm me down. But I frantically beat at his chest, yet him being the pro-athlete; he caught my wrists until I broke down and gave up.

"Shh. Shh. It's alright. I've got you, I'm not going anywhere." He whispered as I wrapped my arms around him tightly.

I felt everything I had been bottling in release as I cried, and K.C.'s strong arms held me close, making me safe and secure. I spent a good while, just clutching onto him, crying until my throat went dry and my eyes hurt. All the while, K.C. rocked me and whispered sweet words to me.

Finally, when everything was let out, I loosened my arms and pulled away. Slowly, waiting for my sniffling to stop, I looked up at K.C. and felt my heart squeeze painfully.

Realization had dawned on me, when our eyes met, it finally hit me. Eli was dead, and he would never be coming back. And I'll never find another man like him, ever, not in a thousand different lives. K.C. will never be him, but he is someone I can count on.

Which is why, when the realization hit me, so did our mouths. They met and I never felt more alive in that moment since I last kissed Eli.

He would never be the man who had my heart, but he would do. As wrong as that sounds. But it's the truth. I will never love him like I loved Eli, but I could try. And I will.

Sunday came too quickly for me; I wasn't ready to face the deceased bodies of Cecelia Rosalie and Travis Markus Goldsworthy. But, on that cold February morning, I dressed in my black dress. I stepped into my black heels, put on my black hat and covered myself in my black shawl.

And I stepped out into the cold weather, seeing K.C. waiting for me, leaning against his silver sports car. I kissed his cheek lightly, my expression probably as emotionless as it could be. He opened the car door for me, and I slid in.

K.C. walked around to the driver's side and got in as well, starting the car. The whole ride was quiet, but he grabbed my hand, kissed my knuckles and kept them intertwined until we reached the church.

I had to get there early, so I could get everything settled and ready for when the service actually started. Both bodies arrived before I got there, the lids were closed, which I was thankful for. I knew that I wouldn't be able to handle it.

Father Greg, who was now almost sixty, was waiting for me, standing near the end of the aisle for me. I smiled faintly at him, a small 'hello' followed and he led me to the table where three pictures stood.

One was CeCe, a gorgeous photograph of her during a summer not too long ago with an engraving of her name on the frame itself. That was on the left side of the table, where a bouquet of yellow roses sat in front. On the right was a picture of a happy Bullfrog with his name engraved in it as well, a bouquet of yellow flowers also sat in front of it.

In the middle was their wedding picture, which had taken place in a cheap church in Ontario. But CeCe looked stunning as ever in a short white dress and Bullfrog was handsome as well in a dull grey suit.

"Have you prepared your speech?" Father Greg asked, placing a gentle hand on my shoulder.

"I did."

"And how many people did you say were coming?"

"Very distant but close relatives from both sides of CeCe and Bullfrog's family. And friends, they had a lot of them…and my parents and another friend of mine."

"Alright, well, unfortunately, I won't be able to perform the ceremonial. My granddaughter is ill and I must take care of her because her parents…well…you know how disappointing people can be. But God shall forgive them. Minister Fitzgerald is going to perform the ceremonial, if that's alright with you?"

Numbly, I nodded, not caring. He nodded and said he'd send a prayer for me. I took K.C.'s hand and looked at him while Father Greg left.

"Thank you." I said, leaning against his arm.

"Anything for you." He said and kissed the top of my head.

"Well, if you could help me with the flowers that need to be put up and lighting the candles, that'd be nice." I gave him a small smile, kissing his cheek again.

"Again, anything for you." He gave me a bright smile, and left me to arrange the flowers around CeCe and Bullfrog's coffins while he left to light the candles.

Tentatively, I lifted both of the lids, looking at each of them. CeCe wore a gorgeous dress that was a deep green, with a black beaded design. The only thing that ruined the beauty of her death, was the gash on the right side of her head. Thankfully, her hair covered most of it. Other than that, she looks like an angel really.

And Bullfrog, he never looked more at peace than now. In death, he even had a faint smirk that rivaled his son's.

"Hey." K.C placed his large hand on my shoulder, somewhat startling me out of my reverie. "Sorry. I just wanted to tell you that people are arriving.

"No. It's alright. Just…you know. Thinking about things."

"Well, let's go greet them," he said and I nodded.

I trailed my hand down the smooth wood of the coffin that Bullfrog laid in, and left to walk with K.C. to the door.

I never thought so many people cared for CeCe and Bullfrog, at the very least, forty people arrived. But its better that so many people had come in honor of them, maybe keep the memory of them alive. Sadly, a few were dressed in very revealing clothes.

Not to be rude, but I think of them as skanky to come to a funeral dressed like a whore. It was rude actually, in my opinion. I tried to hide my distain when I greeted them at the door, even more so when they gave bedroom eyes at K.C..

After I was sure everyone arrived, I went in the back to talk to Minister Fitzgerald. Of course, having been so caught up in my own mind, it never registered whose name Father Greg had said.

"Clare." Fitz said and I felt a shiver go down my spine, I never knew he had become a minister.

"Fitz…" I had never called him back, this seemed somewhat awkward.

"I'm sorry for your loss." He said and I just nodded with a faint 'thank you'.

"So you'll be doing the sermon?" I asked while walking with him to the main part of the church.

"Yes."

"Thank you."

