An Hourglass

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

A man was to be sentenced, and the judge told him, "You may make a statement. If it is true, I'll sentence you to four years in prison. If it is false, I'll sentence you to six years in prison." After the man made his statement, the judge decided to let him go free. What did the man say?

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Alice and Hatter hadn't spoke much since leaving Tobias and Lux. Hatter had attempted to start a conversation several times but his speech always failed him before words left his lips, leaving him opening and closing is mouth repeatedly every couple of minutes.

Dormouse was back on Alice's shoulder, Hatter knowing that she would enjoy the tiny mouse's company, though she only gave him a weak smile when he placed dormouse there. Unlike the other creatures of Wonderland Dormouse was the least intimidating with his tiny size and with the fact he slept constantly. Though, Dormouse on a treacle rush and smashing every good teapot was not a pretty sight, as Hatter had found out.

The forest had gotten denser the deeper they went in, the true terror Wonderland was experiencing due to the Queen of Hearts obvious to Alice as she looked all around her. The trees were a dull brown, the leaves falling to the ground in a dead green, there were no lighting bugs in the trees or in the ground to light their path, everything a dull, murky green instead of the neon purples, greens and blues she had seen in Tea Tree Forest. The birds were no longer singing and there seemed to be no breeze at all.

It seems to be the closer we get to the Looking Glass the worse Wonderland gets. Alice thought, pushed a branch away from her path. Hopefully this isn't a bad omen.

The sky was getting brighter, now turning a yellow colour as the sun got higher in the sky, giving off a comfortable heat, but the ominous grey clouds in the horizon weren't as welcoming. Alice was scared to ask how far they'd gone in case it wasn't very far at all. They'd been walking for hours, stopping every so often to take a piece of fruit of the trees to eat and drink from but from what she'd seen so far, not everything was what it seemed here. That and she had no idea if they had the same concept of time as she did.

"Where are we now?" Alice asked, her voice slightly horse from not speaking for a while. Hatter stopped and couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief. He'd thought he'd broken her when she'd stopped talking. Shaking his head to snap himself out of a daze he reached into his inner jacket pocket and took out the rough crystal map, holding it in the palm of his hand as it lit up.

"According to the map," he said, studying it carefully. "We're just about to come up to-"he cut off when he realised where they were, looking up quickly to find Alice who had continued walking a head, not realising Hatter had stopped.

"No, no, no, no, no!" Hatter called from behind her, running over to her in a panic causing him to trip over one of the many tree roots that stuck out from the ground. Alice turned, stopping and frowning at him with her hands on her hips.

"What's wrong?" she asked, looking back to the path in front of her.

"Not that way!" Hatter picked himself up off the ground awkwardly in an attempt to crack his muscles at the same time. "Never that way! This way." He stated, going behind her and pushing her shoulders so she was walking to the left.

"But this way is faster isn't it?" Alice asked, confused and looking into the dark forest a head as they walked passed it.

"Of course." He stated, looking into the forest with wary eyes. "But that's Vampire territory." Usually vampire's wouldn't have worried Alice – having seen so many shows were the Vampire's acted like a depressed emotional teenagers - but they way he said it...it was almost as if he was saying it was Jabberwock mating grounds

"What's so bad about Vampires?" Alice asked innocently, turning to him.

"What's so bad about Vampires?" he asked incredulously, letting Alice go so he could walk beside her. "Have you not heard of them in your world?" Alice nodded, frowning in confusion.

"Of course! But, from all that I've seen of them they're a bunch depresses teenagers that desperately need Prozac and run around chasing underage girls while sparkling in the process. " Alice said, shrugging. Hatter watched her with confused eyes, as if worried about her mental health. Slowly he put the back of his hand to her head, feeling for a temperature.

"You feel fine. Maybe Wonderland's getting to you more than I thought." He said more to himself than Alice. Alice smiled at him, shaking her head and his limited knowledge of the human world.

"I'm being serious." She laughed, walking beside him. "There is a book about Vampire that sparkles and fall in love with a young girl." Hatter, looked a head, the lines on his forehead showing that he was thinking hard.

"And you like it I presume?" Alice shrugged.

"It was okay. Maybe not classic English literature but few popular books are." She replied. Hatter gave her a worrying look, scoffing.

