Title: Imperfect Countenance

Author: YaoiGoddessNekoJin

Rating: T

Warnings: Yaoi, Language, Violence, Implied Rape, *Chapter may be triggering to those who have struggled with self-harm*

A/N: Yahoo! Another chapter! I've been spending my free time at work writing for this story, so I am able to concentrate a little more on it. ^-^

Enjoy!

Chapter VII

Kai hadn't been able to sleep since Rei was attacked. He usually spent his nights standing in the kitchen and drinking coffee, which was really only half coffee, the other half being vodka. He usually spent the entire night just thinking. He wanted to go to the hospital to check on Rei and see how he was coping with his injuries. However, Judy had decided that the raven-haired boy could use some time alone to sort his thoughts out before he had to 'put up with visitors' as she put it. Kai, however, didn't like that one bit. Sure, Rei had said that he didn't want to see them the last time they were there, but he didn't know what was best for himself. He was too emotional...too hurt to know what he needed at the moment. Well, at least Kai had time to sort out his own thoughts where the Chinese boy was concerned. For that, he was thankful. Kai wasn't a person who had too much experience with things like emotions. His grandfather had made sure of that. Just then, the sound of the phone ringing brought Kai from his musings. He set down his coffee cup and moved over to answer it.

"Hello?" he spoke, crimson eyes narrowing in annoyance at being interrupted.

"Yes, is this where Rei Kon has been staying?" came a woman's voice. Kai's heart seemed to skip a beat when he noticed the worry and urgency in her voice.

"Yes. Who's this?"

"This is New York-Presbyterian and I'm afraid there's been an incident. Dr. Simmons has requested that you come down to the hospital right away." A flash of panic went through Kai's whole body at the mention that something had happened. The only thing he could do was mumble a quick 'I'll be there.' before rushing around to wake everyone else from their slumber.

x~x~x

They had been waiting in the tiny, sterile room for fifteen minutes already. Everyone was getting more and more agitated as the minutes ticked by. They wanted to know what had happened to Rei. After Kai had woken everybody up from their restless sleep, the suite became a mad house. All five of them were running around, frantically, trying to get dressed so that they could get to the hospital as fast as possible. When they finally arrived, they were told, by a nurse, to sit in a private waiting room until the doctor came to get them. Judy had been the first to take a seat, Max snuggling in right beside her. The boy had been beside himself with worry. Next, Bryan took a seat on a two-person sofa on the opposite side of the room with Tala curled up beside him. Lastly, Kai stood against one of the walls, arms crossed and eyes closed. Finally, after what seemed like hours, the door opened, sound near deafening in the silence of the room, and the doctor walked in, his pristine dress shoes squeaking against the tile of the floor. Everyone sat up straight, full attention focused on Dr. Simmons.

"I'm sorry to bother you all so late." he began. "I'm afraid that Rei is more emotionally fragile and unstable than we had originally thought." Kai's heart seemed to plummet to his stomach and a foreboding chill ran up his spine. "About an hour ago, one of the nurses found Rei in his bathroom. He had smashed the mirror and attempted to take his own life by slitting his wrists." Dr. Simmons said. He paused to give the shocked occupants of the room time to process this information before continuing. "Now, the nurse found Rei just in time. He had lost a lot of blood, but we have him hooked up with a transfusion and he should recover soon. We also have him on suicide watch and have placed him in restraints so that he can't hurt himself again. This will last for a minimum of seventy-two hours, during which time we will have him visited by the hospital's psychologist twice a day. If, at the end of the three day period, Rei has made no improvement, he will be placed in the Psyche Ward until he is able to show that he can function and we feel confident that he will not make another attempt on his life."

By the time that that Dr. Simmons was finished speaking, Max had burst into tears and was being consoled by Judy, who's blue eyes were also shining with tears. The three Russians were stoically waiting to see what was going to happen next, none of their facades betraying what they were really feeling on the inside. Finally, Judy spoke up.

"Can we see him?" she asked, eyes begging the doctor to say yes.

"I guess so. He has been sedated, so he may be asleep."

"Alright, thank you so much." Judy said, turning to the others. "Boys, c'mon." At this, a look of astonishment passed over the faces of Tala, Bryan, and Kai. Bryan was the first to regain his composure and speak.

"You want us to come too?" Judy smiled at the lavender-haired man.

"Of course, why wouldn't I?" Tala was the one to speak this time.

"Because, we're just bodyguards."

