Naril: *hides behind closet* Hey guys here's an update!!!
Reno: Whiny….*cringes* YOU MADE ME WHINY!!!!
Naril: *dashes across the room to hide under the bed* I did not!
EMR: *crackles*
Naril: Not intentionally!!!!
Chapter II - The Frayed Ends of Sanity
Never Hunger
Never Prosper
I Have Fallen Prey to Failure
Struggle Within
Triggered Again
Now the Candle Burns at Both Ends
Twisting under Schizophrenia
Falling Deep into Dementia
Old Habits Reappear
Fighting the Fear of Fear
Growing Conspiracy
Everyone's after Me
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Hear Them Calling Me
Birth of Terror
Death of Much More
I'm the Slave of Fear,my Captor
Never Warnings
Spreading its Wings
As I Wait for the Horror She Brings
Loss of Interest,question,wonder
Waves of Fear They Pull Me under
Old Habits Reappear
Fighting the Fear of Fear
Growing Conspiracy
Everyone's after Me
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Hear Them Calling Me
Into Run
I Am Sinking
Hostage of this Nameless Feeling
Hell Is Set Free
Flooded I'll Be
Feel the Undertow Inside Me
Height,hell,time,haste,terror,tension
Life,death,want,waste,mass Depression
Old Habits Reappear
Fighting the Fear of Fear
Growing Conspiracy
Myself Is after Me
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Frayed Ends of Sanity
Hear Them Calling
Hear Them Calling Me
-
Metallica
Clouded turquoise eyes were staring out the large windowpane at the flickering fire in another part of the city. It had been three days. Three days and the remains of Sector 7 were still burning. Of course Shinra claimed it was too dangerous for fire fighters to go in. In reality, they probably wanted to make sure anyone still under the rubble really was dead.
Or maybe, Reno thought as he leant heavily against the wall beside the window, they did it on purpose to remind him of what he had done. Of course that was complete rubbish, he knew that, but he was too out of it to really care either way. It was there and that was bad enough. He tried to tell himself that he had not had much choice, that he could not have refused an order.
"Bullshit." He croaked to himself.
Suppressing a wince as his still aching body protested at the movement, he raised the bottle he clutched in a death grip back to his lips. He had checked himself out from hospital, painkillers still diluting his blood. Taking a long swig, he ignored the twinge in his useless right arm in the sling the nurse had insisted on keeping. The smell of locoweed was still heavy in the air.
He had gone through all his supplies, short of taking the sleeping pills he kept beside the bed. All it did was dull his throbbing body, but that was not enough. He had even tried that damn M-tentacle concentrate and he only got a nosebleed. It did nothing on the picture he was confronted with every time he looked out his window. He just wanted it to go away.
He had looked for something stronger, but there was nothing else there. So he had tried to make up for that through quantity.
It had not worked. He was left bleary-eyed and all too sluggish, but the sight of the fire still burnt the same deep ugly hole in his chest. In the end he had just dragged himself over to his cupboard in hopes of finding something he had missed until then, something, anything that might work in getting rid of the acid threatening to creep up his throat and the knot tightening up his insides. He knew it was guilt, just did not want to acknowledge that. All he had come up with was that bottle of Icicle vodka he could not even remember getting. There was less than half of it left.
With a dull thud, the Turk let his forehead bang against the glass, still not able to, or not wanting to tear his gaze away. He was not sure anymore. Could he not just pass out? He should not have gotten out in the first place. He had been sure this should have been the end. It would have been easier if he had simply died.
Eventually he turned away, intending to continue his fruitless search for anything to numb his mind. Instead, his already unsteady legs gave up on him and he slid to the floor, unceremoniously slumped into the corner of his living room.
At first he just sat there, not quite sure how he had ended up in this position, then he cradled the bottle closer, head hanging low. Something glinted a few inches to his left in one of the drawers he had pretty much turned upside down in his desperate search. Head lolling feebly in that direction, his half-lidded gaze focused on the switchblade. He had owned it ever since he could think, could not even remember where he got it. It was pretty much the only thing he had always been able to rely on if he thought about it.
