I didn't feel any different. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to look different now that I was no longer a virgin. Wasn't I supposed to look more like a grown-up? When I looked at myself in the mirror that night I was the same old girl I was that morning. Nothing had changed.

Okay that wasn't true. Plenty had changed. Last night I'd opened myself up to another person. Completely and in the most intimate way. It felt like a life changing experience for me. Quinn had done things to me that shattered my idea of romance and rebuilt it in her own beautiful image.

I was surprised at her ability to so thoroughly talk me out of my pants. Nothing about yesterday screamed romantic but somehow a few kind words, a slow dance, and she had me buck naked in bed doing my best to not let my fathers hear me calling out her name. It was a good thing they slept heavy and didn't hear us. If they had they'd done their best to keep breakfast this morning casual and not at all awkward. Then again my dads wouldn't confront me on the issue. They'd more than likely enlist the help of Ms. Pillsbury the school counselor and her endless stream of pamphlets to do their dirty work for them.

In spite of this horrid possibility I left for school the next day in great spirits. My friend Tina Cohen-Chang was waiting for me at my locker dressed in a black leather skirt with matching black tights and a black 'Born 2 Lose' tee shirt. On her hands were black leather gloves with missing fingers, and around her neck she wore a variety of black crosses and a something that looked like a dragon's head.

"Rach where have you been?" She asked. Her usual stutter was gone. Tina stuttered sporadically leading me to believe it was intentionally done to seek attention like her clothes, or worse psychosomatic. She didn't think I noticed possible deception but I did. When she got excited the trait faded in and out. The more complicated the word the less likely she was to stumble over it which I'd learned through a little bit of internet research was the complete opposite of what real stutterers did. Being a good friend I never brought it up.

"Home." I told her answering her question about my previous whereabouts. It was a strange question. I was here the same time I got here everyday. I was nothing if not punctual.

"Rach, Santana Lopez is looking for you." Tina told me. The eagerness of her tone relayed the importance of the words. Santana Lopez was Quinn's second in command. She was one of my main tormentors until Quinn had taken an interest in me ten months ago. She was beautiful despite Quinn's claims that she was merely pretty, she was mean, the meanest person I'd ever had the misfortune of meeting, and she was far and away the smartest person in school. She not only maintained a perfect 4.0 grade point average but she was extremely witty. She threw out some of the most hilarious zingers. Even when they were aimed at me I had to keep myself from laughing sometimes.

"What does she want?" I asked her. The concern seeping pitifully out of my mouth. One of Santana's more unfortunate traits was her quick temper. She seemed to constantly be getting herself into fights these days. When Quinn wanted discipline meted out she sent Santana. She was the enforcer. Having her looking for me couldn't be good.

Tina shrugged. She wouldn't know. Santana probably didn't know Tina existed and if I knew Tina she wanted to keep it that way. Santana had been torturing me since fifth grade and I couldn't remember one instance where Tina Cohen-Chang, my supposedly best friend, had ever come to my defense.

I didn't give Tina a chance to freak me out with her cowardice. I ditched my bag in my locker grabbed my books for my first period class and ran off. As long as I was in class I was safe. I wasn't sure what the fiery Latina wanted but I wasn't eager to find out. The one thing I knew about myself was that I wasn't a fighter. Standing up to Santana would be brave but it would also be foolish. I'd most likely end up getting my rear end kicked.

I managed to get through two whole classes without incident. I'd seen Quinn once in the hall and she'd given me her usual blank stare. I ducked my head and shuffled off. Five seconds after seeing Quinn I ducked into the bathroom to check my face. My cell went off and I dug it eagerly out of my pocket, it had to be Quinn. Nobody else sent me texts during school hours. My friends were much too studious for that.

The screen name came up Lucy. Quinn's real name was Lucy but nobody knew that little bit but of information but me. She'd told me to program the name in my phone with her phone number so nobody would know we were speaking. I wanted to tell her this wouldn't actually be an issue, nobody looked through my cell phone, but I kept my mouth shut. I pulled up the message and immediately blushed when I read it.

Does somebody still love me?

My mind flashed back to last night when she'd put her hands between my legs and felt my excitement for her. Instead of making some crude comment about how wet I was she playfully commented that 'somebody loved her'. Oh my god was she sending me dirty messages during school hours now? It was all so scandalous. What if somebody found this? I quickly typed a response.

Not until this very second.

She texted me back right away.

I wanna see you again tonight. I'll get a place after school where we can go. We'll have total privacy.

I didn't want to be her booty call and had to put my foot down.

I don't want to be some booty call.

She ignored the comment.

You in or out?

I wanted to cry.

In.

I'd just demoted myself to booty call status.

