It's been a few weeks since Shepard returned to the Normandy. Alyssa was still in the medical bay, but Chakwas approved Gavin to be stable enough to be taken around the ship.
Most of the time that he was out of his crib, he was with Joker up in the cockpit. Joker would cradle him in one arm while performing his pilot duties with the other. He cooed and stared at everything. Every now and then Joker would look down at his son, and smile. He would tap his nose, which made Gavin blink, or he would kiss him on the forehead while he slept. Sometimes the crew would come up to the cockpit to say hello to him. Most of the time it was Shepard that was up there with him and the baby.
"Hey Joker, I need you to take us back to Illium. Liara is going to join us this time around," she said, walking up to the cockpit.
"Gotcha."
Shepard instinctively took Gavin from Joker's arms, and played with him. She talked in a high pitched voice to him, which made Joker laugh hysterically.
"What are you laughing at?"
"You don't talk to other people like that. I've never seen you like this before."
"He's a baby! Babies love this kind of stuff."
"Uh, I think you forgot, Shepard. He has my genes, so chances are that he's laughing too."
"Thanks for being a jerk."
Shepard walked around Joker's chair and played around with Gavin, making more of those high pitched noises and making Joker laugh.
"When you get older, you can call me auntie! And I am going to spoil you like there's no tomorrow. When your parents treat you bad, just come to Auntie Emi and I'll take care of everything." Joker shook his head.
"You're impossible sometimes. We're about an hour away from Illium."
"Thanks Joker."
Shepard turned and handed Gavin back to Joker before heading up to her cabin to change.
Gavin was cooing again in his lap as he smoothly brought the Normandy in for arrival in Nos Astra. Once the Normandy was docked, he left the cockpit to take Gavin back to Alyssa. As much as he loved having Gavin with him, he knew he needs time with her, too, even though she is still in a comatose state. When the elevator doors hissed open, he was greeted by most of the engineering crew, Tali, Kasumi, and Miranda. He gave a nod as he walked through the medical bay doors and straight to Alyssa's make-shift room. He laid Gavin in his crib, then walked over to Alyssa's side and kissed her forehead.
"Hey sweetie," he said, taking her hand into his. He stared at her and let out a long sigh. He wished at this very moment, she would open her eyes and say hello to him. It's only been a few days but it seemed like months or years to Joker. He realized how lonely he was without her there by his side. He stared at every feature of hers: her long hair that Chakwas pulled to the side, her eyes (even though they were closed, Joker could imagine what her eyes look like), her cute little nose, and her smile. Her skin was still as soft as before, her chest lightly rising up and down with every artificial breath. He wanted to picture here lying there, looking at him and smiling, but he couldn't help but stare at the breathing tube that stuck out from her mouth and connected to a hole in the wall just to the side of her bed. There was a small monitor right above her, updating in real time her vitals. Chakwas also programmed to her omni tool an update of Alyssa's status, so if anything seemed skewed, she could get back to the medical bay right away. Joker pulled up a stool from Chakwas' desk, and sat next to Alyssa, still holding her hand.
"I hope you've been okay. Chakwas hasn't called me down here so I'm guessing everything is going well. She said she cannot tell if you'll be like this for a long time, or if you'll be like this for the rest of your life."
His voice choked at those last words.
He looked down at his hands that were holding hers. He could feel no movement from her, but her hands were still warm and soft. He sighed again as he rested his head on her bed, looking down at his feet.
"Why does all the bad shit have to happen to you? I almost lost you on the Collector Base, and I don't know what's going to happen to you now…"
He held onto her hand a bit tighter. Thoughts of anger and pain surged through his body.
"I just wish it would have happened to me and not you."
He looked over to Gavin, who was peacefully sleeping in his crib.
"You know, besides all this crap that's been happening, I'm so happy that you fell in love with me, and that I fell in love with you. Before I met you, I totally thought I'd stay single forever. I thought all women were the same, and no one would look past my Vrolik's, but you did, and I'm thankful for that. And you're one hell of a woman to put up with my shenanigans.. besides Shepard." Joker laughed as he smiled at the sleeping Alyssa.
"I have to head back now, baby. I'll come back down tonight if I can." Joker stood up and kissed her forehead again.
"I love you." He went over to Gavin's crib and kissed his forehead before walking out of the medical bay.
The mess hall was quiet now, only Kasumi was left. She was sitting at the table, staring at her glass of water.
"I don't think you're going to make that glass levitate anytime soon."
"A girl can dream, right?" she said, looking up at the pilot.
"Why are you still down here?"