"And you call me mad? Sparkling Vampire's indeed!" he scoffed, shaking his head. "I doubt you've even met a real vampire!" he continued, walking ahead.

"No. Vampires don't exist, at least where I come from." She added quickly, knowing that those weren't the best words to use there.

"Exactly!" he exclaimed, now ranting. "Now a real Vampire! Pfft! They wouldn't look twice at a young girl and usually spell serious trouble. Well..." he paused, looking to the side as if weighing the options, his nose crunching up in disgust. "They probably couldn't spell trouble, but you get my meaning." Alice chuckled, enjoying the Hatter's ranting.

"So..." Alice smiled, scuffing her feet across the ground as she walked, hands behind her back. "What are vampires really like then?" Hatter rolled his eyes, hands moving as he illustrated his answers.

"Blood thirsty monsters, that's what they are. Yeah, they may be good-looking but it's sorta difficult to see through the blood they've got drippin' from their faces. They're like a pack of bloody hyena's the lot of them." He looked to Alice that who was watching him with a smile. "That's why we aren't going that way." He pointed to the forest they were walking passed, giving her knowing look. "You take one step in there and you're Vampire food, and no Queen will even batter an eyelid." Hatter shook his head in disgust, looking to Alice in confusion as he heard her laughter.

"What's so funny?" he asked, the accent still there. Alice chuckled again.

"When you're angry," she started. "You get an Irish accent. I never noticed it until now." She replied, still laughing. Hatter frowned.
"What's an Irish and an accent?" he asked, confused. Alice shook her head and rolled his eyes as she chuckled, her laughter dying down.

"It'll take too long to explain." she replied, shaking her head. "So their allowed to kill people?" she asked in an attempt to change the subject. She didn't really want to discuss the history of Ireland to Hatter. It being him, she'd most likely be explaining it for years to come.

"Pretty much. Vampires are the hardest race to control, after a couple hundred of years the Queens just gave up. Even the Queen of Hearts herself gets the willies when Vampire's are mentioned." Alice nodded, looking to Hatter again. He'd calmed down now, his usual accent free voice back. She couldn't place it, almost as if it was a mixture of English and American. "They're the only creatures in Wonderland that can kill a Jabberwock with their bare hands." He shrugged sadly, before looking to Alice and grinning. "Which is why we aren't going that way." He pointed to Alice's right. "We're going to have to go around. Unless you want to take part in a death match with a Vampire?" he asked with a teasing grin. Alice glared at him as she smiled, elbowing him in the shoulder.

"Ha, ha. Hilarious." She said, chuckling slightly. She looked down, rubbing her left arm as she tried to hold back her question. Not that it seemed to be helping.

"Hatter," she started, not looking up. "Why did you help me?" Hatter looking to her in shock, as if the question insulted him. "I remember you said it was because the Queen of Hearts is after me. But, why would you care if she found me? I'm just a human after all." She said. Hater was silent for a while, thinking over the best way to put everything. Taking off his hat he scratched his head while twirling the hat in the other hand.

"Wonderland..." his voice was sad, considering as he looked down. "Is dying." The statement was simple, straightforward. But it seemed within that one sentence the entire forest when silent. Even the small cricket noises that had followed them through the forest stopped, Goosebumps raising on Alice's arms as the silence unnerved her. "Everyday a different creature becomes extinct and every day the Queen of Hearts takes more magic. The magic that keeps Wonderland going." He looked over to Alice who was watching him carefully, the look on her face showing him that she didn't totally understand.

"Remember when you left the Tea Shop and I said that air was magic?" he asked. Alice nodded. "It is. Pure magic is what Wonderlanders breathe. Pure, untainted magic. Y'see," he started explaining spinning his hat. "Your 'air' is filled with little mites and dirty little things that just love magic. If we breathed that then...well we wouldn't be Wonderland now would we? Though," he sighed, throwing the hat up in the air and catching it on his head. "The magic is running out. The Queen of Hearts is stealing the dreams from the humans and using them to keep herself young. Without those dreams..." he trailed off.

"Wonderland dies." Alice said sadly. Hatter nodded cautiously as he shrugged.