(Later)

I spent the next few hours in a daze. Quinn and I were dating, kind of, seeing her and giving her sex wasn't a booty call. By the time I went to gym class I'd all but convinced myself I was doing the right thing. There was nothing wrong with being intimate with my girlfriend when her physical needs crept up. It was flattering that she was thinking about me.

"Hey Rupal. You been avoiding me?"

My stomach did a flip. Santana had found me. What was she doing in here? Was she even in gym this period?

"Hello." Was all I could manage to say.

She walked over near where I was sitting and straddled the bench next to me. "Hey."

"Hi." I repeated nervously.

She looked around the locker room making sure we were alone and with the comfort of somebody who knew me intimately brushed the hair out of my eyes. The gesture threw me off balance and I forced myself to stare at her.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

She smiled. I couldn't ever remember seeing her smile before. She had a pretty smile. "Nothing. I've been looking for you today. Did anybody tell you?"

I shrugged. "Maybe. I didn't do anything to you. So if your going to beat me up I'd at least like a twenty four hour reprieve to mentally prepare myself."

Twenty four hours was more than enough time for Quinn to back her off. Dating the school's most popular girl wasn't all bad. Even if she kept me locked in her pocket she did offer me some luxuries most of the students couldn't provide. Nobody bothered me. Well she and her friends did but that didn't count. She told me yesterday it was a secret handshake.

"I don't want to beat you up. I was wondering what you were doing later. Brittany's out of town visiting her grandparents and I'm going to have the night free. I was wondering if you wanted to do something."

Wait. What? "Something like what?"

She didn't blink. She was serious. "Dinner. Movie. I know you like musicals. I heard you sing back in Glee club before coach Sylvester had it disbanded. Maybe we can go see that High School Musical or something."

I wanted to laugh. High School Musical? "Why? I'm sure you have other friends."

"Who says I wanted to be your friend?" She smiled at me and let me know she wasn't asking as a person interested in being my friend. She was asking me out. Was she a lesbian? Since when? Were all the popular girls at this school closeted lesbians?

"Are you asking me out?"

She reached over and patted my thigh. I'd already changed into my ugly gym uniform and she took the opportunity to fondle my bare skin.

"Would you say yes if I were?"

I didn't know what to say. I loved Quinn, Santana was gorgeous but she wasn't the kind of girl I ever saw myself being comfortable with. She scared the crap out of me.

"If I were a lesbian I would." I said. Quinn had drilled into me a thousand times that I should never admit to being gay. She said it would be akin to committing social suicide.

"Come on Berry I know you like me. You think I'm a hot piece of ass right? Why wouldn't you want to tap this? Why don't I come on over and show you a good time later. I won't tell anybody. I'm lonely."

I steeled myself and swallowed hard. "You're beautiful Santana. I think you're very attractive and if I were into girls I'd definitely consider going out with you. But I'm not. Besides you and Brittany are friends right?"

"Britt and I are none of your business." Her tone swung on a dime and she was suddenly freaked out and furious. Homophobia, I could spot it anywhere. If she were a homophobe what the hell was she doing hitting on me? There was something wrong here. She was up to something. This didn't feel right.

"I like boys." I told her. "But I am flattered."

She scoffed at me and pulled herself off the bench. "Loser." She threw at me like a flaming spear.

Like a curtain had been drawn back on the room a parade of girls came out from around the surrounding lockers. Quinn and the aforementioned Brittany were among them. Looks like she wasn't visiting her grandmother after all. I knew it.

"I told you she wouldn't fall for it Quinn. Not even Berry's this stupid." Santana said. When I locked eyes with Quinn my heart broke in my chest. This was her idea. Why would she want to humiliate me like this? How could she be so cruel to me? Especially after yesterday.

I bit my lip as my eyes began to water. She stared at me expressionless before directing the girls out of the room. "Everybody go away." She ordered, she watched them all leave then took a few steps towards me. "Rachel." She called out to me softly in her I'm sorry voice. I was extremely familiar with that voice.

I was off the bench and walking away before she could reach me. "Thirty eight." Was all I said as I disappeared into a bathroom stall.

(After School)

"I was helping you. I don't know what you're so pissed off about. I did you a huge favor and all you're doing is giving me shit for it. Those girls wanted to do a lot worse to you and I got them to do something I knew you could think your way out of. How many times have I told you never admit anything? Can't you see I helped you?" She shook her head with anger. "No, you don't care. You only care about yourself. Poor Rachel and her thirty seven tears."

It was classic Quinn. I was overreacting. She was the innocent victim falsely accused. She'd met me in my driveway after school and cornered me before I went into the house. She was totally beside herself with anger. I couldn't believe it. After the crap she'd pulled earlier she was angry at me. Suddenly I was the bad guy.