"Just wanted some time alone. There's a lot of things on my mind.
"Like? Fill me in on the drama of the Normandy." Joker walked over and sat across from Kasumi.
"Well for starters Gabby and Ken are doing their usual bickering. I think they're getting the hint though, that they should get together soon. Jack and Miranda are still being Jack and Miranda. Thane is still doing good with Shepard. Nothing really exciting, except.."
She stared at her glass of water before taking in a long breath.
"I don't know what's going on between me and Jacob. I thought he liked me. We went out on a few dates, got along really well, and I thought everything was going just fine. All of a sudden Miranda started butting into everything we do, and now Jacob doesn't seem so into me anymore."
"Sounds like Miranda's being the usual bitch she is. Why so concerned then?"
"The other night I caught them having sex in Miranda's office."
"How did you even get access-"
"Joker, I'm a thief. I can sneak around pretty well. And I wanted to know what was going on. But I found out more than I wanted to know."
"I'm sorry," Joker said, reaching out to grab her hand.
"Wow, Joker, your inner gentleman is actually showing itself."
"Alyssa and Shepard showed me a lot. I'm trying not to be as much as a dick as I used to be. Believe it or not I actually really do care about everyone on this ship. We're all family, you know? And just like with Alyssa and Gavin, I wouldn't want anything to happen to anyone here, for two reasons: this is my home away from home, and I can't really do anything if you all got injured. My bones are too fragile for that kind of stuff." Kasumi laughed, feeling a bit better from earlier.
"Want to have a drink? I think we both deserve one or two."
"Sounds like a plan."
Kasumi and Joker were laughing hysterically at the minibar.
They walked into Kasumi's room, knowing they were going to have at only one or two drinks.
Ten drinks and two hours later, they were laughing at just about anything they talked about.
"When Shepard found out that she was pregnant, she flipped! She said 'This is nothing like I've ever experienced before. How do I deal with a pregnant crew member?" Kasumi laughed out loud.
"May be all the women should get pregnant and see what Shep does!" She said, slapping her knee.
"She would probably kill all the men that were responsible," Joker said, laughing.
"I remember Jacob telling me one night when we were here, he really wanted to start a family, too. But he wanted to wait until we were married before we seriously started trying for a kid." She paused and thought for a moment.
"Actually, that was when Miranda started to get in the middle of things."
"You do know Miranda and Jacob used to date, right? May be he still had the hots for her."
"Yeah, but I don't want to believe that's true. I actually really fell for the guy. I cried after I found them that night."
The ambience of the room suddenly became a bit quieter and a bit more serious.
"I just, feel so alone, you know? After Keiji was murdered, I felt the same exact way, and I hated it. I tried to not think about it by carrying on our work, but it just reminded me of him, and it tore me to pieces. After Cerberus got a hold of me about Shep's mission, I made a promise to Keiji that I would stop sulking around and I'll be happy." Joker listened intently, swaying a bit from the alcohol.
"Then I found Jacob, and it was like falling in love with Keiji all over again. Seeing Miranda with Jacob hurt me just as bad as when I found Keiji with his head cut open and his grey box gone."
A tear rolled down her face, and onto the leather stool.
"I know what alone feels like. I feel like that right now, every time I'm in the cockpit without Alyssa. I've grown so used to having her there with me. It drives me nuts when she's not there. Even though I have Gavin up there with me now, it's still not the same with Alyssa not there." Joker sighed and got up from the bar.
"I should go, I'm getting a little headache."
"Wait! Joker," Kasumi got up, standing in front of him. She looked up at him, and gave him a hug. Surprised, Joker hesitantly returned the hug.
"Thanks for listening."
"Joker! Joker! Wake up!"
Joker's head was throbbing as he rolled over on his bed.
"What's going on?" Garrus crossed his arms over his chest.
"You've been asleep for almost 12 hours, and we're just about ready to leave. Shepard's looking for you. She's feeding Gavin in the medical bay."
Joker slowly got up, rubbing his head, then trudged his way towards the medical bay.
"Hey sleepy head," Shepard said, smiling at her pilot.
"Are we ready to go?"
"Just about. Liara should be on her way, and then we'll be heading to wherever Mordin is at. I haven't read his whole message, but I'll forward you the coordinates once we've taken off."
She took the bottle from Chakwas and began feeding Gavin.
"You know you should be doing this stuff. You are his dad."
"I thought Auntie Emi was going to spoil him." Shepard laughed.
"Touche, Mr. Moreau. Touche."
"I'll be in the cockpit getting ready."