-Chp. 3(Normal POV)-

Everything was lively in the Order, making things more troublesome than before. There was no peace, no serenity to drift off to sleep in. Word traveled fast on Lavi and Kanda's new relationship, and after having been gone on their mission rumors had spread that were not entirely true.

Kanda was still recovering from his injuries, having slept for over 24 hours already. His body had returned back to its normal shape and figure soon enough, though his eyes never even flickered with movement. Lavi and Lenalee, who kept a close eye on him were begining to worry.

"What if he's not the same when he wakes up?" Lavi had asked Lenalee in slight desperation. He haden't gotten any sleep in over a day and knew he looked terrible. Lenalee was worried for him also, but she knew Kanda was his top priority.

"Why wouldn't he be?" Lenalee asked, looking up to Lavi from her seat on the floor next to Kanda's bed. Lavi always stayed with him, Lenalee coming to bring him food and to keep him company.

"Before... with his feelings... it was because the dart made him more... I don't know, open? I made him show his emotions so much more and he acted the pola opposite of himself. Now that it has worn off... I'm afraid he is going to go back to the old Kanda." Lavi said, pausing to take breaths every so often. Lavi held the young males limp hand in his own, praying that everything would remain.

"Well... what about you yourself Lavi?" Lenalee asked, making Lavi turn a quizical look upon her in the dimly lit room. "You're going to become the next Bookman... and I thought they weren't supposed to really 'feel'." Lenalee said, not realizing she was making the situation far worse than it had even been to begin with.

Casting his eyes downward, Lavi let Kanda's hand slip out of his own and fall onto the soft white sheets. Tears pricked his eye, but he blinked them away before standing hurriedly and walking to the door.

"La-" the door shut before Lenalee could even have Lavi sit back down. She noticed the sudden change in his emotions but still couldn't figure it out. Giving a sigh, she stood and glanced at a sleeping Kanda once more before leaving the room.

-Lavi's POV-

I couldn't take it as I walked outside into the cold air. I couldn't stand the thoughts running through my head right now. I couldn't stand how dangerously close I was to losing everything, in more ways than one.

My chest tightened in a vice grip as my breathing came in shorter bursts, tears flowing down my cheek. Sobs made my body tremble as I leaned back against the building and burried my face in my hands. I let the sorrow run off me, but I knew it would never truly leave.

I couldn't have feelings for Kanda and be a Bookman. It was impossible. I knew by now Panda must have heard... and all I had to do was go back to my room for it to be finalized and for my life to be crushed.

"Yu... I'm so sorry..." I cried to myself, willing for everything to stop. I had choosen to become a Bookman when I was just a child, I didn't know. But now it was to late... there just couldn't be anyway to deny it. "But I'll try..." I mumbled depessedly to myself.

The sun was just begining to set, and I looked up to it after drying my tears away. It was bright orange, glowing. Casting shadows across everything as it swelled before diminishing and casting me in a sea of darkness. I thought of Kanda and hoped one day that Kanda and I would be able to watch it together.

Staggaring to my feet I went back inside, only having a soul purpose. It was either letting Kanda know we couldn't do this anymore, or quit being a bookman and probably get killed. I knew I could never stand the first one, I would sooner kill myself than cause such a great deal of pain on Kanda.

The halls weren't as crowded, many people heading to their own rooms to sleep. My footsteps echoed as I made it to the door, I paused to take a shaky breath before walking in.

Panda stood, smoking on his pipe, waiting for me. His expression was sour. "These rumors I've been hearing about you, they better not be true." he said while releasing a puff of smoke. I couldn't look at him and I cast my eyes downward.

"And if they were?" I asked, cautiously, as I feared my life would be at stake. Silence followed and I dared not to look up, dared not to see the expression on Panda's face.

A fist struck me and I managed to stay upright, falling into the door for support while looking up with an expression of anger. "Bookman do not feel petty emotions such as yourself!" Panda yelled at me, and I couldn't stand it.