"It's my pleasure." He said and I parted ways with him to sit in the front pews with K.C. and my parents.

I've never cried so much in my life; Fitz had pulled them out of me during his preaching. My mother handed me tissues as I sniffled and slightly sobbed. I wasn't the only one; Alli cried, as did my mother and a good part of the others in the pews.

"Now, Clare Edwards, would you like to speak now?" He asked, and I nodded.

I stood up, grabbing the paper I had written my speech on, and dusted off my dress's skirt. I made my way to the alter, feeling my throat become dry at the thought for everything.

But I cleared it and stood behind it, looking over at the people in the pews, back at the deceased, and down to the paper.

"I…I'd like to thank you, all of you, for coming today. I know that both CeCe and Bullfrog would appreciate it. Right now, they're looking down at us, honored that all of you have come today, to remember them. And that's what you're here for; you may be her to mourn the loss of two very, very brilliant people. But I know they'd rather be cherished and remembered than be mourned over." I said, looking across the crowd of people.

"CeCe, well, I know she wouldn't want you crying, even though you will. If she were here, she'd probably start telling crude jokes just to make you smile. Because that's what she did, she made you smile. And sometimes all it took was one of her own, genuine, smiles to make you smile back. She was always happy and smiling, even through the tough times, the worst times. She always wore a smile."

In the middle of my speech, something caught my eye, I tried to ignore it. But the movement of something covered in black caught my eye again and I stared in the back pews to see someone sitting by themselves.

"Maybe it was Bullfrog that made her smile so much, considering how boisterous and somewhat obnoxious he had been. I remember when CeCe and I had been riding to the store, she turned on the radio and as soon as his voice came on…well you'd never see that woman as happy as when she was with her husband. Or heard him. They were a match made in heaven, and they went there together. To heaven. I think that, when love was as strong as theirs, and one passes, leaving the other alone, CeCe just couldn't take it."

The person in the back was wearing a thick, large black coat and an odd hat. I tried to brush off the eerie feeling that slowly started to form in the pit of my stomach.

"I know how she felt, but my past love wasn't as strong as hers was. It couldn't have. But I know the feeling of losing another. And I hope none of you judge her for doing what she did. Because she experienced one of the hardest things one could. And in memory of her, I'd like you all to smile like she did. Might it be for no reason, or to brighten someone else's day. I know it would make her happy, which is why today, I'm going to smile."

I finished my speech and quickly walked away from the alter to the pews towards K.C. and sat. Both he and my mother grabbed both my hands, and my mother whispered how beautiful it was.

Casually, I looked back, just to see where the dark-clothed man was. But he was gone. The uneasy feeling grew in my stomach and I looked back forward.

K.C. pulled into the cemetery, and I felt my stomach tighten. I never did like them, they always scared me. And also made me sad. As ridiculous as it sounds, just thinking that someone's mother, father, daughter, whoever was dead and their family had to deal with the loss. It was somewhat heartbreaking.

I stepped out of the car, the only other vehicle being two hearses. And, Morty was one of them. I requested it. I really don't think anyone has to ask why.

I wrapped my shawl tighter around me, the wind slightly picking up. K.C. placed his arm around my shoulder to try to warm my chilled body. We proceeded to the burial site; CeCe and Bullfrog would be buried together, sharing the same tombstone.

I looked around; cars were slowly starting to pull in as men set up the caskets to be put in the ground. The thought alone made me feel sadder than I already was. Once the caskets were buried, it would mean they were both really dead. Both really gone.

"K.C.?" I caught his attention by touching his arm.

"Yeah?"

"I'm…gonna go for a walk. To clear my head a little, okay?"

"I'll come with you."

"No. I want to go alone. I'll be back soon, don't worry." I said and kissed him chastely before walking off down the dirt path.

Even though it was a cemetery, I felt at ease. This was what I needed; the crisp air made me alert and cleared my head, no matter how cold it was. And it wasn't as morbid and spooky as I thought it'd be. I don't know why I did, but the first thought that came to mind was creepy and filled with fog – like in monster movies. Which was stupid because in actuality, it was rather nice, even with all the tombstones.

There were a number of trees scattered throughout it, but I could clearly see where everyone was gathering. I looked around, somewhat admiring the grand statues of angels that stood above the dead. I stopped suddenly when a large gust of wind blew at my side, making me stumble into a large statue of Michael. My hat flew off, I chased after it, stumbling quite a bit from my heels not agreeing with the dirt path.

"Damn it," I cursed as I nearly tripped over a particularly large rock.

The wind stopped, as did my hat, which sat now at the base of a large oak tree. It seemed haunting, with its giant branches, bared to the world. I took my time walking to the tree, amazed at the size and the intimidating presence of the tree.

I didn't take my eyes off it as I bent to take my hat, and I stood slowly. When I was about to turn around, a stick snapped and I froze. It was close, like, on the other side of the tree close.

I kept my legs still, but turned my upper body to look back at the tree. "Is anybody there?"

Nothing. No noise, not even the wind, which had stopped abruptly. I repeated myself, still, no answer. So cautiously, I walked around the tree, trying not to make noise.

Eventually, I made it around, and I gasped. Yet again, my body froze, upright and rigid, clutching my hat in my hand.

It…no…It couldn't…it wasn't…

"You're supposed to be dead…"

"I know." For the first time in months, many, many months, I heard his voice.