Chapter 8: Shadow Games
Groudon and Kyogre were standing in line at the Kecleon Brothers' shop in Treasure Town. The weather was cloudy and it was slightly drizzling, much to the irritation of the shoppers.
Groudon checked the treasure bag's money pouch. He groaned as he realized that he only had about 2,000 Poké. He fingered the pecha scarf he was wearing around his neck. The only thing on his mind was the expedition. He grinned as he looked forward to adventure and possibly meeting new girls. He was so focused on his daydream that he failed to notice that the line had moved up quite a bit.
Suddenly, Kyogre shoved him hard from behind. "Hey, move it!" she snapped. Kyogre was wearing a bright red cloth band cinched around the blue silk that she was wearing as a scarf.
"What was that for?" Groudon snapped as he staggered from the blow.
"That was for getting us reamed out by Chatot and causing us to miss dinner yesterday and breakfast for today!"
"How's that my fault?"
Kyogre rolled her eyes. Groudon could be rather dense even if he was kind of lovable. "You ate the fucking treasure we were supposed to bring back to Chatot!" she shouted. Her stomach still ached from missing dinner yesterday and breakfast today; the baked apples she and Groudon bought at Spinda's café were simply not filling enough.
Groudon chuckled nervously. Yes, the perfect apples they had gathered from Apple Woods were intended for Guildmaster Wigglytuff. No, he was not able to resist shoving them down his throat. He was embarrassed to admit it but he actually described the apples as "orgasmic" – in front of the entire guild. While everyone else found it uproariously funny – even the normally stolid Kyogre cracked a smile; Chatot was utterly enraged. He proceeded to deny the two dinner and then yell at them using some…choice words.
"You two, move it!" a Tauros shouted.
"Shut up!" Kyogre snapped.
Groudon shook his head and grabbed Kyogre by the blue silk she was wearing and proceeded to drag her forward, using the blue silk as a leash. "Ky, do you have to argue with everyone?" he asked.
"Let go of my blue silk! And don't call me Ky!"
Groudon facepalmed with his free hand. He knew that Kyogre was rather volatile but she seemed to be even worse recently. He suspected it was the result of missing dinner and breakfast. "I'll stop calling you 'Ky' once you stop trying to argue with everyone," he said.
Several of the shoppers stared at them. By now, most of Treasure Town's inhabitants had gotten accustomed to the presence of the two Legends and treated them like any other Pokémon, right down to insulting or cursing at the two.
When the two Legends arrived in front of the Kecleon brothers, Groudon let go of Kyogre, much to her relief.
"Welcome to our shop!" they said in near perfect unison.
"What will it be?" the green Kecleon asked.
Groudon looked over at the well stocked shelves. "I'll take a reviver seed, an apple and an oran berry, a bag of dried fruit and a pecha berry," he said.
The green Kecleon – named Cam – retrieved the items and tallied up the total cost. "That will be 950 Poké," Cam said.
Groudon said nothing as he fished out the coins and handed them over to Cam. He then placed the goods inside his treasure bag. He thought about grabbing a TM from Electivire for either himself or Kyogre. He headed over to the next shop and stood in line. The shopkeeper, a purple Kecleon was helping a Machamp choose some orbs for an upcoming mission. After a few minutes, the Machamp walked away with a shiny new orb.
"Welcome to Kecleon's Orb Emporium," the purple Kecleon said as Groudon stepped up to the counter.
"I'll take an escape orb and a petrify orb," Groudon said, fishing for the cash in his treasure bag.
The purple Kecleon – who was named Leon – retrieved the two orbs and tallied up the costs. "300 Poké," he said.
Groudon paid for the orbs and shoved them into his bag. "Hey Ky, I think the guild's ready to leave," he said. He got no response. "Ky, did you hear me?"
He then turned around and spotted Kyogre arguing with a Bellsprout who had bumped into her. He sighed, grabbed hold of her blue silk and dragged her away from the crowd.
After several minutes, they made their way to the front of the guild. There, almost every member of the guild was gathered along with the supplies.
"Are we going on the expedition?" Groudon asked.
Chatot frowned. "I shouldn't be letting you two come after what you two did with the perfect apples," he said. "But Guildmaster says I have to let you come along."
Groudon grinned. His thirst for adventure would be quenched!
"Hey, hey! Now we can get going!" Corphish said. He, like all the other trainees were carrying their treasure bags.
"And Groudon, you're going to be carrying some of our supplies along with Breaker," Chatot said.