Clumsy fingers reached for the knife, clasping it tightly as he brought it up and studied it intently. The wooden handle had scratches and nicks all over it. He ran a shaky finger over one of the deeper ones. Turning it over, he flicked the blade in and out a few times.
He flinched as the sharp metal dug into his palm, blood welling out.
Blinking sluggishly, Reno watched the wound bleed in fascination. The warm crimson trail and the accompanying stinging was distracting. It felt oddly soothing.
Maybe that was it. Maybe this was what he had been looking for; a distraction; something to stop him from thinking.
With a drowsy half-smile he brought up the knife again.
***
For the whole walk back to the house, it was as if Reno was in a daze. The ninja was almost scared to say anything. They were walking side by side, so she could easily make out the emotions flittering over his features. Something heavy welled up in her stomach. It was not pity, she could not quite place it yet. He refused to look up, apparently very interested in the ground they were walking on.
Yuffie could not begin to guess what he was thinking about. Perhaps memories of the Sector 7 Pillar? The others had told her little about it and what she had heard was disturbing enough. She was not sure she wanted to know everything there was to know.
"Reno..." She tentatively addressed him.
-"What?" He looked at her sharply, aqua-eyes suddenly devoid of anything, cold and guarded.
She almost hit him round the head then and there. This wall he had built since their last encounter was irritating her to no end. Instead, she opted to walk the steps up to her house in silence, giving her time to control her temper. That was when she remembered that he had taken the keys.
"You okay, Turkey?" She asked after taking a deep breath and turned around in a sort of twirl. It was a useless attempt to hide how uncomfortable she was.
"Sure, yo." He unlocked the door, walking in without at all bothering with her. "Why shouldn't I be?"
Rolling her eyes, Yuffie went to the little kitchen, looking over the fruits she kept there. Out of the corner of her eyes, she watched him head for the stairs.
"I'mma go to bed, brat. See ya in the morning." He told her, voice still monotonous.
When he was out of sight, the ninja grabbed an apple, turning it over in her hand thoughtfully. Perhaps she should go to her room too. It was not like there was much to do anyways.
Taking a bite of her fruit she followed him upstairs, pushing her own door open. She plopped down on the bed, still deep in thought. It was beyond awkward with the Turk around. Ex-Turk, she mentally corrected herself and lay back on the mattress.
She had tried talking to him, more out of curiosity than real concern. Nonetheless she realised that she should have taken this more seriously. Finishing her apple, she chucked the remains out the window behind her. Tomorrow she would figure something out. She wanted to enjoy what was left of her vacation.
Outside, she heard footsteps. What was he up to now? She kept quiet, listening as he descended the stairs again. Frowning, the ninja slipped out of the door, just as the front door slammed shut. She cringed. Perhaps she should follow him. After all, he did seem kind of off.
Quickly, she returned to her room, to change out of her beach-attire, before creeping outside. She dashed outside, catching only a glimpse of red hair around the corner. Slowing her stride, she slowly sneaked after him. Might as well try to improve her ninja skills, she decided.
She followed him in the shadows as he made his way into a bar, apparently not noticing the ninja behind him. Yuffie grinned. So far, so good. Strolling up casually towards the entrance, she flashed her ID at the bouncer. That little card just made her day.
The burly man gave her a disapproving look, but let her through. Apparently some people just did not appreciate cheerfulness.
Inside, she spotted the redhead take a seat at the counter, shoulders slumped, head hanging.
She had planned on walking up to him and telling him off for leaving the house without her. After all, he was her bodyguard. However, at the sight of him, she stopped in her tracks. He looked like he really wanted to be alone and who was she to intrude?
Still, she could not make herself leave. She was still struggling to figure out the ex-Turk and perhaps a drink was just what she needed. So, she slipped into an empty booth by the door, continuing to watch her bodyguard as he threw back a shot of something she did not even want to know. Someone was apparently trying to get drunk, she thought, cocking an eyebrow.
"Hey, sweetheart! You need anything?" A skinny guy appeared out of nowhere, his black shirt a few sizes too big. Jolted out of her contemplation, the ninja stared at him for a moment. He could not have been much older than her and maybe even good-looking if you liked the geeky type. He was still smiling expectantly. Then it dawned on her. She had completely forgotten! She could legally buy alcohol now! A devious smile appeared on her face.