"It already is."Hatter looked to her with a meaningful glare. "That's why she can't get her hands on you. Even one human's dreams are enough to kill out an entire race. The Cheshire cats, White and Red knights are all gone, not to mention the singing flowers, Bill Lizard and his race. We can't risk her getting you. Who knows who'll die next." Alice watched as Hatter looked down, eyes cast over as he thought back on memories. Unsure what to do – for she was pretty much a hermit back home - she touched his shoulder awkwardly in an attempt to comfort him.

"Is there any way to stop her?" Alice asked. "Can't you...cut off her supply of dreams? How's she getting them anyway?" Hatter shrugged, standing straight in an attempt to get back some dignity.

"No one's really sure. Though there are rumours that Morpheus, the caretaker of dreams is helping her, through blackmail or personal choice nobody knows." Hatter looked to Alice who was watching him full of concern, and smiled.

"Is there any way we can get to him? Try and convince him to stop?" Alice asked. Hatter shook his head.

"He's a puppet under the Queen's spell most likely." He spat. "And anyway, the only way to break a blackmail bond is to know what's being used as blackmail in the first place."

"And there's no way of figuring that out." Alice stated as she nodded, already knowing the answer. If they knew it, they would have broken it by now. Hatter gave a small, sad smile and nodded.

"Anyway," he breathed in, grinning happily. "That's enough sadness for the day. We have to make it to Outland by sundown, that way we'll be ahead of schedule." Alice watched with sad eyes as Hatter walked a head, a large but obviously fake smile plastered across his face. He isn't telling me the whole story. What on earth is going on here?

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

The downpour had started an hour ago, soaking Hatter and Alice to the bone. Alice could barely see a foot in front of her, the trees waving as if she was staring from behind a running waterfall, the overcast sky not helping.

"I told you we should have stopped at the cave!" Alice called over the rain, trudging through the sludge and mud the rain had made in her black trainers. Hatter glared at Alice's back, his jaw clenched as he climbed over the large tree branch with ease, pushing back more than he usually did in an attempt to control his anger.

"Well, so-o-r-r-r-y your highness." Hatter spat, fixing his hat that dormouse slept under.

"But it's not like I knew that it was going to rain!" Adrenaline rushed through Alice's veins, making her hands shake. Stopping she turned to him swiftly, arms held out from her sides.

"Didn't know!" she exclaimed. "The sky was overcast for crying out loud! That's why I suggested we stop in the first place!" Now that Alice had stopped, Hatter marched up to her, pointing a finger in her face.

"You heard what Toby-"

"Tobias!"

"Whatever!" he shouted, his Irish accent creeping back in. "You heard what he said. Human's don't last long in Wonderland and last time I checked," Hatter stepped right up to Alice, close enough that he had to look down to keep eye contact. "Your human and there is a card army after us. So I'm sorry if my looking out for your wellbeing is a nu-"

He stopped.

"Hatter?" No answer. "Hatter?" Still nothing. "Oh man, Hatter please don't say it's another Jabberwock." She pleaded, looking behind him but the attempt fruitless. Hatter still didn't reply, but his tense posture wasn't lost on Alice, either was the hand he held in front of her torso.

"We aren't so lucky this time." His voice was quiet through the rain, but the terror held within his shaking voice said enough.

"You are under arrest!" the thundering voice caught Alice off guard, every muscle jumping slightly in surprise, causing her to grab onto Hatter shoulder. "If you run we will open fire! I repeat we will open fire!" Her entire body began to tremble and her chest became tight as the thought of hundreds of creatures surrounding them. Too many. Too many people. Trying to stop herself hyperventilating, Alice gripped Hatter's shoulder tighter and slammed her eyes shut. Calm down Alice remember what Dr McShannon said. Oh shoot, these guys can hurt me.

"Why do I suddenly have the picture of the Judoon in my head." Alice's voice panicky, her pathetic mantra of "they can't hurt me" still repeating over in over even as her breathing became more shallow.

"This isn't the time to talk about human things that I won't understand, okay!" Hatter bit back, now totally in front of her.

"Hand yourself in and you won't be harmed!" Hatter gave a cynical laugh.

"Oh yeah, cause taking our dreams from us before having us killed isn't harming us at all is it!" Alice almost gave out a giddy laugh at his accent, the sudden increase in oxygen in her system making her giddy, Hatter's glare swiftly turning it into a cough.