Groudon handed his treasure bag to Kyogre and stepped over a large pile of sticks and cloth. He groaned as Querc and Loudred began tying the tents to his body. Breaker was carrying the food and some supplies as well.
"Normally, we would have hired Tauros or Donphan porters," Querc said, finishing the last knot.
Groudon said nothing even though inwardly he wanted to yell at Wigglytuff for being a cheap bastard. "Fine, let's get moving then," he grumbled.
"All right, move out!" Chatot barked.
The group – led by Wigglytuff and Chatot – headed down the path that would lead them out of Treasure Town. The mid afternoon sun shone brightly over the guild's entrance as Scriptor, Diglett, Dugtrio and Croagunk watched them depart.
Scriptor sighed as he mentally tallied up yet another expedition that he was not chosen for. He felt a twinge of resentment at seeing the two new guild trainees get picked. Granted, they were Legendaries but Arceus herself had announced to the entire guild that these two were to be treated like ordinary pokémon.
"Something the matter Scriptor?" Diglett asked.
"Nothing, just a little upset that I got passed over for an expedition, again," Scriptor replied. No matter how hard he tried to deny it, there was a legitimate reason that Scriptor was given an administrative job; he was a terrible fighter. He was even excluded in the traditional "graduation battle" and relegated to being a watcher.
Latios was in his bedroom reading one of Groudon's dirty magazines and eating some chips. He had removed the diaper from his plushie and placed it in Lugia's room, which was empty, thanks to a week long art tour that Lugia and Palkia had embarked on.
He heard a knocking on his door and he telekinetically opened it to reveal Latias floating there. "Latias, isn't it past your bedtime?" he asked, sliding the magazine under the bed.
"Latios…I…I have something to give you," she said, placing the box on the bed.
Latios telekinetically prodded the box. "What's in it?" he asked.
Latias grinned. "Open it and find out," she said.
Latios gulped. He was afraid to open it, fearing he might find a diaper, a baby bottle or some other baby paraphernalia. He looked at his sister who looked back at him with pleading eyes.
He sighed and opened the box. To his surprise, the box contained a blue aviator scarf and a set of aviator's goggles. "Um, Latias, what are these for?" he asked.
Latias looked crestfallen and her wings appeared to droop. "You don't like them?" she asked.
"No, no. I love them and I appreciate the gesture but it's just…" he trailed off.
"I thought you would look good in one of those scarves that the pilots from the old days wore. Well, and I have a red scarf and a similar set of goggles so I thought we should match,"
Latios sighed. "Look, I appreciate your fashion sense but couldn't you have just gotten the scarves? I mean, we're natural flyers who fly at high speeds. The goggles do nothing for us," he said. He then pulled his sister into an affectionate embrace.
Latias nuzzled her brother's shoulder and cooed softly. "Does that mean you forgive me?" she asked.
Latios nuzzled his sister's neck. "Yes, I forgive you but don't ever do anything like that again without asking me," he replied.
"I won't," Latias said, failing to stifle a huge yawn. "I'm going to bed now, good night."
Latias headed out of the room as Latios placed the lid on the box, telekinetically levitated it over to the dresser, telekinetically turned the lights out and pulled the blanket over himself.
Meanwhile, the helicopter that Zero and his two guards were riding in touched down in a large military-style base somewhere on the outskirts of Sinnoh. Several metal halide lights illuminated the airfield. A group of slowly blinking red lights illuminated the runways and the helipad.
As the engine died down, Zero and the two guards disembarked.
Several guards armed with shotguns and rifles prowled the airfield and hangars.
"Zero, come with us," one of the shotgun toting guards said.
Zero complied. Not that he had much choice. Before he was led away, he managed to catch a glimpse of the contents inside one of the hangars. He did a double take as he realized it was his prized airship, the Megarig.
He was then led to an office building where more armed guards waited.
They motioned for him to sit on a rather decrepit looking wood bench with even worse looking cloth cushions. A single wooden door with bearing a brass nameplate that read "Cyrus Akagi" was on the wall opposite the entrance.
Zero did so. He could not help but notice that the guards carried not only poké balls but firearms. He pondered what was going on, what had happened to him and what was going to happen to him.
Suddenly, the wooden door clicked open, revealing a man sitting in a swivel chair with his back facing towards the door. An uncomfortable looking wooden chair sat in front of the desk
"Come in," the man said.
Zero shivered; something about that man's voice that terrified him. Perhaps it was the eerie lack of inflection and emotion.
