The following day, Merlin woke early and seemed none the worse for his ordeal, except that he ached all over. But, he reasoned, that was every bit as likely to be from Arthur's tortuous training session as any other-wordly vision experience. Which, it turned out, he didn't remember.

"You don't remember anything?"

"Nope, there was just this pain," he explained, gesturing behind his head with one hand, whilst clutching the apple he was halfway through with the other. "It was spreading and getting worse and then…" he shook his head. "I don't remember anything after that. I don't even remember going to bed." He took a bite of his apple. "What do you think it means?"

"I think it means that what you saw of the future may be breaking through your unconscious mind," Gauis said seriously.

Merlin stopped chewing. "Really?"

"It seems a likely explanation."

"But I thought all that stuff I saw about the future was going away," Merlin protested. "I thought that, now my memory of the visions was fading, now I had more control of what I was seeing, it was going to keep on getting better!"

"I'd hoped so too," Gaius said.

"But…" he looked troubled. "Gaius… what did I even say anyway?"

Gaius turned to the piece of paper he'd written on the previous night, and which he'd been up late studying to try to decipher its meaning. He handed it to Merlin, who took it and read it quickly.

"Three crows?" he said looking up. "Death from beneath us? It's gibberish! Maybe I just had – I don't know – sun stroke or something. Maybe Arthur bashed me on the head one too many times."

"It's possible," Gaius acquiesced with a slight tilt of his head.

"But you don't think so," Merlin said.

"No I don't."

"Why?"

"Because, Merlin, you have a power inside you that the world has never seen, and that power includes the rare ability to see the future. It is a power that was harnessed and accelerated by your imprisonment in the Crystal Cave. Now for all that that was a terrible experience and we'd all like to imagine it didn't happen, it is necessary to acknowledge that it did. And we have never fully known what the legacy would be. Maybe this is it."

"I know what Alvarr did to me," Merlin said steadily. "But that was months ago. If this was going to happen, why is it happening now?"

"The brain is a very funny thing, and none of us understands it fully. Maybe by getting the visions under control, what you've really been doing is repressing them. Maybe they're being forced to find another conduit out of you. Maybe that's what this is. And as to why it's happening now, I don't know," he said honestly. "Maybe it's a warning that something is about to happen, something so bad that we've been given this message."

"About crows and broken hearts?" Merlin waved the piece of parchment. "It's not a message, it's – a riddle."

"It may be a riddle, but we're going to have to work it out, and quickly."

"I don't have the time," Merlin protested, putting the paper down. "Arthur's riding out this morning, and he'll already be in a foul mood that I'm not there to help him prepare."

"Merlin you can't go riding with Arthur!" Gaius exclaimed. "We don't know what the effects of this incident may be. We don't know if you'll have another one."

That stopped Merlin in his tracks, the thought of spouting gibberish in front of Arthur making his heart sink. "Oh that's just perfect," he said. "Now I'm not only passing out and having visions, I'm doing it in front of the son of Uther Pendragon!"

"I didn't say you would have another vision. Just that we don't know what's causing this and it might be a good idea for you to stay here until we do know."

Whatever response Merlin was about to give was rudely interrupted by the door slamming open. Arthur was standing there, and he was not smiling. He strode in, confidence exuding from every inch of him. He was dressed in his travelling clothes.

"Merlin," he said, coming to a stop.

Merlin's heart sank even further. If that were possible. "Yes sire."

The prince regent regarded him, ignoring Gaius. "Do you have the ability to tell time?"

"Yes sire."

"And do you have the ability to tell what day it is?"

He resisted the urge to roll his eyes and spit out a cheeky response. "Yes sire."

"Then do you mind telling me why you are not in my chambers right now helping me to prepare for what is possibly the most important journey we've taken this summer?"

Merlin opened his mouth, but it was Gaius who got there first. "Forgive me sire," he spoke up loudly. "But it was me who detained Merlin and stopped him from coming to you this morning."

Arthur gave Merlin one more glare, then turned to Gaius. "Oh?"

"Yes. He was unwell when he first rose, and I wished him to remain here until I was satisfied that he had at least eaten something."

Arthur frowned and turned back to Merlin, who held up his browning apple with a slight, sheepish grin.