"Well I do! I love Kanda, and I know what it is like to feel!" I yelled back with as much anger and intensity. I got a hard glare from the gramps, which I returned ten fold.

"You're a disgrace." Panda spat at me, not advancing any further. The air had turned malicious as we stared each other down.

"Maybe I just wasn't cut out to be the next Bookman." I spat back, knowing that was most likely the case. This was going to be recorded for sure, I just knew it.

"I knew you would never make it, but I expected you to get further and to not be taken down by some emotion like Love." Panda growled back at me. I crumpled on the inside, ready to break down once more, but I kept a stoic face.

"You're like my father, Panda. No matter how much I know I shouldn't, I can't help it. It won't go away. I just need you to understand, please." I sounded pitiful, my anger gone with the wind. Panda's glare lessened a bit. It was almost as bad as telling Komui that Lenalee wanted to sleep with me and every other male in the order.

"As you are like my son, but what when this affairs ends? You understand I won't let you come crawling back to me." he said a twinge of sadness as he turned to face the window. If I wasn't so stressed, I would have noticed the small tears his eyes carried.

"I know, but it will work out. Either way I will still be and exorcist. I will still be Lavi." I said while walking silently over to him and placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Can't you let an old man grieve in peace, idiot. Don't you have a certain male to go visit?" Panda said in a passive voice, not betraying a lot of emotion. I gave a small laugh, knowing he accepted me. There was no going back now.

"Thanks Gramps, but I know things will work out." I said, stopping low enough to wrap him in a small hug. He batted me away and pointed to the door.

"Go on ahead, I still have work to do." he said while leaving me so he could go and sit at his desk, working by the small lamps light. I wiped a few more tears before slipping out the door, on my way to see Kanda.

Nothing was going to be the same again and I knew it. Things just changed for the better though, so things were going to fine. Everything would work out in the end.

-Normal POV-

Lavi stepped into Kanda's room as silent as a mouse, not blowing his cover as he stayed in the shadows.

Kanda lay on the bed, bathed in the soft glow of the moon. He was illuminated against the bed, dark hair contrasting with his pale skin. His eyes were open, he was watching out the window to see the moon and stars.

Turning, his dark blue eyes caught sight of Lavi in the shadows. Showing a small smile he lifted a hand up and reached out. "I missed you... I saw the sunset, it sort of reminded me of you." he spoke softly, his face showing gentleness. No hard lines from glaring or scowling. He had changed, but even if it was only for me, I didn't mind. I smiled, knowing we both saw the same thing and thouht about each other.

"I quit..." Lavi said just as softly, coming over to his side by the bed. Kanda just looked up at him, feeling his hand being held. "I stopped being a Bookman to be with you..." Lavi didn't look at Kanda. He couldn't, it just didn't feel right. His eye was looking down at their hands.

Kanda pulled his hand back and stared up at Lavi, wanting to meet gazes but the red head refused to look at him. Lavi stared at his now empty hand. "Lavi..." Kanda spoke in a whisper, not knowing the emotion he was feeling. He didn't understand when this had come about.

Kanda had changed, he was more open and felt more emotions even now when the dart's poison was long out of his system. It hadn't changed him much, but noticably by the people he was close to.

"I'm sorry... but I need to be with you, Yu-chan. I can't help it. I... love you." Lavi said while looking at the raven with a small smile of sadness, it was all he could do to keep himself together. Kanda watched him with a sullen look before he gave his head a slight shake as if to clear his mind.

"Lavi..." Kanda paused to give a sigh before continuing. "You can be such a baka at times... but, and yes this is me speaking, I can't help but l-lo-love you to..." Kanda stuttuered out the last part, a hazy pink dusting his cheeks. Lavi felt a tear run down his cheek and he place a hand atop Kanda's head where the ears used to be.