He entered the dimly lit room.
"Have a seat," the man said. The manner in which he spoke was not an offer but a demand.
Zero took a seat in the wooden chair and the man in the swivel chair faced him. The man in the swivel chair was young – in his late twenties at most – and wore black pants with a grey vest. His most striking feature was not his electric blue hair but his face, which was about as expressive as a cinderblock wall.
"Well, Zero Nuell. I have heard about you and your attempts to capture Giratina and conquer the Reverse World. And I applaud that. Our organization could use a man like you," the man said.
"Pardon me sir, but may I have your name?" Zero asked. He was trying his best to hide his fear.
"Very well, I am Cyrus Akagi. Perhaps you have met my other recruits?"
"Erm…n…no."
Cyrus groaned. "Never mind then, you'll meet them in a few hours," he said. "Dismissed."
The two guards flanking the door escorted Zero out of the room.
Cyrus looked at the pile of papers on his desk and grinned. Soon, the Legendaries would his to command.
Zero was dropped off at the barracks. He noticed that his Giratina-esque costume was hanging from a coat hook but he was too tired to care about that. He flopped down on the bed and fell asleep, not even bothering to take his shoes off. He grinned as he dreamed about lording over the Reverse World.
A few hours later, a loud siren pierced the early morning air. "Arceus-damn it, what time is it?" Zero muttered. He buried his head under the pillow.
He had no time to ponder such things as he was almost literally dragged out of bed. "Move it, you Caterpie!" a harsh voice shouted at him.
Zero rubbed his eyes and got a look at the shouter. It was a burly man dressed in a jumpsuit that bore a startling resemblance to a spacesuit. The barracks were lit with the harsh blue-white light of powerful LEDs. Zero groaned and looked out the window. It was still dark.
"Are you going to sit around like a Kakuna! Move your ass!" the man shouted, shoving Zero.
Zero groaned and grabbed his Giratina outfit. He hated the orange prison jumpsuit but he did not want to strip in front of a hulking man who could pass for a Machoke. He draped the outfit over his shoulder and followed the man out to the airfield.
When he did so, he was met by the sound of aircraft engines revving up and the sight of several grunts boarding helicopters and blimps. A tug pulled the Megarig out of the hangar. Another tug pulled an enormous disc shaped airship out of another hangar.
Zero bolted towards the Megarig. Not watching where he was going, he ran into another man. Both of them ended up on the ground.
Zero got back to his feet and continued towards his airship. "Sorry about that!" he called.
The man he had knocked down was Lawrence III, owner of the Hikokyu II, one of the few Jirarudan-class airships in existence. His original airship, the Hikokyu, was destroyed by Lugia in the Shamouti Islands.
Lawrence III shrugged as he dusted himself off and headed to the Hikokyu II, which was sitting on the airfield.
Zero entered the flight deck of the Megarig and started up the ship's reactor. Almost immediately, the avatar of the ship's AI appeared on the view screen. Infi, as the AI was affectionately called, took the form of an indigo haired young woman wearing a dress emblazoned with the infinity symbol and her hair done up with a ribbon, also in the shape of the infinity symbol.
"Infi, initiate take off sequence," Zero said as he checked the status of the ship's life support systems.
"As you wish," Infi said. Her voice was cool and electronic but at the same time enticingly feminine. A symphony of beeps played across the control panel as she routed power to the various antigravity pods placed around the airship.
Zero got up and headed to the bathroom to change into his Giratina outfit.
A few minutes later, dressed in his trademark outfit, he took his place at the pilot's seat. He looked out through the windshield when his radio crackled.
"Zero! Open a portal to the Hall of Origins!" Cyrus ordered through the radio.
Zero looked at the console and noticed that all the systems were powered up. He pressed several buttons and the ship silently rose into the air. He powered up the dimensional rift generator, waited for it to fully charge and fired the purple-blue beam into the sky above the base. Almost immediately, a swirling blue portal appeared in the sky.
"Portal opened, Zero out," Zero said into the radio. Almost immediately, Ride of the Valkyries came blasting through.
He maneuvered his airship through the portal. The rest of the fleet followed.
Cyrus looked at the departing fleet from his office. His previous plan had been thwarted by vigilante pokémon trainers. But now, he realized his mistake; he did not have the proper equipment and people trained to utilize them.
He lit a cigarette, took a deep draw and blew out a smoke ring. He grinned; Operation Red Dawn was well underway.