"Nope." The three looked at Judy like she was insane. After a moment, she continued. "You're friends."

x~x~x

The small group of people took tentative, quiet steps into the dark hospital room. It broke everyone's heart to see the ghostly-pale Chinese boy laying, lifelessly, on the bed. An IV bag of crimson, red blood was hooked into his thin arm, along with other nutrients and medicines that his body needed. Soft, padded cuffs were around his wrists and ankles, ensuring that he would not be able to move once he awoke. Max was the first to break away from the group. He sat down in a chair at the side of the bed, gently placing one hand over Rei's. The others moved in behind him, Judy taking the space beside her son and the other three leaning against the air conditioning unit on the other side of the bed. Almost as soon as they took their places, a flicker of gold caught Max's attention.

"Look! I think he's waking up!" he exclaimed, tightening his grip on the boy's hand slightly. Everyone watched silently as Rei regained consciousness. After a moment, however, he began struggling against the bonds that were holding him to the bed. His eyes widened in terror when he didn't recognize his surroundings. Rei began to panic only to yelp in pain when he tugged too hard at his wrists. Seeing that Rei wasn't going to calm down, Kai did the first thing that came to mind and pushed himself off the wall and over to the bed. He put his hand on the boy's forehead and gently stroked his hair back, attempting to placate him. Feeling the warmth, Rei settled and turned amber eyes up to meet crimson ones.

"Shh...calm down." Kai murmured. A flush of bright pink spread across the pale cheeks of the raven-haired boy before he shook himself back to reality.

"W-why am I not dead?" he asked in a small voice. Just as Kai was about to answer him, he was shoved out of the way by Tala. The fiery red-head took Kai's place and looked down at Rei. His icy blue eyes were hard with anger and, faster than Rei could blink, Tala drew back his hand and slapped the boy across the face. Rei sat, stunned, for a moment before his anger kicked in.

"What the hell was that for?"

"For being an idiot!" Tala yelled back, just as indignant as the Chinese boy.

"Why do you even care? Wouldn't you be happy if you didn't have to babysit anymore? That's the only you're here...all three of you! Why did you even come to the hospital? Why are you even trying to act like you care?" he yelled at all three Russians, pulling against the bonds holding him down and succeeding in re-opening his wounds. Having had enough of the entire situation, Bryan decided it was his turn to face the outraged boy. Gently moving Tala out of the way, Bryan grabbed Rei's shoulders and shoved him down into the bed. He glared into amber eyes and spoke in a low voice.

"Listen brat, we didn't have to come here. We did because we wanted to. That night that you ran off to pout, neither Tala nor Kai were able to relax, much less sleep. In fact, Kai hasn't slept at all since that night." At this revelation, Rei's eyes widened in shock and Tala and Kai glared at Bryan with anger at being 'sold out.' Before they could respond, however, Bryan continued.

"Trust me, if they didn't if they didn't care, you'd know it. I don't know what you've done to them...us...but you've had an effect that that nobody else has. Stop being so selfish." By the time that the lilac-eyed man had finished speaking, he had to catch his breath and uncurl his fingers from where they had dug into Rei's shoulder. Rei was looking at the opposite wall, past Judy and Max, feeling more miserable and ashamed than ever. He felt the, now-familiar, sting of tears pricking his eyes. He was startled when he felt large hands on his. He looked down and saw said hands fiddling with the restraints. He looked up at Bryan, questioningly.

"You're not going to try anything else, are you?" At the question, Rei shook his head. "Good, because if you do, I'll kill you myself."

Once all of the restraints had been removed and the nurses had come in and changed Rei's bandages, the Chinese boy lie there, exhausted both physically and emotionally. His head was spinning with the information he had learned about his bodyguards. This was...insane... They acted so mean to him. He had convinced himself that, surely that meant they hated him. And, why shouldn't they? He hated himself right now. Rei was pulled from his thoughts as Judy stood up and began to speak.

"Well, Maxie and I are going to head back to the suite now. I think the four of you need to talk some things out so we're going to give you some privacy. C'mon Max." she said, turning to her son in the process. Not wanting to leave Rei so soon, Max groaned, but did as his mother told him.

x~x~x

Almost as soon as Judy and Max had left, Kai, Tala, and Bryan had all turned to Rei, only to find the boy fast asleep. It had been about an hour since then and Rei was beginning to show signs of waking up. The three focused their attention on the boy in front of them.

