I only own Tsuki...blah blah blah, etc. No flames and remember to review. The next chapter should be up shortly or I'll hit my head against a brick wall...heh...this chapter makes me feel cold...like I'm feeling right now in real life...what's missing? but do ignore me, and read on.

italic- my own thoughts.

italic bold- someone elses thoughts(it'll be revealed soon with my past...)...

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Chapter 4 - Unworthy of death itself

Home…I miss home. I thought this all night long. I was feeling dazed and wasn't aware of my surroundings. I sighed, since it was 5 a.m. in the morning, I decided to go for a walk. The sky was pinkish purple and the sun peeked above the horizon. I smiled at this and continued walking. I don't know what to do! I just cant thing straight! Why do I miss home so? I still remember every horrible thing that happened there…I was left out often and ignored and looked down upon…and still I miss being there…why? I need to go home…I can feel it…

"Eh?" I crashed into a hand and immediately fell back, landing against someone. I could see the hand I had crashed into.

"If you kept walking straight you would've crashed into a tree," a voice said in a sweet yet mocking tone. I peeked above the hand and saw it was true.

"Oh…and what makes you awake this early, Hao?" I asked and stood up straight, off his chest, turning on my heel to face him.

"To find you," He smirked.

I raised an eyebrow, "And whatever for?" This atmosphere was happy and calm before he came…now it was cold and bitter. I felt a warm breeze blow, moving my hair. Our eyes were locked and I narrowed them…he had true intentions…and too many secrets…I couldn't trust him now…and I couldn't trust him before…

But you feel for him

…True. That was true. But I was completely over him.

"Your final test is…" He said, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"And it's…?" I hesitated before asking. '

He smirked again and turned his head away, letting a butterfly fly upon his hand. "To beat me," He stated and I froze as he burned the innocent butterfly. I stared at him…and for once in a long time in my feeble human life…I felt fear.

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We stood at the field where I had fought Sash. I had to persuade him to do battle here. I didn't want any outsiders to butt in or get hurt.

"So it has come to this…" I said in a grave tone, my head looking sideways and avoiding his gaze.

"Hmm…yes it has…the time when we would fight," Hao smiled. He wasn't taking this seriously.

"Yes…I guess so…so let it begin," I said. We both didn't move for a while and the breeze blew over us. It rippled the grass. Our eyes were locked and I could feel chills down my back…the fear and…the feelings I still was infested with for him. Finally he started walking towards me and all at once his face grew dark and his look nearly petrified me. The grass exploded into fire…I remember…once someone had told me…Hao's spirit of fire could burn anything…even flesh and bone. I felt the air drain out of me and fear replaced my calm mind.

"What's with that useless human look? I thought you would do better…" Hao's voice was thick with mock and disappointment. I felt anger rise in me and he smiled seeing my eyes now burned.

"SHUT UP!" I yelled at him and lunged at him but…I had let anger use me and make me weak. He suddenly appeared in front of me, burning a scar upon my stomach. Everything went black.

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Am I dead? No…I cant be…I have to make it home…I have so much dreams…I'M NOT GIVING IT ALL UP!!! NO! NEVER!!!!!!!

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I woke up, the room was dark and my body was so sore…I lifted the cloth on my stomach and saw the proof. There was a palm-sized scar…it was shaped of a star. That was all the proof I needed.

"Finally awake?" Ren asked.

"How am I still alive?" I asked back, quietly.

"Hao…he brought you to us covered in blood…Horo got mad but was taken back from Hao's glare. All he says was you're lucky to even be alive and…he held back against you," Ren softly said and shut the door behind him, leaving me alone.

I felt myself break. I was weak…too weak…if I couldn't even protect myself against Hao…how could I ever protect my friends from him? And how was I so unworthy of death itself??? One again in this lifetime and my past ones...i failed to die...Why couldn't I have die like the rest of them… a true fighter's death...and how could I possibly stand up to him again…and protect my friends…

Get stronger.

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