"You wouldn't happen to have plan would you?" he asked as he turned back slowly. Alice looked at him incredulously.

"Me have a plan! You're the guide you should have a bloody plan!"

"Silence or we will fire! Hand yourself in!" the booming voice interrupted. Alice gave a sad chuckle.

"They'd be a lot less scary if I could see them." She said pathetically, close to tears as her shaking became noticeable. "Do we really have a choice?" she asked, looking up to Hatter whose expression was desperate.

"No." The statement simple and breaking. "But that doesn't meaning we'll never have a choice." Alice gave him an incredulous look, of all the times to go Mad on me it would be now!

"Alice?" Hatter called, his voice so far away, as if cotton wool had been stuffed in here ears. "Alice what's wrong?" Alice faintly felt him holding her up as her legs turned to jelly and eye sight faded over.

"I-" she gasped. "I can't-breathe!" her breathed jagged and gasping as she felling down completely, Hatter her only thing keeping her up.

"I repeat! Hand yourselves-" the sound of a gunshot echoed through the air, stopping the speaker in his tracks and making Hatter jump, but Alice was unaffected, still trying to control her breathing.

"What the living Bandersnatch was that!" Hatter exclaimed, covering Alice from the fire.

"I believe the better term is who in the living Bandersnatch is that." An unmistakeably female voice called out. Out from behind the suffocating Alice, a cloaked figure emerged from the cover of the trees, the arm that held an old-fashioned looking gun held in the air.

"Shit." Hatter said under his breath, his tense posture relaxing, replaced with a relax one.

"This land is off limits! Leave now or suffer the consequences!" the woman shouted, her voice strong and demanding. Now I feel pathetic. I can't even handle a simple situation like this.

"We will leave after the prisoners have been captur-"

"No!" the woman interrupted, pulling back the clips thus loading the gun, as a threat. "They are on my land and are now my problem. After all they cannot be prisoners until after they've been caught!"

"I am under strict orders from the Queen of-"

"I take no orders from that swine of a woman! Now leave!"

Everything went silent for a while, only the rain still thundering down echoing through the forest. Calm down Alice. Breathe for Pete's sake!

"Breathe." The woman said, now in front of Alice taking her off guard. As she went to speak the woman's palm connected with Alice's chest and a large gust of air awakened Alice's lungs making her gasp. Coughing at her rough throat, Hatter made sooting motions on her back, Alice staring wide eyed at the figure.

"What on-"

"Come with me." The woman interrupted softly, holding out her hand to Alice. The woman's face was hidden by a long black cloak, protecting her from the rain and her hands were also covered in black leather gloves that disappeared into her cloak arms, making her seem like a shadow. Hatter went to pull Alice away but the woman spotted it.

"Come with me or I call the cards back." She threatened. Frowning at the woman's bitter tone towards Hatter she looked to him, going to ask him what to do when she spotted his pained look.

"Hatter?" she said warily, touching his shoulder in worry. Who is this woman?

"Come on Alice." He said, grabbing her hand and dragging her along. The woman gave out a short chuckle in reply before turning to lead the way.

"So, Hatter. What brings you to my territory." The woman said with a smile in her voice. "The last I heard was that you weren't leaving the forest."

"I felt like a change of scenery." Alice held back a laugh at Hatter's comment, Hatter replying by squeezing her hand.

"Of course. Who's your little friend?" she asked, the smile evident in her voice. Hatter's grip on Alice's hand got stronger but she didn't mind.

"A traveller." He replied before Alice could say anything. "I'm taking her to the Looking Glass." The woman stopped.

"The Looking Glass is off limits to anyone but Morpheus. And why would a Wonderlander...Ah..." with a smile on her face, she turned to Alice's taking her off guard. "You're a human." She stated. Before Alice could say anything, Hatter interrupted.

"And we need to get her out of here, before-"

"The Queen of Hearts gets her, I know. Although that is the least of your worries." As the woman began to take down her hood Alice realised that the rain had stopped, now replaced with the soft singing of birds and the musty after rain smell.

"Come, we should leave before the cards change their minds." The woman said, her brown eyes shining with an evil glint and her bobbed platinum blonde hair hanging in front of her eyes.

"Of course." Hatter said stiffly. "Lead the way, Duchess."

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Anyone get the "Judoon" reference?