"Well, it's about time you woke up, princess." Tala said in a snarky manner. When the amber eyes finally opened, Rei scowled the best that he could muster at that moment, only succeeding in making himself look like a pouting child.

"Shove it Tala." he muttered, making the three others smirk. While he was asleep, Kai and Bryan had gotten the chairs from the other side of the bed and placed them opposite their original positions. Tala, as usual, had taken up his spot in Bryan's lap. Kai stood and scooted his chair slightly closer to the bed and let down the bed rail so that his vision would be unimpeded. A slight pink tinged Rei's cheeks as the barrier between them was removed.

How do you feel?" was the only thing that left Kai's mouth as he stared, stoically, at Rei.

"F-fine, I guess." the boy stumbled out, his blush becoming darker by the second. Another moment of stifling silence passed and then Kai did something that shocked everyone in the room. The bluenette took his hand and placed it gently over Rei's, curling his fingers around the petite appendage. After getting over his initial shock, Bryan stood from his chair, nearly dumping Tala into the floor in the process, and grabbed his lover's arm, leading him from the room. Once the door had closed with a soft 'click,' Kai turned his eyes back to Rei.

"I'm sorry." Rei's golden eyes widened slightly and they made contact with Kai's scarlet, red ones.

"W-what?" the raven-haired boy asked in astonishment.

"If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have been attacked." Rei tried to cut him off, but Kai just continued. "I'm not a person that gets scared easily. After all, most emotions are weaknesses. But, I was scared, Rei. I was scared because, suddenly, everything that I had been worried about became obsolete...seemed so trivial. The only thing I could think about was that you could die and it would be my fault. I hurt you because I was being a selfish idiot. Rei, if you had succeeded tonight, I never would have forgiven myself. Hell, I probably still won't forgive myself for hurting you. I'm sorry." By the time Kai was finished with his speech, Rei was sniffling, crystal tears running down his cheeks. Seeing this, Kai raised the hand that wasn't holding Rei's and used his thumb to gently wipe the tears from his cheeks, as if he were a fragile, porcelain doll that he feared breaking. Rei brought his free hand up, placing it over the one on his face.

"Kai." he tried speaking, only for his voice to crack. He cleared his throat and tried again. "A-are you being serious? This isn't some kind of joke?" Instead of saying anything in response to Rei's question, Kai carefully grabbed his face, mindful of his injury, and moved closer to him so that their breath mingled. A second later, Kai's lips were on Rei's warm, pliant ones and, just as the previous kiss they shared, this one was chaste and soft. When they broke apart, Rei's face was bright red. Kai let a small smile grace his lips. He thought Rei looked absolutely dazzling like that.

"Was that serious enough for you?" the bluenette asked, smile quickly turning into a smirk. Rei just nodded his head without saying anything, a silence, albeit a comfortable one, descended upon the two. They simply sat there, holding tightly onto the other's hand, and thought about everything that had transpired over the past couple of days, both amazed by the recent turn of events. Rei looked at Kai from the corner of his eye. He studied the man for a moment, debating on whether or not he should ask a question that had been bugging him since the first time they had shared a kiss. His curiosity winning out over his apprehension, Rei spoke up.

"Why?" he asked simply. Kai jerked out of his thoughts at the sound of the Chinese boy's voice and looked into questioning, golden eyes.

"What?" he asked back, not understanding what Rei was asking him.

"Why me? What made you decide that you wanted to pursue something? Why would you want to pursue something with me? And, why were you being such a jerk before?" he asked in a rushed breath, forcing Kai to have to really concentrate so that he could follow what what was being said. Once Rei was finished, Kai tried to quell the boy's fears and explain a few things to him.

"As for your first few questions, it's really easy. You're the most beautiful, kind, gentle person I've ever met. Nobody has ever been able to get past my defenses so easily, much less in a matter of days. You truly are an amazing person."

"Stop trying to make me cry." Rei mumbled when Kai paused. This caused an uncharacteristic chuckle to erupt from the Russian's mouth. He stroked Rei's hand and continued.

"As for your last question, I'm sorry. It's just the way I was raised." At Rei's confused gaze, Kai decided that, for the first time in more then ten years, he would tell someone his life's story.

TBC...

A/N: Bwahahahaha! A cliffy! ...of sorts... So, if you haven't guessed by now, the next chapter is going to be a bit more about Kai and his, Tala, and Bryan's pasts.

Ja-ne!