"I'm really going to miss the ears... they made you look adorable." Lavi said with a genuine smile. Kanda gave a small glare. "But you back to yourself is even better." Lavi whispered once more, leaning down to embrace Kanda.

Kanda returned it, having to wrap his arms around Lavi's neck in the position he was. They pulled apart a short distance to look at each other.

"No... I'm not back to myself. I'm different now, I feel more than I have and notice a lot more. But, I'll only ever let that side of me show around you." Kanda spoke before placing a small kiss on Lavi's forehead. "Everyone else will still think I'm Kanda, not your Yu-chan."

Lavi pulled Kanda into a passionate kiss at his last sentence. It brought more tears forth, and it made his heart swell with happiness. Breaking away Lavi crawled onto the bed and over Kanda.

"I love you so much and you don't even realize it all, yet." Lavi said while initiating another kiss. Kanda gave a small laugh into the kiss, turning to make Lavi fall next to him so they faced each other.

"You need sleep now, you look like you need it." Kanda said gently, running a hand through Lavi's hair. Lavi smiled lightly, pulling Kanda into him.

"Yeah... I've been worried about you. But now that I know you are safe, I can." Lavi mumbled before shutting his eyes and drifting off. Kanda smiled and snuggled into him more before drifting off along with him.

- Break -

They were woken by a knocking at the door, not loud, but soft. Stirring Lavi sat up and rubbed his eyes, careful not to wake Kanda. The japanese was already awake though, still lying as he blinked the sleep from his eyes.

"Who is it?" Lavi's voice sounded groggy, and he cleared his throat. There was a small shuffling before the door opened and Lenalee's face poked in.

"It's me, how is he?" Lenalee asked, not knowing Kanda had already woken up.

"Awake." Kanda growled, rolling over and placing his head on Lavi's lap before burrying his face into the red head's stomach as Lenalee turned the light on.

"Oh, well that makes me happy. How are you feeling?" she asked with a laugh at Kanda and Lavi's affectionate gestures. How Lavi would stroke the youngers hair, and how Kanda would reach up and hold his hand.

"Hungry..." Kanda spoke before looking up at Lavi with a small smirk. "And a hot shower." Kanda finished, knowing Lavi would get his meaning. Lenalee couldn't catch the hidden meaning, so she just nodded her head.

"Okay, well you get a shower and then get something to eat. You to Lavi, and I'll tell Komui that your 100% fine." Lenalee spoke before taking her leave, the door shutting softly behind her.

Lavi looked down at Kanda, a mischevious look upon his face. "So, about that shower." Lavi said with a slight husk leaning down to catch Kanda's lips in a kiss. "I don't think we're going to get any cleaner." he whispered into Kanda's ear.

Kanda let out a chuckle before standing up, legs a bit wobbly. Lavi hooked an arm around his waste and they smiled at each other, exchanging a quick hug before sneaking off to the showers.

They weren't seen and they immediately took the large, private shower room. It was large enough for three people to stand in comfortably.

Lavi turned on the hot spray of the water, turning to see Kanda with his shirt off. Sneaking upon him, Lavi pinned Kanda to the wall, catching his mouth in a kiss. Kanda tried to protest but was silenced when a tongue greated his own. Burrying his hands into Lavi's hair he deepened the kiss.

"I've been waiting for this." Lavi breathed out when they pulled away, faces mere inches apart.

"So have I." Kanda admitted, the two of them stripping down to nothing. Kanda was the first under the hot spray, muscles releasing all tension.

Lavi stepped in behind him, pulling his back flush against his chest. Kanda pressed into him, feeling the red heads arousal against him. Turning, Kanda pulled Lavi into him, going against the wall. Lavi gripped Kanda's backside, pulling him up so Kanda's legs were wrapped securely around him. They locked lips once more before Lavi trailed down Kanda's neck to leave a dark marking where all could see.