"I see," Arthur said, clearly struggling between not believing Gaius' excuse, and a slight hint of concern. "And will you be well enough to ride out with us today?"

This time Merlin got in first before Gaius could respond. "Of course sire," he insisted.

Arthur's gaze was penetrating, but Merlin didn't flinch before the prince, who turned once again to Gaius. The physician's expression was more uncertain. "Gaius?"

Gaius saw Merlin's frown and felt his resolve weaken. He knew his nephew didn't like to be separated from Arthur's side if he could help it. These days he took his job as protector very seriously. "If Merlin feels well enough to ride, sire, I shan't stop him."

"Very well," Arthur clearly had no inclination to give this conversation more of his attention. "Be in the courtyard ready to leave in one hour," he commanded his servant, making to leave. "Oh, and Merlin? Having gone to the effort of providing you with armour, which, I need not remind you, I had to have custom made to fit your girlish frame, I would very much appreciate it if you actually wore it. There's nothing worse than turning round in the middle of a skirmish to find you hiding behind a bush with nothing but a tatty coat to protect you from stray arrows."

Merlin looked less than pleased. "It's heavy," he complained.

"Yes Merlin, that's because it's made of metal. We find it's better for repelling swords and daggers than armour made out of string."

"Alright," he held his hands up in submission. "Alright I'll wear it."

"Good," Arthur said, and left without further comment.

"Merlin," Gaius stopped him as he was about to make good his escape to his bedroom. The boy turned back to him, rather reluctantly. "As I said to Arthur, I shan't stop you going on this trip if you are determined to go, but you'd better start thinking about what you're going to do if you feel another vision coming on."

Merlin nodded, and managed a half smile. "Don't worry Gaius. If I feel a bit more death in the darkness coming my way, I'll certainly be ready for it."

Merlin had made the decision to tell Gwaine about his ability to tell the future about an hour into their morning's ride. Before he'd even made it the courtyard he'd started thinking along those lines, though at that point, he'd been considering telling both Gwaine and Lancelot. But Lancelot, it turned out, had injured himself in the training session the day before, some damage to his ankle that made it awkward for him to walk, and so he was staying behind. And that left Gwaine.

Merlin considered how he was going to tell him as they rode along, occasionally pulling at his mail byrnie to try and redistribute its weight (not that it made any difference). But he hadn't come up with anything even remotely better than: 'So Gwaine, did I ever mention that I could tell the future…' before Arthur had called a halt for lunch.

They'd come about four leagues from the castle, and were still well within Camelot's borders. But Merlin had felt a sense of dread beginning to grow within him with each step of their horses.

"Merlin, go and collect some fire wood," Arthur commanded after he'd set guards – always the first priority. "But don't be too long. I don't want this stop to take all day."

"Yes sire," Merlin agreed. Then a thought struck him. "Can I take Gwaine?"

Arthur raised his eyebrows a little at that and glanced at the dark haired knight, who'd already unpacked what he needed from his horse, and didn't seem to be doing anything of particular importance.

"Sure I'll go with him," Gwaine said good naturedly. "Worrying about those wolves and bears are we Merlin?" he went on, coming over to his friend and slapping him over-heartily on the shoulder."

"Yeah, the bears are terrible in these parts," Merlin smiled as they turned away together from Arthur. "Bears as big as – houses so they say."

"You know I fought a bear once," Gwaine said as they walked together from the clearing.

"Really? Who won?" Merlin asked.

"It was a bit of a draw, actually," he said. "He went into hibernation before I could finish him off."

"Yeah?" Merlin had a big grin on his face by this time.

"Yeah. Big paws though. And you know what they say about bears with big paws"

"No, what do they say about bears with big paws?"

Gwaine glanced his way. "Big paw prints."

"Right," Merlin laughed, looking over his shoulder to see how far away they were from the others. Out of ear shot anyway. "Look," he became serious, his face changing and his smile fading like the moon going behind a cloud. "I need to talk to you."

"So talk," Gwaine said, leaning down to pick up his first stick.

Merlin squirmed a little, still not hugely happy about what he was about to do, but determined to do it now that he'd made up his decision. "You know what happened to me," he went on, casting about on the floor himself and picking up a ridiculously small twig, before looking at it in disgust and breaking it in two. "When I was captured by Alvarr?"

