Grinning from ear to ear, Kio gave Soubi a push into the room. Without another thought, he swiftly closed the door behind him before the other two even had a chance to react.
Ritsuka looked at Soubi and took a cautious step forward, "It is okay if you don't really want to Soubi, I was only joking" he said softly, looking at how uncomfortable Soubi looked at being there with him. Being bold, Ritsuka took another step forward and smiled, thinking about his earlier conversation with Kio. "I do need to take a bath however, to clean off all of this sweat… and to re-bandage my wounds after the bath as well. Soubi," he paused, suddenly turning bright red and stared at the ground as he finished the rest of his question "will you help me bathe?"
Soubi wanted to chuckle as he watched his young love struggle to ask the question. He had to resist the urge however and instead politely responded, "Yes Ritsuka, I'll help you."
Ritsuka smiled up at him, "Thank you." He took Soubi by the hand and led him into the master bathroom. Shutting the door behind him, he took a minute to gather his courage. When he had finally mustered up enough courage, he turned around to face the older man. He grabbed Soubi by the back of the neck and pulled him down for a gentle kiss full of passion.
As Ritsuka's lips touched Soubi's own, he froze. For the first time, in a long time, Soubi was unsure how to proceed with the young man. The blonde inwardly groaned. 'Oh hell,' he thought. 'This is one of those moments where I could break every promise I have ever made to myself about him.' Slowly he began to respond to Ritsuka's sweet passionate kisses, unable to keep at least that much control over himself. 'Ah hell, a few of those promises can be broken. He is not twelve years old anymore. I vow to myself though that I will not make love to him until he has time to adjust, and turns eighteen years old. I will not touch him that way until he comes to terms with being raped.' He thought to himself, his new promise set firmly in place; he tangled one of his hands in Ritsuka's hair. The other hand snaked its way down around the young man's skinny frame. When the kiss ended, Soubi smiled as he watched the younger man turn bright red again as he asked him if Soubi would bathe with him. "As much as I would love to," he grimaced, "I cannot. I find you extremely intoxicating, to bathe with you right now, would be my undoing. Ritsuka right now, you are recovering from rape. Both mentally, and physically recovering. If I were to touch you now, in this moment of weakness, I would feel horrible for the rest of my life." He gazed into the younger mans eyes showing the wash of sadness that came over him. He gave the younger man another gentle kiss but filled with a fierce passion and promise. He watched as the younger man filled the tub with lukewarm water and some bubbles. Soubi turned away as the younger man pulled off his shorts and underwear, and did not turn around until Ritsuka was settled in the bath. He then went to Ritsuka's arms and slowly unwound the bandages. The sight was absolutely devastating; Soubi had to look away from Ritsuka's arms.
When Ritsuka saw the state of his arms, he gasped. He hadn't actually seen the damage he had done to himself. He was so detached from life at that moment he hadn't realized. Guilt washed over him, realizing too late that Soubi was in love with him. Had he only stayed and not have paid any attention to those two cretins; he would have realized that Soubi does care. If he had only talked to the one he claimed to love so much, he wouldn't have tried to die. He gazed down at the bubbles. 'What ifs, could have, should have, and would haves does not do very much good once the mistake is made.' Ritsuka thought to himself. He stayed silent throughout the rest of the bath. Glancing down at his arms, he sighed. "Oh god Soubi, the sight you must have seen. I'm so sorry."
"Why Ritsuka, why try to kill yourself? I was heartbroken to see you like that… Didn't you know that I am in love with you?" he spoke gently, not daring to let his emotions get the best of him. "I tell you all the time. I've told you that ever since I met you, I meant it when I said I love you."
"I heard you say it all those times, I just never believed it. How could I," he paused for dramatic effect "ever be loved? My name is loveless after all. And besides Soubi I was twelve, I didn't see how an adult could be in love with a child. And then, for some unknown reason I thought that since I had been raped, that you would no longer want me; that true to my name, I would be truly Loveless. I figured that if I did something dramatic, something that would scar, people would see me as undesirable. That people might just leave me alone." As he spoke his eyes glazed over, trying not to feel the emotions as he described them."
Soubi tilted the young man's head up to his so he could gently kiss him on the lips. "While it may be true that your name is Loveless, you are very loved. Instead of all the people who do not love you, think on all the people that do. Think of all the people who would sorely miss you if you were to leave this world. Just because I refuse to take you to bed with me right now, does not mean that I do not love you. If anything, that just shows my great love and respect for you even more." He gave him another kiss this one on the verge of becoming something more. "Would you like to step on out of the bathtub now, the water is getting cold. We will dry you off and re-wrap those bandages."