"I'm going to make you scream." Lavi growled next to Kanda's ear, nipping at the sensitive flesh. Kanda bit back a moan, feeling a hand travel lower. He couldn't help but cry out when a finger teased his entrance. It was like every nerve in his body had become overly sensitive to any form of stimulation.

"Lavi... Ah!" Kanda whimpered out when the finger slipped inside of him. Wrapping his arms tighting around the red head, he rolled his hips to tease Lavi's aching erection. Lavi thrust the finger in harder, adding a second. Kanda was helpless as all the sounds escaped him.

"You ready for the real thing?" Lavi asked him, lining up with his entrance either way. Kanda's rationality had gone out the window by now, and he knew it was going to hurt. Nevertheless he nodded his head.

In one thrust Lavi was imbedded into him, hitting his prostate head on. Screaming out, Kanda raked his nails along Lavi's back as the pace was quickened. Lavi kept his thrusts up as he left another mark on Kanda's collar bone.

"R-Rabi..." Kanda's accent was thick, betraying his heritage. Lavi smirked at it and picked up the pace, locking Kanda in a lip bruising kiss.

They couldn't take much more as they neared their end. The coil tightening and tightening. Lavi was spurred on by every little gasp Kanda gave, every little moan. Kanda was lost in the mind shattering lust, not caring how loud he was.

"Yu... I'm close." Lavi whispered to him, feeling Kanda nod. Taking one hand away from supporting Kanda, Lavi used it to pump the youngers swollen erection. That was the end for Kanda as he arched into Lavi, his releasing coating their stomachs and chests.

With Kanda's inner wall tightening, Lavi released and rode out his orgasm with a few more thrusts before pulling out. Leading them to the tiled floor and under the warm water, Lavi hugged Kanda's quivering body.

"I love you." Kanda murmurred without stuttering. Lavi smiled and kissed him on the cheek.

"Love ya too. Now, let's get cleaned up so we can eat." Lavi said while they both stood and washed off. While doing so he noticed something about Kanda, his ears were back atop his head, swiveling. "Yu-chan... your ears are back." Lavi pointed out with a chuckle.

Kanda reached his hands up and felt the not soaked appendages before he growled. Finished washing he stepped out and wrapped himself in a towel, looking in the mirror.

"So what? This happens everytime I have sex." Kanda said, ignoring Lavi's bark of laughter. He sighed when he felt arms wrap around him and tighten.

"I like them, so nothing else should matter, right?" Lavi mumbled into Kanda wet hair. Kanda smiled at Lavi, knowing the redhead could see his face in the mirror.

"Yeah, I guess so." Kanda said.

After some time they were both into clean clothes and had already grabbed a quick bite to eat. Lavi was currently moving his stuff into Kanda's room. He couldn't stay with Panda anymore after quiting being a Bookman.

Kanda had the sleeves of his white shirts rolled up and his hair up in it's regular ponytail. Ears securred down with Lavi's scarf. He was currently placing and arranging books on the small bookshelf while Lavi put away all of his clothes and other items. Kanda's room was large enough for the two of them.

"Feels kind of... I don't know, Homey now huh Yu-chan?" Lavi asked with a wide smile, looking around the room to see everything. It had been cleaned up and arranged so their was a lot of floor space in the middle and everything else was close or against the walls.

"Che, baka Usagi." Kanda muttered, looking up from placing the books away with a slight scowl on his face. Lavi sauntered over and placed a little peck on his lips.

"Your baka Usagi." he said with a laugh, going over to sit on the bed. Kanda's lips upturned into a tiny smile as he stood up and brushed the dust off his knees. Wincing, he placed a hand on his lower back. "Sore?" Lavi asked with a questionable look. His green eye showing general concern.

"You'd think after getting taken agaisnt a tiled wall in a shower I would be." Kanda said while walking over and laying out on the bed beside Lavi. Lavi chuckled and played with his ponytail when a knock was heard at the door. "Not again.." Lavi heard Kanda mumble into the bed sheets.