When the fleet traveled through the portal, they spotted the Hall of Origins. It was large manor that rested on a floating continent, seemingly above an infinite sea of clouds.
Lawrence III examined the land mass via his radar screen. He was not seated at the main flight deck of the airship but at the radar/gunnery station. He tried hard to block out the strains of Ride of the Valkyries blasting through the radio. His ship, the Hikokyu II had an AI as well, which was now piloting the ship, but unlike the AI on the Megarig, it was genderless.
The Hikokyu II had been designated as the command and supply ship thanks to its massive size. He did not fear attack as his airship was heavily armed and armored as well.
Its weapons included a ventral cannon that was capable of firing fireballs or ice balls, an electrical shunt system that can sap power from an Electric-type pokémon or machines, an electrical ring capture system powerful enough to trap and lift a small ship, several anti-air missile batteries scattered on the top of the airship and last but not least, the capability to carry nearly forty tons of bombs.
"Lawrence, have you spotted the Hall of Origins yet?" Cyrus demanded over the radio.
"Cyrus, this Lawrence, I have a visual on the hall," Lawrence replied.
"Drop the stun bombs."
Lawrence pressed a button on the gunner's console, releasing the entire payload of stun bombs. The stun bombs were small aerodynamic bombs that emitted a powerful stun field in a radius of about ten meters when they were detonated. The field was capable of instantly knocking out pokémon, no matter how powerful they were. The only drawback was that the stun field was capable of causing deadly arrhythmias and brain damage or even death in humans.
He opened one of the armored shutters in the gunnery station and noticed that the blimps were also bombing the Hall of Origins. He closed the armored shutters, thankful that he was not the only bomber pilot.
Mew was sleeping when he heard something explode outside his bedroom. He floated up and noticed the landscape pocked with glowing blue spheres. He scratched his head when one of the stun bombs crashed through his bedroom. His heart jumped into his throat and he felt something wet running down his legs. To his surprise, the bomb failed to detonate; this one was a dud.
More explosions rocked the bedroom as more stun bombs exploded.
Mew decided not to take his chances and he bolted out the door, not caring that he had urinated on himself out of fear. Another stun bomb crashed into the ruined rec room and detonated.
Elsewhere in the Hall of Origins, the Legendaries had been awoken by the relentless bombardment. Arceus was herding the Legends who were still conscious – Mew, Entei, Azelf, Deoxys, Latias, Latios, Jirachi, Celebi and herself – to the basement.
"I think that's everyone we can find," Arceus said, telekinetically bolting the door shut.
"Great so what do we do, fight back?" Dexoys asked, as she switched into her Attack Forme.
"We have no choice!" Entei roared.
"But we'll get captured! There's too many!" Jirachi said.
Latios grabbed his Lati-themed cell phone and hastily dialed Lugia. His heart pounded as he tried to get through to him. "Lugia, the Hall of Origins is under attack! Get-"
The phone call was cut off as a bunker buster-type stun bomb crashed into the basement and detonated, plunging all the Legendaries into unconsciousness.
Lugia and Palkia were staying at a nice hotel somewhere in Lilycove City. It was nighttime and both of them were asleep.
Suddenly, the distinct ringtone of Lugia's cell phone echoed through the still hotel room. The ringtone was an imitation of his song but played on a synthesizer.
Palkia groaned as he got up out of bed. He had shrunken himself down from his usual height of thirteen feet down to six or so feet so he could fit into buildings without wrecking them. Lugia had done the same, but Lugia chose to use a height of 5'8".
He looked at Lugia, who was sound asleep and completely oblivious to his cell phone. Palkia groaned; Lugia could sleep through anything, up to and including someone lighting a campfire in his bedroom. "Hey, Lugia, wake up!" he whispered.
Lugia mumbled something about poffins then rolled over on his back.
Palkia then got a coat hanger and prodded Lugia multiple times with it. "Wake up, damn it!" he yelled.
Lugia groaned as he felt someone poking him. He reached over and turned on the lights to reveal that Palkia was jabbing him with a coat hanger. He swore and telekinetically snatched the coat hanger and threw it onto the couch. "What is your problem!" he snapped.
"Your phone!" Palkia replied, thrusting the still ringing phone into Lugia's face.
Lugia grabbed the phone and sat up in bed, making sure to cover himself with the blanket. He winced as he heard a squish, reminding him of the fact that he was diapered and wet; it was the same situation every night. But at the same time, he was glad that he was wearing a diaper; a wet bed would be mighty hard to explain to the housekeeping staff, especially if the bed wetter was a Legendary.
