Second last chapter! Tissues ready, because I cried writing this. But that's just me. R&R!
Rhyleigh xoxox
Julie stared out the kitchen window, watching the rain fall in sheets, running her finger over the rim of her mug- despite the fact that it had been empty for the past fifteen minutes. The house was quiet, the only sound coming from Ruby, as she tried to convince her brother to allow her to wear the pink.
"This is my favourite!" Ruby sounded close to tears.
Little girls should wear pink, Julie noted, as Nathan held up the black dress Chel had bought Ruby. Little girls should wear pink, and not have to worry about wearing black.
"Come on, Rubes, work with me here", Nathan almost begged.
The little girl sighed. "'Kay".
Rachel pressed a kiss to the back of her mother's head. "You ready to go, Mum?"
"No", Julie said honestly. "Come on, Ruby, we have to go".
"I'll get her, Jules", Jake assured her, holding out his arms for the little girl. As Jake lifted her onto his side, Rachel adjusted the pigtails that had reminded their father so much of herself as a little girl.
The ride to the funeral home was silent, no matter which car you were travelling in. the wheels in the heads of the adults were whirring, as Ruby kicked her feet in her car seat, unsure of what was really happening.
Chel couldn't help but feel guilty that she had outlived her son. She had been so sick, and yet there she was, attending her son's funeral. She hadn't been the best mother in the world- she had barely been there for him, coming into his life less than a year before Ruby was born. She had thought she'd have a lot longer to make up for it, a long and healthy life to spend with her son. She thought she'd have longer than they had.
Julie concentrated on the road ahead of her, despite she not being the one behind the wheel, trying not to think. Thinking hurt too much. It was a dull ache inside her chest, trying to work out if a person really could die from a broken heart. It hurt so bad that she honestly thought she would stop living.
When they pulled up at the funeral home, Ben, Carbo and Melissa came over to greet them, huddled under a huge umbrella. Unstrapping Ruby from the seat, she jumped out of the car, landing in a puddle.
"Rubes", Julie said tiredly.
But Ruby simply blinked at her mother. "Daddy's crying".
Julie hadn't been sure if Ruby had grasped what was happening. But she knew, at that moment, that Ruby understood more than anyone gave her credit for.
"C'mon, Rubes". Sammy held her hand out for the little girl and Ruby latched on, starting the journey towards the big doors.
"Tom". Chel was surprised to see her son's father, standing there uncomfortably in his suit, Dave's nephew at his side.
Tom had never been there for his son- in fact, he was unaware that his son existed, up until the birth of his youngest granddaughter. Since then, he had tried to keep in contact, but being in gaol slowed it down. Dave had tried to visit, at least once a month, but had only visited once since the diagnosis.
"Hey", Tom said gruffly, as Coby nodded in acknowledgement.
"Hi Coby", Ruby said shyly.
Julie's tears had mixed with the rain from the sky, as she took her seat in the front pew, in between her father and oldest son. She spotted everyone who had ever meant anything to her husband- right down to Warney, who drove her up the wall. All the boys from cricket, those who he had worked with for years, even the boys from the boat club who Dave had a drink with every now and again. How she wished they could go back to the simple days, where Dave could stumble home at one in the morning, too many drinks under his belt, and she would just laugh it off.
Taking a deep, shaky breath, Julie began.
"Months ago, it rained for weeks straight. Ruby, our youngest daughter, declared that she hated the rain, but Dave convinced her otherwise, telling her that it was the angels crying, sad because they weren't here with us. As you can all see, today its raining, and as we were walking in Ruby simply said, 'Daddy's crying'". Swallowing a sob, she tried her hardest to continue.
But Ben took over, reading from the sheet of lined paper in front of his mother. "Dave told me that he had no regrets about the past. He only regretted the future. That he wouldn't be here to see Ruby's first day of school, first boyfriend, graduation day, or even her wedding. He wouldn't be here to see the birth of his grandchildren, or anything of the sort".
That was where Nathan stepped up to the plate. "And when I start to think of everything that he's not going to be here for, I find myself wondering how I'm going to live without him. He's been such a huge part of my life for so long, and I can't even remember what it was like without him. But then I look at our four beautiful children, and I can just see him in them. And anyone who's been around Ruby for even five minutes can tell that she's one hundred percent Dave's little girl". Nathan had to chuckle at the last comment, Rachel taking the sheet from him.
"But I am who I am today, because of him", Rachel said shakily, unable to stop her tears from falling. "He's been my best friend for thirty years. We would have been married for thirty one years this year".
It was hard to believe that everything had happened in less than a year.
"He would have given anything to have turned sixty. Or even fifty five. He nearly did make that one- his birthday's on Saturday". Rachel paused to wipe her tears. "If he were here right now, he would do anything he could to stop the tears. The one thing he hated the most was seeing people sad. Just remember him for who he was. His ability to make people laugh, no matter if what he said was funny or not".
Ruby climbed off the seat, heading towards where her older sister and brothers were standing, Ben scooping her into his arms. "Just remember", Ruby said seriously, "That the rain's just the angels crying".
Julie broke down, sobbing into her father's arms, and Ben felt his throat closing up with tears. The four Rafter children took their seats once more, for the service to continue.
They all cried until they had no more tears to shed, and by that time, the service was over.
Ruby pressed a kiss to the cool casket, admiring the flowers. "Love ya, Daddy".
And Julie just cried.