"Uh...you got a Wutai Sunrise?" Yuffie asked, deliberately trying to sound indifferent and as if she did this everyday.
"For you? Sure!" With that he left and she all but sighed in relief at being alone with her thoughts again.
She went back to watching Reno sit at the bar. That must be how he was feeling too. He did not talk, did not even move, and just kept staring into his second drink that he must have ordered when she had not been looking. On the other hand, too much brooding could not be good either. She thought of Vincent and Cloud again and mentally cringed. Perhaps she should go over there and talk to him?
"There ya go." The waiter had come back, placing the cocktail on her table.
"Uh, thanks." She eagerly took a sip of her first legal drink. It was cold, and just like she liked it, all different flavours mixing together. Yet, she was still occupied with observing the Turk at the bar. Which was why it took her a few more sips until she realised that something about the cocktail was off. It seemed slightly salty.
Wrinkling her brow, she tried it again, trying to identify the taste. It was nothing she knew and a little odd.
As if on cue, the waiter came back and suddenly sat down across from her.
"So, what's the big deal about you?" He asked, leaning back in his seat. That was the first time Yuffie took a good look at him. She had been so distracted; she had not noticed that he looked more like a guest than an employee.
"You're not a waiter are ya?" She blurted, feeling warmth creeping up her cheeks. She was not sure whether it was embarrassment or something else. It could not be the drink, could it?
"No, but I didn't mind getting this for you, sugar." He smiled and for some reason she felt the need to giggle at his words. When he lifted his glass, she did too and they both took a deep gulp.
"You haven't answered my question."
-"Hu?" Yuffie tried to think past the buzz she was feeling already but took yet another swallow. She could not remember reacting this fast at Tifa's. Her first drink was not even completely finished.
"What's a girl like you, doing in a bar like this?" He asked with a big grin and the cliché was making her burst into laughter.
"Shiva! You just sounded like these guys in the films!" She gasped between giggles, the hilarity too much for her fuzzy brain to handle. Her gut feeling was screaming at her that something was going on, but she could not seem to focus.
"Really? So what happens again after that in the films?" He leaned closer, dangerously close and Yuffie had the urge to get away, only that her body would not listen and for lack of something else to do, she took another drink from her glass. She blinked afterwards, trying to clear her doubling vision.
He simply grinned wider and grabbed her arm, pulling her closer and leaning in. She barely registered it. Then his eyes found something behind her and he froze.
"Usually the guys get their arses kicked by the hero." An all too familiar voice drawled.
Yuffie took a while to note that the grin on the non-waiter's face had turned into a scowl. She wondered what he was glaring at before turning and finding Reno standing there, a more than pissed off look in his aquamarine eyes.
"Because none are around, I'll just have to do, yo." He stated, never taking his eyes off the other man.
"Turkey!" The ninja squealed in shock.
He did not react, simply kept glaring at the other occupant of the booth. "What did you give her?" Roofies*?"
Yuffie frowned. What was he talking about?
"'S alright, Turkey... he jus' got me a Wutai Sunrise." She slurred, wondering why the room was starting to spin.
The redhead still did not spare her a glance and it irked her that he would not look at her.
"Hey, man. Sorry, I didn't know she's your girlfriend! I'll..." The guy suddenly got up, his moves too fast for her blurry eyes to follow.
-"What did you give her?" Reno repeated, each word clipped with a warning. Had she not been this out of it, she would have noticed how the other guy flinched as the redhead took a step closer.
The guy mumbled an answer at the same time Yuffie had decided that she had had enough of being ignored.
"You gave her liquid X?! Are you freakin' nuts?" The Turk was about to advance on the guy, when he had to quickly reach out to grab the drugged ninja before she toppled to the floor in her attempt to get up.
"S'rry, Room's spinnin'" The girl mumbled as she leant heavily against his front.
The stranger used that moment of distraction to take off towards the back door.
Reno watched his escape warily, but just secured his grip on Yuffie's slight frame. "Let's get out of here."
°°°TBC°°°
*Roofies or flunitrazepam, also known as Rohypnol is a real date rape drug. I actually researched XD
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