"You have one message from Latios," the automated voice mailbox said.
Lugia pressed a button to access the message.
"'Lugia, the Hall of Origins is under attack! Get-'" The rest of the message was unintelligible screams. "End of message."
Lugia gulped; who or what could have done this? He then turned to Palkia. "Palkia, we're in deep, deep, deep shit," he said.
"Arceus mad at us again?" Palkia asked. He was munching on the complementary granola bar.
"Far, far, far worse. The Hall of Origins has been attacked and it sounds like there are no survivors."
Palkia inhaled his granola bar, setting off a coughing fit. "What. The. Fuck?" he said.
Lugia nodded. "It's true; we'll need to think of a plan," he said.
"There's no protocol for this, is there?"
Lugia shook his head.
Palkia sighed. "Figures," he mumbled.
"Look, I've got a plan," Lugia said.
"Good, what is it?"
"I'll tell you once I get out of bed."
Lugia groaned as he realized that exiling Palkia to the hallway or bathroom was not an option. He did not want Palkia to see him in a clean diaper, let alone a used one but he had no choice as this was an emergency. He then threw the blankets off himself and got out of bed, revealing what he was wearing: a very saggy and very wet diaper.
"The first step is to-" Lugia began. He was interrupted by the sound of his diaper falling off his body and onto the floor with a loud plop.
"I think the first step is to get a clean diaper on you," Palkia said between giggles. No matter how many times he saw Lugia in a diaper (especially the ones with the "cute" designs), it was still uproariously funny.
Lugia gave Palkia an icy glare – as icy as possible considering that his face was as red as a tamato berry. "Palkia, if you find the idea of me wearing a diaper funny, please keep it to yourself. I already get all the teasing I can handle from Shaymin, Jirachi, Mew and Suicune," he said. It was true. Shaymin routinely called him "Baby Lugia", "Diaper Lugia" or worst of all "Leaky Lugia"; Jirachi and Mew never passed up the opportunity to bring up his diapers and bedwetting at various situations just to humiliate him; Suicune constantly berated him for wearing diapers. And of course, he just wished he could stop wetting the bed but there was nothing that any of the other Legendaries could do to fix that problem, so it was diapers for him.
"Sorry," Palkia said. He stifled a giggle. He knew it was wrong to laugh at Lugia for a medical problem but he just could not resist laughing at the idea of a diapered Legendary.
Lugia picked up the diaper, threw it in the trash can and headed off to the bathroom to clean up. He was still slightly upset at Palkia for laughing at him before.
Palkia shoved his cell phone and its charger into his suitcase, along with the complementary granola bars and poffins. He then zipped up his suitcase and placed it by the room's exit.
Lugia then exited the bathroom. "All right, got everything ready to go?" he asked. He was carrying his tub of baby wipes and a container of baby powder.
Palkia nodded.
"The first step is to meet with our nearest trusted human contact – James Elison, the curator of the Lilycove Art Museum," Lugia said.
"Sounds like a plan," Palkia said, leaning against the wall.
Lugia then dialed James's cell phone. "Hey James, Palkia and I have to discuss something with you. We'll be outside the museum," he said. He then closed the cell phone and stuck it into the suitcase along with the wipes and powder. He looked out the window. It was still dark but the faint golden rays of light in the distance showed that dawn was approaching.
The two Legends then closed the room door and headed to the front desk.
When the two Legends got to the front desk, they immediately returned their keys.
"Leaving so early, Palkia and Lugia? I thought you were going to stay in Lilycove for two days?" the clerk asked.
"We have run into a bit of an-" Palkia said. He was cut off by Lugia who jabbed an elbow into his side.
"He means to say that we have a scheduling conflict," Lugia said, cutting Palkia off.
"Well you two have a nice trip!" the clerk said.
The two Legends headed out through the hotel's sliding doors.
Luckily, the hotel was very close to the art museum. The concrete canyons of Lilycove were still dark as the sun was still low on the horizon. The orange glow of the streetlights did nothing to dispel the darkness of the city. Palkia sat down on a concrete planter while Lugia leaned against a concrete bollard designed to prevent vehicles from driving into the museum. Lugia looked around. There was no one around, except maybe some people he assumed were homeless. A few street cleaning vehicles rumbled by.
Palkia sighed. A new and epic adventure was thrust upon them. The fate of the other Legendaries, perhaps the entire world was in their hands.