Chapter 2:

He was happy that his wish was granted and she did call him that night.

"So did you win any soccer matches or did little ones just run around haphazardly making you shout instructions in your traditional non-colloquial grammatically perfect extra-long sentences?" She didn't do much to contain her laughter. Being what he was and given how they dealt with different levels of law enforcements, civilians and media community, he ensured that his words were always politically correct and never gave any room for other party to find a loophole in his speech. Even though everyone in the team was exactly like that when they were on field, he was always like that even when they were in office. She didn't know him enough outside the work so she had just presumed his out of office speech pattern.

"Prentiss, that's not a very nice thing to say." He said chucking at her jab. "You are talking to the coach who has two wins in a row under his belt. Of course the credit also goes to the assistant coach who happens to Dave Rossi." He wondered what she would make out of this arrangement. He was surprised at Dave's offer but he had read the spunk in the man's eyes.

"Rossi too?" Surprise was evident in her voice. "Now that's a sight I would love to see." He didn't miss the longing in her voice. Giving up her life in DC had come with a heavy cost. Of course there were things that she had lost. There were also things that could have been; and those things bothered him the most.

"It's a very pleasant experience Emily. After dealing with the kind of work we do, being surrounded by innocence is an exhilarating feeling. I don't think there is anything in this world which can be as satisfying as spending a day with your child." He closed his eyes when he spoke as images of smiling Jack along with his friends flashed in his mind. He sincerely wished she could feel what he was currently feeling.

The contentment he was feeling as a father.

She didn't respond. There was a part of her which longed for a child and he wasn't unaware of that. During one case which had involved a girl losing her entire family, Emily had shown interest in taking that girl in. He had doubted her judgment then. She had looked aghast at his insinuation and then completely disappointed when he told her that the girl had found relatives who were ready to take her in.

"I realized what I had signed up for when Ian Doyle introduced me his son. I don't think I can ever have a family given the life I have lead Hotch. The feathers I have ruffled, people I have brought losses to and the people I have betrayed are continually hampering my sanity by reminding me what I have done and those memories have made me severely paranoid. Given how it did come true, I am glad that I didn't leave any blood ties behind." Her cheerful disposition seemed to have contained and her voice had turned husky with emotion. He understood where she was coming from and he knew that she was right.

"Entire team went to an Italian restaurant for dinner last night; the one you and Reid frequently visited." He had to steer the conversation away from the topic of children. She was a natural when it came to children and not having any of her own wasn't a topic he wanted to dwell on. It wasn't something they could speak over the phone given her predicament which could turn potentially dangerous if she lost focus.

"You did? How did you like the food?" She sounded surprised and wondering how he came to know about it. He noticed that she was specifically directing the question to him alone and alienating rest of the team. She clearly wasn't too comfortable talking about rest of the team given how she had vanished from their lives. He deiced to give her enough exits and allow her to take whichever suited her plight. And when her guilt freed her from its stronghold, maybe then she would take the exit he wanted her to take and she could finally talk about her friends.

"It was wonderful. I am planning to dine there again with my brother Sean when he visits me. He is aspiring to become a chef and I am sure he would love the place." He wasn't much of a foodie but was definitely a fan of fine cuisine. Emily's upbringing reflected clearly in her tastes and the restaurant that had turned to be her frequent hangout place.

"Ask Reid about the breakfast place which sells killer chocolate filled croissants. I am sure you and Jack would love it on a lazy Sunday morning." He made a mental note to ask Reid about it. "How is Strauss doing?" She threw in that question from nowhere. Given how influential her family was in bureaucratic circles, she had known Strauss, his boss, before coming to BAU. Emily was thoroughly annoyed with Hotch when he had insinuated about her pursuing a personal political agenda in BAU behind his back.

"You want to know about Strauss? Seriously? Prentiss, I am starting to get this feeling that all of this is an elaborate plan of yours to become my boss or worse, fire me from my job." She laughed gaily at his silly reason. The trace of emotional glitches was reduced in her system and was now replaced with a neutral topic which had always amused him. She wasn't a fan of Strauss and she made it very obvious when Strauss insisted on implicating Hotch. Her loyalty had initially surprised him and later had him appreciate her even more.

"She has this yearly ritual of thoroughly annoying you with some random bullshit ideas. You get stressed even more around this time of the year dealing with daily job and her nonsensical changes that are mostly pointless." Her acerbic words had him burst out laughing. She wasn't too off the mark when it came to Strauss but him being him, didn't blame his boss about the decisions that she made. She was also a part of chain of command and she had her own goals to meet for the year. And he just happened to be the guy who would be crucial for her to meet her goals.

"Strauss is being Strauss Emily. Nothing has changed there. She did ask me to talk to the team and give her a report – about how they feel after your exit." He told her honestly.

"And who will you talk to?" She asked him. He had avoided asking himself that question and had completely ignored it till now. He had decided to make up some wooly answer if Strauss asked him at all. "Do you talk to Haley?" She asked when he didn't answer her question.