Standing up, Lavi shuffled through the room, stepping over empty boxes that needed to be picked up. Opening the door he saw Lenalee and Allen.

"So you're moving in with Kanda now?" Allen asked, not knowing the true reason yet. Lavi hadn't told anyone but Kanda and Panda had to have told Komui.

"Yup, gotta problem with it, Moyashi?" Lavi asked, using Kanda's insult on the teen.

"It's Allen, baka Usagi!" Allen shouted out. In less than a second he was back first on the floor with Mugen to his throat. Kanda stood hovering over him.

"Only I have a right to call him that." Kanda growled out, famous glare in place. Stepping back he sheathed Mugen and let Allen stand up.

"May we come in?" Lenalee asked, unfased by the usual. Kanda nodded, going back to his spot lying on the bed. His ears were still covered, thanks to the scarf. Lenalee and Allen didn't notice.

"Wow, it's a little messy." Allen remarked, never knowing Kanda to have a disorderly room. Now that Lavi was around it was going to change. Lavi snickered.

"Now that I'm around it ain't always going to be clean." Lavi said while patting Kanda on the head. "Right, Yu-chan?" Lavi asked with a smile. Kanda shoved Lavi off the bed with his foot before sitting up to shout at him when the power suddenly went off.

Lenalee yelped in fear and Allen was heard letting out an 'oomf' from tripping over a box, or two. Everything fell silent in the pitch black room before Lavi spoke up.

"Lenalee, Allen, you two okay?" the redhead asked, hearing their responses. All of a sudden Allen's eye was heared activating.

"Akuma." the teen said harshly, making sure everyone was on guard.

"Yu-chan, are you there?" Lavi asked, feeling the hairs on his neck stand when he got no reply. "Yu-chan?"

The window shattered sending glass shards flying, a muffled shout and growl being heard. A struggling fight was heard in the darkness, hits being landed. Lavi jumped to wear the sound was, catching Kanda's ponytail and pulling it out of it's tie before the hair slipped out of his grasp. The scarf followed suit. Allen activated his innocence, which lit up most of the dark room.

The light showed Kanda tussling with a cloaked figure, which happened to be the akuma. Lavi made a lunge at it, not having his Hammer on him to help. Being struck away, Kanda was tackled to the floor and pinned down. The cloaked figure managed to inject Kanda with another dart (go figure) before Allen could land a well aimed hit. The akuma dissapated into dust, leaving the four Exorcists in the dim light.

Kanda let out a keening cry of pain as he gripped onto his neck where the dart left a bleeding puncture wound. Lavi was by his side when the lights flickered back on. His cat ears where gone, much to Lavi's relief, but now a whole new chain of events was about to begin.

Writhing on the floot as the effects started to kick in, all Kanda could do was groan and cry out while the pain coursed through his veins.

Lenalee and Allen helped move Kanda up on the bed, Lavi holding a hand over the wound to stop the bleeding. Kanda's arms were occupied with being wrapped around his stomach where all the pain blossomed.

"Yu, come on. Yu, talk to me." Lavi said to Kanda, rubbing his back with his clean hand. Kanda didn't vocally respond, eyes clenched shut.

"Do you want me to go get help?" Lenalee asked, slight panic in her voice. Allen took over rubbing Kanda's back so Lavi could focus on getting some response from the male.

"It's fine, but can you run and grab me a cloth and bowl of cold water?" Lavi asked, putting on a smile for Lenalee. She quickly nodded her head, pigtails bouncing, before darting out of the room.

"So it happened again." Allen stated, watching Kanda ease up as the pain lessened. His muscles were tensed up still.

"Yeah..." Lavi sighed before going back to his main focus. "Come on Yu, talk to me." he said softly, hoping Kanda could hear him. Kanda groaned and shook Allen's and Lavi's hands away.

"Going... t-to be... s-sick..." Kanda managed to whisper out. Lavi quickly grabbed a garbage can and Allen quickly pulled the ebony hair back before Kanda leaned over and puked.