"Don't you dare blame this on me. You and your friends tried to humiliate me. What if I had told her okay? What would have happened next?" I asked.

She didn't like this question. Her eyes seemed to darken. "What do you mean what if you told her okay? Were you thinking about going out with her?"

I shrugged. "She's pretty." I'd never have gone out with Santana but Quinn didn't know that.

"And she's my best friend. And you're my fucking girlfriend. You're not going out with anybody but me. I won't allow it."

She won't allow it? "You don't own me. I can do whatever what I want."

She stared at me, her face a mask of anger and confidence. "Yeah I do own you. That ass of yours is Fabray property. And you will not be going anywhere with anybody besides me."

How dare her. "I'm not your property."

She seemed to think things over in her head then her face went slack and she sighed deeply. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I said that. Of course I don't own you. You can do whatever you want. But what I'd like is for you not to speak to Santana again."

"Ever?" I asked.

"At all." She said. The fact that this was a drastic overreaction seemed lost on her.

It wouldn't be hard in any case. Santana and I weren't friends anyway. "Fine."

"Rachel the idea of you with anybody else makes me sick. The thought of you kissing somebody besides me, touching them like you touched me, doing with them what you should only be doing with me makes me want to throw up. I may have said that you were mine but its only because I love you." She reached out and stroked my cheek. "I love you and I thought you loved me. Don't you love me? Why would you want to be with some other girl?"

I folded like a cheap tent. "Of course I love you. I'd never cheat on you. You heard me say no to Santana."

"If you love me then show me how much. Come with me."

Is that all it took? A flash of her smile and a few sweet words to sweep me off my feet? God am I pathetic or what? I nodded defeated. I couldn't say no to her. Wouldn't. I wanted to be with her. I wanted to show her how much I loved her. If that meant I had to swallow my pride occasionally then so be it.

"Okay. Let's go."

(At the hotel)

I'd never seen her so relaxed. Quinn wasn't the type to let her guard down. She was tense, she was constantly looking over her shoulder and even when we were locked in my room I got the feeling she was expecting something unexpected to happen. It could be taken as her being uptight. I just liked to think she was cautious. It was more than caution though, it was fear. It was always there, lurking in the shadows like a monster hiding under the bed.

That's why seeing her this way was so awesome. I'd never seen her this relaxed before. It was almost as if she was able to block out the things that normally hung over her head. It made sense. We were tucked in a hotel room miles away from any place familiar. There were no familiar faces, no familiar places, just the two of us like she promised. I still had no idea how she'd managed to score us this place. Hotels didn't normally rent rooms out to seventeen year old girls. Yet here we were.

She was in her underwear again. Pink polka dots this time. Pink panties that hugged her curves perfectly and made my mouth water with anticipation of seeing her naked once again. She had a bottle of some cheap liquor in her hand as she danced around the room singing off beat at the top of her lungs.

"They be like Quinn. WHAT! Can you teach me how to Dougie? You know why? Cause all these bitches love me."

I wasn't sure how she wasn't spilling booze all over the floor as she Dougie'd around the room singing along to the Cali Swag District. Truthfully I didn't really like rap too much but suddenly this was my favorite song in the world. She looked so sexy dancing, hips shaking, body gyrating around the room. It could have been the fact that she was half naked but I really wanted to jump her bones.

She was drunk off her behind but it was fun to see her letting loose. "Get up here and dance with me baby." She told me. I declined the invitation and she didn't force the issue. Instead switching topics with lighting speed. "I am soooo gonna put it on you tonight. You just don't even know. I called your dads and told them you were spending the night at my house. My mom thinks I'm with some random girl from the Cheerios." She took another swig of her alcohol and nodded. "As a matter of fact you should be getting undressed right now because I'm gonna make you scream my name tonight baby."

I laughed at her drunken debauchery. I was already in my underwear even though she was so drunk she probably didn't even notice. With my luck she'd be passed out in minutes and this whole night would have been for nothing. In any case it was the most exciting Friday night I've had in a long time. I'd otherwise probably be home watching TV with my dads.

A loud series of knocks hit the door causing me to jump out of the bed scrambling for my clothes. Who in the world was that? My dads? Did they follow us here? The hotel manager? Were we making too much noise? Quinn's cell phone was a decent MP3 player but it wasn't loud enough to bother the current lodgers was it? I scrambled to wrap my skirt around my waist and cover myself. Unfortunately drunk Quinn didn't have the same reservations. She stumbled over to the door yanking it open without bothering to get dressed.

"What the hell do you want? I'm trying to get my freak on in here." She asked whoever was on the other side of the door. If I wasn't so horrified I'd have laughed at the absurdity of her behavior. Quinn wouldn't be caught dead behaving this way. She was going to be so angry when she sobered up.

