I love you guys, all, period.

Disclaimer: K, nope, I don't own Sonny with a Chance, duh.

Everything seemed to have just gone from worse, to worst. As I watched my life be nothing but alright. I don't know how all of these have gotten into that, and I was angered at myself to have made it worst. I couldn't quite make a nice, or right decision since the day has started, I was irked by every little thing that people around me do. Specifically, when Sonny kept on babbling and babbling on how her day was so perfect, that put me down on the dumps. I was so, what's the word? Depressed? I was so depressed that I made such a mistake of shouting at her. I was so depressed that I made a mistake of not saying sorry. I was – wait, hold on, this wasn't depression, this was pride, and when it all comes to that, I'm the number one egomaniac in the whole tri-state area. I wasn't gonna let my pride down for someone so Sonny. That doesn't make sense, but who the hell cares? But, well, let me explain my situation: I was half an hour late for Sonny & I's date. See the image? But, I just couldn't explain it to her to how or why I was late. Not now, not ever. So blah blah blah, I acted like a jerk with three heads, and I got her to dump me. That had never crossed my mind whatsoever, and I was gonna plan to make her un-dump me right then and there. But I don't know what got the best of me as I muttered the three words that I know will make a big, deep, hole in my heart. And yes, I have a heart. How do you think I will have lived if I had none? But anyway, back to the explaining thing, I dunno why I am explaining this in my head. Ugh. Maybe because I wanna clear my mind and figure things out. K, that's a fine and probable explanation for me. So, yeah, I muttered the three words, and no, not I love you, nor I hate you. It was this, fine with me. But of course, it wasn't fine with me, so obviously it was a lie! But I couldn't take back what I already had said; it is just as hard as you have told a diver to stop diving when he already has jumped over the board. I was in this deep, and I do not have a single idea how to fix this crap.

So I planned to un-rattle my thoughts. And the easiest solution to that was to take a walk. And never have I, in my eighteen years of existence, decided to take a walk, by myself. It was just going down fine as I stepped out of the sliding glass door of the restaurant we were in. I was walking, settling my thoughts and nerves, when I spotted two young children walking hand in hand. Hell no! They are probably like 10 or something. Where are your parents, kids? But I decided to just shrug it off and continued my experiment of walking. So there I was again, walking, feeling a bit cold, but decided it didn't matter, when I saw two old couple a few feet away from me, sitting in a bench, looking all happy and in love. I kicked an invisible thing in my feet to release my anger. Why does it have to be this time of the day that they have to be all lovey dovey and stuff? First, two cute children hand in hand, second, an old aged couple acting like teenagers, and wait, there was another again, there were teenagers – probably their age – showing some really great affection towards each other. I shuddered at that thought. Was I acting like that too when I was with So-? Answer: yes. But that wasn't why the thought isn't pleasing, it was because it kinda makes me miss So-, alot.

Cafeteria

April 18, 2011

9:10 AM

So there I was, picking at my food, thinking that I had no appetite. It was then when So- came in, the reason I nearly choked on whatever was chokable. Dammit, I really need to work on that sometimes. Why do I have to get so awe-struck every time she comes in my view? Have I not gotten used to it, before? Answer: no. So I decided to play it cool, thinking she would somehow cross my way and just ignore me, and I would just admire her from afar. I was downright wrong. When she caught a glimpse of me, she smiled brightly and I was confused,

"Hi, Chad" she greeted, eyes bright, smile seductive, hair looking all pretty.

"Uhhhhh" I stammered.

She settled herself across of me, looking me in the eye, as if nothing had happened yesterday. "Oh, c'mon Chad" she giggled, "What are you uhhh-ing about? Are you nervous, still, about yesterday? Grow up! Move on, Chad" she said, smiling big.

Oh, so this was the game she was playing.

TA-DA! Down goes another chapter, yay. Please, review, it makes my day!

It'sLittleMe: Awh, thanks. Haha

mrpuppy: That has been the sweetest thing someone had ever told me, you're awesome, mate. End of story.

PaCmAn FeVeR: Haha, thanks. I heart you!