"I rarely talked to Haley about work when she was alive, Emily. She didn't want to know about what kind of people I dealt with nor did she wanted to be made aware of the horrific reality that our society showed us on a daily basis. Yes, I do talk to her but it's mostly about Jack. She didn't want to hear it then and I am not going to start now." The team was shocked when they came to know that their boss was getting divorced. She had witnessed the love and companionship Hotch and Haley had shared and wondered how it got deteriorated in a matter of year. Was their job so notorious that it had managed to break two decades of relationship?

"I wish you would talk to someone Hotch." She said helplessly. Had she been there maybe she would have thrown in an indignant look.

"I am talking to you." He said quietly. The implication of his words was not lost on her and the silence on the other end of the line reflected her understanding.

She was quiet for a moment deciding upon how to respond to her ex-boss. She seemed to realize that her next choice of words would change everything that was going to come. They would both continue this semi-cordial association as long as it lasted or they could get past all of this and really get to talking.

"I am always here." Her simple response bought a smile on his face. The significance of her words bombarded his senses. The avalanche in his chest that he perpetually harbored since things started getting bitter between him and Haley seem to rest a little. A serene calmness enveloped him which was born from the warmth of an assurance.

"I will talk to you soon Hotch." She bid goodbye and hung up without waiting for a response from him.

-o00o-

One week later:

"Is it true Hotch?" Agent Jordan Todd stormed into his office on late Friday evening, despair evident on her face.

"Is Emily really dead?" She asked when she realized that she wasn't making much sense with her initial question. He stared at the distraught ATF agent for a moment and slowly nodded his head. He honestly hadn't expected her to react in this way. Jordan collapsed on the seat and hung her head. When she looked up, her eyes were clouded with thin layer of tears. He was taken aback with her reaction.

"I didn't know at all. I never thought…I didn't expect…I can't believe this is happening." Head in her hands, Jordan finally relented to the truth.

"Jordan, I apologize for not contacting you and telling you about this. But I wasn't aware that Emily maintained a contact with you." She nodded.

"After I left BAU and returned to ATF, we met once or twice a month for dinner or just drinks. With her I didn't have to pretend that everything was alright in the world, like I had to with my other friends'. With her, it was simple to bitch and rant about work without my integrity being judged." Jordan had worked with them for the shortest duration, helping them when JJ was on maternity leave. She had started off with a wrong foot with him and also with Morgan to an extent and the pressure of working in BAU had finally caught up with her.

"She wasn't one of those who made elaborate appearances and used sappy lines to get people to talk. She asked me about paperwork which she knew wouldn't route through me. For a moment I thought her as this ditzy female who doesn't understand office document route. Even before I could complete my thought process I realized that it was her way of getting me to take my mind off whatever was bugging me. I had ended up smiling and thanking her for checking up on me. And after that I took upon her offer to see her when things felt closing in on me." Jordan wasn't looking at him. She ran her index finger on the rim of water glass he had offered her and seemed to be thinking of an entirely different lifetime.

"You enjoyed working with her then?" He wanted to know more about this woman and Emily's relationship. He wasn't too surprised with Emily's close association with the rest of the team. But Jordan had spent less than four months with them which was almost two years ago.

"I wanted the temporary position created by JJ's leave badly Hotch. Everyone knows that working with BAU takes you to places only that no outsider can fathom what dealing with the sickest people of the society can do to you. And after the initial run-in with you, I thought that I had screwed up my entire career by messing with 'The' Aaron Hotchner. You remember the case with Viper? I don't think I can ever forget that night in my life when she thoroughly destroyed a narcissistic jackass's ego. Work is most enjoyable when you and your partner are completely in sync. She is one of those few people with who I enjoyed working in the field a lot." Jordan looked up and met his gaze. He could see admiration and respect in her eyes for the older woman.

"There were times in my job when I looked pure hatred in eyes of men which had me restless. The more I delved into reasons for that hatred, the more restless my mind became. Emily is, no, was, the only girlfriend I had who knew exactly what I was going through. She didn't comfort me with fortune cookie words; she didn't tell me that everything was going to be alright. She asked me to suck it up and do my job. And if a day comes when the restlessness progresses to claustrophobic sensation not allowing you to breathe or think rationally, then it's the time to hand over your badge and gun." She chuckled remembering one of the earliest conversations she had had after moving out of BAU. A random call to Emily had ended up them spending most of the evening at a club drinking and just having a good time. She was going to miss her, she was certain of that.

"I am sorry Jordan." He was sorry for the young woman for losing a friend. He was sorry for lying to the same young woman about her friend's death. He was sorry for the kind of jobs they did which slowly ate away their sanity. He was sorry that he didn't contact Jordan for Emily's funeral.

She nodded and stood up. "Thank you for listening Hotch and am sorry for taking up much of your time." He shook her hands.

"It was not at all a problem. Take care, Jordan."

The day had ended with a surprise visit from Jordan but she had told him about Emily which he honestly didn't expect. It threw him off the loop and wondered how far she went to make people around her – old and new to make them comfortable.

And it was really unfortunate that no one really knew her at all.