To Allen and Lavi, it sounded painful. So did the fit of dry heaves afterward. Lenalee made her dashingly quick entrance just as Kanda stopped and pulled his head back up.

Lenalee moved Lavi aside and wiped Kanda's mouth clean before rinsing the cloth out and placin it on his forehead.

"You're burning up Kanda, so please, rest for now. We will figure things out later." Lenalee cooed gently, stroking her fingers through Kanda's bangs as he closed his eyes. Setting the bowl of water on the small night stand by the bed she stood up and stepped away. Lavi and Allen followed her to the other side of the room to discuss things.

"That was frightening." Allen whispered to the two of them, running a hand through his ashy white hair.

"Yes, but Lavi, you need to keep a close eye on him. I'm not sure why the akuma will go so far to do this... but it can't be good." Lenalee said, keeping her voice low. Her eyes showed concern and the adrenaline fear had caused her.

"If he gets any worse I'll make sure to let Komui know and get him to the medical wing." Lavi said back, keeping his anger for letting this happen again on the inside. Allen agreed, glancing back to see Kanda stir slightly.

"Komui should have the results from his last testing in by this evening, so I'll be sure to drop them off. Now, Allen, let's leave Kanda in Lavi's care." Lenalee said while ushering Allen towards the door with her. Lavi gave a worrisome look back at Kanda before turning to hear Allen speak.

"Good luck." the teen said before the door closed. Lavi sighed in defeat, shoulders sagging. Numerous questions went through his head on how this could have happened, but he put them aside upon hearing Kanda.

"L-Lavi..." a weak voice sounded in the red heads ears. Kanda was watching him with half lidded eyes, a hand reached out. Lavi walked over and interlaced their fingers, a soft expression on his face.

"Feeling better?" Lavi asked softly, making Kanda scoot over so he could lay next to him. Kanda snuggled into him, wrappin thin, pale arms around Lavi's torso.

"Tired..." was the mumbled response. Lavi smiled, and cleared his throat gently before a softer, melodic sound followed.

"I know youre always there... to hear my every prayer inside. Im clinging to the promise of a lifetime. I hear the words you say... to never walk away from me and leave behind. The promise of a lifetime.." Kanda smiled into Lavi's chest and moved away to let his own voice flow lightly.

"I am holding on to the hope I have inside. With you I will stay through every day, putting my understanding aside. I am comforted..." Kanda finished before drifting off, a wide smile across his lips. Lavi loved him even more at that moment, and he pulled the blanket up over Kanda before slipping out of his grasp.

"I love you." Lavi whispered before placing a kiss on Kanda's forehead. Straightening up, he left the room as silently as possible. He needed to pay a visit to Komui.

- Break -

"What do you mean by that!" Lavi shouted at Komui, his temper flared as the other sat calmy in his seat. Komui looked back down at the papers on his desk mid-sip of coffee.

"It's exactly as I said Lavi. Now, I am not entirely sure what the second injction will do... but it has to be related to Kanda being-" Komui was cut off once more by Lavi.

"It's not possible for that! It just can't be!" Lavi shouted, torn between mixed emotions about the whole ordeal. He wasn't sure if he should be happy, scared, angry, or worried. Grabbing the papers off of Komui's desk he brought them up close to his face.

Reading down all of the lines, he didn't know what to do. "Kanda is..." Lavi didn't finished the sentence as he fainted from the shock. Conviently Lenalee chose that moment to come in and was the quickest to catch Lavi and place him on the small couch.

"I take it he knows now?" Lenalee asked her older brother, small sarcasm in her voice. She herself was skeptical. Komui just nodded and went back to drinking his coffee.

- Chp. 3 End-

Yay! I said the end of the week, right? Oh I forget...

But, I want all you readers to try and guess whats wrong with Kanda! Please review and tell me, I'd love to see how many of you get it right (which might be all of you)

Heh :) -Marmar723