Gwaine looked over at him, matching his seriousness instantly at mention of the sorcerer's name. He looked away again, uncomfortable. "I know what the outcome was," he said.

"Right," Merlin said again. "The whole…" he waved a hand in front of his face. "Glazy eyed thing."

"Yeah," Gwaine agreed. "That."

"And you know I have magic," Merlin said with deadly seriousness, because sometimes, just sometimes, a little part of him still said that the reason Gwaine never had a problem with what he was, was because he didn't actually get it.

Gwaine just gave a little smile and looked over again. "Yeah, that I know," he admitted.

"Okay," Merlin went on, trying to get a feel for the conversation. "So, Alvarr put me in this cave."

"The Crystal Cave," Gwaine broke in. "I was there when we rescued you. Very pretty."

"Pretty," Merlin agreed. "And powerful. It's the birthplace of magic so they say."

Gwaine nodded, he was still picking up firewood. "Gaius said that's why it affected you. It's why you went all," he waved his hand in front of his face like Merlin had done.

"Yes," Merlin went on, trying to be quick. "But it's more than that. It's a source of knowledge, a place you can go to see things. See… the past… the present… the future."

He let that hang there while Gwaine picked up another stick.

"Gwaine," he said to draw his attention. "I went like I did because when I was in the cave, I saw the future, I saw too much of it."

Gwaine was looking at him with a confused expression. "How much is too much?"

He shrugged. "I saw all of it."

"Because you're a sorcerer?"

"Not entirely," Merlin hedged. "Look, when the dragon put Gwen inside my 'nightmares' as he called them, he put her inside the visions I was seeing of the future and couldn't get away from. She helped me to escape them, but in doing so she saw what I saw. I don't know why, but when we got out, she forgot everything she'd seen. If you ask her now, she genuinely doesn't remember anything that happened."

He let that hang there for a bit as well.

"She said she couldn't remember," Gwaine agreed. "She's talked about it." They looked at each other. "She also said that you couldn't remember."

Merlin dropped his gaze, feeling the seep of guilt. "I lied," he whispered.

Gwaine just kept looking at him.

Merlin eventually pulled his gaze back up from the floor, hideously aware that this time limited conversation didn't afford him the luxury of wallowing in emotion. "I lied because I had to," he justified, still having problems meeting Gwaine's eyes. "The future is full of dangers, but knowing it is perhaps most dangerous of all. It's too easy to let it consume and obsess you. My knowledge could bring heartache and strife to so many. I had to lie – to protect people." He looked Gwaine in the eye finally, trying not to appear like he was pleading. "Do you believe me?"

The knight chewed his lip slightly, seeming to consider. Then he nodded. "So why are you telling me now?"

Merlin heard his name being called and glanced over his shoulder. "I'll tell you everything later," he said coming forward. "I promise. But I needed to warn you," his name was called again, but he ignored it. "When I came back, I worked hard at getting the visions under control. I was able to temper what I saw, get back to a more or less normal life and so continue protecting Arthur. But something's happened. I had a vision last night. Gaius said I just started spouting gibberish and then keeled over, but I don't remember anything." He took a step forward. "If the same thing happens again while we're on this mission, if Arthur sees…" he broke off, at a loss to actually know, now that it came to it, what he wanted. What did he need Gwaine to do?

Then the knight smiled, genuinely and warmly and came towards him. He put a hand on his shoulder. "You need me to spin Arthur some completely made up idiotic tale for you?" he asked.

Yeah that would do it.

Merlin nodded meekly.

Gwaine shrugged. "Sure," he said. "You start going all weird and talking in tongues, I'll just tell Arthur you've been downing sloe gin behind his back the whole day. How would that do?"

"Thanks?" Merlin looked unsure. Then his name was yelled again in a manner that did not allow refusal.

"Better get some more wood," Gwaine suggested, grinning as he glanced down at what Merlin was holding, before patting him on the shoulder again and heading off back to the clearing. Merlin looked down himself to find that he was still holding a small piece of twig in each hand.

Rolling his eyes, he dropped them quickly, and began scrabbling around for more substantial pieces of firewood.

TBC