Title: Serenade
Date: 10-30-06
Disclaimer: Still don't own PoT. Still don't own the characters.
Atobe knew that, as a captain, it was his responsibility to nurture and care for his team members. Even so, there were some things even his generous soul could not put up with for very long, and Shishido's caterwauling was one of them.
What was worse was that the scruffy dash specialist knew it annoyed him and that was probably why he persisted in singing in the showers every single day after practice. Atobe had tried to get him to stop, had, in fact, said in no uncertain terms that if Shishido did not stop his yodeling there would be dire consequences. It wasn't as if they were even proper songs, he had pointed out. Rap, in Atobe's mind, was something invented by the dregs of society because they had failed to grasp the true purpose of music—one, that it should be enjoyable, and two, that there should actually be notes. Toneless rhythmic chanting was for unsophisticated people who have never heard of Mozart or Bach or any number of composers who wrote actual music. It spoke of commoners and vagabonds and Shishido, as a student at Hyoutei, should avoid being associated with these peoples.
Shishido had replied, in no uncertain terms, that Atobe could go screw off. After this incident, he sang louder.
"Shishido, if you do not desist in this assault on Ore-sama's ears, Ore-sama will go to any lengths to have you expelled!"
"—sono puraido… geki-dasa daze!" Shishido yelled in response. Atobe was beginning to think that he made it all up as he went along.
The rest of the regulars winced at the increase in volume. Owing to the fact that Shishido took unusually long showers, the group was exposed to Shishido's "singing" daily for as long as they could stand it, dressing as quickly as possible before throwing their things into their bags and scuttling out of the club-room with their hands over their ears. Even Jiroh had trouble ignoring it, and usually he could sleep through a typhoon.
Atobe didn't want to expel Shishido. The boy was a decent tennis player and a pretty good doubles player, something his team was rather lacking in considering all the resident divas. Also, with Shishido out of school and therefore off the team, he would either have to replace him with one of the many, mediocre ranks of Hyoutei… or he would have to let Taki back on the team. Taki was almost worse than Shishido; he might not cause the team to go partially deaf every day, but he employed about six different vile-smelling chemical sprays to keep his hair shiny and "healthy," as he put it. In Atobe's opinion Taki's hair was possibly the most toxic substance in a fifty mile radius, which included the sewage treatment plant and the nuclear power plant. Atobe did not enjoy leaving practice every day with bloodshot, watery eyes and smelling like a sewer.
Nevertheless, if Shishido did not stop that racket soon, Atobe was likely to kill him. Or have Kabaji do it for him. At any rate, a dead Shishido would cause problems for them all, and so needed to be avoided at all costs, and yet it was getting more and more difficult to dismiss the idea.
Atobe was not the only one who was thinking along these lines.
"That's IT! I can't stand it anymore!"
About to call for the gigantic second year that followed him everywhere, Atobe paused as Gakuto stomped off in the direction of the showers, holding the very spiky hairbrush he had been using to untangle his hair and wearing a look that proclaimed that righteous vengeance would be done.
All activity in the clubroom paused as the regulars waited with baited breath. Fifteen seconds passed before the horrendous singing suddenly stopped, a startled yell rent the air, and Gakuto came back, smirking.
"Come on, Yuushi," the redhead said, picking up his bag and pulling the tensai out the door with him, "I need to buy a new hairbrush."
A/N: If you don't recognize the lyrics, the song Shishido is singing is "Geki-Dasa Daze!" from his album Zero. For the record, I actually love this song, partially because the idea of Shishido rapping is just amusing to me. Somehow, though, I doubt that Atobe would approve…