"Hey!" She screamed loud and excitedly. "I'm having a party and I'm about to get my freak on." She turned away from the door to face me as I continued to fumble with my skirt. "Hey come see who it is. You'll never guess." She said. It took me a moment to realize she was talking to me. She stumbled towards me grabbing me tightly by the wrist. "Come see."

I tried to fight her off but she was stronger than me. Even drunk I was no match for her. "Quinn send whoever that is away. Don't let them in." I told her. "And put some clothes on."

"Too late." I heard somebody say. When I heard the voice I knew right away who it was. Santana Lopez was a lot of things but stupid wasn't one of them. She was inside the room with her sidekick Brittany trailing behind her before I had the chance to slam the door.

When her eyes met mine I saw a smile creep across her face. I could see her putting the pieces together in her head. Brittany was standing near the door her hands covering her mouth totally in shock. The secret was out.

"I don't believe it." Santana said. "YOU?" She asked me. "YOU!" She was shocked. "You're who's she's sneaking around with? I thought it was Puckerman."

I tried to throw her off the scent. Quinn would know what to say if she wasn't bombed. "It's not what you think. There's a perfectly normal explanation for this."

Brittany began to laugh. "I'd like to hear it whatever it is."

I'd never really gotten to know Brittany Pierce. She was simply Quinn and Santana's dimwitted friend. I didn't know much about her but what Quinn told me. From what I was told she was an excellent dancer and apparently wasn't quite as dumb as she pretended to be.

"Me too." Santana added still smiling. "Explain to me why you two are hiding out in a hotel room dancing around in your underwear. And I'm pretty sure getting your freak on is universal slang for knocking boots."

I turned my attention to Quinn looking for some sort of assistance but the music changed and she was back to drinking and dancing. Fergie's London Bridge was playing now and Quinn was really starting to entertain herself. Brittany pushed the door shut and began to dance along with her. Quinn shoved the bottle of booze towards her friend and Brittany took a long swig.

"I like this Quinn much better than the old Quinn." Brittany announced to nobody in particular.

"Did we interrupt something Man-Hands?" Santana asked.

Before I got a chance to respond Quinn was in my face. Her voice dropped to a whisper. Or at least what she thought was a whisper. "You're not supposed to talk to her. Ever. You promised. I'm not gonna let her get your pants off. You're all mine. Santana's okay but she'll steal you away from me. I can't let that happen. I love you too much."

"Aww." Brittany said from across the room. "You guys are so cute."

So much for denying things with a simple explanation. "I know." Was all I could say to Quinn but she had already lost interest.

Santana looked around the room and began to shake her head. "I agree with Britt. I like this Quinn so much better too."

(In the morning)

I woke up on the bed with Quinn's arm wrapped around my waist. Santana and Brittany were snuggled up on the floor under a couple of mattress sheets. Brittany's clothes had come off almost as fast as Quinn's. She was a lot more fun than I thought she'd be. She kept the mood light and fun and whenever Santana had the urge to say something mean Brittany reigned her in. Once they were both nice and drunk they were making out in a corner like we weren't even in the room.

They weren't the run of the mill high school girls either. They were familiar with one another. They knew what each other liked, special spots that drove the other crazy. They were definitely more than meets the eye. This clearly wasn't the first time they'd made out.

"What the hell happened last night?" I heard Quinn ask. She was awake. This should be fun. I bet she didn't remember a thing.

"You got wasted."

"I know that much." She peeked under the bed spread and realized she was still wearing her underwear. "Did I pass out before we had the chance to do anything fun?"

I nodded. "It's okay."

She looked around the room. "It's early right. We have at least until noon. I'm game if you are."

She wasn't serious. "We can't."

She pulled away not angry but certainly not happy with my refusal. "Why not? What now?"

I motioned to the floor with my head. "What about those two?"

Her head snapped around like lightening. I could see her face drain of color when she spotted her friends cuddling on the floor. We'd gone through the trouble of traveling a whole town away and somehow her friends had still found us.

"What the hell are they doing here?" She whispered to me.

I shrugged. "I don't know they're your friends. They just showed up last night. I think they thought you were hooking up with Noah Puckerman. They may have tracked us down."

She rested her head on my chest. "Fucking Finn. I'm gonna kill him."

I had no idea what Finn Hudson captain of the football team had to do with anything. Did he tell them where we were? How did he know?

"What do they know?" She asked me. Her face was cold and serious. She was back to the tense and careful Quinn.

"Everything. You told them everything." I admitted. There was no use in lying about it now. It was pretty obvious.

She pulled away from me and began to shake her head. "Get dressed. We have to leave."